Sniffer Pros
I’m Dan Piraro, the creator of the Bizarro newspaper comic. Each week, I post my Sunday Bizarro comic, a short essay, and then the past week’s Monday-Saturday Bizarro comics written and drawn by my partner Wayno, whose weekly blog post I highly recommend.
And here’s this week’s ANSWER KEY to my Sunday comic’s Secret Symbols.
Welcome, Jazz Pickles, one and all. “All” are probably not here, so welcome, one and some.
Seemingly only ten minutes since last year’s holiday season, the holiday season is upon us again. Time is an illusion, but it is one that increases in speed until your birthdays seem only a few days apart.
But back to the holiday thing:
In King Features’ Comics Kingdom Shop, you can get these fun Bizarro gifts, suitable for shoving into a sock or wrapping and hiding under a dead tree somebody has dragged inside. Humans are funny.
Also cool, they’re offering a 30% discount on custom or framed Bizarro prints and free shipping until the end of the year. Click on this link to select any Bizarro cartoon by date and enter the Discount Code: BIZARROHOLIDAY24
(If you’re not thrilled with the degree of ease with which prints can be ordered, be sure to tell them. But don’t tell them I said that.)
Though we benefit from your purchases, note that King operates that shop, not us, so please direct shipping questions and the like to them.
I confess I hate having to make sales pitches here, but this is how cartoonists make a living now.
That, and by busting our knuckles weekly to bring you funny pictures and words. Let’s sample Wayno’s Bizarro cartoons from the week, one or more of which you may wish to order as a print at a 30% discount!
If I could choose a superpower, it would be to hear a song I hate, and not have it stuck in my head for days.
Never back-sass a woman who has knitting needles. I made that mistake once with my grandmother.
It’s almost an emergency that I now need a chocolate-covered ice cream cone.
For you secret symbol hunters, the Evil Queen’s crown is not included in Wayno’s count. If you want to count it, go ahead. This isn’t a bar exam.
When this happens to me—and one day it will—I’ll be downloading the “ShootMeNow” app.
Does his suit ever make him stick to something he doesn’t want to stick to? Like trash bags when he brings them out to the bin, for instance.
That’s it for this week, JzPks. If you want to be one of our superheroes, please consider supporting our efforts to continue to bring you comics free of charge and without ads or pop-ups (Pop-Tarts, maybe, but never pop-ups!) via the links below. We’ll love you for it.
The Naked Cartoonist…My every-other-week subscription newsletter of humorous creative writing, photos, art, & more.
… Bizarro TIP JAR One-time or repeating. Your choice!
WAYNO’S TIP JAR One-time or repeating. Your choice!
My graphic novel PEYOTE COWBOY
…Signed, numbered, limited-edition prints and original Bizarro panels
COMICS KINGDOM SHOP (now with Bizarro products!)
Comments (24)
When toilets need an app - I will no longer flush. That'll teach 'em.
One of the knitting needles is an arrow. That'll keep the project on the straight and narrow.
As Lily Tomlin said in "Grace and Frankie," at a certain age -which I reached a while ago- "my superpower is invisibility" to anyone under 30. Except, thank goodness, my grandkids.
Same…I wanted a chocolate covered ice cream the second I saw that!
"Time is an illusion" It depends on where you are when you look at time in our universe. If you are outside of your universe, one can insert yourself at anytime. If one is in our universe, time is linear, thus freewill exist, because depending on one's choice determines the timeline you travel down. I hope that is as clear as mud. Thanks for the statement.
There's an app for everything now!! ( which makes every little thing more complicated these days ) Really. Clever Spiderman panel and I am so happy my mirror doesn't talk back to me! 😀
The "Flush Me" app is my personal favorite Bizarro of the year and your comment reflects my sentiments exactly! I'm so sick of every new gadget/appliance not coming with written instructions and instead, telling me to download something..something..something.
BTW, my all-time favorite 1-panel cartoon is the Far Side's "Ha ha ha, Biff. Guess what? After we go to the drugstore and the post office, I'm going to the vet's to get tutored." This "Flush Me" ranks right up there with it!
Many thanks, Oz! The "FlushMe" gag was based on a true dishwasher.
We just bought a Bosche dishwasher 300 series and you cant run all the cycles, EXCEPT the rinse and the clean-machine, without the app! That software engineer needs to be fired.
The police dogs were amusing. The toilet app was "concerning" as they say nowadays. Probably prescient! But the Spiderman cartoon was great!
Always a joy Dan!
A note on whizzing dogs…My dog always gives the one leg salute to a sign the reads “WATER RESTRICTIONS IN EFFECT”. He is doing his part to avert the drought.
I've been a commercial and homebrewed beer judge, and I completely relate to the dog's side-eye on that Bizarro beer aroma!
910!?! Aaaaahh! I almost laughed 🤘🤣❤️
This isn't the bar exam?
Hmmm... I never took it because I had not desire to work in the local bar.
How does the cleaning lady differentiate between cobwebs and Spiderman webs that she might get stuck in?
🤔..........🕸😸
Fantastic use of an “upsized” iPhone/iPad for the Evil Queen’s Mirror Mirror on the Wall — Zoom call.
Good ones!
Retired police dogs are great! Makes me try thinking of new quotes... I bit the president's left ankle … I sired two litters of puppies with that nice bitch on the force, waiting in the van … I better stop now.
Feliz navidad y próspero año nuevo, Dan.
Thanks for the heads up on the crown secret symbol. I always look for them. I guess I'm a true jazz pickle. I also subscribe to, and love, your naked cartoonist blog. And I'm thrilled every time I see a new Peyote Cowboy episode. I race through it, first, because I need to know the story. Then I go back and take my time checking out your beautiful art work.
Thanks so much for your lovely note, Peg. You made my day!
What I say about time as I have gotten older:
I’m over the hill and picking up speed!
Hmmm...your name looks familiar.
Cheers,
Linda