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there’s a used bookstore in rural western massachusetts (the montague book mill) whose motto is “books you don’t need in a place you can’t find” and i just feel like that summarizes tumblr too

Maybe if I just work harder, this empty cup will pour again

jellyfish have to be kept in a round tank because if they're in a tank with corners they'll get stuck in them. I think that's beautiful. god's stupidest little plastic bags (affectionate)

Bruce, texting the family group chat: Bad news.
Bruce: After thirty-six years, the Batcave fridge finally died.
Bruce: Been through a lot together. Outlasted three Robins, two Batmen.
Bruce: Went out quiet, like a shadow.
Bruce: Must've kept ten thousand patrol snacks cold.
Bruce: Thinking about giving it a proper funeral.
Your soulmate is not someone that comes into your life peacefully. It is someone who comes to make you question things, who changes your reality, somebody that marks a before and after in your life. It is not the human being everyone has idealized but an ordinary person, who manages to revolutionize your world in a second.

Unknown

Text I got from my guy friend who’s currently dating a man for the first time when I asked him how it’s going

as much as i get the sentiment behind "make more bad art" there's gotta be a better way of communicating "you don't have to be technically proficient or hold yourself to a specific standard of practice" that doesn't sound as backhanded lol

some advice for people entering their 20s:

-dont go to the emergency room with dental problems. go to the dentist

-bagged greens are cheaper than pre-made salads

-taco bell is NOT worth the money anymore. 1/4 cup mayo, 1/4 cup sour cream, 3 tblspoons pickled jalapenos+2tblspoons of the jar liquid, 2 tsp paprika 1 tsp cumin 1 tsp garlic powder 1 tsp onion powder salt+pepper. all in your blender. creamy jalapeno sauce

-dont quit your job unless you have a bunch of job interviews lined up immediately after

-use resources. food bank, unemployment, housing assistance, financial aid, etc. yes there will be paperwork. but Do It

-dont stay awake longer than 20 hours. you Will start to become impulsive and cranky. resting for 20 minutes is better than trying to stay awake

-for every 2 hours you spend looking up close at screens, spend 20 minutes looking at something far away from you. stretch your wrists a lot

-dont do that yoga stretch where you roll your head around your shoulders. youre grinding down the joints in your neck

-be nice to your friends, bullying them as a joke gets old. if you need a ride somewhere at least offer them gas money

-brush your teeth at any time of the day but especially before you sleep. dont snack in bed if you can help it. make your bed the Clean Teeth Zone. keep floss picks by your bed

-dont tell your boss youre adhd/autism/depression/suicidal. dont trust your coworkers with that. you NEVER know how people will take it and its none of their business

-train your pets to go to the front door when they hear a fire alarm

-get regular oil changes

Bruce sits down.
Squishes on his seat a bit.
Bruce: why is my pants wet?
Jason, sneering: ew. Maybe it’s time to roll out the diapers old man.
Bruce standing, lifts up a squished juice pouch. Darts his eyes to Dick beside him. Dick quickly rebounds as he turns away.
Dick, calling into the house: Dami! Jon! What’d I say about leaving your juice boxes everywhere!
Bruce: Dick.
Bruce: they’ve been at Clark’s since yesterday.
Dick:
Dick: dammit.