Starting a new thread since the last one was starting to take long to load.
>>76864You pass around a pipe as a peace offering to the natives. The three, spear-wielding men accept you as a friend of the tribe and offer to bring you back with them to "the rez".
>>77216eat one of them in order to win the fear and respect of the rest
>>77218In your state of drug-fueled psychosis, you devour one of the little Indian men whole. His compatriots do not look pleased.
THE NAJAVO NATION HAS DECLARED WAR ON YOU
>>77224Run away and hide behind one of those weird rock formations there are in the reservations
>>77228>>77249You grab the spear and make a run for it. After an hour of sprinting you take shelter behind a rock. The Indians seem to have lost your trail for now.
>>77264yoo is that a friggin fingerboy? grab his leg and use him as a means of transportation to the nearest white-populated city
>>77266You reach down to grab what you presumed to be a fingerboy's leg, before seeing the full figure of this strange creature.
Hmmmm, he's not quite fingerboy, but he's not quite human either....
>>77266I dont think the fingerboy can carry you that far anon.
>>77272kick your former self to see if it's still alive.
also, see if your fingerlings are okay
>>77276You give the creature a nudge with your foot to see if it reacts. You wait a few moments, but it doesn't move.
In your medical opinion, the creature and the babies(?) in its overcoat pocket are dead.
>>77278For some reason the site of the dead fingerlings brings a tear to your eye
>>77278Give yourself a proper burial, and in a very film-student artsy fartsy way, notice how this is a metaphor for being born again
>>77279You don't know why, but the sight of the dead fingerlings causes you to become hopelessly sad. Why do you feel such a strong connection to these creatures? You try to think back to your past, but everything becomes hazy before you assumed control of Soystein's body.
>>77281Take the time to bury the bodies, regurgitate one of the bones from the native to use as a grave marker of sorts.
>>77281try using the meds to see if those can revive it
>>77282In spite of your recent disregard for human life, you take the time to give the poor creature and its hatchlings a proper burial, using one of the native's bones that you regurgitated as a grave marker.
>>77338Sit down and think about your awful depressing life.
>>77343Legend of zelda ocarina of time
>>77340You take a moment to contemplate your awful and depressing life. You were born as a pickle, you took over some poor fellow's body after chewing through his insides, and now you've gone and gotten the entire Najavo nation to declare war on you.
"Am I evil?" you ask yourself. A voice calls back and answers you, "worse, you're smart."
>>77345LOL, are we just referencing cringiest Rick and Morty momments now, I'm on board.
>>77347You disregard the strange voice you heard and decide it would be best to go hunting for food before it gets dark. You spot a delicious bug hopping around from behind a rock.
>>77356Sneak up on him Stick him with the spear
>>77364"Boo!" you shout, spooking the lil buggy.
"Who is that???" he replies.
"Just me, lol," you respond as you exit from behind the rock.
Impstein: "Sorry for spooking you little guy, I just wanted to get your attention."
Bug: "It's okay, what is it you wanted?"
>>77377Ask him about the corpse you saw earlier
>>77377grab the bug by the neck and threaten to eat him live unless he tells you about the body
>>77383You ask the six-legged fellow about the corpse you saw earlier. He tells you he doesn't know about any corpses, but he did witness an eruption earlier from beyond the reservation that sent debris shooting into the air. Perhaps the corpse came from there.
>>77398ask the bug to join forces with you against the navajo nation
>>77398holy sneed the volcano
get OUT and forcefully take the bug with you
>>77399You ask the bug to join forces with you against the Navajo Nation. He declines, informing you that he is a friend of the Navajo. Also your CHA is too low in this form.
>>77403Kidnap the bug for ranson for the Navajo
>>77405
Since he refuses to cooperate, you toss the bug into a sack and bring him with you as a bargaining chip. Nightfall descends on the reservation.
>>77412use the bugbag as a pillow and sleep
>>77344Majora's Mask has less annoying Navi and you don't have to save Zelda's ass from Ganondork.
>>77418>>77429You construct a makeshift tent from your clothes, using the bugbag as a pillow. It's a beautiful night out here in the open air, you can even see the stars. Look, there's the nikocado constellation!
>>77590And hope all that cheese you ate earlier won't give you nightmares
I haven't laughed this hard at a thread in a while
>>77589
You go to sleep, but are awoken in the middle of the night by two Indians carrying away an unconscious Swede who looks oddly familiar to you. You don't know what to make of it, but assume that the cheese you ate earlier is just giving you hallucinations and fall back asleep.
>>77596Go to the native vilaige and try your to trade your bug for something.
>>77596Thanks for doing the Swede doctor thing though I deleted the reply, I felt like I might be pushing how much a single reply can effect the story.
>>77602Nah, it's cool. I like when you guys contribute to the lore.
>>77600Its true though
Nobody asked
Nobody cares
>Its true though
>Nobody asked
>Nobody cares
>>77611>>77612I really don't know why you're still bothering to post given that since I've started namedropping your KiwiFarms screenname more often, it's more likely that they'll notice that and start to realize that it is the same user on KiwiFarms, and also noticing there's an abnormal amount of MLP and loli posts with an Argentina flag and similar posting style, after they see “ban-evading Argentinian.”
Connections are gonna be made, and you'll be pretty much outed as the scummy pedophile that I always saw you as, but it'll be confirmed in everyone else's eyes as well. And last I checked, KiwiFarms doesn't have a positive stance on lolicons and pedophiles. Not to mention the obvious fact that you've gone against the rules of KiwiFarms too with this line: "If a person starts sending you...emails, calling your phone...to intimidate you or cause you distress, that is harassment."
Even if you didn't have a problem with me calling you out on posting garbage that doesn't belong outside their respective containment boards and didn't try to dox me, I'd still have more online that would give an unknowing person an idea that I live an at least somewhat interesting life. But all everyone's going to know you for is for being a ban-evading pedophile that can't stand the idea of people not liking things.
Not to mention that that thread on KiwiFarms is the ONLY thread you've posted in, which shows you're pretty much orbiting me 24/7.
Chances are, if you actually lived a desirable life, then saying that “I missed posts” or whatnot wouldn’t be the most accomplishment that you will ever get in your life.
I advise you to stop posting on this site (if not now, then soon), because this hole is only going to get deeper, and it's not going to take long before I make an infodump to out you as a pedophile on KiwiFarms the same way you tried to out me, JustPassingThrough.
>>77596Is Impjak counted as one of the 17 who survived the Asylum explosion?
>>77710yeah, well soyswedeson survived and we can assume swolesome survived, so 15 survivors left.
or maybe soyswedeson is reported as missing instead of survived, so who knows
>>77601At the crack of dawn, you wake up and put your clothes back on. You travel towards the village you saw earlier when you first entered the reservation. You arrive at the gate.
Warning: the natives have orders to kill you on sight
>>77726hold up their bug friend and offer to exchange him for their prisoner
>>77718096 probably survived as well. isn't the original SCP completely unstoppable?
>>77728You lift up the sack and tell the guard that you have a hostage, their dear friend buggy, in exchange for the man they captured last night.
The guard raises an eyebrow. "Can I see the hostage?" he asks.
>>77731You take the hostage out to show the guard. He's dead. Maybe you shouldn't have used him as a pillow.
>>77733as a sign of good will, vomit up the remains of the native you ate and present it to the guard for a proper burial
>>77734In an attempt to remedy the situation, you try regurgitating some of the dead tribesman that you ate earlier. However, it seems that all of his remaining bones have been digested, so you only vomit up a little stomach acid onto your chin.
The guard does not look pleased.
>>77735seems like you just can't win with these guys. what did you ever do to them?
the time for talking is over. chuck your spear at the guard, then storm the place and try to take soyswedeson by force
>>77736After several attempts on your part, it seems that there's no making peace with these savages. It looks like you're going to have to do this the hard way.
You carefully take out the spear that you were clenching between your muscular cheeks and toss it at the guardsman, killing him instantly.
>>77737pick up the bugjak and the bag in case you'll need them, then bust through the gates
saging this sticky
kill uareselfs
such a kino gem it is truly hard to even appreciate what a keyed gem it is
>>77739You pick up the dead bug and toss him back in the sack to use as a flail. Using your superswedish strength, you break open the gate in a single, fiery punch.
Suddenly, you spot something on the horizon.
IT'S THE SWEDISH POLICE!
>>77973ignore the helicopter as they're not looking for you (you reincarnated, remember).
blind one guard with the bag, smack the dead bug in the face of the other one, then charge past them
>>77981you're committing a crime against bipoc folx tho
>>77986amerindians are mongols and therefore not BIPOC tho
>>77981Impjak do still be lookin kinda swedish tho, the police will def be suspicious at least
>>77973what is the swedshi police doing on US soil tho? Doesn't that break international laws?
Sorry, y'all, I had to delay the next update to teach this incel chud >>79081 a lesson in kindness.
>>79195>>79131>>79158Knew it would make the swedes from this thread take a next step on cope kek also KYS
>>79220I don't reply with kys to those and you know that
Fail...
>>79222Fail again
It wasn't that war and i still don't reply with kys to those
>>79224Fail yet again
I still don't reply with kys to those
Ugh just pick the right one already
>>79226It's not an impjak how didn't you know
>swede spent all of his creative strenght in the war creating cringy winning power fantasies instead of continuing his story
Fail!
>>swede spent all of his creative strenght in the war creating cringy winning power fantasies instead of continuing his story
>Fail!
>>>swede spent all of his creative strenght in the war creating cringy winning power fantasies instead of continuing his story
>>Fail!
>>79458You don't look like that
I look like that
End of story.
>>79495>>>>swede spent all of his creative strenght in the war creating cringy winning power fantasies instead of continuing his story>>>Fail!
Thanks for killing the drawfag soitards
Hey soybros, I got bad news... I'm going to be busy for the foreseeable future so I won't be able to update the comic anytime soon. If someone else (or multiple people) wants to continue where I left off I fully encourage it, otherwise I'll probably start a new thread when I have the time again.
>>79507I could but im not on my computer rn lol
>>>79495 (You)
>>>>>swede spent all of his creative strenght in the war creating cringy winning power fantasies instead of continuing his story
>>>>Fail!
>>79507thanks for the gems, the next storyteller has very big shoes to fill
>>79532>NOOO NOT THE HECKIN REDDIT COMIC-ERINO NOOOOO WHAT WILL I DO WITH MY LIFE NOW FELLOW WOJACKERS
>>79507I might make a few entries tomorrow
>>NOOO NOT THE HECKIN REDDIT COMIC-ERINO NOOOOO WHAT WILL I DO WITH MY LIFE NOW FELLOW WOJACKERS
>>79507Ok, good luck with whatever you are doing.
>>79727And for some reason, you thought posting that would be an epic good luck wish in whatever he's doing
>And for some reason, you thought posting that would be an epic good luck wish in whatever he's doing
>Found the seething WOJACKER
>>79865Oh no incel bros we surely got that tranny hahahaa
>>79867One of you is a tranny. I can feel it.
The person you responded to is a lying bitch from Tumblr who is simping for them and pretends to be one of them.
>>79507I will continue the story (can't draw so visualize in your head)
You charge past the remaining indians and break into the cuck shed which houses soyswedeson. The swedish police circle overhead, demanding that you surrender. The indians in the shed cower in fear.
>>82367nigga literally just open ms paint
>>82367we need the heckin images bruh
>>82377Thanks bro
What do we do now, friends? Make a choice
>>82393draw it really shitty
only the outlines
shouldnt take more than a couple of minutes per scene
>>82394Im too much of a lazy nigger to do it. Op said we should work together do maybe somone draw and I write?
>Just visualize it you npc's
>>82410shut up
visualizing is a good idea
we dont need drawings
>shut up
>visualizing is a good idea
>we dont need drawings
>>82415whats your problem fuckface
how the fuck did you listen to non visual media back in the day
you just have to imagine the scene, its a good idea
>I will continue the story (can't draw so visualize in your head)
>You charge past the remaining indians and break into the cuck shed which houses soyswedeson. The swedish police circle overhead, demanding that you surrender. The indians in the shed cower in fear.
is a good idea
please continue
>>82417This story isn't of enough substance to work that way, it was carried quite a bit by the funny images, not like the story is meant to be good by itself.
>>82367You run back to capitol reef national park
>imagine thinking we can continue this without pictures
........______________
......./.............................\
....../...............................\
...../.......___ _____..........\
..../.......|_0_|------|_0_|.......\
.../.......////......|.........\\\\........\
../.....//../........|..........\.\.\........\
.|../....////........\..........\\\\\\..\....|
.|.................**.WWW.*........|
.\............W.._______.W......./
...\.......W**./.............|.*W.../
.....\.....W.*.|..............|.**W/
.....\.....W.*.|............../.**W|
.......\.WW.*\______/*WW/
........\|\#.*/..|*\./,.\|./;/W
>shit ass idea THOUGH
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>>82367not canon since you didn't post a pic
>>82501>>imagine thinking we can continue this without pictures
>>shit ass idea THOUGH
>>82605not to mention that he ignored the legit reply to storyanon
Sorry for the long wait, I'm back y'all.
>>77981Remembering the basics of CQC, you swiftly blind one of the guards with the bag and smack the other across the face with the dead buggo. You proceed to charge past the incapacitated guards and take cover behind a brick wall. The swedish police force descend from their chopper.
Over the swedecopter's PA you hear "Give it up! We have you surrounded. Come out with your hands up and we might not shoot."
>>79657Not everyone who doesn't like Wojaks is a tranny. You have trannies who use Wojaks and even Soyjaks.
>>82655I was shaving because I felt like it.
As they say, sometime a beard can make you look like a weirdo.
>>82660Because I shaved too hard. It can't be seen now, but that's where I got injured.
Also, I underrestimated you, Soyposters.
>>82653Are you the OP or are you a new illustrator?
>>82663Also, I have school tomorrow so I won't talk to you tonight.
>>82655>Not everyone who doesn't like Wojaks is a tranny. You have trannies who use Wojaks and even Soyjaks.
>>82653hold your hands up in surrender and tell the officer that the navajo nation is holding a swedish citizen hostage
>>82666You picked the wrong picture, fool.
>>82674Also, keep this gem alive. Now I have to go.
>>82664OP, al(though) updates may still be inconsistent this week.
>>82667You put your hands up in the air and surrender to the Swedish police force. Hoping to demonstrate your innocence, you inform them that a fellow Swedish citizen is being held hostage by the Navajo Nation inside this very compound.
>>83272Was Impjak always wearing that shirt? Mandela effect though!
Try to figure out if the police look friendly enough to co-operate and check how many of them surround you, it would be good to know how outnumbered you are
>>83282You use the brief pause in action to evaluate the situation. Although the police look your average swedes, you can't tell if they're friendly or not, given that they seem intent on apprehending you.
You estimate that around 30 troops are stationed around the compound, in addition to the 4 before you. You hazard that you could take out about 15 of them using your superswedish strength combined with Dr. Soystein's own latent abilities, but there's no guarantee that you'd make it out alive.
>>83480play it safe and allow them to load you into the helicopter. also remind them once more that the navajo are holding doyswedeson hostage
>>83480alsuwid satakun lana qaribaan inshallah
>>83480Why do their guns look like sex toys?
>>83486An officer approaches you. He stops a few feet away from you and begins patting you down with his eyeballs. He seems confused.
Suddenly, he removes a photo from his pocket and stares down at it. He pauses for a few moments before speaking into his mic, "uh, command, I don't think this is our guy."
You sigh a breath of relief upon hearing the news. You again tell the officer that another swede is being held hostage by the tribesmen here. He radios the information back to his superiors.
>>83503join up with the sharia police tbh
>>83505You offer your assistance to the diversity division. They happily accept and allow you to tag along as they raid the main building. You bust through the door to the dimly lit bunker. Soyswedeson sits unconscious at the opposite end of the room, guarded by two men. The one on your left looks at you and smirks, "heh... so it's as he thought. You've returned to the world of the living once again."
>>83528holy moly, it's the casino guy! ask him how trump is doing
>>83530Your memory comes jogging back. You know this man, you just don't know how. But you do know that he worked for Trump at his Las Soygas casino and resort.
You demand to know where Trump is and how he's doing. The man replies, "That old chud? I'm afraid he's dead, courtesy of BBB."
>>83531shit, so that was canon after all.
anyway, tell him to hand over soyswedeson
>>83532>>83533*Bigly
>>83536You tell the shadowy man to hand over the swede before somebody gets hurt. He laughs heartily at your request and begins unbuttoning his vest.
"You're in for a world of pain, little man," the ripped redman says to you.
>>83543Put on your captain sweden outfit and agree to be raped if it frees Dr. Soyswedeson.
>>83543raise your fists into a fighting posture and carefully approach him
>>83544You've had enough fighting for today, and decide to take the pacifist's route. You take off your doctor's gown and don your Captain Sweden uniform that is given to all native Swedes once they come of age. You look breathtaking.
Your opponent is taken back for a few moments, but ultimately decides that poon is poon and begins ravaging your deliciously thick rear end. The police officers watch on in horror at this haram act, but don't say anything out of respect to Swedish culture and traditions. A single tear rolls down your cheek as the act is over.
>>83546he looks very beautiful here
>>83546now tell the indian once again to hand over soyswedeson
>>83589You ask the friendly Indian man once more to free the hostage. He reluctantly obliges, stoically stating that "The boss will be angry about this one, but he's too busy looking for links to notice."
The Indian motions to his compatriot to release Soyswedeson, who finally awakens from his comatose state.
Soyswedeson: "Where am I? Why am I näked?? Where is my spröke??? Dr. Sprökeberg, is this ånother one of your pranks?"
>>83925ask him about the mystery man that soystein was talking to over the videolink
>>83940Ignoring the dazed and confused Dr. Soyswedeson, you ask your indigenous butt buddy about who he was referring to when he said "so it's as he thought."
The man replies, "you don't need to know his identity, only that he's the one that he's the one that gives the orders."
Impstein: "Gives the orders? You mean you work for him?"
Indian: "Of course, who better to usher in the New Normal than our benefactors at BBB?"
Impstein: "New Normal? BBB? What are you talking about?"
Indian: "Perhaps I've said too much..."
>>84124*only that he's the one that gives the orders
>>84124generously offer to spare his life if he tells you about BBB
>>84132You offer to spare your newfound lover's life in exchange for more information about "BBB". Before he can speak, his eardrums burst and he falls to the floor in a pool of his own blood. Something here isn't right.
Can someone make a video out ofof this?
>>84195search his pockets for clues
>>84222You search his pockets for valuables. You discover a flip phone, a keychain, four beads, and an EBT card.
>>84514You take your outfit off and put your doctors outfit back on, then you look on the phone.
>>84517No longer requiring the seductive powers of your Captain Sweden uniform, you remove the costume and put back on your doctor's gown.
You open up the flip phone and begin scrolling through his contacts. Nothing strikes you as particularly noteworthy until you stumble upon a contact known as "Mr. Gold".
>>84532You call Mr. Gold to see what happens while Dr. Soyswedeson freaks out in the backround.
>>84535You call Mr. Gold's number and wait patiently for him to pick up. Finally, he answers, "what is it?!? I already have enough on my plate dealing with the fallout from SHIC2.0, what could you possibly want Chief??"
How do you respond?
>>85458Pretend to be the Indian and ask about SHIC2.0 (claim you have amnesia)
>>85464You do your best impression of an Indian an ask the mysterious Mr. Gold about SCHIC2.0, claiming that your memory is fuzzy from amnesia (you do have amnesia tho).
"Have you been smoking too many peace pipes or something? The looney farm of course, just down the ways from the rez. Surely you heard the big boom the other day?"
I'm lost, what is our goal right now?
>>85484tell him that soystein wishes to see him in person, and inquire about his location
>>85619You inform the elusive man that Dr. Soystein wishes to meet with him in person to discuss the incident that occurred at SCHIC2.0.
Mr. Gold: "So Soystein is still alive? Very well, tell him I'll meet with him at..."
CHOOSE LOCATION
>>85687capitol reef, since you have a (hopefully mature by now) fingerboy army waiting for you there. they can watch your back during the meeting
>>85689You set up the meeting with Mr. Gold back at Capitol Reef National Park. You ask the Swedish Police Force to give you a ride in their helicopter, which they oblige given your brave rescue of a fellow swede. After dropping you off, they return to their mission to find the criminal that dared utter the N-word. You decide to let Dr. Soyswedeson tag along with you for backup.
You come across a cabin that seems familiar to you. However, dried blood stain surround the entrance.
>>85695send soyswedeson into the cabin to make sure it's safe
>>85695I thought the swedish police were hunting us for eating the mosque at the beginning,
also do we still have the spear after the raid? we should ready it if we still have it
>>85703You send Soyswedeson into the cabin to investigate. You hear nothing out of the ordinary for awhile until suddenly Soyswedeson starts banging on the door of the cabin for help.
>>86066You rip the door off the hinges and look inside
>>86074You tear off the door by the hinges, freeing Dr. Soyswedeson, who falls to the ground with a thud, rendering him unconscious once again.
You enter the empty cabin. It's deathly dark, and a strange smell emanates from an unknown source...
>>86119I'm getting jaw-dropping, bone-chilling A24 horror vibes.
>>86982
does what for free
>>86124You peer up at the ceiling. To your horror, a number of seemingly lifeless soyjaks dot the interior of the cabin, hanging from what appears to be web.
>>87243you decide to throw john deadcorns indestructible flip phone at the ceiling to try and knock some bodies down
>>87247You toss the flip phone you pickpocketed earlier at the ceiling, hopping to shake one of the bodies loose. However, the darkness obscures your aim and you end up hitting one of the giant pustules, cracking it open.
>>87342you put buggy over your head to prevent whatever comes out from touching you, and you try and get to cover
>>87381poor buggy he seemed so nice
>>87381You no longer have the dead buggo on your person, so you decide to use Soyswedeson as a human shield instead. You hold him above your head, but nothing seems to be emerging from the opened egg sac.
>>87720Put him down, and apologise.
>>87724You put Dr. Soyswedeson down and apologize, but to your amazement he is still fast asleep.
Suddenly, the door to the cabin opens and in walks a mysterious figure.
"Ah, Soystein, you're here. You have a lot of explaining to do over what happened to SCHIC2.0"
>>87745still being in a state of trauma-induced amnesia ridden stupor, incoherently ramble on about picklejaks and "missed cheese"
>>87754Suffering from a moment of trauma-induced schizophrenia, you ramble incoherently about pickles and cheese.
The mysterious man steps out from the shadows upon hearing these words and asks you, "what did you just say, motherfucker?"
>>87764You mumble out that your cheese is go ne
>>87764tell him that soyswedeson carelessly allowed a trespassing fingerboy to bring cheese into the asylum
>>87768You continue mumbling on about cheese, claiming that it's all gone and he missed it.
Mr. Gold does not take kindly to this and begins powering up.
"It's on bitch. I knew I never should have picked you over Dr. Gigachad. Now I can correct that mistake."
>>87773You snap back to your senses and attempt to place the blame on Dr. Soyswedeson, claiming that he let a fingerboy trespass within the facility on his watch. You may have also mentioned something about stolen sproke.
Soyswedeson suddenly wakes up with a look of terror on his face as his eyes are fixated in Mr. Gold's direction.
>>87780slowly back away from soyswedeson and lee and see what happens
>>87787You slowly back away from Soyswedeson and Mr. Gold as a highly venomous spiderswede descends from the ceiling.
"Uh oh," Mr. Gold proclaims before having his insides liquified by the creepy crawly Swedish arachnid.
>>87803pick up soyswedeson and evacuate the cabin while the spiderswede feasts on gold
>>87803You yell out about the power of Swedish fauna, Soyswedeson is his surprised stupor rambles about the Huevos archiving on /int/.
>>87806>>87807You pick up Soyswedeson once again and dash out of the cabin into the night. You take the opportunity to boast about the uncontested power of Swedish fauna, with which Soyswedeson chimes in, "Ja! And he let the Huevos ärchive as well!"
>>87809it's cold, and without shelter you will surely freeze to death.
seek out the fingerboy mom's corpse and use it for warmth
When will we get the video adaptation
>>88590The last video was released when the story wasn't as long
No one is autistic enough to turn the whole thing into a video anymore
>>88592I've been thinking about making a video for the asylum section, but I've never gotten around to it
>>87810You seek shelter from the cold night air. Stumbling upon the remains of a fingerboy killed in a territorial skirmish, you prop the carcass up on two sticks and huddle underneath it for warmth. Dr. Soyswedeson says that he is still cold, so you carve out some fingerboy webbing for him to use as an insulator.
>>89045You make him suck your cock.
>>89046You give Dr. Soyswedeson a warm, Swedish hug. The bond between you has strengthened.
+1 Affinity
>>89050Sleep in shifts just in case.
>>89056You decide to sleep in shifts in case any more wildlife is lurking around. Dr. Soyswedeson takes the first shift, and you doze off into slumber once again...
>>89225You are abruptly awoken by Dr. Soyswedeson. He appears to be panicking.
You look up only to see a starless sky. However, on closer observation, it is not sky at all, but the pitch black walls of some unknown, subterranean location that the two of you appear to be descending into on a raised platform.
Yep time to take a piss, maybe even a shit.
>>89239ask soyswedeson what happened. he was supposed to be on watch after all
>>89239I appreciate the morty puke in mouth.
>>89239>>77214 (OP)Wait!Pick up the Not-So-Ordinary Mask that's just lying on the floor! You might need it later!
>>89749warningcroatian interferencenot canon
>>89784100% CANON ALL DISAGREERS ARE SPIES WEAR THE MASK,TRANNIES SPIES WHO DISAGREE MUST BE IGNORED
>WEAR THE MASK,TRANNIES SPIES WHO DISAGREE MUST BE IGNORED
>>89799they aren't though because the maskfag wasn't the first person to reply
>>89806>WEAR THE MASK,DISCORD TRANNIES SPIES WHO DISAGREE MUST BE IGNORED >>89346You ask Soyswedeson how the two of you ended up here. He tells you that while you were asleep the ground suddenly rumbling and the dirt gave way to this metallic platform, which the two of you are descending on now.
>>89819*the ground suddenly began rumbling
>>89819you begin looking around the pitch black area
>>89869Mysterious goo comes out of nowhere
>>89801>>89801I know him. He doesn't even like Biden nor Harris nor does he support BLM.
>>89972He seethes less than other dewdz. Can this story at least have boogie?
>>89972i say that but i don't look like that in the slightest
>>89820I don't think you can decide what happends with environment, only what Swede does. OP controlls everything else.
>mfw didn't even notice I got quads
>>90009You could've used those quads to bring attention to poor palestinian children getting bombed by evil israelis, trans issues, or innocent black lives getting shot by police, but you didn't, kill yourself.
>>89869You further observe your surroundings. As far as you can tell, there is nothing but pitch blackness in this underground cavern.
>>89869Using your patented Ear™ technology, you hear the faintest sound of running water. After squinting your eyes in the sound's direction, you notice several streams of a mysterious, reddish substance running down the walls.
Author's note: Thanks for sticking with me guys, despite my inconsistent schedule. I really appreciate your continued interest in the story.
>>90280Hold Soyswedeson out so he can gather some of this reddish substance then taste it
>>90280Consult the Ancient Nordic Gods to loan you wisdom
>>90280NO problem, dude, this thing is a lot of fun, feels like oldschool 4chan and I mean it in a good way.
>>90287You hoist Soyswedeson over the chasm in order for him to examine the reddish substance. Before he can gather a sample, he bonks his head on what appears to be a clear tube that the substance is flowing through.
>>90664Follow the direction the tube comes from, we have to get to the source eventually.
>>89749>>89760>>90421croatian, you have already been told in the last thread how to write your suggestions, yet you keep writing nonsensical/disruptive ones where you try to force your own ideas, plot devices and memes which would completely derail the plot.
have you even been keeping up with the story?
>croatian, you have already been told in the last thread how to write your suggestions, yet you keep writing nonsensical/disruptive ones where you try to force your own ideas, plot devices and memes which would completely derail the plot.
>have you even been keeping up with the story?
>>91056That wasn't me. It was that Vinluv dude. He posts anything related to "The Mask" franchise.
Seems like a pattern of KYMfags not knowing how things work.
>>90824Eat the umbilical like cord on the ground, it seems to be leading you somewhere
>>90824You and Dr. Soyswedeson grapple onto the translucent tube and begin descending further down into the darkness with the intent of discovering the tube's source.
From out of the blackness you hear an elderly voice beckon to another, "Greta, activate ze lights."
>>91580>>91581Immediately throw pebbles at any visible object that can be seen. Hopefully by that it keeps the light off.
>>91581grab onto soyswedeson to make sure you don't get separated
>>91588>>91581Acknowledge those mysterious Dub Checkers in the foreground
>>91577Obamium-987 and Mohn were my main accounts
>>91154I know.
>>91597You made a point about KYM, but you thought about coomer part too much. Also, I have seen your comment in Simp entry.
>>91595Yo, Vinluv. How is it going?
>>91792lol that is literally me but im not mgtow doe
>>92311Mr. Croat here using a different device:
I just wanna say that I am almost close to finishing 12th grade.
>>91584You take out some pebbles that were stuck in your shoe and toss them into the darkness, hoping to use the echoes as a means of orienting yourself. The pebbles knock against an object close to your vicinity, the sound of which resembles glass windowpanes.
The lights suddenly switch on, illuminating the underground cavern. Two shadowy figures stand idly behind the glass.
>>92796Call the piece of shit dave, since hes alive he should have a proper name.
He will be of great ass-istance in the future of this story
>>92796>>92798y'all chuds know it's going to land on soyswedeson
smdh at u fools
>>92795Thats some very nice drawings though, I could tell whats happening without text.
>>94820
Not on my watch, bitch.
>haha guys i saged the sticky aren't i hilarious
>>94820
kill yourself coalnigger
>>92796The urge to relieve yourself overwhelms you. You take down your pants and push out a big, smelly poo log.
The poo hits Soyswedeson directly in the face and causes him to lose his grip, tumbling down into the chasm below.
>>95222you need to save your friend. make a leap of faith and follow him down
>>95228You take a triumphant dive towards your fallen comrade.
>>95256try to avoid hitting the platform, and enter a diving position in order to catch up with soyswedeson faster
>>95266You swan dive towards Soyswedeson, narrowly avoiding the platform. You gain momentum quicker than you can control and hit the ground with a loud splat, breaking nearly every bone in your body.
>>96006NOOO! Try calling for help, since you saw some other people in the tube earlier
>>96013In agony, you cry for help. Soyswedeson flutters down next to you using the fingerboy membrane that you gifted him earlier.
>>96030let soyswedeson be your legs from now on
>>96030Check any Lab computers to try and heal the Good Doctor
>>96526Furry detector going off at this one
>>96574Because you're detecting an impostor.
>>96040Since your legs (and arms, and spine, and ribcage) are broken, you tell Soyswedeson to act as your legs by dragging you around.
>>97110with soyswedeson's aid, explore the place where you landed
>>97128Soyswedeson drags you around until you come across a vat of the strange substance that you saw earlier.
>>97150try and drink it for sustenance in these trying times
>>77214 (OP)>Starting a new thread since the last one was starting to take long to load. >>97152Soyswedeson drags you over to the pool. You drink from the vat of goo and miraculously your immortality crystal repairs itself, healing your otherwise life-threatening injuries.
Despite the good news, something inside of you stirs and you begin to not feel quite like yourself...
>>97316Ask Dr Soyswedeson to give you a medical examination
>>97323Shut up impjak feels bad therefore he should go to doctor
>>97322You ask Dr. Soyswedeson for medical advice. He replies, "How should I know? My doctorate is in Gender Studies."
A voice echoes from across the room, "It iz ze adrenochrome."
>>97367tell the voice to dilate and ywnbaw
>>97369Without thinking, you tell the mysterious voice to dilate and that they will never be a real woman.
Silence chudthe voice echoes back at you. Suddenly, an elevator door opens, revealing one of the shadowy figures you saw earlier. The fog recedes and you gaze upon who it was beckoning you to this place.
>>97418lol it funny because hes named schwab and tells people to eat bugs and schwab is a bug lol
>>97418ask the gentleman what he wants with you
>>97316P L O T
A R M O U R
Shit writing
>>97457the bug soup made him stronger at the cost of some of his humanity.
it's the classic faustian bargain
>>97451You ask the oddly enticing gentleman what it is he wants from you. He answers, "I vant to know how you came across my precious adrenochrome outside of zis facility. Zere is only one other source of adrenochrome out zere and few who are able to acquire it..."
Your stomach growls even louder than before and you feel something terribly wrong churning within.
>>97596you pull a 2 liter bottle of pepto bismol out of your ass and start chugging it
Does anybody have the "it's over" impish jak? I need it for reasons.
>>97596helplessly vomit sproke on the gentleman
i am in the process of taking a massive shit on the floor
>>97602As you are left with no choice, you remove the 2-liter bottle of pepto bismol you have lodged up your anus for emergencies.
>>97605It seems tummy medicine wasn't the only thing crammed up there, however. You gaze down at the strange being that seems to have emerged from your nethers.
>>97619>>97621you pull the pacifier out of your Soystein essential all encompassing doctors kit, and you gently open the beings eyes with your fingers.
we should ask klaus about survivors from the asylum.
we already know about soystein (You) and soyswedeson. additionally, we can safely assume that both swolesome and 096 survived, as they're invincible. arguably doctor gigachad should be alive as well
>>97968I could be wrong but I don't think doctor Gigachad was as the asylum.
>>97621>>97643Your eyes slowly open and you gaze upon the strange man towering above you, offering a pacifier.
>>98032Time for baby to make his first soy face
impimpjak seems like a reincarnation or something idk
>>98053You make your first soy face.
Fly into the air duct system and lay eggs for an impjak army.
>>98151maintain your face posture and wait for soystein to give you the pacifier
Oh alright I guess we're on the 3rd main body of impjak.
>>98184You maintain your soy face as Soystein unsuccessfully attempts to place the pacifier in your mouth.
>>98191fourth, actually:
>1. normal impjak, died to an infection in capitol reef national park. >2. tapeworm/impboy, died in the asylum explosion. >3. picklejak/impstein, still unclear what happened to it. >4. baby impjak >>98195You bite down on Soystein's hand, severing it.
>>98207greedily continue to chew off more and more of soystein
>>98210You attempt to eat away at more of Soystein's flesh, but it seems you bit off more than you can chew and he grabs you by the leg with his remaining hand.
"Hmmph, you wretched little creature. Possess me will you? And just as I was about to show you mercy..." Soystein mutters.
>>98212kick him with your other leg
>>97418>soyjak story>schwab isnt even a wojakLAZY!!!
The second version of Episode 1 was uploaded, plus I'm already doing the episode of the Las Vegas and the Asylum arc for myself.
Also, what is the Text-To Speech used in both of the videos?
Link,
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeYQfFPheMk
>>100630
the original file can still be found in the first thread
MASKPOSTING THREAD
>SotM is now Mandatory
MASKPOSTING AND SOTM MUST BE INCLUDED IN IMPJAK ADVENTURES IMMEDIATLY
>>101086unironically kill yourself kymcuck
>>101316you will never affect the impjak story KYMtard
Will this story end already?
its been five days since the story was updated
>>100604how is the video going?
>>98223You kick the doctor with your other leg, sending him into a fit of uncharacteristic rage. He tosses you into the adrenochrome pool.
>>102509Try to dive deeper into the adrenochrome, swim around and see how deep it is and if there's anything useful down there
>>102533You wade around in the adrenochrome goo using superior swedish freestyle strokes. Your body begins to undergo rapid changes.
>>102574lol i have taken adrenochrome, it doesnt do shit except a little adrenergic stimulation
>>102574attempt to surface to the top of the pool in hopes of facing soystein
>>102882
Can't speak for the others in the first image but John McCain's injury there was a scar from an operation to remove a tumor, not a bruise like in the other images
>>102933I posted is as a joke obvsly, I think lady gaga is the funnies, she just has a bad make up lmao.
>>102800You rise from the pool.
It's over, Soysteinyou proclaim.
>>103375Pin Soystein against the wall and pull his heart out.
>>103408With your strength restored, you quickly move in to pin Soystein to the wall. To your amazement, he doesn't budge.
"Hmph, is that all you've got?" he chides. Before you know it, he grabs your arm with his free hand and twists it back, dislocating it.
>>103430Oh shit, you are fighting against Soystein?! That's it your done, just let him pummel you until you lose consciousness and forcefeeds you some experimental meds, there is nothing you can do to stop him. Keeel to him as a proof of your subjugation.
>>103437You scream out in pain as Soystein overwhelms you.
Enough!cries a distance voice.
>>103444pull away your arm while soystein is distracted, and try to click it into place again
>>103444The source of the voice is revealed: it is none other than Impjak crab!
Schwab: *gasp* It cannot be! Crab 17! Greta, close down ze compound! Ve are in grave danger!
"Looking for her?" a mysterious visitor responses from the elevator. He rolls out the body of deceased Swedish idol and activist, Greta Thunberg.
Mysterious visitor: I'm afraid you were one step too late, Schwab.
Schwab: Nein! You vere supposed to be dead!
The mysterious visitor steps out of the shadows. "I'm back baby"
>>103452While Soystein is distracted from the commotion, you snap your arm back in place.
>>103454Both
>>103450 and
>>103453 are part of the story.
>>103455It seems all that adrenochrome went right through you. You let out a thick stream of diarrhea onto the floor.
>>103469You keep shitting until you empty your bowls. You can shit no more.
This is a big victory for the shit on the floor crew.
Great shitting, good job op
>>103473im not sure if that is the best idea though
What the fuck is happening?
>>103472eat trump to absorb his power.
you need it to defeat schwab and soystein
>>103473You eat your own poop.
(Y'all poopchuds ain't getting an original image for this one)
>>103939Damn, that was a joke man. Here is a real post now:
Get up and suplex Soystein while he is distracted, hopefully you will break his neck if you do it right.
>>103945You approach Soystein from behind and perform a Swedish Suplex on him. However, you slip on some of your poo and drop Soystein into the adrenochrome vat by mistake.
soot please ban the shit fetishists
>>103955attempt to pummel soystein with a swedish hook
please stop the shit fetishists
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