torment you with the same thing that triggered these alters into existence in the first place while you're still in the middle of your head being screamed at by all the other corners, some that wanted the abuse to continue and others that think you're about to do it yourself at all times

saw someone call me a "pro-contact pedophile" and that isn't true but it took a non-zero amount of time to wake up and realize it. ive hurt myself terribly.

i had to reach this position to survive, but it still triggers me, it still immobilizes me with terror. not all of us are on the same page and we're going to die if we can't reconcile ourselves. i feel bren's panic attacks in my own chest.

I feel like if I was sexually assaulted as a kid I would have very easily gone to the same headspace you exist in. Idk sometimes I do get the feeling that may have happened and i like completely erased it from my memory because a lot of my behaviors as a kid were very indicative of that.

Idk I won't go into detail about the specifics but I wonder if it was like, just me being autistic and not understanding personal space and sexuality or like, idk something happened and I was emulating that. I don't like to think about it.

the way people have chosen to target you specifically and completely ignore the subtext you are all but stating aloud is deeply cruel. this cognitive dissonance can definitely happen with dissociative disorders and having been through that kind of abuse. none of this has been fair to you

i hope you are taking care of yourself the best you can. i’m really sorry that people cannot think critically

yeahhhh. i wish the internet was different, where honest conversations about really difficult, complex, traumatic topics could actually thrive. i think we'd all be so much better off for it. but alas, people just can't sit in their discomfort and think about *why* they feel it. they just act on it.

people on the internet are just horrific to CSA victims I’m sorry you’re going through this