Simon

5,463 posts

Simon

@_smcf

流浪者・挑戦者・観察者

Tokyosmcf.zip

Joined May 2022

1,444 Following

3,231 Followers

Simon’s posts

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Simon

@_smcf

Mar 9, 2024

THE GARGOYLE Picture this: I was a fresh-faced 21-year-old, a computer science student in Seattle at the University of Washington. Hard to imagine, given my present-day appearance as a grizzled and worldly father figure, but hear me out. Once upon a time, I was a 6’2” 165lb

From the AirBnB bookshelf, signed by the goat himself, bearing a used bookstore price tag of €1.95

I'm not gonna steal it you dinguses. I left the €1.95 on the nightstand.

Nobody beats Edo artists at isolating and expressing the concept of "dork" man

What a delightful week of writing and discarding letters love and hate, consuming "Super Bock", berating countless Claudes Code, walking up hills at night. Obrigado Lisboa

Me too man

Who to follow

matcha monday enjoyoor

doing more things

Proponent of pro-humanity technology.

Left: inro, small boxes for carrying items on one's waist, with attached netsuke, decorative charms. Edo period. Right: dekoden, communications device with traditional ornamentations. 2003.

I keep thinking I'm getting scammed at Lisbon restaurants when they insist I try sips of five different wines, mentally preparing myself for a loud argument when I get charged for all of them. But the check is clean. They actually did just want me to find a good wine.

Only wine related complaint is they didn't let me have a sweet Port with my steak. "That's a dessert wine" they said. "I'm American," I said. "Give me the dessert wine." They did not give me the dessert wine.

...?

Japan and her colonies according to the map on the wall in my AirBnB. Shimonoseki was an island in the strait of Tsushima back in those days.

Small wonder the Portuguese were so fond of Nagasaki back in the day.

SF is so beautiful

In theory, what's to stop a white boy from using the gay sauna non-gayly?

Quote

Simon

@_smcf

Jun 21, 2023

Biggest thing I miss when not in Singapore is a proper Thai massage place that isn't actually a blowjob parlour. Biggest thing I miss when not in Japan is a proper public bath that isn't actually a gay fuckhouse

Good morning Lisboa

Green rivers etching great arcs across the night sky... towering pillars of light flapping like flags in the intense solar winds. I wish you could see it, Superintendent.

I feel the wind shifting

Stamford Raffles died after months of undiagnosable agony. He'd already seen all five of his children die of weird jungle diseases. And then his body got chucked in a vault to dry-age for a hundred years because of a personal beef with the local church. "Men used to be brave!

Replying to

Why did he recap the meetup like a manager documenting the performance of an employee he's getting ready to fire

my b

Quote

Simon

@_smcf

Nov 14, 2023

Here’s a hot tip. You can just borrow JPY at 1.5%. Convert it to USD and earn 5% in some savings account. The weakening yen will even reduce the amount you have to pay back when you’re done making free money. Follow me for more suspicious forex alpha

Replying to

Full-body kiss from the bad bitch who disembowels my yard possums

Fast-track any male friendship by pretending he's a girl you're into. Compliment his outfit when he looks sharp. Invite him to dinner and pay for it. Give him a random keychain you found at the dollar store that fits his vibe. Two weeks that guy will bury a body for you.

The amount of times I've scrolled up in my terminal and wanted the result of that to be ^[[A^[[A^[[A^[[A is zero

"Simon how do I explore Japan like a local!!" Japanese people do not explore Japan. They finish uni and spend the rest of their life tracing a path between gooncave and wagecage. Thrice weekly they stop along the way to pay members of the opposite sex to pretend to be into them.

btw America is one presidential visit to Shanghai away from our Gorbachev-visits-the-supermarket moment

Never become intellectually attracted to someone dude. A sexual attraction, you can get over. Lots of people are hot. When someone starts firing off neurons in you that ain't never been fired, you're gonna be working that bs off for a year+

It is literally easier to get a lunch date with a billionaire than with a girl

Replying to

Rizz levels on both sides of this conversation that I struggle even to imagine

If you live in SF you should be flying to Japan 3+ times a year. It's like $500 and the shortest possible trans-Pacific flight. No excuse. I'll buy you dinner

Replying to

Every time I learn something about the female mode of attraction I'm left tormented and scarred

Replying to

Farmers are the most politically coddled class on earth

How would you fix him

Shoutout to the Japanese dude who was so salty about Japan having privatised its rail network that he became an author and wrote a series of novels about the alternate universe where that didn't happen and Japanese trains are operated entirely by attractive young women

I was angry about not getting into MIT one time so I broke into their OS class (6.828) autograder and did the class alongside the real students just to prove to myself that I could. This too was easier than getting a gf.

I always pay on a date. It hasn't landed me a second date in five years, but I keep doing it because I love giving women free stuff. Deep lindy. Also being ghosted gives me an excuse to smoke contemplatively in the rain. I think I'm gonna go do that right now.

Replying to

It is literally easier to make one million dollars doing computer bs than it is to get a gf

I had a French roommate in Singapore who I'm pretty sure bedded every Frenchman and woman on the island. I'd get up every morning and there'd be a new French person in their underwear on the couch. Extremely French behavior, couldn't even be mad.

Replying to

What the fuck

50Hz hum intensifies

I was undressing in the locker room in an onsen up a hill somewhere in Shizuoka when I heard a phone camera shutter behind me. I spun around, thinking I was getting perved on, but it was just a large man taking a shirtless belly selfie. His back to me, I peered at his screen

Replying to

Going goblin mode on snake venom cause of 9/11 is fucking crazy lore I wish I had that kind of dog in me

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