>>387922 (OP)After reading this, my first thoughts are I think you're being way too insecure on your weight. I highly doubt you are THAT fat, and it's definitely a thing no one cares or berates you for, though I get it a lot. I'm not exactly fat, though I've definitely gained weight the past year to the point my mom always berates me for how I look. I'll have to admit my eating habits aren't up to par, especially considering I choose whatever cheap tasty option there is for most of my diet because of my horrible appetite, low income and no availability overall. Stress, depression, and lack of time are definitely factors that makes you do that.
Is it something you can change though? Absolutely, definitely. It's hard, but it's possible. It's kind of like a comfort zone, an addiction loop you can say. I'd rather stick with the same food I've been eating for almost a decade that doesn't take me that long to make and is tasty even if it's unhealthy over bland tasteless eggs that take too long to make (and eat, because of it's awful taste). It is definitely a fight to keep that same habit that I've continously failed because of said factors, but it is definitely possible and changes a lot.
I'll try and not write so long for the other issues since I already wrote so much for the main one, but for the troon stuff, I definitely can't help with this. I feel pity for people who struggle with GD, AGP, homosexuality, etc. as it is more of a mental condition that sometimes brainwashes its' users and can be very hard to stop. Not even chud speak here, but theoretically you will never be a woman, and faggots will never be natural. All of these things are naturally harmful to humans, both to the individual experiencing these and society as a whole.
>imposter syndrome, insomnia, depression, anxiety, ADHD, abysmal self esteemHey, I have those too. Don't think these are unblockable barriers to you working out or on yourself in general. Like I said, it's moreso you stepping out of your comfort zone and creating a healthy habit. I used to always walk to uni and started going to the gym everyday until finals started, I had injuries all over my body from an incident and the gym closed for almost 2 months (actual blocked barrier, though it's definitely an excuse I didn't excercise at home afterwards).
You don't need appetite supressors. You don't need all your problems to magically go away for you to focus on yourself and start changing.
With all the mental illnesses and problems I have, I still take no drugs. Both because I can't swallow pills for some whatever condition I have, and because I can't afford it. Whether I'm physically or mentally ill, I have no option but to thug it out or take syrup like a child in rare cases. Not to mention I'm sure my mom is ignorant and thinks I don't have any of the mental illnesses I have like autism, ADHD, OCD, etc. (mostly as a coping mechanism, but that's part of a problem bigger I won't discuss here), so I end up being called insults like I'm slow, lazy, sloppy, and stuff like that for things I can't control. This stuff always gets worse under pressure and stress aswell, so I act 10x worse. I have no friends and I'm lonely most of the time. I don't know how to act around people and I know being this old and around people is a bad idea so I stay indoors most of the time. People say I should get medicated, and even if I could, I doubt it will help and if anything it will make things worse.
My depression mostly steems from things I can't change or control. I've tried looking for jobs everywhere just to get turned down, which in turn makes it impossible for me to achieve independence and avoid the stress I must suffer through everyday. Only time will tell when that per say can go away, but for things I can control (like my weight, my food intake, working out), then I have no right to complain about even if it feels like torture.
