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    the walten files
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    digimon
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    payback the series
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    miraculous ladybug
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    fashion

What if Erid invented intergalactic fast travel

I don't support Eva bashing that's emotional support environmental terrorist right there. What I'm interested in is the bad pr she is giving earth because the eridian ambassador is too invested in his flesh teddy bears life

if you've ever noticed that indeed barely has any jobs on it lately, it's NOT just you. they started charging companies to post job listings on there and it seems to have significantly decreased the amount of posts (at least anecdotally).

to those of you who need to hear this: there are absolutely surgeries that give you both a penis and vagina at the same time, they're called salmacian surgeries! look them up!

so in the 2003 Aquaman series they introduce a new backstory for archvillain Black Manta in which the entire reason for his (hyper)fixation on destroying Aquaman's life was severely maltreated autism, which Aquaman then cures him of with his magic water hand to completely redeem him. and this is obviously insanely stupid and ill-conceived and genuinely hateful, but given all of that, this is still one of the funniest speech balloons i've ever read in a comic. me @ myself when i remember how i acted in high school or whatever

It's weird to think about how long Undertale has existed by now and how influential it's been on contemporary indie creatives. For example, Gooseworx (Amazing Digital Circus) was originally popular for making Undertale remixes. Joel G (ENA)'s first video uploads are Undertale fan animations. Even the Deltarune guy started off making Undertale stuff

hey guys it broke containment. anyway

fuck marry kill
21,109 votes • Remaining time: 4 days 20 hours

the platelets in my body when I rip off the fresh scab they just spent hours working on

if you are a queer earring maker at a queer friendly event you should have clipons and ADVERTISE THEM you will make SO MUCH FUCKING MONEY there are SO MANY CUTE TRANS GIRLS who want to try your earrings but don't have pierced ears!!!!!! I repeat YOU WILL MAKE SO MUCH MONEY IF YOU DO THIS

Mirrors part 11/11!!! (Simon is NOT beating the wet cat allegations)

A bit omninous but good overall I'd say 👍

ALSO even though 'Mirrors' is over I will still be continuing the story! Think of each comic as a chapter of a connected story I'm writing!

Among The Hail Mary [Part 8] - Start | Prev | END!

And this concludes the main storyline for Among The Hail Mary! It has been a crazy almost month and a half since ATHM came to me in a fever dream, and I could not have been happier for it to reach it's main conclusion! Thank you all so much for loving this AU!

The main storyline may be complete, but there are plans for smaller storylines! You can follow the [ATHM Masterpost] over on my Update Blog if you would like notification updates on future ATHM content! But for now, the rat would like to take a break from the AU series and focus their attention on other projects and AUs that's been cooking in the background! Thanks for reading!

The first time I went to Georgia, I stepped out of the car, walked to the porch, immediately had a fat fucking roach scuttle past my foot, said “This place has roaches.” only for my father to respond “Nah. It’s just a palmetto bug. 😌” and that was how I found out about the costal southeastern cultural tradition of lying to yourself by pretending all the roaches are native wildlife and not visibly a winged cockroach of the pest variety.

trans women who "don't mind topping" or are "fine with having a penis I guess" take my hand

Weekly update - Day3

I'm still working on the café scene! A lot happens here, so you'll probably be seeing this background until you're tired of it. A few other characters will likely need new sprites, along with some additional backgrounds. I'm still experimenting with these scenes to see what works best.

I think I've mentioned this before, but I like testing unfinished backgrounds and sprites first to see if they fit the scene I'm imagining. A lot of the time I end up discarding them, which saves me from spending hours finishing artwork that might never be used.

That said... I have a feeling many of you are going to love the café scenes ouo --- Ainda trabalhando na cena do café! Muita coisa acontece aqui, então você provavelmente verá esse fundo até se cansar. Alguns outros personagens provavelmente precisarão de novos sprites, juntamente com alguns planos de fundo adicionais. Ainda estou experimentando essas cenas para ver o que funciona melhor.

Acho que já mencionei isso antes, mas gosto de testar fundos e sprites inacabados primeiro para ver se eles se encaixam na cena que estou imaginando. Muitas vezes acabo descartando-os, o que me poupa tempo ao inves de perder muito tempo em algo que não de pra usar no final.

Bom... Tenho a sensação de que muitos de vocês vão adorar as cenas do café ouo

Joe Hills stuff that I tend to assume people know (like in the academics overestimate comic):

  • Joe is one of two people who have been wholly in charge of hermitcraft (Joe's reign as dictator lasted for the duration of time it took to confirm all the decisions for the start of season two, after which he stepped down)
  • Joe wrote hermitcraft fanfic (as part of a video) long before many hermitcraft fanfic writers got started
  • Joe led a one man, multiple day protest outside record label Warner Chappell for ruthlessly copyright striking Mumbo and putting his channel in real danger
  • Joe's channel music is a mix of original songs and parodies created in collaboration with his cool as hell sister Quinn Hills (hi Quinn if you're seeing this). She has a cat called Blair Witch, writes fantastic music, and is a vocally trans artist
  • Joe has consistently featured guest speakers in his streams or videos over the years, whether that be pathfinder writers, activists, or community members coming in to help offer viewpoints on his builds
  • Joe has admin permissions on hermitcraft (usually to his own detriment in accidentally clearing his inventory) and is a member of the hermitcraft "secret council" (as Cleo put it), who are the people who regularly turn up to meetings and do some actual admin and decision making
  • Joe and Cleo first met when they were challenged to fight to death by Vechs. Joe won the fight and then Cleo stabbed him in the back for vengeance. They both made overdramatic videos to prepare for this
  • Joe thought hermitcraft was a scam when he was invited a few weeks into season one (as a wildcard member)
  • Joe used to be part of the team who made the webcomic Jaque of All Blades and got his streaming start doing art streams.
  • Joe is also one of the authors of the Penguins and Pitfalls TTRPG, which he developed as part of Team Snow Day (TSD)
  • Joe pays all of his staff fairly for their time and classes blazing posts on Tumblr (especially for the mcyt sexyman competition) as marketing so that the IRS can see he's running a real business, not a fraud scheme
  • Joe's webcam expands on stream in response to tips. It moves from the hot bar into the Jhost (with the mandatory Jacob Marley chains bit) before growing larger and more transparent until he is gone. Once the Jhost is fully expanded, the beetlejhost comes out (with the suit and the webcam expander song). Once we max out beetlejhost, we get Joemez Addams (who wears a different suit)
  • Joe is one of only two hermits to have played every hermitcraft season (although he missed a lot of season 3 with a newborn baby to look after)
  • Joe's coup was responsible for getting mumbo added to the server. Shortly after, he suggested in a meeting that no members under the age of 18 should be admitted. Mumbo, 17, kept very quiet
  • Joe and Cleo did a Minecraft Christmas album years ago. It's bad. I love it
Anonymous asked:

We know monsters live very long, and humans don't, and Pierrot wants to be with MC forever, is he aware of the fact that they'll die before him? and does it scare him?

Our dear Pierrot hasn't thought that far ahead yet... unfortunately.

Sounds like something he'd have trouble accepting, doesn't it?

ˎˊ˗frat!jo just loves fucking his nerdy little girlfriend while she's reading ! (m.list)

cw ˎˊ˗ ⤷ p in v sex & prone bone ── nsfw! mdni!

note: not my best work, sorry! :(

you’re flat on your stomach, book open in front of you, while your boyfriend’s mean cock slams into your cunt from behind. your glasses are already lying somewhere on the floor and every thrust shoves your hips into the mattress and knocks the air out of your lungs, but he doesn’t care.

he just keeps driving deeper, hips snapping hard enough to make your ass ripple with every impact.

“read sweets,” he orders, a low moan vibrating against your ear. his hand fists in your hair, keeping your face tilted toward the page. “every word, baby. don’t stop.”

he's been making you hoarsely read out blurry words for a good hour, and your voice is shaking as you read out the next scentence. “the…the knight entered the hall—mnghhhh!

another brutal thrust punches the rest of the line into a broken moan. he doesn’t let up. his cock drags almost all the way out before he rams back in, stretching your soaked pussy around him until your own juices are dripping down your thighs and onto his white sheets.

“keep going,” he growls, and you can practically hear the grin on his lips. the headboard knocks against the wall with every thrust. your cunt clenches around him, slick and greedy, but he only laughs and fucks you harder. “mm, don’t you dare skip a line baby.”

you swallow, eyes blurring on the text. your mind is mush, and you can barely get any words oit. “h-he… he approached the, hnghhh, throne—” your words fracture into a whimper when he grinds deep onside you, his pelvis pressing flush to your ass, cock pulsing inside your walls.

"oh baby," he coos mockingly. his breath is hot on your nape and his fingers dig into your shoulders "c'mon, you've been ignoring me 'cause of that fuckass book! i wanna know what the hell that book has that i don't!" his voice shifts into a pouty whine.

tch, jealous bastard.

he stays buried like that for a second, letting you feel every inch of his dick buried in your cunt. and before you can react, he starts thrusting into your pussy again, fast and merciless.

your voice cracks. “and…and demanded an audience with the queen—hahhhhh!” each syllable comes out shaky, interrupted by the wet slap of skin on skin and the filthy squelch of your sopping cunt taking him so well. he leans over you, chest pressed to your back, breath hot on your neck.

“louder,” he says, biting your shoulder. “i want to hear every fucking word, babycakes.”

you try again, voice hoarse. “the queen mnghh…she r-rose from her seat—oh my gooooddd!” he slams in so hard your hips lift off the bed for a second, then drops you back down, cock driving straight into that spot that makes your vision white out.

your walls flutter around him, close to breaking, but he doesn’t slow down, just keeps fucking you like some sex-deprived maniac.

“good fuckin' girl,” he pants, fucking you through it. “don’t stop until i fill you up, 'mkay? come on baby, i'm almost there.”

you choke out the next line, tears stinging your eyes from the overwhelming stretch and his relentless thrusts. the book trembles in your hands, pages crinkling so hard the page might just tear clean off.

but you keep forcing the words out between gasps and moans, your boyfriend’s cock pounding into you without mercy, making sure you don’t miss a single syllable.

his thrusts turn erratic, hips stuttering as his grip tightens in your hair. “fuuuuuck—i’m close,” he groans, voice strained. “mmmm, gonna cum deep in your cunt baby, just wait a nghh, second.”

your voice breaks completely as you force out the final words, each one punched out by the force of his cock driving into your cunt. “the queen…s-she…sshe accepteeedddd” your sentence dissolves into a moan. your lips fall open in a silent cry, eyes rolling to the back of your head as your orgasm crashes through you, pussy clenching and pulsing around his thick length, soaking the sheets beneath you.

he feels you cum and loses it, slamming in one last time and burying himself to the hilt. his cock throbs hard as he fills you up, hot cum flooding your cunt in thick spurts while he grinds against your ass, groaning your name into your shoulder. his hips jerk with each pulse, pushing his load deeper until it starts leaking out around his cock.

he collapses onto you, lips buried in the crook of your neck. he's breathing heavily, his cock slowly softening inside your hole. there's a moment of silence, filled with the sounds of heavy breathing and the smell of sex.

"mm, sweets?" he mutters, grinning against your skin.

"mm?" you hum.

"you've drooled all over your book."

THIS IS SO ASS WHAT THE HELLY😭

2026 ── 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗸 𝗼𝗳 @atelphobist

© of atelphobist on tumblr. no stealing, posting on other platforms or feeding my work to ai.

The Feeling | Peter Parker x Psychometric!Fem!Reader

SUMMARY: After you move in across the hall from Peter Parker, the boy you loved before you lost your memories, Peter decides he can’t take it anymore. He wants you to remember. Late night at a college party, a guy accidentally bumps into you, spilling his drink all over you. Under any normal circumstance, you would’ve brushed it off…but your powers are triggered a suddenly you remember that this isn’t just any guy. He isn’t just your neighbor. He is, or rather was, your boyfriend.

WARNINGS: Reader has psychometric abilities (she can touch certain objects or people and see into the past), some angst, Peter yearning big time, happy ending!

A/N: Don’t worry, there are absolutely no spoilers for BND, I’m going to see it Friday! So, here’s one last post before I go off the grid for BND :)

WC: 5.3K

Peter Parker’s soul had been fractured some time ago and he craved a feeling that he believed to be the remedy.

What that feeling was, his mind wasn’t so sure, but his heart and soul knew.

Hierarchy of people you know

1. Mutuals

2. Friends

3. Coworkers you like

4. Strangers

5. Coworkers you don’t like

6. Enemies

7. Friend’s ugly boyfriend

why does the wikipedia page for paranoid personality disorder have some kind of goblin on it

Truthfully, this is your boyfriends fault. That's exactly what you plan to tell him when he gets home.

Because how the hell were you supposed to know his work buddy regularly breaks into his apartment?!

"Fuckin' hell, good swing, kid." Simon slumps over your kitchen sink, nose steadily leaking blood into the basin. Simon, Kyle's friend whom you've met once. "Next time, don't hesitate on a second swing."

"What the hell!" You hiss, shock draining way to pure indignation. You grab his jaw and forcefully lift the balaclava up properly to assess the broken nose "what the fuck were you even doing in here?!"

"Needed a snack." This giant of a man grunts, shrugs his shoulders as if breaking into his friends apartments for a snack is a reasonable course of action.

"Yeah, well now you need the hospital, dumbass." You frown, fishing your phone out of your pocket and shoving ghost to lean back over the seat. You miss the blush that spreads across his face from the rough handling.

You're sure ghost only stayed in the car so he could hear you tear gaz a new one for not warning you about his insane friends. He does try to escape once you actually park, which simply leaves you dragging him in by the ear.

Afterwards, you give ghost a set of keys "if you need something, you text me or kyle in advance and you use the damn door."

You don't care what sort of shenanigans your boyfriend and his boy toy get up to, but you draw the line at interrupting your sleep schedule.

there's a bug in my room and I would like to dedicate this post to the bug in my room. I love you bug

Today I want to show you a very special painting.This place is part of my childhood and some of my happiest memories. I painted it after a trip to Russia in 2017. It feels like a lifetime ago. My oldest son had just turned one, and my husband and I traveled to visit my parents.My parents have a big off-road vehicle, and they love exploring places where ordinary cars simply can’t go-deep forests, marshes, hidden lakes, and quiet rivers. They took us on many adventures, and this was one of those places. We spent the day fishing there and even caught a few large northern pike.This landscape is near the village of Kholuy in the Ivanovo region of Russia.Although I painted it years ago, it isn’t for sale. It is the only painting that was permanently damaged during the catastrophic flood that hit my gallery in 2021, After days of heavy rain in Belgium and Germany, a dam had to be opened overnight to prevent an even greater disaster. Nobody had time to prepare. During the night, the water rushed into the building. The flood reached almost 2.5 meters (over 8 feet) high, nearly touching the ceiling. My paintings floated in muddy water for many hours.Afterward, I washed and disinfected every painting by hand. Many survived surprisingly well, although several wooden stretcher bars warped as they dried. This painting was less fortunate. It must have fallen in just the wrong way, and part of the thick acrylic paint layer detached from the canvas. It now has a small but visible scar, and I still don’t know the best way to restore it.So it hangs in my home instead.People often ask whether it’s okay to touch my textured paintings. I always say yes you can gently touch them with your fingers or even wipe them with a damp cloth if needed. After seeing paintings survive a flood, floating in dirty water for hours, it’s hard for me to imagine that even thousands of curious fingers could do more damage than that one night did.

Sometimes a painting carries not only the memory of the place it depicts, but also the memory of everything it has survived.

acrylic, linen 100 * 120 cm “balance” 2019

in spider-man 2 when spider-man is trying to stop the train from crashing, the first thing he tries is stopping the train with his feet pressed against the track, but all that does is break up the wood planks on the track without slowing the train down at all. when spider-man gets up to rethink his approach -- already exhausted and agonized from his fight with Doc Ock before he even blew out his knees on the tracks, dealing with his Aunt May getting evicted on top of his own poverty, having literally JUST pushed the woman he loves and who loves him away again, and now feeling the enormous pressure of the lives of everyone behind him being at stake unless he thinks fast --

an old man behind him says "You got any more bright ideas?" and there's a split second where spider-man just looks at him like this

Protect California's coasts!

No matter where you live, you can speak up and take action now to protect the coast of California from offshore drilling.

The Trump administration's plan for new offshore oil and gas drilling in federal waters is expected any day. If finalized, drilling could begin off the California coast as soon as next year.

We need you—our Aquarium Tumblr community—to act right now.

📣 California residents: Tell your lawmakers to vote YES on AB 1448—closing loopholes that let old infrastructure fuel new drilling. Submit by August 3.

📣 Everyone: Tell NOAA to keep California's coastal protections strong. NOAA needs to hear from everyone who loves the California coast, no matter where you live. Public comments are due August 22.

Our coast can't wait. Take action now:

is there anyone willing to protect me? with a sword?

I have a sword, I can protect myself

but um. is anyone willing to protect me? with their sword 🥺 or you can borrow one of my swords, if you don't have one. and protect me?

"I have like...a really big crush on you."

Zayne can't help but smile at your words, even if they're a bit jumbled as you lean against him, trying and failing to kick off your heels.

Clearly, you'd had a few more drinks than you said you would.

"Good to know." He bends to help you slip the shoes off, then picks you up so they won't hurt too bad. You giggle immediately as his actions, resting your head on his shoulder as you cling to him.

"Do you have a crush on me?" You hold on a little tighter as he ascends the stairs, more focused on the conversation than whether or not you'll fall.

"I would say it's more than a crush." His words make you grin, and he's glad to be off the stairs, because his heart immediately stutters at the sight.

"Does that mean you love me?" He sits you on the bed, carefully helping you out of the stunning yet restrictive outfit you'd donned for the night. Of course, he makes a mental note to ask you to wear it again.

"I do."

Another smile. God, his heart can barely take this.

"That's sweet. I really love you, did you know that? Sometimes I don't know what to do with it all." Your tone drifts off, so Zayne pauses his actions.

"What do you mean?" He isn't really expecting a coherent answer, so he's taken off guard when you meet his eyes with seriousness.

"I love you so much that when I can't give it all to you, it hurts me to keep it inside." Something in him wells up at that, squeezing your hand carefully.

"You can give it to me. I'd love nothing more than to take it. As long as I can give my love to you too. Okay?"

"Okay."

I try my best to be optimistic for the future because I don't think I'll gain anything of benefit from being pessimistic

Hey, don't kill yourself. We gotta be alive in 2061

This is so fucking funny.

“I couldn’t possibly be mansplaining. You probably don’t even know what mansplaining is. If you would consult the chart. Which I made to teach you something you couldn’t possibly know better than me. Hashtag transandrophobia”

I think I was well-served in the long run by having already come to terms with being a freak and an outcast many, many years before I came out as a transsexual.

I heard all these horror stories like "You'll have a hard time finding a job and everyone will think you're a big weirdo and you'll be subject to a panopticon of social scrutiny and face violent bigotry" and I had thought Well all of that stuff is already happening to me anyways so why not, you'll hang for a sheep as well as a lamb

It's really really deeply evil how much labour people can force out of trans women by convincing us we need to atone for some "male socialisation" or something.

I constantly find myself feeling like I need to do heaps and heaps of housework (even when staying with other people) partly out of the feeling that I'm making up for something/proving I'm a woman, and then realising "hey wait a minute, I'm a woman doing the fucking dishes for a man" and getting really really fucking mad. (but obviously they're never going to do it anyway).

sometimes that character just wouldn’t hide an injury. it’s a great trope but only if they would do that.

turns out reaping what you sow is great when you plant epic and awesomesauce seeds and not yucky gross ones

I work at a pizza place canonically now. I makea the pizza 🤌

thinking about how Mew Mew Kissy Cutie in Undertale/Deltarune's universe is a copyrighted anime property. we've never met the "real" Mew Mew because there isn't one. she's a branded fictional character from an in-universe anime. both Mad Mew Mew from Undertale and Pink from Deltarune are NOT Mew Mew, they are at best abstractions or imitations of Mew Mew as interpreted by Maddie/Pink. even the darkner that spawns from Pink's body is not *actually* Mew Mew, it's just the flower shop dark world's interpretation of how a Mew Mew doll would act once given consciousness. I feel like it connects to Deltarune's deeper themes of narratives deriving from other narratives. Deltarune the game IS the legend IS Lord of the Hammer IS Dragon Blazers, and meanwhile they're all very different. A copy of a copy of a copy of a copy. Pink both IS and IS NOT Mew Mew. Mew Mew doesn't technically exist within Deltarune's world, we only vaguely know about the "real" Mew Mew as an in-universe character because these derivatives of her exist. we never watch Mew Mew Kissy Cutie, we just hear Alphys talk about it. a story told about a story we never get to see. every retelling slightly different. play with me in this space.

I hate Joe Exotic but this exchange reset my brain

⤷ ゛ despite the fact that sukuna certainly had your attention now, you were still determined to do your job as a lifeguard. that didn’t stop sukuna from trying to catch your attention again, though, in his own selfish way. part 2 to this. ˎˊ˗
contents. sukuna x fem reader | beach lifeguard!reader | sukuna naturally having no regard for public opinion and safety

you sat in your lifeguard chair, sunglasses on, scanning the water with familiar precision. the beach was moderately busy— families, couples, a few teenagers trying to look cool. everything was calm and under control.

then you heard the low rumble of an engine, a little too loud, a little too showy. you didn’t need to look to know who it was. you’d recognize that sound anywhere now. the beat-up old chevelle that sukuna had rebuilt with his own hands, its paint job a patchwork of primer and glossy red.

you kept your eyes forward, jaw set. don’t look. don’t give him the satisfaction.

“hey, beautiful.” you heard about 5 minutes later.

his voice drifted up from below, smooth as oil. you could picture him perfectly without even glancing down— leaning against your lifeguard stand with that infuriating smirk, his white tank top doing absolutely nothing to hide the lines of muscle beneath.

you continued scanning the water.

“i know you can hear me,” he called up. “come on. it’s hot as hell. come down and let me buy you a snow cone.”

“i’m working, sukuna.”

“it’s a slow day. no one’s dying.”

you finally allowed yourself a glance down. he was exactly as you’d imagined; smirking, arms crossed, sunglasses pushed up into his pinkish hair. he was holding a paper cup with a straw, condensation dripping down the sides. a sweet treat for a trap.

“nice try,” you said, turning back to the ocean. “i’m not leaving my post.”

he clicked his tongue, feigning disappointment. “you’re so stubborn. it’s one of your best qualities, you know.”

“and you’re a distraction.”

“if you say so,” he shrugged, taking a loud, obnoxious sip from the snow cone. “now come down here and taste this. it’s cherry. your favorite.”

your stomach did a traitorous little flip. it was cute that he remembered your order.

you gripped the armrests of your chair a little tighter. “i can’t. i’m working.”

“you’ve been up there for hours, pretty girl,” he pressed, stepping closer to the ladder. “what if i told you i missed you? what if i told you i drove all the way from the shop just to see your pretty face for five minutes?”

“you drove from the shop because it’s a ten-minute ride from the beach and you know it, asshole.”

he laughed out a low, genuine sound that always made your resolve soften just a fraction. “you got me. but i still missed you.”

you bit the inside of your cheek. he was relentless. he’d been like this ever since that first date, showing up whenever he could. sometimes with food, sometimes with some excuse about “just passing by,” sometimes just to stand there and look at you until you caved. creep.

and you did cave. sometimes. he was a charming man after all. you were weak, even weaker when he flashed you that smirk of his.

but not today. today you were strong.

“sukuna, i’m serious. go back to work. i’ll call you when my shift ends.”

he let out a sigh, rolling his eyes at you. “i was about to offer you something even better than a snow cone.”

you arched an eyebrow, already suspicious. “what?”

“come down here and i’ll show you.”

“absolutely not.”

“scared?”

“fuck you,” you scowled at him..

he grinned, slow and wolfish. “i could climb up there, you know. make it worth your while.”

your face flushed, and you were grateful for your bigsunglasses hiding the evidence. “you wouldn’t dare.”

“you sure about that?”

he grabbed the first rung of the ladder and your heart jumped into your throat.

“sukuna! i will kick you in the face!”

he paused, looking up at you with mock innocence. “really?”

“do not—do not—come up here. this is a public beach. there are children.”

he glanced around pointedly. “i don’t see any children. i see a very attractive lifeguard who looks like she could use a break.”

“i don’t need a break.”

“that’s right, you need a kiss.”

“i don’t—”

“you need my kiss,” he continued, as if you hadn’t spoken. “i’ve been thinking about it all morning. your mouth. the way you taste. the little sound you make when i—”

“sukuna.”

he was already climbing. two rungs up, then three, his grin widening as you scrambled to your feet in your tiny chair, clutching your whistle like a weapon.

“get back down, you animal.”

“make me.”

he reached the top, his face level with your thighs. and then he was in your space, one hand gripping the edge of the chair, the other reaching for your hip.

“this is highly inappropriate,” you hissed, even as your body betrayed you, leaning slightly toward him.

“then tell me to stop one more time. maybe i’ll listen.”

you didn’t.

he tugged you closer, his mouth finding yours. it was easy to forget where you were, when he was kissing you like that; hungry mouth consuming yours, bitting your lips gently, sucking on them one by one and taking his sweet time. one of his hands slid down your back, fingers grazing the waistband of your swimsuit, thumb pressing into the curve of your hip.

“someone could see,” you murmured against his lips, arms twitching to pull him closer.

“let ‘em, baby.”

his hand dipped lower, palm cupping your ass with zero shame. you gasped into his mouth, half scandalized, half aching for more.

“suku—”

“just a quick one,” he breathed, nipping at your lower lip. “i’ve been good. i’ve been so good. i’ve been patient. haven’t i been patient?”

“you’ve certainly been annoying.”

“i don’t see you resisting much.” his hand squeezed, completely enjoying himslef. “still letting me touch you. still making those little sounds i like.”

you smacked his chest weakly. “shut it.”

“i know a way.”

he kissed you again, deeper this time, and you felt yourself sinking into it. his other hand came up to cup your jaw, tilting your head just the way he knew you liked.

you were so lost in it that you almost didn’t hear the whistle. a sharp, shrill blast cut through the air.

you jerked back, heart pounding, and whirled around. a girl in a yellow bikini was waving frantically from the shore, pointing at the water.

“lifeguard! help! my boyfriend’s cramping!”

shit.

you shoved sukuna’s chest, hard. “move. now.”

he stumbled back onto the ladder, nearly losing his grip, but you were already sliding down past him, feet hitting the sand. you took off at a sprint, your instincts kicking in.

sukuna watched you go, still grinning, lips buzzing from the kiss. he leaned against the lifeguard stand, arms crossed, completely unbothered.

“same time tomorrow?” he called after you.

you didn’t answer, flipping him off, but he saw the way your shoulders shook with a laugh as you ran toward the water.

he’d take that as a yes.

watched monsters university again i want to marry the dean

i cant order sex toys because this will happen to me and me only

I do hate when politicians do something shady and ask for privacy. You are a public figure. You are not some guy who had a video randomly go viral or an actor trying to make a living and have some semblance of a life outside. You are a politician. You mudslung, campaigned, fearmongered and lied your way to the top. This was a choice you made, you wanted to make decisions for us. And noe you’re begging for privacy while your 85 year old body gives out on you during your term in congress or your wife divorces you for cheating on her or you got a DUI in your new sports car? Nuh uh uhhhhhh.

Alternate timeline in which all Greek and Latin roots are swapped:

catastrophe -> contraverse cephalopod -> capitoped chlorophyll -> viridofolia democracy -> populimpery homicide -> anthropoctony homosexual -> equigamic kilometer -> millimensure interregnum -> mesarchy magnanimous -> megapsychic manuscript -> chirography motorcycle -> ergatorote microscope -> parvovisor oxygen -> acidofex polyamory -> multierasty television -> remotoscope universe -> monostrophe

august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good august will be good

when people say "death to america" they mean they want the communist death army to storm every city in america and kill everyone there including babies and old people and animals too and then they are going to take a bunch of bulldozers and dynamite and such and demolish all of the buildings and trees and mountains and everything until the entire country is just a smoldering crater. just wanted to clear that up

guy on a work call just accidentally said “have a nice freak-end” instead of weekend and now i desperately want that to be the new meme. have a nice freakend everybody

Anonymous asked:

I’ve been meaning to ask this for a while and I am sorry if it comes off oddly. How do you navigate an intelligence gap in a relationships? I have dated men of equivalent or greater intellect and found them inadequate in other ways, but when I have dated men less intelligent than me I become frustrated with them and their insecurities bleed into the relationship. You and Ship (or the personas you perform publicly) seem content. How do you avoid getting frustrated? [cont.]

"[part 2] I mean no insult to Ship of course. They seem very attentive and I used to really enjoy their detective skits. From the contents of your blogs they come across as so much less intellectually curious that it surprises me that you are compatible. Do you get adequate intellectual stimulation from other relationships/is that not a need for you in a partner/are my standards unrealistic?"

i have no idea how to respond to this. we have all been in absolutely helpless hysterics about it for the last thirty minutes. this is by far the most deranged ask I have received about my personal life on this website in my fifteen year career on here, and that is saying quite a lot

i can't decide which part of this message is my favorite, but if I HAD to say, probably the part where you appear to be entirely in earnest about this? in almost any other case I would assume a message like this was an elaborate way of insulting me or my partner or both, but I really genuinely don't think that's the case for you, which is actually MORE confusing. its just so compelling. there's so many layers here. i want to hire someone to cross stitch this for me so I can hang it in our living room. i can hear ship intermittently breaking out in peals of hysterical laughter in the kitchen

I think that if you lose an arm and get fitted for a prosthetic u should get to refer to your prosthetist as your arms dealer

espresso martini: don’t drink me so fast… savor me. why are you in such hurry

me: oh i didnt know you were down to earth like that… my bad

IDK it pisses me off the way people act like murderers are some sort of great puzzle to be solved when 90% of the time its literally just a boring freak that hates women

⋆ ˚。⋆౨ৎ˚ JACK ABBOT who... cannot wrap his brain around the fact that you're insecure.

CONTAINS: 18+ MDNI, 3.1k words, unprotected p in v sex, insecure!reader, curvy/plus size!reader, discussions of insecurity and food intake, ass man!jack abbot supremacy, spanking, brief mentions of jack's prosthetic/crutches, not proofread! divider from the beautiful @robinavitchslut⋆ ˚。⋆౨ৎ˚

It starts after a rich, full dinner. You're stumbling across his threshold together, slightly tipsy off of what seemed like bottomless wine. Jack's lips are on yours in an instant, a large, rugged hand cupping your cheek, pulling your face to meet his.

You melt into him, like you always do, though flashes of the night keep echoing through your brain. The bloat in your tummy, the waitress who's eyes lingered on Jack for too long.

Suddenly, your dress feels too tight, Jack's roaming hands like little taunts over your plush skin. Not thin enough, not pretty enough, not good enough.

You're not an idiot, you see the way women look at Jack, the confused looks that always follow when you tell them that no, you are not his daughter. The logical part of your mind assumes the confusion is born of your age gap.

The rest of yourself is not so kind.

Wiggling out of his grasp, your heart clutches at his little pout. You pinch his cheek, stomach lurching at his hungry eyes.

"I just have to use the bathroom, I'll be right back, okay?" You whisper, desperate to hide any emotion in your voice.

"Okay," he mumbles as you walk past. "Don't take too long, I'll miss ya."

simon has an ex wife, he doesn’t talk about her at all, the only one who knows about her is price. the rest of the team don’t even know he has one. it was something, something that left him only with a scratched pair of rings that he wears around his neck, and a photo of a sweet young woman holding a small baby between his books. not that he lets anyone see. not even price.

the new translator who comes to base cam’s head office, with her bright eyes and easy smile, and puts her child in the kindergarten. johnny loves her, when she makes his blue eyes crinkle in laughter. gaz has taken a liking to her and her toddler, since his room is next to hers, always bringing the two of them little treats from the mess. price who puts a large arm around her, always helping her out with being new. his office is right next to hers, and if she wants anything she just “ask.” he’s also giving her daughter, violet, piggyback rides.

ghost comes back from a mission, the past two months in deep cover. and price thumps his shoulder, “c’mon lad, there’s this lovely lass on base i’d like you to meet.”

and when he sees you, his heart crumbles into a thousand tiny shards.

three years ago you’d called it quits with your secondary school sweetheart for his emotional absence.

ghost looks at you, and then at the startling yet familiar brown of his daughter’s eyes.

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Posted: 20:45 UTC 31 July, 2026

Even folks on the pro-porn side of the aisle often talk like it's the presence of narrative that makes porn an art form, as though the erotic needs to be explicitly justified in order to elevate it from the mere mechanical production of arousal, and it always makes me feel like maybe we're not quite as "pro" as we think we are.

help me solve an argument

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Legalizing copyright infringement would be dismantling one of the few limitations on the white urge to steal from Black Art and Black Artists. The practical application of it would be anti-Black as fuck

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this argument makes so many assumptions that I disagree with that I don't know where to start

because i don’t want to be in anyone’s arms but yours.

your ex boyfriend, sukuna is used to you patching him after games—with you no longer in his life, he can feel his skin start to crawl with you so out of reach. that is until his nephew, yuji, decides to give you a call. ⸝⸝ art :: @/679sinner ⸝⸝ cw :: panic attacks

sukuna could feel his heart trying to thump out of his chest while the referee raised his arm to declare his win. he'd won, again and again, time after time, so why'd it feel so worthless now? he could feel the cut on his lip, the taste of blood lingering on his tongue while a sense of dread settled in his stomach.

because this time around, it wouldn't be a familiar pair of arms cupping his face, it wouldn't be you gently trying to dress his wounds, it'd have to be a blur of different medics and nurses taking care of him. and the very thought had his stomach lurching.

the scent of iodine hit him first—something he never paid attention to while he rushed in the medic's ward, he was used to making a beeline towards you, with his head immediately resting in the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent until his mind finally clears. sukuna ryomen no longer had that privilege.

in a past life i was the ballistic gel torso they bring out on stuff like knife or death or mythbusters. to cut the questions off at the pass, yes it's still a past life even though i was born before my life as the ballistic gel torso, and continue to live well past the end of my life as the ballistic gel torso, and also yes, it was sexual

I'm going to go to sleep in my bed for 400 hours

I was trying to figure out where my fetish for medieval-style public executions comes from, because that is SO SPECIFIC!!! like, it has to have been embedded from an external source! and today I finally figured it out, and......

I don't want to talk about it. it's from seeing this as a kid. this is why.

you’re jerking off and suddenly my leitmotif starts playing

In case you weren't aware, the goal of a boycott is to significantly impact the bottom line of a business to pressure it into stopping some specific harmful behavior.

This means that a disorganized "don't support this" with no clear timeframe, no clear demand being put forward, and no organized effort to reach the actual customers of the business... is pretty unlikely to achieve anything.

AI companies are going public now because the AI bubble is about to burst. They want suckers to buy stock right now before it is worth absolutely nothing. There have been whispers of companies attempting to sell their data centers and I’m inclined to believe the rumors. They have been trying so hard to market AI because they know it sucks ass.

weird that this is happening all across the usa at the same time. oh well. probably doesn't mean anything.

I love it so much when people tag reblogs with character names, either because the post reminded them of a character, or the post is something that they think the character would say. I really love it when people get super into characters they like, it's wholesome and fun and awesome

MAKE or BREAK (yourself)

I’ve had this thought in my head for a long while now that, after the Roaring/Final Tragedy, the latter half of chapter seven would feature the characters breaking the game itself and travelling through chapters in order to write a new ending and save Kris (and perhaps Dess by extension). 

And after chapter five’s weird route ended with Kris and Noelle breaking the game in another way, I then had the thought… “Well…what if these two Noelles crossed paths?”

Alt text for this comic under the read more:

basically every ask i get is one of these three questions. don't know don't know not my business

mario sunshine is coming to nso in august and i cant wait for a whole new generation of people to play it and realize that this game was designed by the actual devil

Telling someone to play a gacha game should be considered as gauche as telling them to start smoking and i'm not kidding.

There is a downside to having a job that largely involves standing perfectly still and silent without distraction for multiple hours on end and I think a big one for me is confirmation that staying up too late / having an injury / getbeing stressed etc. does ABSOLUTELY make u stupid

you have to build the life you so desperately want btw. no one will do it for you

deliberate level of information

Story-driven roguelike where you actually resolve the central problem with no contrived shooting-our-own-themes-in-the-foot excuse for why you just keep iterating on it forever after the credits roll, and any runs after that are framed as PTSD dreams about all the shit the protagonist went through.

Nekomata can kick ass, even without her legs on!

This is the last day I'm legally allowed to post this since it's end of Disability Pride Month. Hope you enjoy!

I always thought her legs were prosthetic cause they're quite thin and look a lot like Lycaon's prosthetics. She also stores her swords in them, which is badass!!

you couldn't take my ass on dungeon crawls because i'd always be climbing into the spike pits to get a closer look at the rotting corpses impaled on them

I’m currently on temporary unemployment benefits due to my job being closed for the summer so despite having a job waiting for me I still had to go see a lady about job prospects and my plans for the future.

She looked at my files and said “So…what are your plans?”

“My plans?” I asked.

“Yes. You’re a dishwasher. You don’t want to do that forever, do you?”

“Maybe not, but I’m happy with it right now. It pays surprisingly well, I never have to work weekends or overtime, and it’s the sort of job I don’t have to bring with me home mentally. It frees up a lot of time to do the things I like”

“Like what?”

“Hobbies, my family, friends, my pets. I don’t want to hate my job but I don’t want it to be my whole life either, eating away at the things that give my life meaning”

She looked at me for a few seconds then said “You know…the older I get I understand that mindset more and more”

And then she went into a very long, very personal rant about how she has started feeling like she wasted her life on high demand jobs and how taxing and mentally draining her current job is because she has to make huge decisions that can ruin people’s lives and how do you not take that home with you? She loved drawing too but she hadn’t picked up a pen in years and-

So the conversation went from “Your life must be a bit shit with a job like that” to “Oh my god my job is shit and I’ve wasted my life on it!”

I felt like I was the inciting incident in one of those lifetime movies about a woman quitting her job and moving back to her home town to make up for lost time. I hope she’s doing well.

FireLord Zuko is still the ‘Jealous Type’

-–—•

The royal banquet was loud. Too loud.

Ministers laughed over overflowing cups of tea, nobles exchanged stories from distant provinces, and musicians filled the palace with melodies Zuko barely heard. His attention had wandered long ago. It rested on you.

You stood among a small circle of guests, smiling politely as one of the younger Fire Nation generals spoke a little too enthusiastically. Whatever story he was telling had earned your laughter, and Zuko watched the man's expression brighten at the sound.

His jaw tightened. It wasn't jealousy…at least, that's what he tried to tell himself. He trusted you completely, it was everyone else he didn't trust. The general leaned closer - not enough to be improper. Just enough.

Zuko's fingers tightened around the porcelain teacup in his hand. Across the room, Sokka noticed immediately. The smirk tugging at his lips was impossible to miss.

Aang followed his gaze before quietly shaking his head, already recognizing the familiar look settling across his friend's face. Without another thought, Zuko excused himself from the ministers surrounding him.

The conversation continued behind him. He didn't hear a word of it. Your smile softened the moment you noticed him approaching. Without hesitation, you stepped away from the gathering. The general paused, watching with poorly hidden disappointment as you drifted toward your husband instead. Zuko stopped beside you.

For a heartbeat, he simply looked at you. Then, as naturally as breathing, he reached for your hand. His thumb brushed absentmindedly across your knuckles before he intertwined your fingers with his. He never looked away from you. The gesture was subtle. Quiet. Yet unmistakably possessive. Not a claim born from distrust. A reminder; she was his.

Your lips curved into the smallest smile, as though you understood exactly what had prompted the sudden affection. Rather than tease him, you gently leaned against his shoulder. The tiny movement unraveled every knot in his chest. The tension disappeared almost instantly. His shoulders relaxed - his grip softened. He was no longer that hotheaded teenager who would quite literally throw someone out the window for having a small glance at you; but gosh he would still very much love to do that.

Across the hall, Sokka failed spectacularly at hiding his laughter. Katara elbowed him before he could say anything, though the smile she wore suggested she found the entire scene just as amusing. Aang simply chuckled into his tea. Classic Zuko. The FireLord remained blissfully unaware - or perhaps...he simply didn't care. His attention was occupied elsewhere. You. As the musicians began another song, you gave his hand a small squeeze.

“No need to throw anyone dear” you softly whisper to your husband.

“No? Well I’d very much like too” he quietly replies while sipping on his tea. Laughter heard from you.

Zuko glanced down at your intertwined fingers before looking back at you. The corners of his mouth lifted into the smile reserved for no one else. Warm. Soft. Entirely unguarded. The banquet continued around you, filled with conversation, politics, and celebration.

Yet Zuko scarcely noticed because in a room crowded with nobles, generals, and ministers, there was only one person he ever found himself searching for; and now that he'd found you... He had no intention of letting go.

-–—•

“BOY LET ME KNOW IF THIS IS CARELESS I”- hehe anyways, the movie is officially out!

Eridians, on average, are 50 cm (19.7") tall. Adrian is a tall Eridian, they're huge! They're the equivalent of a 6'5" (195.5cm) human being!

Rocky, however, is shown in the movie to be closer to 80 cm (31.5"). This is astronomically large. This is the equivalent of an alien's first contact with humanity being a guy who's casually NINE FOOT ONE (280cm).

Anyway, this is my "Eridian Height Chart", enjoy.

Anonymous asked:

I got banned from your discord server cus I offered to teach someone to make an explosive.

yeah you were. what did you think would happen

Just had a dream of a shape shifter trying to find the next body so they hold a character design contest and the winner’s oc becomes real

Israel is now using Napalm-filled missiles in Gaza - a gel that sticks to bodies and burns at extreme temperatures. Don't look It's scary

Nothing signifies a "ceasefire" like missiles that release toxic and incendiary gases. I think "ceasefire" means something different there than here... What pigs! They saw it was too hot and the temperature was too high, So they’re bombing us with rockets that secreted spontaneous gases. Damn