r/KundaliniAwakening

anyone who awakened kundalini here suddenly suffered from nerve problems, nervous system breakdown? i wanna feel less alone. Totally makes you unable to live in a normal body again, mine rised in december of last year and since then i suffered every fucking day physically. Idk if it’s the karma i had to pay since before kunda awakening i had a massive ego and i wasn’t ready for it. Wanna hear your experiences.

What are the main differences between a kundalini arousal vs. awakening?

How can I turn an arousal (that went back to dormant) into an awakening?

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For context, 3 years ago, I felt a coiled energy at the base of my spine "wake up." However, it scared me so badly--the worst fear I have ever felt, primordial and pre-verbal fear--that I asked it to stop and it "went back to sleep."
[It literally felt like it had its own intelligence like a snake inside me and thus could indeed wake up and then go back to sleep.]

Since then, a lot has happened.

I was already meditating every day, abstaining from a lot drugs, etc.

But now, I meditate via alternate nostril breathing (holds) every morning, fast one day every week, write The Work of Byron Katie every single day, go to therapy 2x/week, and I have completed 11 MDMA journeys (7 of them facilitated by a professional sitter).

The positives: I had several psychic gifts come online, mainly clairsentience and some clairvoyance. I was not seeking these gifts and only want to cultivate them in service--not as a distraction to the main path.

The negatives: mental OCD--mainly fear of doing something sexual or physically harmful to others.
[Intuitively, I know that some of this fear is not mine--it is ancestral/lineage fear--and some of it is from previous/parallel lives.]
This fear/worry via OCD is the main reason for all the therapy, journeys, etc.

I have realized that behind all the hate, anger, disgust, guilt, shame, and sadness is fear.
I experience the fear three ways: mind (thoughts/beliefs), heart (emotion), and gut/body (somatic sensation of fear).

I am super clear that a clean elimination diet, weekly fasting, alternate nostril breathing every morning, daily inquiry via The Work, weekly IFS and NARM therapy, monthly MDMA journeys, etc. is all in service to healing and releasing this fear.

So, my questions are:
- What caused the arousal (briefly awake, and then back to sleep) of the kundalini in the first place?
- What happens when I heal a critical mass of the fear? Will the kundalini more fully activate this time and rise more gently?
- Is there anything more I can do to heal/release the fear? Note: I am starting EMDR therapy this week.
- After the fear is cleared, what is the safest path to revisit the kundalini so that it is not only aroused but fully activated gently?

So, the process of natural evolution teaches us that the struggle is the key to success.

1. If i forcibly made thousands of subsequent human generations to run wildly, then at the end, what body part will be the most developed of that last human? i believe you will answer his 'legs'...

2. If i forcibly made thousands of subsequent human generations to 'do mathematics' wildly, then at the end, what body part will be the most developed of that last human? i believe you will answer his 'brain' with excellent mathematical skills, but definately not his hands or legs. In fact, his hands and legs might been shortened due to no use...

3. If i forcibly made thousands of subsequent human generations to do kundalini (and perhaps meditation too) wildly, then at the end, what body part will be the most developed of that last human?Definately, the legs and hands will be gone. But if you say brain, then really will it be enlarged or sinked? and so, the final ultimate question is - Is kundalini really healthy or a brain disaster in our lifetime?

Hello everybody, I hope all are well. I just figured I'd pipe in with a kind of report of sorts as to where kundalini has gone in the intervening month just to provide a record of what has been going on.

General Observations:

1. Energy patterns: In my case, the movement of energy begins with buzzing in the left leg. It is a somewhat numb, slightly uncomfortable, seeming 'staging point' for energy work. It seems to then travel to where it needs to go with a kind of surgical precision, and is almost always accompanied by a sensation in the groin. Then it moves, dislodges or melts an energic knot somewhere, and then returns to the left leg. Whenever a major piece of movement is going to occur, the sensation in the left leg grows correspondingly greater, as if energy has been freed up for it in preparation. These flows of energy tend to be very enjoyable the time of, but less so in the aftermath, as once the problem is dealt with in the subtle body, it is purged in the physical one- which means various ailments.

2. Sensitivity to foods/beverages: I find that certain foods are no goes. Meat has been fine, and sometimes my body exhibits a specific craving for it. However, processed treats and so on are a big no-no. I've also developed an aversion to alcohol, even though I like the taste of wine personally. Coffee is something I still enjoy, but in far smaller quantities. Outside of this my diet is generally quite healthy, so I've been doing ok. Cashew nuts are now a firm favorite. I find I need to eat a lot more in order to feel satisfied.

3. Less frequent, but occasional "UFO"-type celestial sounds: This has happened to me on two different nights, and is usually very limited. I might wake up deep in the night, when this slight UFO type noise of sorts begins ringing slightly in my ears. The first time it vanished, the second time I tried to see if I could reach out to it. I said "Come and stay a while pal!" somewhat jokingly (or something like that) and felt this immense surge of ecstatic, rapturous bliss 'grip me' for about 15 seconds. It then left, together with the sound. Then I conked out as I was tired and had work the next day haha.

4. General sensation of swooning: My body is naturally doing this, for example at work. It just feels like this undulating sense that I am being moved about from an axis at my lower spine. The spine is also generally far more flexible I feel.

5. Chatting to my family and hanging out with friends has been absolutely crucial: While sometimes I need to be alone to deal with this, I find that doing too much of that is counter-productive. When and where possible, I try to chat normally with people as well, even as I know it's hard to explain things to them. Remembering that I am ultimately just also who I am has been a very healthy mentality for me going through this, as it is gradually ramping up in energic tenor.

6. Being told I look healthy: This might seem weird, but many have remarked that (even as I feel kind of crappy internally at times) that I seemingly look very healthy. I am not aware necessarily, but it has been nice to receive the compliment. It could just be dropping alcohol though lol. Physically, I feel quite healthy, and kundalini tends to help release blockages and is balancing the body.

7. Changes to appearance of light during kundalini movement: When the energy moves through the body, subtle alterations to the lighting where I am take place. They tend to move between a kind of vivid clarity and their original appearance. It is not unpleasant, but tends to resolve once the work is done for the time being. Otherwise everything looks very much the same as usual.

8. Praying at shrine: Near where I live there is a shrine devoted to a Goddess with roots in Hinduism. Praying here has often been quite helpful in calming my worst fears and providing me with peace of mind.

9. Illnesses are less intense: Pretty self-explanatory.

10. Quiet seated meditation helps kundalini move faster: I only do it however when I am feeling physically, mentally, and emotionally stable. The way I look at it is that in meditation you can tap into the aspect of God that is the unchanging- or Shiva in the pair with Shakti. Almost in response, Shakti rises to 'catch up' to the experiences inside the meditation. So when at balance, I meditate to get a bit deeper in my mind, and Shakti comes accordingly. I find it is a very bad idea to meditate when a lot of active work is going on as it is destabilizing.

Challenges:

1. OCD-type fear of Christianity and Jesus: Navigating OCD tendencies while this has been going on have been a bit of a challenge. Sometimes when the energy is active and or in an integrative state, my mind, not knowing how to make deal with all of this, obsessively attaches energy to fears of Christianity. I tend to have a kind of anxious-kundalini resonance with thoughts of the Christian faith/Jesus, which I can kind of understand, but I know for a fact that I suffer from OCD, so these two areas are dovetailing together. It feels like my resistance is tied to a desire to control things, which I accept is a losing battle. I think a lot of this resistance is itself the cause of my consternation, so trying to accept it has been challenging. When the energy is rising and powering through the body, the anxiety tends to disappear into a total confidence that all is ok. When I am integrating and going through a rough patch, the anxiety tends to intensify. This models however -exactly- the same patterns I've had in other OCD-type experiences, so I am just working through it. I'm sure all of it will work out in the end, so while at times unpleasant, I'm not too worried.

2. Physical symptoms when processing energy: When some energy at the third eye region got 'melted' this then got followed up with a soreness in the nasal passage (where the tongue goes in khechari mudra ). Similarly, when work in the heart or throat goes on, I have a lot of mucous that my body wants to get out of my body. These purgative episodes are akin to being physically sick.

3. Resisting at all: Resistance is what my obsessive thoughts are. When ego has less to hold on with, it doubles its frantic attempts to continue to understand, think, be rigid. The secret is, and always was, to push less. I understand this is likely part of the work, but all of this can be exhausting.

Theres things we know and much we do not yet. I given my life over to this new one. And I do not pretend to know any names of things just know that I am in these things and past these things into things my dna only knows. And everyday I learn new things. The inner and outer worlds film I saw today moved me. I tried to repeat it but replaying that part could not rumble my gland in my brain again still I cried feeling a change inside me. I had managed the 2 hours barely was powerful and now I leave you with these words as my body must rest the crying release was immense and im not sure why I tranced but when I locked in wow.

Have a good convergence everyone we are in for a change.

"The ruby river carries us beyond the wheel's turning, into spaces where destiny has no claim and time is non event itself."

Mine started with shrooms from the head, wasnt until the next day that i managed to resonate. Maybe I been going a little too hard on the vibrations everyday? Now i feel like im blocked at the stomach and heart. Got all those energy stuck at the crown tenses my jaw and if i let it over run me it makes my head hurt 😭 help!

Idk if this is the right place or not but: So with the rising of hidden or previously unknown and unaware of emotions lying under the surface, I find myself having thoughts. Like with anger I’ll imagine doing things I’m not proud of to mention. Does having these thoughts create negative karma?

I am interested in what the kundalini energy is doing when it has completed purifying and opening up everything. Is it racing through the circuit at full blast permanently, flowing more gently, or does it withdraw back into its sanctum at the base of the spine?

I have had three isolated days since Kundalini began when there was no activity. My nervous system was completely settled and calm. Total peace. My mind was clear. It was magical. Might it one day be like that more or most of the time?

It's a esoteric understanding far as I know that organs above the sacral chakra also can experience orgasm.

I just feel like there's not much sharing about this in the world. It's weird.

I've also come to doubt the value of asceticism because with K-awakening comes Siddhis.

Those siddhis and all the intellectual talents that come with this evolution will absolutely not even put to work if you live like an ascetic.

I just see a lot of oneness praise everywhere. That it is THE mountaintop. An yet Im not seeing saintliness towards rest of humanity not knowing oneness. Where is the love for the human family.

Not seeing leadership qualities like many of the past founders of religion. Or new ways of thought.

So it's just been isolating and curious on your thoughts. Maybe corporations are suppressing this idk?

I know if everyone was blissed out naturally all of society would have no choice but to change. So many industries would die.

I’ve been thinking lately about how similar a kundalini awakening feels to becoming a parent.

Before it happens, you can read all the books, hear all the stories, imagine what it might be like, but until it touches you directly, you can’t really know.

In some ways, life continues just as before. You still work, eat, meet friends, laugh. But everything now carries a different flavor. From the outside, it may look the same, you’re still going through the motions. But inside, the experience is infused with a depth and intensity that wasn’t there before.

There are moments when it feels impossible to hold life in this new form. Too big, too demanding, too relentless. And yet somehow, life happens.

And what makes it possible isn’t willpower or discipline or cleverness. The only real foundation, the thing that carries you through, is love.

Mine stemmed from depression which led to wanting to manifest a better life, picked up spiritual teacher (iamray on yt) learned about the ego so I started working on that to get rid of negative thoughts and manifest the life i wanted. Picked up meditation, went from 3 mins to 20 mins. I always exercised and ate healthy since before. In all this my heart kept getting broken, so i took a bunch of mushrooms lol.

Started meditating on 🍄s and here’s how it happened physically;

I felt 3-4 intense shocks of electricity inside of my head was so entranced detaching from everything even the discomfort of my body that i didnt even react too much, also i was tripping, so i finished my day and went to sleep. The next day I’m like wait a minute that shii actually happened, i have no prior knowledge to kundalini before this, i thought what people claimed were just like imagined tingles, so i sit down to meditate and try to recreate it, i couldnt feel those intense shocks to my head again but instead my whole body started resonating like i was plugged into an industrial size generator. After that its vibrations every time i meditate and i can meditate for hours now (different sessions) and my body feels constantly electrified and basically it feels like im tapped into the source. I should be exhausted after my sessions but instead im energized. All of this in the span of a month, from the moment i decided to change to the day of.

This is what I’m interested in, trauma vs training, prior knowledge to kundalini and beliefs about it, if comfortable sharing drugs vs no drugs. And most importantly physical aspect. Did you feel what the traditional texts say about snakes fire and spine tingles starting from the base? Or did you feel something else? I felt none of that like i said for me it was just electricity to the head, my other chakras didnt even open. I get really heady and i have a hard time opening my heart chakras to let it all flow but getting better at it, also i dont gotta go crazy on the breathing i just detach and have faith.

Sorry for blowing up this sub guys, never been more fascinated by something. 🙏

I’ve heard Sri M mention them, but not explain what they are. I’ve been seeing these lights, blue, yellow, white for some time now, anyone know what they are?

Going super sayan is a parallel to awakening Kundalini. We got the obvious trauma response (Gohan/ goku/ future trunks) but the one who really drives the whole thing to its peak is Vegeta. “Then something just snapped, something inside of me. I didn't care anymore.” Only when he lets go does he awaken, this is the path of the person who is trying to achieve enlightenment(true kundalini awakening) but cant because desire prevents them. Their self perceived inadequacy turns into trauma, detachment boom Super Sayan. Anyway nerd rant over. Good day to everyone. 🙏

Places like Ancient Greece had all sorts of philosophy. These days people still talk about stoicism and while same time... they did have slavery in their society at times justifying that some people are "natural slaves"...

Marcus Aurelius a roman emperor had a lot of philosophy written.

I havent heard too much about Egyptian philosophy still talked about today. Maybe all the gems are lost to history due to invasions.

What even is it? Heard a guy talking about it on YT and hated every second of it, looks like bull to me but then again I used to think the same of Kundalini. Idk they act like they got chakras in their hands and they can move energy at will, i require so much time just to enter a resonance state, and even then i dont have control of where the energy goes before it settles, some of these guys acting like they’re Qui-Gon Jinn or Avatar

Hi I'm a beginner to this understanding of life's journey. For me I've encountered emotions at an abnormal frequency so I'm discovering better ways to balance my inertia. I'm open to meeting new friends and hopeful discoveries. Thanks for this space to openly share my encouragement.

Hello, friends! I came to this sub after watching Itzhak Bentov interview.

I had many spiritual and physical experiences that clicked when I watched the interview. I also did 10-day Vipassana retreat that was very difficult to handle but I survived and my wife thinks that it was beneficial for me.

So, I decided to learn more about kundalini awakening and started to browse this sub.

Here is what I don't understand: if so many people have negative even disabling experiences that sometimes last for years, WHY do you do it?

For example, if you take LSD and it's not your thing, you'll be fine in 12 hours (there are rare exceptions). If kundalini awakening goes wrong so often (as posts in this sub indicate) why do you people still do it?

I mean if you have no job or obligations, sure do whatever. But if you are a responsible adult and there are people who depend on you, why would you try something that has a great potential to ruin your life?

Thank you!

hi Reddit. I have had an intense 4 years- had a kundalini awakening Dec 2024 after reading about tantra

divorced 2023 from long marriage with 2yo after finding out exhusband had been serially cheating mostly with men

Full physical custody, 2025 has been brutal with the ego deaths, the void, rebuild, more voids, etc.

Have done: kundalini breathwork, reiki certification, yoga, self-devotion practices, energy work since about April

Does anyone have any hot tips on how to make it through the rest of the void? I'm struggling with the emotional turmoil of endless grief and karmic cycles while navigating full time custody of a toddler and an intense job in medicine.

Any and all tips welcome!

I have been doing a fair bit of kundalini yoga third eye kinda things! Today and yesterday I have started experiencing an outer body kinda experience. Each time it has scared me (I’ve had a bad experience in the past with this and I think the feeling is just associated with that memory now).

Yet I also want to relax into it, let it guide me! Major amateur over here! How can I not feel scared? I have a feeling I’m going to not be in control I think! I have been healing for years now and I’ve been working a lot with chakras and balancing things out!

Y

I can conciously move my energy from my head to toe and disperse it into the earth.

But how do I make sure I don't over do it?

I feel so grounded and all the excessive energy seem to have cleared out. It feels so nice to be stable.

My third eye is opening and want to see simple exercises without movement that help it open and release.

Hi y'all,

My partner has been having a long, active awakening over a period of years. They've done SO MUCH shedding of baggage, learning about themselves, growing, and changing! Kundalini isn't my methodology or lens, but it's been AMAZING and transformative for them and I'm so proud of the people they've been and the ones they are becoming!

Reading the writing on the wall, this next phase of their growth is gonna ask A LOT of them. I believe that within the next year, they will need to walk away from their home of many years, their rescue reptiles (no problem - I'll take care of the babies!), their community, friends, long-standing job, and partners.

These things are wrapped in YEARS of trauma, deep patterning, and long-shed but meaningful addiction for them. They're practically crawling out of their skin, and it's clear to me that they're going to leave. Likely in the spring.

They support an orphanage for street-kids overseas, a monestary and retreat center far from here, and have spiritual and healer connections all over the world. Any of these places could be short-term or long-term destinations. They don't KNOW yet. I'm not even sure that they fully know that they're leaving yet, but they are.

No matter what, most of their belongings - gathered over decades - will have to be shed. This will be SUCH a huge lifestyle change for them. I know it will be disorienting, difficult, and exciting. What gift or gesture do you give to someone that you love like life itself when the river forks and pulls them away from you? What sort of things make the life of a weary spiritual wanderer better, easier, or kinder?

Why am I chill about this? I'M NOT! But I'll deal with my seperation and abandonment issues appropriately elsewhere. My concern here is making sure that this perfect human has what they need in order to be and feel secure during yet another huge transition. They are exquisite and truly exceptional.

feel like everything i used to be has been stripped away and i don’t know how to rebuild myself because everything seems futile now

For mom. Om.

Hi waves. *pool splash noises*

Mainstream society as of lately (or always) has me exhausted (shocker right).

I want to be somewhere else so bad (relatable).

I live in Los Angeles like yeah good city (compared to a billion other places) but the people just are so friendly towards sin maybe I should move to Portland, Oregon IDK.

I don't have it in me to be a renunciate/ascetic because what kind of life is that.

Barely doing anything. Barely knowing anything. It's almost like you dont find life sacred to some degree so you barely participate.

Excuse my language: I am so tired of both politicians AND everyday people neither maximizing inner virtue both pointing fingers at each other.

With all the evil in the world and asking why it's there it's like asking why does a fig tree grow figs...

If goodness and badness was a spectrum, everyone is always outraged at the dark side of the morality spectrum (the news) and yet -how many damn people- do their best to be at the opposite end. Like some sort peace extremists or Buddhas, Jesus, whoever else. Clifford the big red dog.

It's the high level of disregard for other humans, people not seeing life as sacred, so much god damn greed holy crap people are not satisfied.

I am not satisfied.

Idk if should find a commune or what. I wish I was still a ignorant atheist. Im not enjoying being aware of this enormous potential locked away in most people.

I realized my true self not through intensive meditation, but by recognizing that I am not the doer.

From my own experiences, I developed a method to distinguish the ego-self from our true nature.
Since my realization was simple and not mystical, I had doubts—wondering if I might have missed something. So, I shared the method in this forum.

Some people did experience the desired outcome. Others denied it, saying there’s more to the process.

My realization happened about a month ago. Since then, a lot has changed in how I respond to life.
To deepen my understanding, I referred to the three Agamas—Shaiva, Shakta, and Vaishnava—to explore where these mystical elements arise and why.
I also searched for insights into how realized beings live after their awakening.

Based on my experience, I seem to fall into the fourth category: the Anupaya path of realization—the pathless path, where realization occurs without formal technique.

At the end of all this inquiry, one truth stood out:
Every philosophy, in its own way, helps us unburden ourselves from the illusion of doing karmas.

Before realization, we believe we are the doers of karma.
After realization, we are left with no choice but to surrender:

• In Shaivism, it is Shiva alone who acts.

• In Shaktism, it is Shakti who dances.

• In Vaishnavism, Vishnu does everything, using your little body as His instrument.

And so on.

0

During a recent meditation, I was practicing breath control—inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 10, exhale for 6. But after a few rounds, I lost count and gave up. In that moment of giving up, something unexpected happened.

I asked myself: Why am I trying to control my breath at all?
It was already happening—naturally, effortlessly. And I saw clearly that the impulse to control was coming from my identification with the mind. The breath, like the rising sun or a flowing river, belongs to nature. It doesn’t need my interference.

This realization felt profound: that suffering arises from involvement, and peace comes when I stop meddling in nature’s business. It wasn’t mystical—it was simple, direct, and freeing.

But I’ve noticed that many teachings often speak of mystical powers or spiritual attainments that come through sadhana. I understand these may serve as motivation for seekers, but my experience seems to point in the opposite direction: that even the desire for powers dissolves when identification drops.

So my question is:
Is it possible that enlightenment is not a process of gaining anything—not even mystical insight—but simply the end of interference? And if so, why do many teachings still emphasize powers and attainments as part of the spiritual path?

With all those posts about whether something was a kundalini awakening, I keep asking myself - is there any benefit to knowing the answer?

Personally, I don't think I had an awakening, but I don't really care either way. I feel things, sometimes they are pretty awesome, sometimes they are just meh, sometimes I feel like I finally realizes something... Maybe I am completely awakened, a guru, whatever... I'm not sure that it makes a difference... In fact, I almost feel like my carelessness and skepticism have kept me safe, in some way...

Those of you who think they had a kundalini awakening, how did that change your experience, your outlook, your decisions going forward? What did the knowledge actually make easier, improve, give you?

Hi,

I have started my "new" job since December and been now in this role for 9 months. It's via recruitment company and I have not a direct contract with the firm yet. At the compant I am working right now, everyone seem to be happy with me and my superior wants to give me a direct permanent contract but it is uncertain if I will receive one due to budget planning and head counts. They need to negotiate with HQ and check for next year. My contract ends June next year. The thing is, I am not sure if I want to sign a permanent contract even if I get one. The stress is too much, not enough personell, process is way too chaotic. I feel constant anger in my solar plexus and it's spreading around my body. I feel exhausted all the time. And work is sucking the energy out of me. And prana is constantly weighing me down and pressing my face and parts of my body.

I simple cannot accept this kind of work anymore (work in corporate company) and my soul cannot suppress and endure anymore. What I notice, I don't suck up to management anymore as I used to. Before I tried to play politics and game because I was afraid of being sacked. I was sacked already before and unemployed for 9 months so now I'm less afraid. Been there done that.

Now I tell HR and management directly how I feel about this company and my work and I don't shy away from telling my truth. So I think prana has cleared my throat chakra a little, but there is still alot of clearing to do.

My kundalini transformation therapist (started to see her 2 months ago) advised me to get a new job with less stress because it could burn out my nervous system. But job market looks horrible, I am not even sure if it gets better if I change. I also sometimes think, that maybe the universe has given me this stressful job to clear karma and learn lesson...(I even asked chat gpt and have provided my natal astrological chart)

I am also not ready yet to find my true career path that may be more aligned to my soul path. I am not expecting to find a job within the healing, coaching or spiritual sector, just a job eventually that isn't constantly burning me out and sucking the energy out of me...i feel like being in a rat race that I don't see point being in there and never asked to be part of... I thought of enduring until end of this year or next year so that I have just over 1 year in my cv and look for a new job, either part time or less pay and less responsibility (even this is difficult here, if ur cv is not aligned with the job u apply for, u won't get a call) I also changed so many times in short period of time, my cv isn't looking very stable. So I have to be realistic as well.

What do you guys think? Do you think stress is currently not healthy for my pranotthana or is it karmic lesson to see if I learn how to set boundaries? Would you change job or try to endure and tough up until my contract ends?

Much appreciate ur opinion and advise on this.

Thx

I'm purely speculating. I'm not saying it is an awakening. But I'm here to ask for help and see what this is about.

So 5 years ago I went through a pretty traumatic experience. I had no control over the way energies reacted to that situation. A loved one of mine left me.

Since that day my body is in fully loaded with tremendous energy to the point it is over bearing. It's almost like it's frying my nervous system.

It causes heart palpitations, insomnia and PTSD like symptoms.

I did go to the physiologists to see if they can fix me. They prescribed medications but personally I'm not into that. I have found some therapists who are willing to work with me without medications and help me heal from that traumatic memory.

But still I suspect if that incident could have led to an unintended awakening. There is no way I'm having exceptional level of energy in my system. It's too much to handle.

Its like electricity going through my body.

I'll list my symptoms here. But it's very much also something related with PTSD or some other anxiety disorders. But I'm in a place where I can look at my body without labeling or dividing anything or calling it a medical term.

• Increased energy in body.

• Tingling energy trying to expand at the tailbone region during sleep time. But it doesn't move, but I can feel it trying to expand.

• Insomnia/Sleep issues but getting better.

• Muscle Spasm for over 4 years. Has stopped now.

• Out of body Experience during sleep.

• Tingling Feeling throughout the body.

• Fire/burning like sensations in the body.

• Intense release of energy from time to time. There will be an outburst of energy released from my body and my heart would start racing.

• Trouble focusing after that incident due to high energy in body.

• Increased Receptivity and Increased sensitivity to environment.

• Increased perception beyond common knowledge.

• Random sentences used to come to my mind. Like Everything is one. Random Knowledge suddenly comes into my head. A sudden realization of some sort.

• I used to have certain kind of sounds or someone screaming in my head. It's no different from the songs that play in head. So it's not hallucination.

• My material desires are slowly fading away.

• I am never depressed because of the increased energy in the system. But the energy is too much to handle. It's like nervous system is shot with electricity 24/7.

• I did have OCD like intrusive thoughts. But they faded away after a few years.

• Increased energy flow during sleep times. Outburst of energy causing muscle spasm.

After that incident I became super existential. When she left me my mind crumbled and shattered. I couldn't hold the illusion of the world anymore. My mind lost control over the bodies energy system. My body took over ever since. It'd been exploding with intense energy. The energy is so much that the mind has no knowledge of what it should do with this. Only allowing works.

And these intense energy release comes in waves. I used to have it all the time but now it's in waves and the frequency is going down. It used to be 24/7 then once a week, then once in a month. Now it's like once in 4 months or so.

After this I started practicing celibacy. I naturally started sleeping on the floor. I fixed my diet. It all happened naturally. Almost like trying to ground myself.

Diet was a huge part. I couldn't eat a lot of carbohydrates. Everytime I had food I'd have palpitations. I started fasting. Fasting helped me manage the energy so much. I eat 2 meal a day. Sometimes only one meal a day regardless of the calorie count I still feel normal.

I didn't feel like cutting my hair or beard ever since. I felt like I should let my body do what it wants to do without manipulating it.

Sleeping on the floor is so calming and I feel safe. I cut of so many unhealthy people of my life because of the increased receptivity.

Only thing that works for me is allowing the body to do what it wants to do. Not trying to force it to a certain direction using knowledge. Letting the body explode with its energy and be with it. It's quite scary to have some much energy because that energy is so intense wherever the mind goes that energy gets backed up to that thought or a vision.

Could this be an awakening? If so is there a way to calm it down a little. I am thinking of talking to someone about this in real life. I have some centers where they help people with certain kind of meditation to bring down the kudalini for people who had unintended awakening.

Hi all, I posted this in and was invited to join this sub, which I’ve gladly done (thank you! ❤️). To preface, I’m a 35F mystic and chaote, have had a range of spiritual experiences through life, mostly benevolent and a couple malevolent, and with passed ones. Had heightened intuition since a child hence the spiritual path.

Last night I woke from a dream and wrote this down. Maybe worth noting that I’ve been experiencing good results from Hemi-Sync Gateway Experience the past week (haven’t meditated the past two days, but got up to 1-5. I’ve used Hemi-Sync before in the past). Thought I’d share as it was certainly a cool dream to experience! And despite the work I do and done on my chakras, nothing has lead me to take interest in kundalini (because as much as I know/knew, much care has to be taken if you work to initiate it yourself). So now I’m here learning more about it in this sub, thank you.

—

Dreamt I was repeatedly trying to hack into a laptop, there were other monitors, they belonged to someone named Andrew.

One time when I was hacking, I saw myself in the screen, and the man who owned it appeared in the room.

He was in funny clothes, like a two-part robe of sorts, the top white and bottom purple. His hair straight, length between ears and shoulder.

He was horizontally holding a large, flat, translucent glass owl made of two horizontal pieces/plates. The owl’s features were embossed in the top half of the glass.

It felt in a way (because I was afraid), that he was complaining because I kept trying to hack the laptop - pacing to me, following me, as I backed away from him around the cluttered room. He indicated to another computer, that he’s ‘had that in storage for 30 years’, in a he, himself, ‘should do something about that’ manner.

I realised I should be brave and face him, and see what he wants to say to me, so I stopped backing away.

Like holding a plate, he held the glass owl out in front of me, and gave me/in my hand appeared a spoon of sorts, with a long handle.

I intuitively took that he wanted me to hit the glass owl with it. I directly hit downwards with the round of the spoon onto the owls head, with a softness like playing a Tibetan bowl. It made the noise you would imagine - hardly anything.

I tried again with more force (I can’t remember if for 1 or 2 more times) and the man (who felt almost womanly now), pulled apart the two parts of the owl plates fast and screeched sharp and fast. This caused a giant wobble noise and energy between the plates, powered shards of glass flew off onto the floor with what looked like the bottom plate.

He then moved the owl plate/s (I don’t know if it felt like one or both, seeing as what was on the floor), slowly down by my spine (not touching my body). I felt the strong power of the vibration/frequency as he did this, and a molten mercury-type warmth ran down my spine slowly (maybe in a caduceus manner).

It felt like an incredible energetic massage. When he held the plate/s by the base of my spine, the energy was strong, too strong to be pleasant for the massage-sensation - I wanted him to carry on moving that energy but instead it stayed there. I felt the base of my spine be very hot, like the melting feeling that went down my spine rested there. The energy didn’t move so I guessed this was meant to happen, and I slowly collapsed front forward, onto the shattered plate, in an intuitive manner, blissfully overwhelmed by the power.

I woke up. I was lying on my front, and as per usual with dreams, I could feel the sensation from it - warmth at the base of my spine. I had a new sense of understanding for the power and use of vibration and frequency.

—

When I woke, I wondered if the man represented anyone. I studied classics at college, and with the caduceus imagery or feeling I experienced, and his A name and attire, I wondered if he was Asclepius. I’m not devout to any particular deity (I bow before every altar, worship all divine expression) but I have always had the closest affinity with the Greek pantheon. Any and no thoughts are welcome, nice to meet you all ❤️

Hello,
Recently, during a trip back to my homeland, I met a friend of my friend, who introduced me to Kundalini. Now I'm not that kind of person who believes in spirituality, at least in this form.
Usually, I try to find a logical mechanism or at least a reason for everything.
We spoke to each other about Kundalini awakening for a few days, after almost one week, Bam... I received Shaktipat from him.

It was an interesting experience, I can't say how, but I definitely felt things happening inside me.
One thing I can say for sure is that, after my experience, is that when I focus or meditate for 1-2 minutes, I can bring some sort of pressure or a kind of mass-feeling between my eyebrows.
It kind of reacts to me, and when I want, I can bring the energy to that point. I got a few practices from the person who gave me Shaktipat, and also some explanation, but still I'm not sure on which way and how I should continue, and what I should expect to happen.

I'm living in an extremely materialistic environment, and I'm not having a healthy lifetyle to be honest, I drink once every few days, not eating healthy foods all the time, and no excersises, I'm busy with my business most of the days, but I sort of managed to meditate at least 20 minutes per day. In my meditation, I can focus on my breath in a particular way, then when I inhale, I can kind of release the energy between my eyebrows for a few seconds, and after it will come back to that point again.

Another thing that happens to me in my meditations is that, after I get a little deep, my chest gets tightened a little, my hands and legs become tingling, and my head starts whirling while my eyes are closed. I also felt tingling on top of my head a few times. I don't know what happens if I continue, but I usually stop after 1 minute. I stay in this state.

I'm not sure in what stage I am right now; I'm not even sure what it is that I'm experiencing. I could really use help and advice on this.

P.S.: English is not my mother tongue, sorry for any kind of misunderstanding.

Thanks

Hello I am reaching out to ask if anyone on this path has had health issues since their awakening? It started for me right at the onset and has been going on now for 5 years. It has evolved and changed over time from one issue to another but in general my health has been just going downhill. I have heard that K really messes with your nervous system and your cellular makeup but I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced health problems through this process.

Any personal stories or stories you’ve heard of would be greatly greatly appreciated. Or any info anyone may have on this process in relation to your physical health would also be super helpful.

Thank you in advance 🙏🏼

Hello everybody, I hope all are well.

I had a few thoughts today I wanted to work out in some way, so I decided to reproduce them here. These are not scriptural per se, but have to do with some realizations I myself had regarding what kundalini might mean and be.

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1. Union of Emotional, Mental, and Physical Self

This thought struck me as I was exercising today.

In short, Kundalini is a reorganizing principle that seeks to achieve immanence/transcendence in the one experiencing it. It brings together the emotional, mental, and physical selves gradually.

What I mean by this is not merely that it 'redistributes' energy- it shifts the actual hardware to accommodate a new software. The body, psyche, and spiritual bodies are all out of whack in a normal situation, because usually built-up trauma and false attitudes 'trap' energy that should be working in a more balanced way in complexes.

This means we are often working sub-optimally. This does not mean more 'quantity' of energy is being diverted into supporting the conventional ego, but that by hoarding the raw energy of reality, it deprives the organism of its full potential. Thus, when kundalini 'rights' this by removing the sources of egoic diversion, identity crises, physical ailments, and emotional turmoil all occur as the energy not only reorganizes in a quantitative sense, but in a kind of inflow/outflow from all parts to one another.

By achieving a higher unity, physical, mental, and emotional self are all brought into One. This is when immanence/transcendence similarly become one- both greater than the unity of these parts and the unity itself.

To use a Jungian cognitive function approach, it is like a rebalancing of all the various ways in which energy is moved between the subject and the object until it works 'seamlessly'. Since the ego is accustomed to friction, this can feel like death, because all of a sudden there is no impediment. There is just 'Is'.

As my little essay here might evince, I am somebody who seems to thirst for 'interpreting' everything to kingdom come. I realize now this is because my ego is clinging to 'interpretability'. Kundalini wants to say, conversely, "You are hoarding this energy. You need to let it go to the other parts of you that it is starving." I realize that rather than fear, or overinterpret my own anxiety, I need to let it be. Do something else- without feeling a compulsive need to do it to 'fix' an emotional issue. While they say kundalini requires surrender, one can make it far easier by learning to trust it.

2. The Divine Feminine, Considered

As a disclaimer, I am not highly confident of this interpretation, but I figured I'd venture it forward anyway.

The Divine Feminine was worshipped, at least according to my pitifully lacking scholarship, in more ancient societies. Thus, it is a more primordial faith, devoted to a more primordial way of viewing the One.

In some ways, religions (as temporal manifestations of our relations to divinity, and thus ourselves and the universe) evolve historically. The presence of faiths worshipping the Divine Feminine tanked when more solar, consciously organizing, and dare I say 'devotional' in a specific way Gods emerge. I am referring to the God in the Abrahamic religions, but even Mithras.

In that historical context, civilization of a certain kind, with our current model of egoic relation to the world, society, and universe, was imminent. Thus, a form of religiosity that would allow us to preserve the ego functionally was the solution to this impending shift in consciousness. The Divine Female on the other hand, as I understand it through tantra, strikes me in the sense that tantra values Maya as a manifestation of the One as Goddess.

At least in my case, this allowed me to make sense of why I am so sensitive to Christological faith, as well as having some an obsessive cast of mind. Both of these things are fundamentally allowing the conventional modern ego to function in some way. They both 'stabilize' it and provide it a spiritual context as well. Now, as we march on into the modern world, we are getting to a kind of spiritual crisis point as I see it. A kind of internal barometer I think has been set off, as certain religious paradigms and societal expectations dissolve into our modern societal atomization.

As a result, the terms of religiosity themselves are changing. In some ways, that raw material is kind of being 'unbound' from the world view it was once allowed to function in, and as. I am not trying to say something is correct, and something is wrong- but more that a lot of energy is being cramped up, bound, and finding a lack of release. Kundalini is not a solution to this per se, but a consequence- and perhaps an essential next step on humankind's journey for this reason.

The Divine Feminine, which has been kind of swallowed up in the progression of civilization, I think, is gradually waking as a result.

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As for me, I need to stop relying on my compulsive need for understanding as much. Of course, I cannot change the fact I enjoy it- but to compulsively need to have an answer is only going to generate much pain for me. Time will tell.

I have excruciating pain in my mouth and jaw from a kriya that wants to throw my head back and have my mouth wide open all day long. It feels like someone is trying to force it open with a burning hot vice - ALL DAY :( . I am trying my best to have some equanimity for the pain but it has been a few months now.

I have gone to the doctor and all the medical things but nothing yet. It is becoming debilitating and only seems to be getting worse. It is definitley K as all these symptoms happened post shaktipat.

I am meditating - it is the only thing that really gives me "a break" from the pain.

Has anybody experienced something so "chronic" as this burning kriya? An all day the same one that doesn't ever want to stop. I can feel the energy all over but it is not painful in other spots.

EDIT: thank you everyone for all your input. Trying to stay "chill" while this plays out.

It's been 7 years since my K-awakening. I've been initiated into a spiritual practice I like and that seems supportive. However, my heart has broken in so many ways as I have fallen away from/set boundaries with so many people whose presence was detrimental to me. I no longer feel like I can make a friend or be a friend. I'm now estranged from all family members. I'm a hermit who struggles to pay rent.

Several therapists have "given up* on me, and each convinced me to get on different ssri's which I believe harmed my brain and nervous system in some way before I decided to quit them. They were polite when I described my Kundalini symptoms, but I could tell they thought I was psychotic.

I don't create or write even though I used to believe I would one day. I feel like there was no "point" to the energy waking up inside of me. I feel like I can't decode it. I'm squandering it. I wish I had a guru who could see my soul and just tell me what I need to do.

I chose "surrendering" as the post tag for some reason. I guess maybe I just need to surrender to the loneliness and to what I perceive as my own mediocrity in order to paradoxically break through into connection and purpose. Maybe I just answered my own question. Thank you for reading.

Hello everybody, I hope all are having a good day.

I first want to point out that I accept everybody's experiences are different. Coming from a philosophical background with some Jung means that I have had to begrudgingly part with my 'models' for understanding this when I encounter *bliss experiences* simply because they are meant to overwhelm entirely, but nevertheless, my nature is driven to want to express, consolidate, and understand things that are happening to me. I will list some of the more recent developments in my case, as well as some symbolisms.

1. Sensation of Bees Nesting in the Skull

At times during my process this sensation seems to strike me. It feels like bees are going throughout my body, lazily, kindly, and gently, and taking material loosened either from purgative episodes or just base psychic energy and gathering it to make "honey" inside my head when kundalini energy rises through the spine. They tend to enter through the place where the spinal chord meets the skull itself. This is a very enjoyable feeling. I like bees to begin with, and I get the sensation they're re-outfitting the brain.

2. Discernability of Pranic Motion/Kundalini as Agent and Friend

As I get further into the progress, it feels like prana is slowly coming into mind not merely as a physical force, but as having a personality. I have not had visions, speaking, or anything of the sort, but the energy feels kind, if firm. It wants what is best for me 100%, but sometimes has to subject me to my own subconscious and fears so that 'burning work' can take place. I find that I can increasingly 'communicate' with Kundalini as time goes on. She tends to react enthusiastically to gratitude and humility particularly. I perceive this enthusiasm in the form of rolling motions of the energy that feel very pleasant. I can't say more than this however, and it only really applies when I feel the current clearly.

3. Different types of work:

A. Burning/Purgative Work

So far, the worst, and most painful type of work I've encountered by far. This is when my fears and anxieties are all called from my subconscious and I am forced to encounter them. This starts as a feeling of anxiety, an internal "please don't do this"! Followed by an increasing sensation of heat, or compounded with phlogiston- as if every element in my body is being burned into plasma. When this happens I become irascible, easily agitated, like my entire being is on fire. This is then followed by a period of dull affect or stark clarity before returning to a kind of emotional baseline, which usually feels far lighter, and less blighted by the original fear.

B. Forcing/Rising Work and Bliss

What I think many have experienced, these energic uprisings have begun to diversify in feeling. Some are like borings- like a drill is being taken to an area. Sort of like energic dentistry. Another one is hammering motions, as if repeated bangings are meant to dislodge something. Then there is the swoon- a kind of recursive motion that then grabs onto something before washing it away in a flood of energy. These experiences are generally followed by deep bliss if the removal was successful, but they are not always. When they are not, Kundalini seems to retreat to the drawing board, and often this is followed by more burning work.

C. Healing Work

Technically all Kundalini does is a form of healing, but it is incredible when sources of chronic pain are utterly blown out. I have had various bodily problems resolved by Kundalini- many of them being postural imbalances in my body. Some are more noticeable, others become gradually clearer as I realize I do not feel pain in a given area. Spiritual/psychic/physical healing are all one.

4. Stuck in a Cocoon Feeling

It feels a lot like I am growing into something, and my old body and self are strangely limiting, cramped, and being consumed by something new that is not fully progressed yet. It feels a bit like being stuck in a cocoon, or in an unpleasantly small and cramped room with musty air.

Had a premature awakening or surge of energy few months ago. It was during yoga. Left me a little confused and hyper sensitive to everything. To follow was a deep intense sober ego death that happened during deep meditation. This was February 2025. The last few months have been up and down but mostly I have kept myself occupied with understanding this and grounding through yoga, breathing, meditation, and physical fitness. Have also kept a relatively holistic diet. As of today I have little inner chatter or thoughts that get caught into loops. Almost constant state of dual awareness and almost meditative unless at work having to converse or in public. Feels like I am in a dark night stage. Working towards harmony but still feel lonely or outcasted like people can sense something is off and avoid me. Have tried reaching out or speaking to other spiritual types but with no luck either they ghost or try to take higher ground and gaslight me. Any advice on what stage this could be or how awakened this could be? Feel grounded and able To surge energy at will or keep myself calm but still extremely lonely. Trying to find a group but with no luck

Over the last year I've (46F) started having increased random energy and spiritual experiences such as feeling other peoples' energy physically, feeling energy/impressions from objects/animals, synesthesia, feeling the ethereal body of others, seeing the third eye...and more. It's been an interesting, weird and shocking time. I had learned Reiki up to level 2 in 2017 and it was helpful and supportive while still mild. Because I was having these new experiences I decided to pursue Reiki more, I thought it might help me deal with what I was feeling as it was not all positive. When I completed my Reiki Master level in June, I had a period over several weeks where I experienced very intense heat in my abdomen and back. One night my whole torso felt so hot I thought I was about to spontaneously combust! My teacher hadn't talked about any of this, so I had no idea what was happening to me and kind of chalked it up to indigestion/hormones lol. It's subsided now, but it still comes and goes as more of a mild heat. I will also mention that my teacher incorporates a Tibetan Kundalini symbol as part of our training. In retrospect, I kind of figured out what I think was happening.

My questions: what do you think happened to me, is this just energy or Kundalini rising? Do you think it will continue to happen? What should I do if I want to continue on this path? Any other insights or support as to my other experiences are welcome as this has all sort of started up randomly.

Thank you very much!

Edit: spelling/grammar

Roughly one month ago I had my first major energic experience and I felt like recapping here could be useful for me. I have no idea what else to think, have been massively confused and disoriented at times, and am no doubt- green as a fresh blade of grass, but if you are willing to bear with me I just feel a need to clarify my thoughts.

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Week 1

My first brush with kundalini came in the form of receiving it as an answer to physical sensations I began having after a heavy, sustained 3 days of 話頭 meditation. For those who are not aware, 話頭 refers to a form of Zen (Chan) Buddhism in which one presses on a question that is unanswerable until the conceptual mind runs into itself- and implodes in insight, or what is termed 見性。

I had been doing this for a good 3 days- for 7-12 hours a day. Prior to this I had been reading koans, and making, in my mind, some progress, as I have always had a penchant for a-conceptual thinking. I was a fan of Heraclitus for example, so found myself at home in these theories and ways of thinking, having written a thesis on him when I was in university. My interest in Zen was motivated primarily by curiosity, but now I can't help but think that I might have been lead into this for the sake of this process.

Additionally, my mother had had very powerful experiences in meditation previously which inspired me. During her meditations she had seen, in her words, a cloud in the middle of a cloudless sky ringed with lightning that filled her with unimaginable bliss and love. This cloud was thronged with lightning and didn't last long, but left a massive impression on my mother going forward.

The first experience I had was intense- I had no idea what was going on. While I didn't feel a rising in my back exactly, it instead burst upwards through the central column of the body. It was a distinct rising sensation that eventually culminated with that energy 'erupting' out of the top of my head. Following this, I felt disoriented- but warm throughout my body, magical. I felt limitless. Somatically, this taxed my body heavily and I ended up becoming very exhausted. The following day I wondered if this was a fluke only for it to happen, once again, at the slightest provocation of the "faceless one" that is at the bottom of all reality. The energy just rose again- this time I was able to "sneak" a look at the unmoving.

It was thanks to these two experiences that I first had a series of realizations- one, with regards to the infinity symbol and the other with respect to the ensou symbol that is used in Zen. It was during this research into symbolism and so on that I encountered the term kundalini- and I felt, "this is exactly what I went through".

Now, of course, as a person with a fat and unhealthy ego, I was quite big with myself. I wanted to find ways to, ironically enough, prop up the ego with feelings of spiritual achievement, so imagine my distress when these experiences weren't always available- at least not in the same way. They would seem to come when my body and mind were ready, not when I wanted them to come. However, repeated experience planted the subconscious paradigm that I had been blessed with being part of a process, and I fed the hell out of my ego with it. This was a very important learning experience, and still is. It is making me realize the importance of bhakti, or contemplation of deities- which I am still admittedly not very good at yet.

Week 2

It was however a few days later when I had a much more "major" energic episode. It was instead a massive dropping out, rather than a rising- and I found it to line up much more with the Zen idea of kensho/見性。After a very brutal and protracted, full-body 話頭 meditation, I found myself all of a sudden unravelling a little ball of yarn in the solar plexus. The yarn was accompanied by a riddle, or small message in my mind: "Why are you pushing on the back of the pusher. Just stop!" And once I 'stopped' a massive quantity of energy burst downward- much like in the Zen sayings where the bucket fell out. This was exactly my experience.

It was quite dramatic, and for 3 hours after that everything was hilarious to me. Balls being tossed around in the park. Cobblestone. Cicadas. The sun. Everything became intensely funny, as if I was seeing it all over again for the first time. Food tasted more "vividly" itself even. It was after I had finished eating dinner and got home following this though that I perceived the enormous void this dropping out had left- it felt like a massive hole in my body.

Starting then, I had a week of awful existential anxiety, suffering, exhaustion, and fear of death. I went through waves of this purgation as the hole the initial drop-out left was still sore. I would have other strange sensations as well at times- such as no longer feeling like I was moving 'in the world' but that the world and I were one, moving together. This only lasted for one afternoon however. Gradually I began to come together somewhat, but the experience left me changed. I had moments of bliss amidst this towards the end that communicated the relationship of life/death and filled me with indescribable bliss. This downward phase would last about one more week before I stabilized a bit more.

Week 3

Yet, this bliss itself was put to an end by an unwelcome fear- the fear of religious conversion. I had gone to various Christian schools as a child, though my mother was non-practicing Lutheran and father a former Muslim. This background made me feel a deep neurotic fear of having a religious conversion that would make me Christian against my will, as if impelled by an inevitable force. Immediately, I resisted it- and it turned into a form of scrupulosity, or religiously motivated OCD. I have had OCD regarding other identity-related issues in the past, and this one seized on the kundalini experience, and hard.

I have never communed with any sort of spiritual entity, God, Goddess, or saint. I cannot claim to have done so. Yet this fear feels like it has seized me- and I continue to work through it. Throughout this week I feel like the initial wave stabilized otherwise, and have had other risings and energic 'uncloggings'. Some are more profound than others, and the process has had both ups and downs. It feels like it works on its own clock and does what it needs to do, and I have to learn not to import my expectations, inevitable though they may be.

Week 4

This past week has made me aware of work in the heart region with several energic releasings/unbucklings/unblockings. These have left me feeling slightly empty/light in that area, but I am slowly getting used to the work. My fear of conversion still exists, but I feel like it is an opportunity for growth as well. Surrender is a crucial part of kundalini, and perhaps this is how the process would like to work through me. However, I also have an increasingly powerful pull towards the idea of the Goddess often discussed in kundalini that has been gradually growing in intrigue/power in me so we'll see what happens. Sometimes I also experiment with Zen ideas and Koans and find tapping into the 'faceless Being' can yield deep meditative states very quickly, but without grounding it becomes very draining on the body.

I understand that I am very, very new to this and as a result am oversensitive to things that I'm sure many here have become quite acclimated or accustomed to.

I know it’s the colour of the crown, possibly the third eye I’m not too sure on the difference of colour. But what does it mean when you see it outside of yourself? Sort of surrounding you?

Hi everybody, once again I hope you all are well.

I recently had a pretty large energy release and was wondering what to make of it, or to hear anybody else's experiences.

As background:

- When I first started having "energic episodes" the first major 'release' occurred at the solar plexus. It felt like a dropping out of lots of material through into the ground.

- The past few days/weeks the heart region was far more active. There were several smaller releases/loosenings prior, but today I felt like I dislodged a very hard and solid 'energic lump'. Unlike the solar plexus release, which kind of felt looser, this release was much more like a solid piece. From the heart, it slowly descended downwards before slowly disintegrating in the lower torso. But it felt like some solid piece of something.

I was wondering if anybody else had similar experiences/sensations. As a result of this I feel a kind of 'emptiness' in the chest, almost like a wound. It is slightly prone. Last time I released in the solar plexus I went on to have a week anxiety/suffering, so I wonder what I am in for this time lol.

Lately I’ve been noticing this steady warm “background” feeling running up from my lower body, through the chest, into the head. It’s not a big rush or high, just this calm, steady current that sticks around. I can feel it while doing normal stuff (eyes open, walking, working)even chatting with people. My body feels a bit lighter, like there’s a soft hum inside, and my breathing slows without me forcing it. It’s all part of my self exploration that I started 6-7 Weeks ago.

When I do few minutes of Kirtan Kriya (the “Sa Ta Na Ma” meditation with finger taps) the flow gets stronger and more noticeable. It’s not intense/overwhelming, more like a quiet engine running in the background.

Since it started I’ve felt calmer, clearer, more stable emotionally, more present without trying. From what I read, some people see this as an early step toward constant meditative awareness that you can carry into everyday life.

Hi everyone, I’ve been going through something that started suddenly and has been going on non-stop, and I’m looking for insight or to hear from anyone who’s experienced something similar.

One day (not after years of training or meditation — it was literally just one day), my hands started automatically grasping and interacting with what I can only describe as “energy.” Ever since that day, it has never stopped.

Here’s what’s been happening: • Constant magnetic pull in my hands — no matter where I go, I feel like my palms are “locking onto” energy in the air or in people’s fields. • Always on — I’ve tried all kinds of “closing” methods (grounding, visualizing, physical mudras, sealing hand chakras), but nothing shuts it down. It’s like my system is permanently open. • Strong pull around people — the sensation gets much stronger when I’m around others. It feels like I’m picking up their energy automatically, without consent or effort. • Physical sensations — heat, magnetic resistance between my hands, jelly-like density in the air, tingling in my head and heart, involuntary loops or spirals with my hands. Sometimes my hands dock to my heart or lower belly like they’re “placing” energy there. • Emotions convert directly to physical energy — especially anger. I can’t seem to get fully angry anymore because as soon as I do, my body floods with heat, and the energy moves instantly through me. It’s like my system refuses to hold on to the emotional charge. • Spontaneous movements — even without breathing techniques or visualization, my hands sometimes move on their own in patterns, almost like ancient mudras or figure eights. • No long-term training — I’ve meditated or practiced here and there for a few minutes at a time, but I haven’t done years of Qigong or Kundalini yoga. This just happened overnight.

It’s affecting daily life: • Crowded spaces can be overwhelming because my hands react to everyone. • I feel like I’m “receiving” constantly and can’t stop it. • There’s no off switch — even sleep doesn’t fully shut it down.

I’ve read about Kundalini awakenings and energy openings, but most descriptions involve gradual practice or specific triggers. Mine feels like a permanent “switch” that flipped without warning.

My questions: 1. Has anyone else experienced a sudden, permanent opening like this? 2. Is there any proven way to compress or fully close these “portals” when you need a break? 3. Is this something that eventually evens out, or am I going to live with this sensitivity forever?

I’d appreciate any personal stories, advice, or even just knowing I’m not the only one.

Thanks in advance for reading and sharing your thoughts.

Or Father Christmas? I have a feeling it’s something to do with the saving and preserving of the sexual energy but I can’t be sure. Anyone else come across this before? Or mmow what it means?

Post is self-explanatory. I speak merely from a position not necessarily kundalini exclusive, but from a more general lens regarding spiritual experiences. Perhaps a better way would be to put abandoning the "attachment" to kundalini as being sufficiently explanatory.

Processes, awakenings, and so on are all well and good, but the idea that one is situated in regard to one can be a form of clinging as well, and something to be processed. Perhaps at the end it will all make sense, but at one point it is probably worthwhile to drop even the idea of kundalini, or even more generally even the idea of process or enlightenment or whatever. Dropping these concepts allows the true gem to shine through, as it were. Reification is a very subtle form of attachment.

This is something I picked up from Zen anyway. I am not advocating "ego death" in some intentional way, but the material will inevitably internally reorganize to the point that an identity as "one-who-is-experiencing-spiritual-development" will get broken down in the same way as other egoic constructs. It could be a therapeutic thought, but also scary I imagine.

Incidentally in moments when that anxiety gets me, I try to cook a meal for myself!

Jai Maa Bhadrakali. Jai Sri Krishna. I want to focus entirely on traditional grounding and nervous system stabilization.

I am not looking for commercialised or certificate-driven classes. My interest is in authentic Indian traditional teaching, preferably from recognised lineages, ashrams, or teachers who follow the original systems rather than modern adaptations.

If you know of reliable sources, teachers, or institutes that still teach grounding in the classical way, I would greatly value your recommendations.

...and also when I close my eyes and meditate it almost feels like im seeing all these visuals, mostly purple but other colors like white and red too. its sorta like being inside a tube in your body and seeing all the intricate designs and cells in your body

im not depressed cuz im lonely i cant relate to people anymore im depressed cuz i don’t want to do anything because everyone does things to feel loved but im already loved by god so i don’t want to do anything or be around anyone

Hi everyone,

About three years ago, I had a spontaneous kundalini awakening experience. Since then, I've dealt with some persistent side effects — mainly tingling sensations and tremors that never really went away.

About a week ago, I attempted to move the energy up my spine again. Right after that, I felt strong shivers all over my body — very similar to what I felt during my initial awakening. However, since that moment, I've been experiencing a very frustrating new symptom: constant watery eyes.

It's not emotional — I'm not sad when it happens — but my eyes just keep producing tears, almost like an automatic response from my nervous system. It's not just occasional watering; it’s continuous and disruptive. It feels like my system might be overloaded, and maybe the energy is somehow "leaking" out through this physical symptom.

Has anyone else experienced anything like this? Could this be part of the clearing process, or perhaps a sign that something is blocked or unbalanced? I would be very grateful for any insights, advice, or tips on how to handle this or make it stop.

(Also, just a quick note: I used ChatGPT to help me write this post because English is not my native language. I just wanted to make sure my experience was clearly understood.)

Thank you in advance 🙏

I continue to write here perhaps more often than is considered healthy, but as things go on I figure why not chronicle (within reason).

As of late, smaller moments of meditative centrality (IE, a dissipation into something akin to Savikalpa Samadhi) have been interwoven with other conscious episodes, which take place "around" the egoic experience.

The major one I had was sort of intuitive I suppose... To put it as simply as possible:

- In Samadhi, the moving, featureless, the One/Being, these are somehow, to my mind, resembling how Shiva is described.

-Shakti is the energy that awoke in response to the first episode, that was too fresh, too new, to be named. Over time I have gradually become more comfortable with this energy and no longer associate it with unpleasant disruptions, but "work" of somebody familiar, a deeper self. The more I let go into samadhi, the more this energy simply works around everything- it feels like it can reside within and with me rather than explode out and feel like a disturbance.

So in a sense, a type of samadhi-like experience triggered kundalini-type energy, is what I am gathering for me.

It is quite odd too, but as a result of this these energies seem to involute upon themselves as I acquaint myself with them more. They are desperate to come to know one another- the call for union has grown quite powerfully strong- but they are not quite one, so there is a deep sense of expectation and longing involved. Co-identity with parts of this process have also come to me at points- and when I identify as the Shakti-energy it tends to immediately co-posit the unmoving One of the Shaivic energy. That constant circling around one another is an incredibly raw and inspiring one that I am trying to live with in my waking working life. It is not too dissimilar to the constant co-relationality of the Yin and Yang.

In this way while I think reality is "one", it is accented- alive- and this life is essential, and that life is shakti. Shakti is "creativity", Shiva is "uncreated", and they unite in "creation". It is this which yields in the perfection of stability- the possibility of unity. Of course, this is merely my own experience thus far.

I am not living monastically per se, and simply eat and live as I normally wish to- as I have not felt this internal need to banish things, as of yet. Yet, at some point the fear of surrender transforms into an eagerness to be made "one". Maybe this will change. Maybe it won't. But it's where I am now.

Thanks for reading.

A very nice resource to add to As you guys know, the term Kundalini comes directly from Kashmir Shaivism and so this is a good resource to read some texts directly from the Krama lineage. Such texts are very rare in the Indian Devanagari script, let alone translated to English.

Only a couple are directly Kundalini related but certainly consciousness and meditation related.

The site also contains some Sanskrit resources, e.g. a Sanskrit dictionary and has a really nice search function to search for terms within the texts.

Enjoy

When you experienced the kundalini energy, did you feel like static electricity flow through your body. It isn't all the time which is why I am positive it wasn't a full awakening. The thing is the energy only flows when it feels like a divine force is trying to communicate with me! I can get it to stay if I practice breath work, but no longer than a couple of minutes. Let me know or ask me questions to clarify better!

Hi everyone,

You may have already noticed, that community chat channels have been enabled on the sub. This allows ongoing community discussions and postings on various topics. There are two chat channels for now, one for kundalini discussions and another one for devotional purposes, if you wish to share anything with the community in terms of your worship or deity of choice.

This is a new thing on Reddit and it is not clear yet if it will be useful, but feel free to try it out, maybe something nice will develop on these channels and new ones can be added if the need should arise.

On desktop, channels can be found on the right hand side, on mobile it will be right on top, where you can choose between the sub feed and chats.

Enjoy!

Hi I started this process really strongly I October. I’m finding my feet slowly and it a real struggle. I have gone through trauma and in abusive relationships from siblings to partners and friends. During this I realised this and had to cut them of. At first I thought was simply an empath but the event in October was so strong that I started speaking to people and it became clear that KA was happening.

Since then I’ve become more Krishna focused and started reading the Bhagavad Gita although that’s come to a standstill as my mind can’t read and process it. I thought it would help.

Now after 5 years of divorce and separation I’ve experienced more abuse and betrayal regarding finances.

I feel I’m near the end and transitioning having now had to give up and let whatever happens happen. I have no plan for future and everything I touch seems to lead down a dead end to secure myself financially. I’ve never had this happen, I’ve been pretty good at taking measured risk and making things happen.

My Astro chart says it will be this until October when things change and that I’ve been on a 30 year cycle which started around the time I married my first husband. I really didn’t want to marry him and it was on the day that I realised that.

I’m so lonely and trying to do normal practical things like moved furniture - I ah e no help. When I say I have no one I literally mean that - it is just me.

Can’t anyone help me understand what is happening? Is this how it is?

What can I do?

Update

Thank you for all your replies. I take a while to process everything and it’s starting to make sense

@hearingExtension724 - yes I’ve been falling in love with myself and I’ve accepted who I am, the part I am working on is the body, during the last 20 years I did little self care and specially the last two years it started to show on my body. I do take care now but not enough, the fitness part is lacking. And it will come.

I do have this air of confidence - I’m not someone that has had the level of confidence before. People say things and I’m pretty much listening but not absorbing it. That’s new to me it’s no longer sitting inside me - kinda gets pushed back out.

Sometimes it the shock of how little people value things and the things they speak about. That sits with me for a bit but moves away not too long after.

@Silencesam I feel and know that whatever is to come will be something that completely calms my soul. I’ll look into it but right I don’t want to confuse myself so not immediately.

Last night I felt my would just wanting to Float away with the wind and melt into the space just wanting freedom. It was so strong.

Things are changing I feel it - I think that the final Part of this may be clicking into place - I have a major deadline on the 9th that will allow me to let go a part of my life that has had me burdened and dealing with things that are not my fault

There’s been a shift in me and it’s helping me work out solutions.

I do know now that the rest of my life is very different from the past. I am Craving simplicity - and that visit to India is going to happen. I don’t know how but it feels pretty much that I’m ready for it and moving into that space.

There is some purpose for these things and I sense that this is clearing space for that.

I really appreciate the help - it has given me Great support and that feeling I’m not alone.

Like others say I could be fully absorbed into this and time would pass so quickly I wouldn’t even know and it’s the best feeling in the world of peace that’s quiet this nothingness at times however I need to carry on because I’m still here in this world and those things to be done that are practical.

I’ll post on here as things move.

Hello everybody, I hope all are well (as usual).

As I feel particularly conflicted (not out of control by any means) and in need of a place to give sluice to my thoughts, I am writing here as my own tendency to narrativize my own experiences sometimes hits a stupefying fever pitch and I feel a need to provide myself a scaffold in this way, in spite of how counterintuitive it is.

I understand this reddit is a place for those undergoing kundalini, or suspecting it, to discuss their processes. I am also well aware that in my own case, my tendency to want to make myself a kind of psychic protagonist has lead me to make many interpretations of myself that might be overlaying the more pure reality of what it is I am experiencing.

IE, I over-interpret, and too much of my mood is dependent on these interpretations of what I am experiencing. This post is no different, and in spite of knowing better I do not do better. Now, I do not feel entirely guilty in this way, but more than anything a kind of bothered-curiosity towards all of it.

The background I have to work with that is kundalini specific is that I had several specific energic phenomena occur that seemed to resemble kundalini, or other energic/vagal phenomena, in the past.

- First two times I had energic rising from bottom of abdomen to top of head coupled with initial feeling of euphoria and lightness before dissipating into a kind of overstimulated exhaustion. I had digestive difficulties, feelings of heat at times, and a wide variety of other phenomena accompany this in the succeeding days.

- One week later, deeper meditation lead to complete and utter "falling out of energy" from solar plexus. This was very intense, and while there was an even deeper euphoria, this was followed by a week of deep, ebbing fear, anxiety, and inner darkness.

- Following this period, I became somewhat "myself" again. After reading about kundalini I additionally became interested in yoga, and the concepts of shakti/shiva and all of this were stimulating to me. Since then, I had two more "rising" energy phenomena: once while walking and trying to get "behind" the face of the phenomenal self, and another when I was meditating with a mudra. I find that when I am "sensitive", that mudra are incredibly helpful at influencing my state actually and I deeply enjoy what they bring.

As many can tell, my ego is just being tossed to and fro. I won't sugar coat it, I am not quite sure if any of what I am talking about constitutes some "permanent awakening", despite the fact I've had fleeting states of many things described in kundalini experiences. It just feels like a stupid game to some extent that I am not actually playing, but making the rules up myself in order to feel legitimized as "being on a journey" of some sort. It's like a boom-bust cycle. Sometimes it feels self-evident, other times it doesn't.

I keep on making these experiences about "me" and what "I'm doing" even though in true spiritual experiences, I appreciate the fact a deep seated intelligence fundamentally works in ways that know what's best for you- and are meant to harmonize yourself, almost like a lens, with the universe. Yet it's not that I resist this, or dislike it even, but don't know where I stand relative to it, or even whether I have some sort of 'standing' relative to it. Perhaps an overreliance on needing to understand is what's holding me back. Note, I don't really mean this in the sense that I want to have an experience, but more like I just want to have some sort of understanding of what I have already experienced, and what might be occurring.

Maybe I should just hold off from trying to make any interpretations about it full-stop. That, for me, is incredibly difficult.

I am slightly familiar with the kundalini and the alignment of the chakras, along with elevating your consciousness. I have only experienced it once during a very deep meditation, but at the time, I was not aware of what was happening.

Tonight, I had an experience that I am unfamiliar with and would hope to get clarification on. I have been trying to meditate more, along with getting outside to be in nature, surrounded by natural frequencies. Tonight, I met a romantic connection of mine, and to skip all the filler information, I walked her to her porch, and I left my phone in my car. The reason I noted this is because whenever I meditate, I like to separate myself from the construct of time, so I am not worried about how long I have been sitting there for.

This is where it gets interesting. I asked her what she saw when she looked into my eyes, and after her answer, she reciprocated the question for me to answer. Although words do carry power, I jokingly told her I was looking into her soul to give her an answer, and I stood there and focused on looking into her eyes, as I was doing this the chirp and buzzing of the insects started to flood and drown out to the point where I could only remember me looking into her eyes. As I am looking into her eyes, my peripheral vision starts to go black, and the only thing I can see in that moment is her eyes. My head starts to have a "buzzing" sensation, and I almost feel as if I were going to throw up and pass out. I ended up taking a seat because I was completely out of it, and as I was sitting, the sounds around me started to come back, and I was able to regain my vision.

If there is anybody that can give me an explanation of this or help me understand I would greatly appreciate it!

Edit: Forgot to mention that once I sat down I was seeing this colored circle in my vision and as I was blinking

I’ve felt like I’ve been in a void space for a while now. It’s as if my old life no longer belongs to me — like it’s completely dissolved — and I can sense that something new is coming. But right now, I feel very much in between. It’s quiet, and I feel alone in this space. I don’t really have anyone around me who understands what I’m going through.

I’ve been on a deep healing journey for years now — working through a lot of trauma. Looking back, I believe I may have experienced a kundalini awakening during childbirth in 2020 (though I’m not entirely sure). It was a traumatic experience at the time — I went into a psychotic state, which had never happened before. I remember tensing my perineum while I was bleeding, and suddenly my whole reality shifted. I felt like I was receiving messages from people in the theatre room. It was terrifying in the moment, but looking back now, I think it changed me for the better. Knowing what I now know about the pineal gland and energy, I wonder if I unintentionally activated something during that time.

Since then, I’ve kept going with the inner work. I’ve cut out relationships that no longer served me, and slowly I’ve started attracting more authentic connections. In some ways, it feels like I’ve stripped everything back — like I’ve become “nobody” again and I’m starting fresh.

Lately, I’ve been trying to consciously trigger deeper experiences and expand spiritually. And while I feel a deep peace and contentment within me most of the time, I still long for connection — people who get this, who’ve been through similar things, or who are walking this same kind of path.

If any of this resonates with you, I’d really love to hear your story. Or even just to connect. 💛

For context: alongside my spiritual work, I’ve also done a lot of professional trauma therapy — so I’m balancing both worlds!

Hey all,

I suppose I have a curious question or two for others out there.

I have read much of Jung along this path, particularly relevant are his lectures on Kundalini Yoga - he mentions the Western psyche is far different from the East. Typically Westerners descend during their awakening, i.e., going into the underworld/ katabasis to work their way up (as the collective psyche of the West has had a collapse of symbols), while Easterners already have a stable foundation to work their through. Nevertheless, it seems even after the ascent, it has to descend.

I have two questions, one: has your awakening been chaotic, terrifying and dark as a Westerner, or was it light, calm and seamless? I hear many say it was calm, awe-inspiring and serene - I remain a little skeptical - unless individuals integrate their shadow/repressed material in a metered way for many years, but regardless I feel it comes with collapse and disintegration.

As Jung mentioned, the Abrahamic faith suffers from a structural imbalance - not embracing the quaternity, the feminine/shadow, etc, that's why collectively the West is repressed. The East is far more embracing of the feminine: if there are Easterners here, how has it been for you to work through the path, have you descended as well, ascended, etc?

Long-winded second question: it seems in order to raise the serpent one must rely heavily on Tantric and Tibetan Buddhism frameworks, as they appear to be among the only few systems to offer a comprehensive framework (I know the Kabbalah, Sufism, Gnosticism, etc have paths, but they seem to be less explicit about bodily energy and moving it through). I admit, I'm new to all of this, while I appreciate the deep symbols of yantras, mantras, mudras, invocation of deities, and its terminology, I find this does not resonate on a deep soul level with me. Because of this, I don't know where I belong or how to integrate the different systems. I worry that engaging with too many traditions at once might scatter focus, diluting the potency of the process and impeding its unfolding. At the same time, perhaps the archetypal resonance from the unconscious guides and emerges gradually, and the path reveals itself in time. Honestly, I don’t know. I'm curious about other people's thoughts regarding this matter, what worked for you, and how did you work through it, what systems do you use?

Thank you,

I feel as though my body is stuck on energy mode. Like how when you’re guided during yoga sessions. I can’t relax or be in control of my body when needed. Some moments I feel paralyzed. Others I feel like a newborn baby or a fresh teenager. I wake up aching and can’t move without being sore. Getting my blood going seems impossible. The only thing that seems to override it is my emotional outburst when I’m either angry or verry in my solar plexus. It’s like a get self chiro adjustment that makes my whole spine unlock. Then it just goes away at random when I taken a sudden step or turn my head a certain way. I’m not sure what to make of this. I recently told my mom I think we’re lndirecting getting reiki lesson downloads because I have had some healing come out of this. It just also seems to come with waves of absolute misery that I have to willling break free from.

Hello everybody, I hope all are well.

I write this for two reasons- one of them is purely selfish, and a way of expressing myself in a way that reflects where I am now, currently. The other is to see if what I say resonates with others.

I write this to talk about, what I encountered very strongly, and it was the trap of falling into a "spiritual identity". Note- I do not mean to denigrate, or deny that these things exist. What I write is borne out of a humility based on my experiences of talking myself into believing myself to be undergoing something much more important and glamorous that was really going on. This is an admission rather than an admonishment of others.

3 weeks ago I had a very potent psychic episode when meditating, and for a week afterwards had many, very palpable, symptoms/signs of kundalini-like experiences. A deep week of psychic purging, movements of heat, and neurotic tendencies flared up. However, I might have unwittingly assigned these more narrative value by

a.) studying about kundalini, giving me a false sense of spiritual advancement.

b.) talking myself into things, admittedly egged on by the use of AI as a conversation partner in lieu of actual people with expertise.

I am willing to admit both of these things reflect my poor judgment, and a kind of spiritual gullibility.

These things coalesced in my ego, which subtly converted these things into signs of being special. I have no doubt I went through something those 3 weeks ago, as the repercussions were physically palpable. However, apart from this I am learning that I need to be far more discerning with myself, and not to believe I am "undergoing" something when in reality I may be reading these experiences into things- a very real possibility given my OCD tendencies.

I am not asking to have "kundalini" confirmed- it is already personal enough- and regardless, I have had many realizations in the past weeks generally, which have given me some insight I am happy to have gained. But I realized that importing meaning into things only shortchanges what you are actually going through, by substituting it with a dramatic version.

So I merely post this here, partly for my own sake, and partly maybe in the hope it might also describe where others are in their experiences. Of course, I am looking at things from a slightly removed perspective now, which might make me overly cynical, but riding the waves, both crests and troughs, is part of what life is all about kundalini or not right?

i feel very bored of life because i no longer have the same animalistic impulses as other people i just want to spend all my time alone and do nothing

Hello! So i have been having symptoms of a top down awakening due to trauma for a while now and without going into too much mystical detail (trying to stay away from that for a bit as i focus on grounding)…im not exactly sure how to help my body/mental state along with nourishing my inner spiritual connection. Ive gone through multiple dsm5 diagnoses, and even through minor awakenings in the past i stayed on medication but i would have to rapidly be switched (28+ medications in the past 5 years alone) because it seemed like i was extremely sensitive to everything and would get many of the side effects listed even the ones that they say are “not common”. I spoke to a psychoanalyst about my experiences with medication and how i was disappointed since all of those med changes happened from ages 15-20 which are very formative years and how i wasn’t sure what to do. She informed me that many of my symptoms could very well be autism/adhd regression under stress, as well as cptsd. I figured that autism/adhd sensitivity along with premature awakening sensitivity is what added to all the medication b.s. So meditation and exercise have absolutely helped a lot but as i started actively focus on grounding, and root work, i notice im having many more panic attacks and a lot of denser emotions coming up. While ik i shouldn’t bypass it…it is pretty hard as i now realize just how much i have been suppressing and how intense my dissociation has been in the past. I also don’t do recreational drugs anymore my body seems to reject even the idea of them now. Im considering trying a milder medication maybe anxiety focused again but it is a little scary and stressful because of how difficult it’s been for me. Would love to hear from people who have similar experiences or suggestions. Thanks.

I have personally never had any kundalini awakened. But a lot of people here have experienced it. I have a lot of questions regarding the experience and kundalini herself. If someone is willing to answer my questions kindly message me.

Sometimes I just fall in to this deep meditative blankness, the body rests but it remains awake through out the night and doesn't really wake up in the morning, but feels refreshed and rested.

If I actually sleep the body feels tired in the morning and unrested. It actualy feels like sleeping normally (unconsciously) no longer benefits the system like it used to.

Is it possible that the body transforms to no longer require sleep as we normally consider it?

I read from Ramana Maharshi and Adi Da that once the kundalini rises to the crown, the next step is that it lowers into the heart. Is this correct?

I used a translator to describe my experience. I hope the context will be clear. I still don’t know whether what I’m going through is related to Kundalini energy, but perhaps this text might help at least one person who is going through a period of darkness.

After slowly emerging from my own psycho-spiritual crisis, I feel the need to share some reflections. Perhaps someone will find a piece of themselves in these words—maybe now, or perhaps in the future.

In today’s fast-paced world, we often try to quickly patch up what has fallen apart: to numb the pain, silence our emotional symptoms, and return to “normal” as soon as possible—back to work, back to relationships, back to functioning. In a society that expects instant results and glorifies constant productivity, it’s easy to believe that only the “whole and healthy” version of ourselves is worthy of acknowledgment.

But allowing ourselves to exist in an incomplete form, amidst transformation and crisis, is deeply difficult for the modern human. I’m fully aware that not everyone has the privilege to drop everything and focus solely on themselves, their emotions, and their inner metamorphosis—because life doesn’t pause for our breakdowns. I know this all too well.

I wrestled with myself, trying to balance outer responsibilities with the inner call to stop and listen—in silence, in solitude. I needed it so badly. Yet I was still a fiancée and a mother, and my family’s needs didn’t vanish just because I and my soul were at the edge of endurance. Their world didn’t stop, even though mine fell apart in a single night.

On one hand, I longed to disappear to examine what within me was crying out for attention. On the other hand, I couldn’t turn away from the responsibilities and closeness my then two-year-old daughter needed, or from the tenderness my partner desired. I felt that if I let go of my daily roles, my carefully constructed life would collapse. Yet I also felt that if I continued to ignore what was happening inside—my emotions, my tension, my spiritual insights—I would fall apart from within.

If I could describe that feeling, I’d call it this: the desire to be alone, in a cruel dissociation from mind and body, interspersed with moments of complete unity with all that is. A beautiful paradox. I called it a state “between worlds.” One where I had to maintain my daily life and another that called me to submerge into myself and into everything around me—like never before.

To truly enter into our crisis and meet our emotions face-to-face, we need courage—but also the right conditions and support. We need environments that do not rush or judge us, but rather embrace us in process—as incomplete and searching. Our modern culture often doesn’t understand the depth of inner transformation, which is why it’s so important to help our loved ones understand that psychological and spiritual transformation is not weakness, but a path toward a fuller and more integrated life.

We need a culture that doesn’t push pain aside or treat psycho-spiritual crises as something unwanted (though yes, sometimes we do need psychiatric support—and that’s okay), but instead creates space for the rupture to be experienced and transformed. I myself needed safety, support, and understanding—the right to simply exist within myself for a time. To integrate what was flowing through me.

Before opening to this new dimension of the psyche, I had encountered depth psychology, which teaches that the images and crises emerging from within should be welcomed with open arms and listened to—not treated like malfunctions to be fixed quickly. I didn’t want to suppress them, though at first they felt brutal, terrifying, and incomprehensible. They were like letters from the abyss of the unconscious—full of symbols, raw emotion, and ungraspable messages my body and awareness couldn’t yet contain.

When powerful inner images, emotions, and memories emerge from deep within, our nervous system faces a major challenge: it has to hold something unfamiliar. I compared it to trying to pour an ocean into a teacup. The teacup—your nervous system and psychological capacity—has its limits. When you try to take in too much at once, it overflows: intense anxiety, disorientation, somatic symptoms, dissociation from the body, surroundings, and emotions may follow. This overflow is often mistaken for a “breakdown,” but it is actually an expansion. What’s needed is patience, space, and time to arrange and integrate what has surfaced from the shadow.

If there’s too much content—like during a sudden spiritual awakening—the system has every right to feel overwhelmed. My own experiences came at night and sometimes during the day—in images and visions, intense trembling, a burning sensation in my body, and emotions I didn’t know how to name. It was as though my soul and body were trying to speak to me in a language I had to learn.

Now that things are slowly stabilizing, and I’m beginning to gather the fragmented pieces of myself, I suspect it was an invitation—to descend to the roots of my wounds, carried inside me for so long, unspoken and unprocessed. I won’t go into the details, or interpret it through religious or spiritual systems. I’m not assigning names or labels. I let it go. It was mine. Simply. The human psyche, the soul, and the body are layered, mysterious spaces, and such experiences can happen to anyone—regardless of credentials or affiliations.

Over time, I’ve come to feel that what once seemed like death was actually a birth—a step into a kind of wisdom that can only be found by walking through darkness, befriending our “demons,” and making real contact with our own body. Eventually, the images from the unconscious and the body’s signals became my guides, and the crisis became a gateway—slow, demanding, sometimes lonely—but leading me to a place where I could finally meet my true self, without masks. But yes—it hurts. I want to scream it here, but it doesn’t quite fit the gentleness of this piece.

Understanding from loved ones can be healing, but before it arrives, we often have to walk through solitude. As painful as it can be, I now see it as a gift. Solitude opens the door to deep contact with oneself.

Some of us feel our inner conflicts physically—in tense muscles, stomach pain, insomnia, or chest tightness. The body is like a map that records what we can’t yet consciously name. Others experience internal stirrings more subtly—in emotional tremors, symbols in dreams, or visions that don’t come to “be enough,” but to guide us toward areas in need of healing. Each person has their own space of sensing where the soul and unconscious call for attention. All of these ways are equally valid. Some are more grounded in the body, others live closer to emotional, spiritual, or intuitive realms. Some sense through all these channels at once. None is “better,” “worse,” or “more spiritual.” We each carry our own unique story and perceive the world differently, but we all live under the same sky and walk on the same Earth. This shared space doesn’t unify our experiences—it simply becomes the backdrop for their diversity.

There’s no one right way to feel. In this diversity, we can enrich each other—if we leave room for respect and curiosity about how another human sees the world.

Though spiritual insights may open infinite inner spaces and feel exceptional to some, it’s only by bringing them back to the body, to the rhythm of ordinary life, that their wisdom can be embodied. Spirituality shouldn’t be an escape—it should be a return. A return to self, to people, and to the Earth—with a renewed way of seeing. And it won’t be spectacular or magical—it will be yours. Let’s not float above reality; let’s learn to live in it more consciously and more humanely.

From my journal: “Don’t search for heaven in the distance when the Earth is quietly calling beneath your feet.”

Unfortunately, in a culture that glorifies “rationality,” spontaneous, intense visionary experiences can seem alarming. But they are often part of the unconscious speaking. One who learns to listen and understand can discover in them a kind of compass—guiding them through inner chaos toward deeper self-awareness.

Of course, I’m speaking here of internal images, symbols, and stirrings from the deeper psyche—not distortions of reality. It was difficult for me at first to accept my way of experiencing, which came suddenly and intensely. Though I had previously encountered subtle insights, I hadn’t paused with them for long.

There were moments when the veil of daily life seemed to fall. I felt energies move through my body, blinding inner lights, a sense of unity that would appear and vanish just as quickly. I remember feeling deep connection even with people I once resented—as if something inside me shifted, and the distance simply dissolved. It was strange, but beautiful. Sometimes it returns for a moment. In those moments, everything loses its name and labels. I know it may be hard to grasp for some—and that’s completely understandable. Each of us has a different reference point for these phenomena, and my words are just one attempt to describe them.

For a long time, I was afraid to speak of this—afraid of being judged or excluded—because I wasn’t taught this on my psychology studies. No one prepared me for an intense encounter with my own unconscious.

And although I still deeply respect traditional psychotherapeutic models and the solid foundation they offer, I also believe we need to expand our horizons. Psychology can and should be not only a science of mechanisms but also an art of accompanying people through transpersonal dimensions of life. It’s not about abandoning one path for another. These worlds don’t have to exclude each other—they can complement each other. Though the roads may differ, the goal remains the same: a fuller, more conscious life.

Whether we’re working with trauma, integrating the shadow, awakening spiritually, or simply trying to navigate everyday life—at the center of it all is the human being and their lived experience.

I don’t lean to either extreme—I don’t reject classic models of psychotherapy and psychiatry, but I also don’t deny what may escape their frameworks. I see the immense value of science, but I also recognize the depth of transpersonal experience. I no longer want to choose just one path. And I am deeply grateful for therapists who can view the spiritual dimension of a person with sensitivity and without stigma. That’s a blessing.

I feel an inner need to share my experience. Maybe someone—just one person—who is drowning in the depths of their long, dark night will one day find this text and feel less alone. Or maybe they’ll simply feel seen. Although this journey is deeply personal and can look different for everyone.

When the gates of the unconscious open and images, feelings, and buried memories begin to surface—not only your own but also those inherited from generations past (remember—your ancestors passed on their strength too!)—you may feel overwhelmed, flooded without a lifeline. These might be fragments of trauma, childhood fears, internalized family and societal beliefs that don’t even belong to you but live in you. When they come all at once, it can feel like too much for the body and mind to handle. That’s natural.

You are not alone in this experience. Many who have consciously stepped—or been pushed—onto the path of inner exploration know the feeling of chaos and fear. It is part of the process. Don’t fight it—allow it to move through you. You don’t have to understand it all at once. Healing and integration happen gradually—they require time, gentleness, and readiness for change that may initially feel overwhelming. But only then can you begin to see what shaped your choices, behaviors, and reactions. And that is a beautiful opportunity. Because what is brought to awareness can finally be embraced, worked through, and transformed. You have a choice. You can turn lead into gold.

Every experience draws me deeper into myself, uncovering layers that were previously hidden from view. Emotions become signposts, revealing parts of me I hadn’t seen before. When I allow myself to truly feel them, memories resurface—vivid and meaningful. What was once unconscious becomes visible and familiar, and once processed, those emotions no longer hurt—they begin to teach. It’s like connecting dots on a page—each emotion and memory clarifies the bigger picture.

Building strength is not about avoiding pain but being willing to face it—just as I open myself to joy and love. I’m learning to accept the ebb and flow, the light and the shadow—just like nature, which continues in its cycles with patience and wisdom.

And so, my garden became a gift during my solitude and integration. A place free of expectation, patiently grounding my experience. My body intuitively knew it needed the Earth—a place where it could safely fall apart. As I write this, I look out the window and remember lying on the Earth in my garden, my body trembling as if it were releasing all the tension of my life. Literally.

How deeply I needed to know that this trembling was part of healing. That everything was trying to return—and is returning—to its original balance. That wasn’t the first time I experienced such a physical response. Two years earlier, I lay on the bathroom floor under two blankets, freezing, trembling all afternoon. But back then, I didn’t need to understand it. I now know the process started long before, and I have no idea what lies ahead—but I’m learning to accept it, with all its unpredictability.

In the garden, I watched the bushes, unhurried in their blooming, unashamed of withering, unafraid of storms. They knew what it meant to die and be born again. I felt like a tree—after deep rooting in the darkness of the Earth, slowly reaching toward the light and sky. I had to face what was dark in my soul to begin discovering inner strength and healing—to return to my foundation and dark roots.

Recently, while watching tall trees bend under strong winds, I wrote in my journal: “When you care for your roots, you can stand tall even in the strongest wind. The Earth will hold you—because you have made it your home.”

Sometimes the wind is too strong and breaks branches or the trunk, but some trees, deeply rooted, begin to grow again. It’s the same with us. If our roots reach deep into truth, tenderness, and inner work—even after breaking—we have the strength to grow anew. The break won’t magically disappear—but we can receive it with awareness, humility, and openness to life’s eternal dance.

I’ll leave my relationship with nature and its wisdom for another time.

Please, let us as a society give ourselves the right to fall apart, to accept and offer compassion during crises. To be in process, in chaos. It’s okay not to know who you are or where you’re going for a while. Let us allow space for stillness and for weakness—not as a flaw, but as a human truth and part of our experience.

We don’t always have to be strong and “on top of things.” That illusion of constant control is a heavy burden many of us carry. Let us open to suffering and listen to what it’s trying to say. It may scream in the language of emptiness and fear, but beneath every cry is a call to come back home—to yourself.

Only when we have the courage to look our shadow in the eyes can we truly understand what light is. On the foundation of crisis, our journey toward a new form of life can begin—more attuned to our emotions, more deeply rooted in presence. These are the rare, beautiful moments when we truly exist in the here and now.

You’re driving home, and suddenly you stop on a gravel road, quietly watching a young bird learn to fly. It’s uncertain and trembling—but aware of its strength and freedom.

I tear up—because in its struggle, I see myself.

Trust the process.

Hello everybody, I hope you are all well.

I believe I am going through what is termed a kundalini awakening. I had no idea about the term prior to my experience meditating a week ago, but here we are. What happened was:

- Sustained Rinzai Zen meditation caused two upward surges of energy towards from bottom to top. This felt 'incomplete' but ecstatic, euphoric.

- The successful one, because it was different, came when I solved a riddle pertaining to the ego, and then had a massive 'dropping out' of content from my solar plexus down and out through my body. Major release.

- Since then, I had many episodes of emotionality and anxiety that have boiled through me. These have been tackled and I'm still getting clarity on some, others have been easier. Some moments of bliss and clarity, others of very difficult to manage identity crises, like this one regarding religious conversion.

However, I have somewhat of a fear of religious conversion. Through this process that fear (and earlier many others) were intensified- though I've always had this fear to some extent. I don't know if kundalini is trying to tell me to convert to be honest to who I am, or if this is a blockage- and the fear is in reality a kind of energic block that is being processed with religion at its center. Basically, when I am in a fragile emotional state I get hot and sweaty, burning internally. However, kundalini definitely mirrors a LOT of what I'm going through.

I would describe it as the feeling that religion would provide 'acceptance' for a kind of wounded child within me. Kundalini has already awakened me to the unity of life and death and God in some ways, but I don't like the idea of being denominational. I don't know if this is silly of me. Or perhaps it is not converting itself that is the issue, but the clinging to that identity that is in the way. I don't think being, the One, or whatever you want to call it is reducible to one faith, especially after these experiences, but a part of me is incredibly anxious and unsure of how to process this.

I am also aware of the fact that I have had OCD on other topics before, and this has some similar features. I am not going to throw that out the window.

Just wondering if anybody went through something similar, and if they had any advice.

I am asking myself questions about what I will become and what I should do of my life once things become more stable.

It's unclear to me what is the standard kundalini experience. Some people describe their experience as the death of their old self, implying a total psychological overhaul, whereas for other it seems more like a removing of some layers, with a continuity of most of the personality, but in a purest form.

So for people who are further along the path than me, did kundalini make you do what you deep down yourself you were always mean to (like using an innate gift or following an innate passion, a path you always wanted to follow but that life circumstances prevented you from following until your awakening) or rather, did it makes you follow a totally unexpected path, expressing qualities and interests you never thought you had in yourself?

Hi everyone,

In the past few days I had to remove quite a few comments and posts that were about suicidal ideation and mental health struggles.

We are getting to the point, where posts and comments of this type are disruptive and don't serve the community at large.

The mod team is trying to keep a balance and minimize censorship as much as possible, on the other hand it doesn't serve the Kundalini community well if people are mostly posting about various mental health struggles.

I'm of two minds about this. On the one hand, people undergoing Kundalini process are often struggling with their mental health. I myself had to endure a period of panic attacks and mild agoraphobia, as a result of my inability to be in crowded places or amongst a huge number of people, due to my heightened sensitivity.

On the other hand, way too many people who are schizophrenic, psychotic, manic depressive and so on jump to the incorrect conclusion, that their condition has been caused by Kundalini. It is not unheard of for Kundalini to exacerbate such conditions, however these illnesses often have underlying physiological causes, which may even be genetic. Another overlooked factor is diet and lifestyle. Research seems to indicate, that gut microbiome, which is heavily affected by diet and lifestyle, plays a huge role in depression for instance. Some people, clinical psychologists included, have reportedly completely cured themselves of their depression just by switching to a radical diet. I only bring that up as an example of how we often don't understand where mental health problems come from and prematurely jump to incorrect assumptions.

This affects Kundalini in particular, as it is frequently used as a scapegoat for all manner of ills. The demonization of Kundalini has become a serious problem and it seems to originate in radical religious movements. Just do a reddit wide search on this topic and you will find hundreds of posts and comments attempting to smear Maa Kundalini,

Religious fundamentalists tend to stay in their own corner and don't come over here to cause trouble, yet the generally negative discourse on Kundalini is affecting every discussion and community that deals with it. It is incumbent upon us to combat this tendency and push back with truth.

My objective here is not to suppress discourse or diminish people's mental health challenges. But it is also a fact, that we are not clinicians here and cannot offer responsible psychiatric advice to mostly anonymous people on the internet. Anyone facing mental illnnes challenges should get seen by a professional and receive the treatment they need.

Of course the difficulty here is how to be delicate about it and not invalidate people's lived personal experiences. I haven't yet found an answer to that, for now I will proceed to remove mental health content that is not directly relevant to the Kundalini discussion and is clearly a case of spiritual bypassing, whilst trying to accommodate those, that are facing mental health challenges.

I welcome any suggestions if you see this differently and think we should take a different approach.

The title basically, how did you awaken your kundalini? What was the main differences in your life and mind before and after the awakening?

I was in my B.Tech when i started chakra meditations. Waking up at 3am and trying consistently helped me experience something none of my friends could relate with.

I started to feel my chakras and could visualise energy moving from bottom up.

Next started dreams of visualising indian gods. First ganesh ji and parvati maa, next night golden shivling with peacock feather.

I felt heavy on third eye chakra region and could sense increase focus.

But, i couldn't stop few habits of mine like masturbating which then led to a dream where i was in a temple, couldn't move, and i saw a woman in white running towards me with a sword and suddenly she swung the same at me but some other lady on the side pulled me and saved me but a thread was cut.

Since then i haven't been able to sense my chakras. Can someone pls help explain?

I need some serious help. I’m having an actual spiritual emergency. No doctor could help me. I think I’m undergoing kundalini psychosis and I feel like I’m dying every second. I feel like I can’t breathe, like I can’t think straight. I have a daughter here at home and I can hardly take care of her because I feel like a psychotic mess. I can feel my soul trying to be sucked out of my body. This all happened after doing some shadow work and I had a huge identity crisis, and felt detached from who I was and this world. I feel like I’m dying every second over and over and the fear of death is horrifying. It won’t go away no matter what I do. I’ve never felt this level of fear in my life. I can hardly eat and all I do is throw up.

Anyone reach a state of void and deep silence post dark night of soul stage of awakening? I no longer feel the bliss I first felt and I’m also unsettled by the fact nothing is happening. I just spend all my time wanting to be completely isolated and not do anything and not participate in life. It’s kind of peaceful but extremely boring

Some time ago I started to feel a burning feeling at the base of my spine and occasionally my eyes burned like crazy. I didn’t pay much attention initially, but it seems that more breathing techniques I was doing, the stronger it got. Didn’t get all the way to the end because I got little busy and took a break. So I was wondering which technique you found most effective for you? And the only one I know so far if Breath of Fire. What I did was Pranayama and Nadi Shodana.

I have lost the old egoic urges to prove myself to the world and achieve something. doing anything seems like a purposeless endeavor

experiencing flashbacks of trauma that i hadn’t thought about after the dark knight of the soul stage of awakening. i think it’s bringing them up for me to process them? it is really hard to do though. how to make it stop

FYI - This is long. Not sure anyone will read it all, but just need to share my story. TL/DR at the end.

In 2017, I was told by a co-worker about the movie, The Celestine Prophecy. This co-worker said they were an Indigo, and could see things. I didn't really believe her, but would talk to her about different interesting things. She told me "my teacher told me the movie shows what it's like, when you see things"

I searched online and found a website dedicated to the book/movie. The website mentioned synchronicity, and that was the first time I had ever heard of the concept. While on the website, I read 3 articles that directly related to things I experienced that day. My interest was piqued, and I felt strange on the way home.

I told my roommate about the experience when I got home, and he then told me for the first time that when he was younger, he thought he would feel and see his grandmothers presence in his room. I was never interested in any of these types of topics before this day. I was pretty lost and depressed back then. My parents died when I was young and as I reached college graduation time, the loneliness and lack of support really hit me. I should have been excited and hopeful for the start of my life, but instead I shut down and isolated myself from the world. I was not interested in spirituality, meditation, or self development. I was just fighting to get through the day.

After that day, things changed. Synchronicities kept following me. Signs, license plates, a sound bite on a passing car radio, books I found on the ground, etc. I felt like the universe was talking to me.

Somewhere during this time I decided that there was something else out there, and maybe it's calling me. I started getting into meditation, yoga and other stuff, like vibration.

One day before meditating, I got a curious idea to create a low, rumbling, noise (almost like a lawnmower engine humming) using a beat maker machine. I put on head phones, played the sound, and laid down to meditate.

During this meditation, I suddenly started to feel as if I was falling upwards. Like there was a G-Force pushing against me. I was laying still, on my back with my eyes closed, but felt like I was falling up. Instead of falling and moving through space, it felt like space was moving through me. Then, I felt electrical currents going through my arms and legs. It wasn't subtle. I also felt the dark space inside of my head expanding and my thoughts seemed to echo. I then felt a presence inside of my head, and communicated with it. At first i thought it was my parents. I told them "im sorry" and immediately felt a rush of love and acceptance. The response was "no no no, you do not need to be sorry". After a while the presence seemed to no longer be my parents, but someone else. I communicated in my head with this presence and asked it other questions. (I'm not sure if there was actually another presence, this is just how I felt at the time.)

A day or two later, I did the same routine. Play the rumbling noise on my drum machine, put headphones on, and laid down to meditate. During this meditation, I felt an electric shock in my forehead, in between my eyes at brow level. I then felt what I can only describe as a brain orgasm, as currents flowed through the grooves of my brain. It was so intense, that I had to begin maniacally laughing, almost as if to release something from my head. Then, my spine involuntarily arched, and I felt electricity in my spine. I rolled off the couch I was on and writhed around on the ground, maniacally laughing, with my back arched. Glad none of my roommates saw.

Needless to say, this experience changed my view of the world and my place in it 180 degrees.

A short time later I was sitting outside with a friend. I reached out to a leaf of a plant that was hanging down over a fence. Just as my finger tips reached a leaf, I felt a connection go through my finger, and then again felt currents moving through part of my brain, although much less intense than before.

These experiences happened over the course of 2 or 3 weeks, and in between them many others. In the interest of post length I'll list a few -

Dreams - intense, vivid dreams. Things like floating upwards, moving through the different colorful worlds with strange animals, people walking on water, lots of UFO dreams

Sleep Paralysis - I felt 2 hands grab both of my arms, the hands felt charged with electricity and held strong. I was awake but couldn't move.

Hearing things - during meditation, in my right ear, where my mastoid process is (the bony part of skull behind the ear, I heard music. Very pure sounding piano notes.

Eye Floaters - I developed CRAZY eye floaters (at first I thought I was seeing energy, but nope, just floaters)

In trying to figure out what was happening, I came across Kundalini. It was the only thing that could explain the electricity running through my body and head, the involuntary back movement, and the shock in my forehead.

For a time after this, I was dedicated to studying kundalini, doing yoga, meditating, and all around self development. But fast forward to today, and I'm kind of in a spiritual rut and don't know what to do anymore. I haven't meditated or done yoga in 2 years and not exactly in a good place. Not bad, just apathetic. The point of this post was to just get this off my chest, and hopefully some kind folks can offer guidance or just simply conversation.

These experiences happened in Los Angeles and I'm now back living in Massachusetts.

TL/DR

Synchronicities turned me on to meditation

During meditations experienced electrical currents flowing through my arms, legs, spine, and brain. I also felt an electric shock in my forehead, between my eyes at brow level. Involuntary spine arching. Then came vivid dreams, sleep paralysis, auditory hallucinations, synchronicities, eye floaters, and feeling as if the inside of my head was expanding

Sharing my story to get it off my chest, and see if anyone else has similar experiences.

Hey everyone, I have a question. I started meditating about a month ago, clensing and activating 3 chakras so far... I now have a feeling I can create in my body. Starting from the center. It shoots up my hand and legs. It feels electric.. Almost like my body Is hovering or something. As long as I'm focused on it, it doesn't stop. I can now hold the feeling longer and longer. It feels really good. What is it?

I had a dream the other night like I was in a universe room a chakra snake came out the wall and I inhaled it instintcly then I felt the room moving up.like the next level and the room was a green and pink room and I inside I thought I'm having an awakening and panicked and woke up and I instintcly rember because every night I actively try to get messages in my dreams but either dont dream or rember so wen I rember I take note now I'm peeved because did I just ruin my awakening from fear or wat.

Hey i was just curious what to do after the energy goes silent. I had an experience in 2023 where the kundalini crescendoed at the crown chakra and i had a large awakening experience full of bliss and love. Now 2 years later that experience has come and gone., now the energy is very quiet/nonexistant and im left with pains from the third eye/self inflicted wound around that area. Since then i havent felt any upward energy or bliss at all. Life seems rather normal and i feel lost, what was the point if im just left in this blissless void alone with this pain? I dont feel any connection to the divine anymore in any really overt way. I feel disconnected. Just why? Any advice would be appreciated, please dm me i would love to have someone to talk to , blessings and love💚🙏

I feel like I have much more awareness and much more control over my ego and I was able to either ignore it push it away or not let it overwhelm me. Now however, I can feel this feeling sometimes pain in my chest around my heart centre, anxiety it’s like it’s come back with vengeance. Is this normal? Are they just under the surface of emotions that come out afterwards that you have to deal with and if so how do you deal with them? Because I am really struggling with this anxiety, it’s like I’m all happy and divine one minute and then I’m anxious strange person trying to work out how to be a person the next minute.

Whilst meditating today I had a realization about the nature of insight. Perhaps it was only new to me, but just in case you haven't realized this yet, I'll share it with the community.

There are two kinds of sight. One flows and is directed outwards, we could call it outsight, though normally we just call it sight. It is what enables us to perceive and process sensory input from the outside world.

Although most scientists assume it is merely about receiving photons into our retinas and the brain processing that info to create an image in the mind's eye, it is in fact a two-way process. Some scientific breakthroughs seem to support this, as the very act of observation does in fact lead to change on the quantum level and this at any distance, instantaneously. So, by looking at something, we don't merely observe, we also fundamentally change the nature of the thing we are observing, we lock it into an outcome or state that was indeterminate before we looked at it.

This is probably why living beings can sense when someone is looking at them. A fact well known by hunters, who always avoid looking directly at their prey whilst they're stalking it, lest it be startled. Oxford don, Dr Rupert Sheldrake, wrote an entire book on the phenomenon, The Sense of Being Stared At, which I would highly recommend.

But, that's just one type of sight. The other type is insight, which does not flow or is directed outward, it is an inner sight which goes within. The organ responsible for insight has been variously known as the third eye, the eye of Horus, the single eye (biblical term), inner sight and ajna chakra. There are probably many more.

This organ is part of the subtle and physical makeup of the brain and its main function is to discern truth, but it also allows us to literally see, that which is unseen or hidden. It is what is responsible for remote vision, but also hallucinations and various psychedelic experiences. Its functioning can be pathological, as during a psychotic break or a schizophrenic episode, but when working as intended, it allows us greater insight into the nature of reality and how things really are.

We can see realms normally hidden to us, we can see inside of ourselves and inside of others, especially on the energetic and emotional level, an ability healers have used for millennia. We can see energy, which is the main way this "other" sight functions.

Energy is everywhere, all around us, inside us, and others. Those with this sight can sense energetic patterns universally and draw conclusions based on what may look like mere intuition, but is in fact an inner vision, with an eye that is hidden deep inside the brain (the pineal gland).

A significant function of Kundalini is to interface with this hidden organ of inner vision, to energize, wake, direct and sustain it. By practicing Kundalini, you are enabling a higher wisdom and a higher vision to guide you.

People often ask us on this sub, what the whole point of Kundalini is. Well, there are many uses, but this is a major one. By activating and waking your inner vision, you will have more insight, into the nature of reality and your discernment of the truth will be sharpened. It's much harder to fool someone and pull the wool over their eyes if their vision extends beyond the physical and into spiritual and divine realms.

1 experience -

I am sensitive to kundalini.

Being sensitive to kundalini means, being sensitive to sensitivity.

One of my sensitivities, I discovered today is 'fear' of losing what you have. We all have fear of losing what we have - including money. It is fear of losing all our accumulated wealth. Be, it cash, your apartment, your car etc,

Today, I experimented upon myself.

I have been surviving on minimalist money from past few days. I had just a few rupees in my wallet (I am from India and currency is Rupees). at the same time From past few days/weeks, I had been feeling blockage. I had been feeling a blockage around 4 areas - navel, chest, neck, and eye area.

I had been receiving flashes (like sudden mental flash or an idea in my head), - something tell me, to get rid of money from past few days, which I had been deferring from long time back.

Kundalini is a friendly energy. When one is sensitive to kundalini, the kundalini gives auto-suggestions, in many forms. One of the form is flashes -or- sudden idea -or- intuitions. (sometimes, people fail to describe this - this is purely an inner process - you can expect others 'not to' understand this.

Suddenly, yesterday, I gave away all the money, I had I gave it to a random person. I handed over all the money. This resulted in an empty wallet, which meant surviving on nothing until, I get my next salary in few days/months.

Also, I do not use cards ( any sort of cards)

**

The moment, I did this, yesterday, I started feeling a burst of energy, and felt the blockages clearing out around chest and neck area.

This was a blissful experience. It still is.

This was an experience worth sharing.

You do not get to read such experience in books often.

Thus Sharing this experience here. Any volunteer, wants to give this a try, may try, and validate this, is welcome. if they feel the same, may connect with me.

lots of love,
Kashish Bhasin
(India)

would appreciate if there is someone i can talk to about my experiences? any help is appreciated. i dont feel lonely but my experiences makes me feel alone.

Previously, over a year ago I was experiencing Manny symptoms of kundalini. Thank you, mother goddess. Now after taking up my practice again for a number of months I had a full blown experience where I became aware of the energy and then with divine guidance moved up my spine and into my head. This is the first time I became super aware of everything and I went back to the realm of the divine with the gods. This time however I felt like I wasn’t worthy and I felt like I didn’t deserve it for some reason and it wouldn’t stop every time I close my eyes. I could see the divine realm and then geometric patterns. Now that I’m a bit more clearer and now that I understand myself better, I want to go back and see them and develop it further. So I have two questions , one is after the experience. Does it change people forever to the point where they stopped their practice and that’s it? They’re done? And also, can I keep raising the k the way I did before and that’s all healthy and safe? Thanks

Kundalini awakening is no joke. Everything changes. Your whole experience of the world is different. Your experience of life, of energy, all phenomena is different than it was before, and there is no going back. Relating to the old “you” becomes an increasingly uphill battle—friends, people, your way of relating to the world have all shifted, and as much as you try to pretend that you are “normal” the fact is that you are not. Not better, not worse, just different. It is like a machine running on different type of oil, one that’s much denser, more volatile, much more beyond your control. There is a force of nature playing out within you—through you—and trying to stop it only makes things worse.

This experience is lonely. Relationships, hobbies, old patterns—things that previously brought you joy (or so you thought)—now seem draining, polluting, too dense for your energy body. Social outings feel like standing behind a dump truck with the load slowly filling the space around you. It’s only a matter of time before you have to leave and “cleanse”—which requires more alone time than is healthy for a human person. Hoping that there is just one person out there who could energize you rather than drain, someone who resonates, someone who “understands.” But it seems like there is no one, so you are forced to play the role of your old self, like an alien who’s been dropped in this human body, with this set of memories, trying to figure it all out. Like you’re a character in a movie that’s pre-scripted, except you’re the only one who knows it’s a movie.

Please resist the temptation to read this post as judgmental. I am certainly not “better” or more “enlightened” than anyone else. By human conceptual standards I am most likely the opposite, because I can’t relate to my old life or my old ways of being, and I have to spend my time doing “woo” things like pranayama and mediation and a whole host of cleansing rituals. On weekends when others are out socializing, sometimes I just sit at home and let the energy work its way through me, because that’s when it’s chosen to become active. As a result, friendships are falling by the wayside, relationships with family members are fracturing, and trying to make new friends is exhausting. I wish I could say that this is all by my choice, but actually it’s not even a choice at this point—my body simply won’t let me be around certain people or environments anymore.

Those with awakened kundalini are still humans, and we still have needs. One of the most important being human connection, love, union with others. Where I am currently in my path feels like the doldrums—dead space in between the shedding of old and the rebirth of new. But man is it lonely in the meantime.

Thanks for reading.

Creativity always came natural to me. I’ve been a music composer since i turned 5. I wasn’t ever able to define where it came from or dint know much of theory. Yet i could just compose picking up instruments. It’s only recently when i accepted this, at 30. Always a people pleaser and kept others before me, ignoring and sidelining my needs. I have had immense concentration and focus when working on music or practicing drums, my primary instrument. In 2020, i ended up composing around a hundred songs. I never knew what i was doing. I never released. Just creating gave me enough pleasure. But now when I retrospect, i realise that the most honest of compositions dint ever come from me. It’s like someone comes and give them to me. Always an introvert and introspective, I’ve been pulled towards God since i figured as a teenager that sound is very close to what we call god.

Things started going a little haywire when i started seeing synchronicities everywhere. My inner world, my thoughts all of then started showing up in my outside world. I couldn’t ever discuss it with anyone, thinking they’d call me crazy but the signs kept getting bigger and bigger. I started practicing meditation and (drugs were involved), i was reckless. I lost every possible friendship i had. It was like people broke off with me based on my thoughts and not my actions. Nothing made sense to me till i read the autobiography of a yogi. Life was constantly signalling me to sober up, while everyone was constantly intoxicated in my line of working.

I have sobered up and I’m lucky to have found a meditation group recently. Also been going through this sub and after going through it, i came to the conclusion that I’ve misused my kundalini, unknowingly. I have sinned, i have ignored my needs and lost years smoking. I have repented and regretted. My brother is autistic and he’s closest to me. Animals seem to be really attracted to me if i touch them(We have many street dogs here in India).

Everyone told me i was a gifted child, weither it be my eyes or the natural curls i have. Yet, i never believed in myself. I despised myself and ended up being a cynic.

I feel immense energy rising on my right side brain/temple and my neck/back feels really heated up sometimes.

I am lost, i want to feel my empathy again and get back to love. Because i believe my purpose here is to spread it with my music. I am scared of my thoughts because I’ve experienced them manifesting instantly sometimes. Any advise? (Thanks for going through the super long adventures of my life hehe)

Looking for some answers. I'll try to keep this short, I'm a 40 year old male, I've never really been spiritual (No meditating or anything) other than watching random spiritual tiktoks and Dolores Canon videos here and there.

Around 2 months I was really high from weed (I have since stopped smoking) and I had this weird experience where I sat down on my couch and my body kind of shut down in a way, and my eyes started scanning the room but it wasn't smooth eye movements. My eyes would quickly jump from looking at one thing in the room to another, it was very strange and it felt like my soul was looking out of my eyes.

After this I had an incident where I tried meditating in the forest a little bit and I opened my eyes suddenly and I went into this weird "soul eyes" state.... I kept looking at the small stream of water that was moving and the patterns that the water was making, my thoughts were like drowned out (my thoughts were like on lower volume and were almost like an echo....super weird feeling I felt like I was on drugs) , and then my right hand started tingling really bad for a while which kinda scared me cause it wouldn't stop.

Since then I can get into this state relatively easily by doing some deep breathing, and these are some of the things I will feel/think during this state: Thinking about how the patterns in nature seems so amazing, especially on leaves or tree branches. Thinking simple thoughts like this is so beautiful and amazing , or repeatedly thinking I love you. Being in awe

During these experiences my face will make real akward gestures that make me feel like a fucking gorilla lol.

Now this weird feeling today is spreading to my jaw , I will open my jaw and close it sometimes because it feels good and kinda weird doing this.. Almost like I feel some kind of energy when I fully open my jaw. Or I'll stick my tongue out, or make these weird ugly expressions with my face, and I feel this weird sensations in my face (I think it's energy)

Also this soul eyes feeling comes on its own sometimes if I view something very beautiful in nature, or if I read something that seems truthful and deep.

Any help of wtf is going on would be appreciated, Thanks!

Hello, I am in Phoenix Arizona and have been dealing with symptoms from my awakening for several months now - neurological, psychological, sleep problems, nervous energy, the lot. I was wondering if there are any others who would be interested in meetups, where we can talk to one another about our subjective experience of this with others who understand. Too much isolation isn't good, awakened or not.

I thought I'd share a small insight on the nature of the ego (ahamkara) vs the higher self (atman). I see a lot of confusion on this topic, so I think this needs a bit of clarification.

Essentially, the voice in your head is your ego. The observer, the one listening and being influenced by the voice is the higher self. That is the real you.

You might identify yourself with the ego, thinking it is your thoughts, that you are the one thinking and feeling all these emotions. But that is merely a construct, one created mostly by outside influences that you have little understanding of.

All those scoldings, bad words, people telling you, that you were deficient, or perhaps the opposite, that you could do no wrong. Your ego was built up by others, you had very little say in the matter.

So, recognize the true nature of the ego and rest instead in the "I am that"-ness of the higher self, which doesn't judge, think or emote, it just observes and "is" without participating in the drama of life.

that's all

In the last month or so, I have had a lot of spiritual insights. I experienced a non dual state, the veil of separation between me and the external world has permanently dissolved. I understand reality works not the way I thought it worked until now. My ego has less power over me, and he is less afraid.

There are positive aspects but also negative aspects. One negative is that I have some realisations that run contrary to what spiritual people, even awakened one, think. And this is kind of isolating.

For example, I no longer believe the concept of soul has any sense. I know see this idea of a soul as a coping mechanism of the ego that seek soothing in the face of the idea of his own death.

The soul idea allows the ego to think the individuality will keep existing after the death of the body. It's comforting for him.

Whereas now I understand that what keeps existing is consciousness, that bear no individuality. At best, some memories will be transferred to the new body, but memories are no individuality. For all practical purposes, nothing of the old human will exist anymore.

There is no soul, only unpersonnal consciousness.

Why I can't believe anymore in pretty lies like everyone else?

Almost exactly a year ago the funny feeling at the base of my spine began, which started on the exact day my intuition indicated it would two months prior (weird shit like this has happened to me now and again for about the last decade so I wasn't completely oblivious to kundalini and related concepts before this happened). Over the last year it's gradually risen to the top of my head seemingly in conjunction with all of these drastic shifts I've had in my perspective (the fundamental to the experience of the self being the pure awareness underneath it all, thoughts are automatic and aren't "me" or really there is no "me", everyone perceives themselves as separate which leads them to seek connection through fleeting physical circumstances which inevitably end and cause suffering, all those kinds of non-duality jnana yoga type ideas becoming realizations rather than ideas I'd just intellectually analyzed). I've also had kriyas semi-often, especially when I can bring my awareness into my body to a relatively high degree, among other common KA symptoms like head pressure and random warmth around the body (I know there's at least some possibility it isn't KA but the symptoms do seem to line up pretty much exactly). The energy has been circulating up to the top of my head for several months now, which I thought would mean that it's about to happen, but obviously it's been several months.

I haven't been able to find any explanation anywhere of how this process "completes" (I'm talking about it coming out of your crown and having the non-dual realization or whatever) from the perspective of someone going through a gradual KA like I am. All the books, YouTube videos and blog posts I've been able to find were people who had spontaneous KAs and had no idea what they were getting into, so naturally that doesn't really help me. I'm under the impression that I need to reach some sort of state of perception through meditation (intuition led me into this situation so presumably it can lead me through the other side of it, and all it seems to ever tell me to do lately is meditate). But I'm also under the impression that it's impossible to be the cause that leads to the effect of having this all happen because cause and effect is duality, and also getting into observer perspective to a high enough degree to perceive yourself beyond the physical body and everything within the non-physical aspects of your perception is also still duality (because you're an observer with an observation). So this non-dual "state" everyone seems to mention as being an integral part of KA seems like an impossible thing to personally cause to happen.

There are three possibilities that I can think of. One is that some aspect of the totality of existence beyond my comprehension that exists beyond duality has to make it happen for me, for reasons that are beyond my ability to ascertain. The second is that I'm wrong and it is possible to just meditate the "right" way and it just happens. I have read about and talked to people who have said they've done this but they haven't been able to explain exactly what it was that made that meditation different to all their others, just that suddenly they became one with everything or whatever. The third is that like all the other realizations I've had over the past year that have shifted my perspective (like noticing that thoughts just come up by themselves and that I'm not choosing them led me to realize that I'm not my thoughts, for example, which helped me reach a different observer perspective towards them), there's something I need to notice and realize about something or everything within "my" awareness that will shift my perspective in some way and lead me out of perceived duality. None of the above possibilities present me with a path forward. Obviously there could be a fourth possibility I haven't considered, I have no idea. I know a lot of people make it happen with various types of energy work or breathing techniques (which I assume are against the rules to be specific about, although I didn't see a rule about it). I've put a decent amount of effort into trying a few of these and I've gotten nowhere with them (also intuition has led me to think maybe these aren't for me, although I could be wrong about that).

So am I just supposed to wait around and hope that it happens at some point, or is there actually something I can do about it? Surely someone here has gone through a gradual self-realization-based KA rather than a spontaneous one and was where I am now and can help me understand the path forward. Currently I don't feel like there is a path forward, like I'm just supposed to wait around for it to happen at some unknown point in the future for reasons completely beyond my comprehension.

I've posted this message on the spiritual awakening subreddit but got no response. I'm posting here with the hope of getting advices or something.

A little over a year ago, I seriously injured myself while playing my sport and I was overwhelmed by anxiety, fear and worry thinking that I only had one year left on my contract with my team... Calling my parents to tell them they told me "you're injured anyway, there's nothing you can do about it". There suddenly everything disappeared like when you flush the toilet and I was filled with a peace I had never known, followed by pure joy. I had the intuition that God had seen my pain and had taken it away from me. I use to meditate sometimes but I never felt some particular experiences during my sessions. What followed was a period of several months where I lived in alignment with myself, everything made sense. I knew exactly what to do, I had the “flow” and this inner strength guided me towards who I really was. I gave up several addictions and developed a lot of discipline where I couldn't before. But above all, I felt LOVE EVERYWHERE, especially at Church.

When I resumed training several months later, I began to feel a weight on my heart, everything was becoming grey and I was gradually losing my connection with this inner being as well as with God, I felt him more and more distant and love was less and less present. My mind knew before I did that I was back where I shouldn't have been. And the last thing I felt was “let go.” Things started to go out of control, I was not extended with my team and that triggered a resurgence of hitherto hidden traumas, for 4 months I have felt lost, no more goal, no more desire. I also feel like I don’t know myself, what I really like, who I am, what are my aspirations. I no longer feel anything in my heart. My parents are very worried. I also pray but with the impression that I do it in a void without faith. And I can't let go, it's eating away at me. I think about this awakening experience and the peace it gave me everyday. Is there something to do to reach this state again but in a more stable way ?

Since I stayed at my parents house for the 4 last months (start of the tough period) I had to get back to my "old self" habits maybe because I need to be the good son. I really don't want to break the process but I feel stuck at the moment.

And I feel very self centered now, something that I wasn't before. Or maybe not consciously.

If you need more details tell me, my story is a mess but I'm open to every advices or opinion.

Edit: thanks everyone for the replies and well wishes, I'm doing a bit better. I even slept some. I'll be giving my body lots of rest while I continue to learn and process all this

Original post:

I am in crisis mode, in desperate need of guidance through this. Please reach out if you are able to help.

The Kundalini energy in me has been utter chaos the last several days. I've slept two nights of the past eight. When I have been calm enough to sleep, as soon as I start to drift off my heart rate skyrockets and I get incredibly hot and exhausted (but unable to sleep).

I've mostly been lying in bed, trying what few grounding practices I can do (breathing, shaking, WLP). I'm trying to eat what I can but my stomach can't handle much. I can barely rest. In the few instances when it's died down, my body is incredibly weak and it's difficult to move. I have serious concern for my health given the severity of my condition; past adrenaline storms have made me worse. Exertion and stimulation beyond my baseline capacity with this illness leads to deterioration.

I've been taking beta blockers 2-3 times a day to calm my heart and nervous system. I have prescription benzodiazapenes I've taken a few times in the past week - they're the only thing that's given me a few hours of sleep. I wish I could drop them, but I worry forgoing all medication will make things worse.

I am praying throughout the day and night for mercy from the universe, God. I am trying to keep the fear at bay but it's difficult. I've been reckoning with my own mortality, wondering if I'll survive this. I really don't know how this will turn out. I can only type all this as I'm incredibly wired unable to soothe this aggressive activation.

If anyone can help me through this, offer advice, guidance, or support, please reach out. I will be eternally grateful to you. I don't have any spiritual teachers. There is much healing I am looking forward to but only if I can stabilize and protect my health to continue that journey.

Ave

When someone with an active kundalini pray, is it the same as using the energy to manifest something? Basically I am asking if there is a difference between a paying and manifesting.

Per the title, I'm experiencing an unexpected Kundalini awakening on top of a debilitating chronic health condition. I'm looking for thoughts, advice, guidance, resources, tips, etc., anything really.

Context: male in my 30s, I practiced yoga and meditation for several years before developing severe ME/CFS, an energy limiting chronic illness characterized by extreme fatigue, mitochondrial dysfunction, and nervous system dysregulation (to name a few). I am mostly bedbound and cannot walk or exercise; exertion makes my condition worse but I can currently handle gentle movement and some stretching. I am mostly confined to my bedroom.

I've been meditating more since becoming ill (2 years ago) and recently started practicing metta meditation, gentle breathwork, and chakra visualization. Notably, I have also been practicing SR (transmuting sexual energy), primarily to conserve my limited energy. I'm a relative novice with most of these practices.

6 days ago I did a short session of holotropic breathing, going very slow. Less than 15 minutes total. It felt good. Several hours later, however, I felt a growing tingling in my spine, eventually developing into a blissful glow flowing from my root to my crown. It's since grown more intense and I've been struggling to manage it. I'd heard of Kundalini awakening before this but never really considered it a goal or possibility for me.

At present, the intense activation of this awakening is overwhelming - grounding exercises help some but I'm easily tossed between ecstatic bliss and, more often, a chaotic restless state. Leaning into the pure bliss, as I've read is a path towards integration, has been too intense for me. The restlessness and insomnia is horrible, I haven't slept in three days. My main concern regarding my health is the toll this over-activation exacts on my body: I'm currently in a bad symptom flare and can feel the Kundalini sapping my energy, worsening my weakness and exhaustion. For the sake of my well-being, I would resolve or reverse this awakening if it were possible.

Priorities (urgent): I need to find ways to balance & process this Kundalini energy that limit the stress it places on my body: overstimulation, burning, restlessness, energy draining, insomnia, rapid heart rate, headache... In other words, I need to limit its activation to a safe minimum. I can feel how the days of activation and restlessness have worsened my already poor condition. (Writing this post, even, has overtaxed me).

Following this, on a spiritual level, I'm looking to learn more about the process of awakening and explore how best to integrate this divine energy. But my health has to come first.

I haven't had the energy or focus to read through this sub's wiki, apologies. The irony of receiving this powerful spiritual experience while living with an energy limiting condition is not lost on me. And yes, I realize I'm a fool for having attempted the preceding practices without knowing the risks.

I sincerely hope this awakening will guide both my physical and spiritual healing. Thanks in advance for your thoughts