Black Mesa by SandySha

Word Count 3,191

The usual disclaimers.  I don’t own them.  I wish I did. 
                     Happy 50^th Anniversary Lancer.
** Thanks to Alice Marie and Susan for doing the Beta.

Episode tag: Chase A Wild Horse

2nd in the Taming A Wild Horse

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Standing in front of the hacienda, Murdoch nervously looked toward the arch.   Taking out his pocket watch, he looked at the time and then snapped the cover shut.  It was 12:30, and still, the men hadn’t come in for lunch.

It had been two weeks since the incident with Sam Stryker.  Two weeks since Murdoch had ridden back from town with Johnny by his side.  He’d hoped it was a good two weeks for his son.  He’d tried hard to make it a good two weeks.

He’d pushed Johnny hard those first two months, believing that by pushing, he would drive the wildness out of the boy. 

What had he said that day in his study? “You have to make up your mind who you are and where you belong and if it’s not going to be here, I want to know it now.”

What a fool he’d been.  He’d been demanding Johnny leave his past and Madrid behind him. In his mind, he was taming his wild son.  He was so wrong.  What he had done was shove the boy right out the front door and off of Lancer.

The day he’d met Johnny in the saloon, he realized there was no separating Johnny Lancer from Johnny Madrid.   He was going to have to accept both as his son, or neither.   If he couldn’t bend, he’d lose his son forever.

For the past two weeks, he’d been trying to get along with his son.  He could tell Johnny was also trying.  They hadn’t had a major blow-up since that day.  He knew the truce wouldn’t last forever, but that was alright.  He had his son home now and planned on keeping him.

Deep down, there was always the fear Johnny would ride out with a work crew one morning and decide not to come home, or he’d grab his saddlebags and ride away. 

For the last few days, both he and Scott had seen the warning signs.  Johnny was growing restless again.  

Movement on the road caught his attention.  Frank’s work crew was returning and Murdoch knew he wouldn’t breathe easy until he saw Johnny riding with them.  Anxiously watching the hands getting closer, his heart skipped a beat when there was no sign of the golden palomino he’d expected to see.   

As the men dismounted and started to line up for noon chow, he looked once more towards the arch.

“Frank!” Murdoch drew the man’s attention.

Frank turned to see his boss walking towards him.  

“Boss?”

“I thought Johnny would be with you.” Murdoch hoped his voice didn’t reflect the anxiety he was feeling. “Where is he?”

“He’s stayed out there, Mr. Lancer.  Said he wasn’t hungry and for the rest of us to come on back.  We left him still digging post holes.” 

“He was alright, wasn’t he?   I mean…”  Murdoch’s voice now revealing his concerns.

Frank gave him a knowing smile. “Yes, sir.  He’s alright.”

Murdoch relaxed and returned the smile.  

There were no secrets on a ranch the size of Lancer.  He was aware all the hands knew what happened between Johnny and the Strykers.  How could they not with Walt still recuperating in the bunkhouse from the bullet Davey Stryker put in him?  They’d also witnessed Murdoch bringing his son home the day the Stryker’s laid siege to Lancer.

Turning around, he went to his horse.  Just to reassure himself, he was going to ride out and check to make sure Johnny was still there.  Mounting up, Murdoch reined the horse around and headed out to where Johnny was working.

In the distance, he saw a cloud of dust and pulled up.   It was Scott with Cipriano.

Pulling up alongside each other, Scott cocked his head.  “Murdoch, is there a problem?”

“No…no problem.  Johnny didn’t come in with Franks’s crew.  I thought I’d ride out and ….”

Scott smiled.  “Yes, sir, I understand.” 

Murdoch dipped his head, knowing Scott understood all too well.   When he walked into the house, two weeks ago, with Johnny by his side, Scott had been over the moon.  The two brothers were constantly together now. They were always laughing and roughhousing, as brothers did.  He could see their bond strengthen as each day passed and he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Yes, Murdoch Lancer had a family again.  It felt good to sit around the dinner table and watch his children talking and laughing. 

“Murdoch, are you still going to…?”

“Yes.  We’ll be back by dinner, that is if Johnny will go with me.”

“I’m sure he’ll jump at the chance.”

“Well, then, I’ll see you later. We should be back by dinner time with any luck.”

That morning after orders and a quick ride to Black Mesa, Murdoch found Scott and told him what he planned to do.  His oldest son had agreed, wholeheartedly, it was a good plan.  They both hoped that by giving Johnny some freedom now and then, the boy wouldn’t feel the need to leave. 

What was it he’d said to Scott, “I want your brother to know there’s more to Lancer than just digging post holes and stringing wire.”

Murdoch rode over the rise and looked down at the fenceline the men worked on that morning.  At first, he wasn’t sure Johnny was there.  When he caught a glimpse of gold under a tall shade tree, his breath hitched.  If Barranca was there, then so was his son.   The one thing he knew was Johnny would never leave without the horse.  He was reassured even more when he saw a splash of red hanging on one of the fence posts near the end of the line of fencing. 

If Johnny’s horse and shirt were there, then so was Johnny.

********

Murdoch eased his way down the slope toward his son, a smile on his face.  He was anxious to see the boy.  He found that he missed being with his sons when they were away from him.

He was sure he’d been seen.  He watched as Johnny took his gloves off and put his shirt on, tucking in his shirttail.  He felt uneasy as the boy turned his back to him and went back to half-heartedly digging a hole.

“Hey,” Murdoch called out as he dismounted and walked to where Johnny was standing, coming face to face with his son.  “I missed you when the rest of the work crew came in.”

Murdoch drank in the sight of his son.  The smile on Johnny’s face making him look so much younger than he was.

“Yeah, well, I… figured I’d pass up chow and get a little jump on the job,” Johnny answered, hoping for some sign of approval from his father.

“Nice day.” Murdoch continued to smile while looking down at his son. 

Feeling disappointed in Murdoch’s response, Johnny answered less than enthusiastically, “Yeah.” 

Turning his attention back to the hole, he was digging all he could think was,  “He’s come to check on me. Nothing ever changes.”

Murdoch noted the small hesitation in Johnny’s answer and saw a dark look flash across his son’s face.   He was suddenly afraid that what he was about to say would be rejected, that he would be rejected. 

Murdoch wanted to spend the rest of the day with his youngest son.  He knew what he was about to suggest should make him happy.  At least, he hoped it would.

“I saw a stand of wild horses out by the Black Mesa this morning.” Murdoch kept a smile on his face.

Johnny looked back up at his father, searching his face.

“What’s the old man up to?”

“How much longer do you think you’re going to be working here?” Murdoch questioned, looking down at the half-dug hole.

“Well, I’m just gonna’ lay out a string line.” Johnny turned and motioned toward the row of fence posts already standing.  “That way, it’ll keep the crew busy until dark,” Johnny answered with a hint of excitement.  

“Good thinking,” Murdoch agreed.  He was proud that his son had thought ahead.  Slowly he moved to look at the line of fence posts.

He’d rehearsed the next words.  He hoped they came out right and that his son would take them the way he intended.

“You know a man’s life can be laid out like a row of post holes.”   Picking up a post leaning against a nearby tree, he put his arm over the top of it and looked at Johnny.  

“Sometimes, maybe that’s not all good,” he continued.  “Maybe, there’s a time a man has to listen to the sound of a faraway train whistle.  Kind of… break the pattern.  Maybe, there’s even a time that the most important thing in the world is to go out after a wild horse.”

Johnny looked at his father, hoping he understood what he was saying.

“Out by Black Mesa?” Johnny asked, still not sure what was happening.

“About 40, as near I can figure. No telling how long they’ll be there.  You know how a wild horse… will… move on.”

When Johnny saw the grin on his father’s face and the twinkle in his eye, he knew Murdoch wasn’t talking about horses.  The subtle hint was about him.

Johnny looked down at the half dug hole, and then at his father.

“Yeah, wild horses really move fast…. when he’s got a mind to.”

When the slight smile appeared on his son’s face, Murdoch’s one thought was, “God, how I love this boy.” 

Throwing the shovel aside, Johnny ran to Barranca.  He swung into the saddle in one fluid motion, turned the horse toward Black Mesa, and rode off at a gallop.  

Murdoch was right behind him.

********

Johnny couldn’t believe his eyes when they topped the rise near the mesa.  Down below stretched out a green valley with a meandering stream running through it.   Now, in the early afternoon, the mesa blocked the sun giving the valley a feeling that evening was approaching.

The flat-topped mesa itself stood at least a thousand feet above them with steep cliffs running down to the valley below.   Scott told him the cliff walls were made of lava, formed millions of years ago when an ancient volcano had erupted.   Over time the sides eroded, leaving a flat top to the formation with steep black rock walls running down to the valley floor.  Thus, the name Black Mesa. 

Murdoch was right.  Horses covered the area on both sides of the stream, and there were at least

40 —all of them palominos. 

Johnny’s heart was pounding in his chest.   His blood raced as fast as the horses he and his father were chasing.  As he sped through the valley, he glanced over his shoulder.  Murdoch was doing his best to stay up with him, but his horse was no match for Barranca.

Murdoch couldn’t remember when he’d smiled so much.   The sight of his youngest son chasing the wild herd warmed his heart.   He’d been trying to keep up with his son and the horses but knew he couldn’t.  All he really wanted to do was watch Johnny.  He never grew tired of watching the fluid and graceful movements of the boy.  

For the last twenty minutes, Johnny had first cut out and then given chase to a beautiful palomino mare.    Her golden coat was almost a match to Barrancas.   The white mane on the mare was now plastered to her wet neck as she tried to evade the man on horseback. 

Finally, Johnny was close enough to use his lasso.  Expertly, he whirled it over his head and then tossed the rope.   It landed around the mare’s neck.    Johnny slowed Barranca and pulled back on the rope, causing the horse to stop, turn, and stare at him.

Johnny took up the slack in the rope and watched to see what the mare was going to do next.  He didn’t have to wait long.  She reared on her hind legs and struck out with her front.  The scream of the unhappy mare filled the air.   The sound bounced off the black walls of the mesa and echoed throughout the valley.

Murdoch finally caught up with his son and sat back to watch.

It only took a few minutes before she calmed enough so that Johnny could pull her in closer.

The grin on the boy’s face caused Murdoch’s heart to do somersaults.     If he could have gotten off his horse and done cartwheels, he would have.   He’d never seen Johnny so relaxed and happy.

Johnny jumped off Barranca and edged his way up to the mare.  She shied away as he tried to lay a hand on her neck.  

Johnny started laughing.  Murdoch couldn’t believe how young Johnny looked. At that moment, there was not a hint of Madrid.  There was only Lancer.

“Look at her, Murdoch,” Johnny panted, dragging a shirt sleeve over his face.  Sweat was dripping down his face and onto his now wet shirt.  “Just look at her.  Have you ever seen anything so pretty?   She and Barranca are going to make some real pretty babies.” 

Murdoch dismounted and walked to stand beside his son.   He wanted to reach out and throw an arm around the boy and pull him in close, but he didn’t.

“Yes, son,” Murdoch grinned back and bit his lower lip.  “I believe you’re right.  She’s a fine mare, and you’ll get some beautiful foals out of her.”

Johnny looked the mare over again and shook his head, then looked at his father with laughter in his eyes. 

“Murdoch,” Johnny hesitated, lowered his head, and smiled.  Cocking his head, he looked up at his father.  “Thanks for today.”

“No need to thank me, son.” Murdoch turned to look at his youngest son.  “I’ve enjoyed myself.  Being with you today is like a dream come true.   I’ve waited a lifetime to do this.”  

Johnny nodded agreement.  “So, have I old man.  So, have I.”

He watched Johnny move back toward the mare.   He had waited a lifetime, and he planned to enjoy every moment of it.

********

Johnny looked up at the sun and sighed.  He didn’t want to go back, not yet.

In the last few days, he’d started to feel everything closing in on him.  The old yearnings were coming back.   The gnawing feeling he got when he needed to move on and longed to see something new; to breathe free again.

Murdoch surprised him today, in more ways than one.

He’d never thought Murdoch Lancer would have taken him away from that damn row of fence posts to go after a herd of wild horses.   Then, he’d surprised him by understanding he needed to do something…anything but work.  What had he said, “Maybe, there’s even a time that the most important thing in the world is to go out after a wild horse.”

That’s how he felt.  Today, there was nothing more important to him than to go out after a wild horse.  The day was made perfect by the fact that his father was with him.

He looked around the green valley.  A flock of wild geese flew overhead in a V formation, announcing their passage with the flapping of wings and loud quacking.  The slow, moving stream could be heard as water trickled over rocks in the stream bed.     A light breeze was picking up, making the tall, green grass of the valley wave back and forth.   All of this made more beautiful by the black rock of the mesa looming over them.

Johnny couldn’t imagine a more beautiful place, and he didn’t want to leave it.   “Now or ever.”

He now realized he didn’t have to leave the ranch to find the freedom he was craving.   Lancer was big enough that, if he wanted, he could wander the land, his land, and never feel the yearning again to move on.  He could spend the rest of his life exploring this land and never discover all of its wonders.

Johnny turned to look back at his father.  The old man was looking at him with a smile on his face and laughter in his eyes.

“Murdoch, do you think we can do this again someday…. someday soon?  Maybe, next time we can bring Scott along.  I think he would like to chase a few wild horses himself.”

“I think your brother would like that.” Murdoch saw the smile on his son’s face and treasured it.   “I know I would.  I couldn’t imagine a more perfect day than to have both of my boys out here with me.  What do you say we make it a couple of days next time?  We can camp out and really spend some time together.”

“I’d like that.  I’d like that a lot,” Johnny answered, dipping his head and looking at the ground.   

Murdoch watched his son lower his head, and a thought came to him.  His son looked like he wouldn’t mind his old man putting an arm around him.   To tell the truth, he had held off the urge to do it all afternoon.  He couldn’t stand it any longer.

Murdoch moved closer and put his arm around Johnny’s shoulders.    He pulled the boy close to him.  

Johnny looked up at Murdoch, a little surprised.   That’s when he saw the warmth and love in his father’s eyes.  He knew he’d made the right decision when he’d come back after leaving with Wes and the right choice now.  He put an arm around his father’s waist, leaning into the giant of a man.

He thought he heard and felt his father’s heartbeat increase.  He knew his own heart was beating faster.

The sound of the wild mare whinnying finally intruded on their moment together.    They both smiled.

“Time to go home, John.”  Murdoch released his hold on his son and turned to his horse.   “We’ll chase this herd another day.”

Johnny looked once more at the valley and the mesa.   He watched the fading light dance on the rippling water of the stream.   Sighing, he looked at his father’s back.   He’d made up his mind.

“Murdoch,” Johnny called out.

“Yes, son,” Murdoch answered as he picked up the reins of his horse and started to mount up.

“You don’t have to worry.  I’m home,” Johnny answered in a quiet voice.   “I plan on stayin’.”

Murdoch had one foot almost in the stirrup when he heard his son’s words.  He lowered his foot to the ground and took a deep breath.   It felt like the weight of the world had just been lifted from his shoulders.  He turned and looked into his son’s eyes.

“I’m glad, son.” Murdoch smiled.   “I’ll try not to make you regret it.”   

Johnny gave his father a sheepish grin. “Well…if we can go chasing after wild horses every week, I know I won’t regret it.”

Murdoch saw the gleam in his son’s eyes.  “Mount up, boy,” he snorted as he stepped into the saddle and settled himself.  “Let’s get that mare home and show her to your brother.”

“Murdoch, can we come back here again next week?” Johnny asked as he settled on Barranca.

Murdoch didn’t answer as he turned his horse toward home. 

“Murdoch….,” Johnny shouted.  He watched as Murdoch got further away from him.  “Aww, come on, old man,” he called out louder and started following his father.  “Can we?  I promise to be good….  so, can we?”

Murdoch smiled and kept riding.   

End
September 2018

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