[–] ▶ №12194113
[Last 50 Posts][1][2][3][4][5][6][7][8][9][Quote] [Voice Chat]>>12194123>>12194269>>12195675>>12217302>>12217305>>12526979
New thread because the old one is broken for some reason
<reddit space
In a last-ditch effort, you point out the chud's leakage, doing your best to remember your rhetorical tactics from Xitter.
>Hey um.. aren't you getting kind of mad?
<NO RETARD I'M NOT MAD I'M JUST MAKING FUN OF YOU FAGGOT
>I-If you're not mad, why are you still replying?
<BECAUSE IM MAKING YOU SEETHE AND ITS FUNNY KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK UR SO MAD RIGHT NOW
>But I-I'm not mad, I don't even wanna continue this conversation you're the one continuing it
<THEN WHY ARE YOU TALKING HUH WHY ARE YOU TALKING NIGGER
<WAIT
<YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO DISTRACT ME FROM SOYDUELING AREN'T YOU
<WELL IT WON'T WORK
<I'M NOT A RETARD LIKE YOU
Despite his words, a good 7 of the 10 minutes have already passed, during most of which the power of his soyduel was dampened by his leakage.
<YOU FUCKING CUCK NIGGER BASTARD!!! I'LL KILL YOU!! I'LL ACK YOU OBSESSED NIGGER!!
He pours all of his remaining strength into his attack for the remaining three minutes, but the damage has already been done.
You snap out of the stopped time and crumple to the truckbed, the orb clattering out of your hand. You are extremely disoriented, aching all over, barely able to stand - but not completely mindbroken.
You can hear the screams and gunshots of the ongoing gunfight. Low Life's car is swerving even more erratically, and seems as if it may crash any minute. The officer who attacked you in the Astral Plane has now diverted his attention solely to you, and is now raining all his bullets towards the truckbed you're in. What do you do?
▶ №12194123[Quote]
>>12194113 (OP)make chud troon out by forcing him to browse tranny subreddits and use him as a minion afterwards
▶ №12194126[Quote]>>12567723
shoot him back like in fortnite
▶ №12194146[Quote]>>12194205>>12567723
I scream "make love not war" at him so he stops being a heckin bigot and quits being an unwholesome woman hating incel or something
▶ №12194159[Quote]
why no IDs though?
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A sticcky
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no id's?
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>>12194146After shouting it at the top of your lab grown lungs, you start kissing each other
▶ №12194269[Quote]
>>12194113 (OP)suck the ball straight up into my loose rectum with a loud SCHLUUUURPing noise, then shit it out at the officer with cannon-like force, killing him and embedding the orb firmly inside his skull
▶ №12194435[Quote]
Drink soylent
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Wait for the officer to waste his bullets im trans btw
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>>12194113 (OP)Get off your arse & do something SLF
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nuthread and still no ids bruh or something
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go up also mods loop this thread please
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use ids doofus
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up
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>>12197936
Call him a nazi. That always works.
▶ №12199611[Quote]>>12567801
>>12197936
take someones jordans and throw them at chuds face
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>>12197936
blast his hands and let traffic handle the rest
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BVMQ o algo
▶ №12202774[Quote]>>12203650>>12567815
>>12197936
celebrate about killing the nazi bigot by posting on r/liberalgunowners
▶ №12203703[Quote]>>12204728
Why do I have to wait until after midnight for there to be good threads like this?
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>>12203703Good question, could just be coincidence because I've seen a couple save the bull updates in the morning.
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Oops discord found the thread! or something
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Wasted his life on shitting up le bait award
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>>12204860tsmt, grow up and start posting in /bnwo/ general
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>>12204860If you don't like why are you here coaling it up?
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>>122048604cord good morning
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>>12204860>bumping gemeralds that will save the shartywhich cord you from?
▶ №12212527[Quote]>>12213352
saging*
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>>12212527Likely one related to 4cuck
▶ №12213427[Quote]>>12215759
shoot at the tires of the fascist pigs car like your favourite disabled black trans jewish drag queen character from wolfenstein 15
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>>12213427this im trans btw
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Up
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up
▶ №12216827[Quote]>>12216901
>New thread because the old one is broken for some reason
><reddit space
>In a last-ditch effort, you point out the chud's leakage, doing your best to remember your rhetorical tactics from Xitter.
>>Hey um.. aren't you getting kind of mad?
><NO RETARD I'M NOT MAD I'M JUST MAKING FUN OF YOU FAGGOT
>>I-If you're not mad, why are you still replying?
><BECAUSE IM MAKING YOU SEETHE AND ITS FUNNY KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK UR SO MAD RIGHT NOW
>>But I-I'm not mad, I don't even wanna continue this conversation you're the one continuing it
><THEN WHY ARE YOU TALKING HUH WHY ARE YOU TALKING NIGGER
><WAIT
><YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO DISTRACT ME FROM SOYDUELING AREN'T YOU
><WELL IT WON'T WORK
><I'M NOT A RETARD LIKE YOU
>Despite his words, a good 7 of the 10 minutes have already passed, during most of which the power of his soyduel was dampened by his leakage.
><YOU FUCKING CUCK NIGGER BASTARD!!! I'LL KILL YOU!! I'LL ACK YOU OBSESSED NIGGER!!
>He pours all of his remaining strength into his attack for the remaining three minutes, but the damage has already been done.
>You snap out of the stopped time and crumple to the truckbed, the orb clattering out of your hand. You are extremely disoriented, aching all over, barely able to stand - but not completely mindbroken.
>You can hear the screams and gunshots of the ongoing gunfight. Low Life's car is swerving even more erratically, and seems as if it may crash any minute. The officer who attacked you in the Astral Plane has now diverted his attention solely to you, and is now raining all his bullets towards the truckbed you're in. What do you do?
▶ №12216841[Quote]
Sumo
▶ №12216901[Quote]
>>12216827ev&oe this already blows homoshit out of the water
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>>12194113 (OP)up im trans btw
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bvmp
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>>12217562
try and see if you can fire some pot shots at any tires to stop them pigs
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>>12217562
try to use the slinky and knife as sort of road spikes attached to the back of the car
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What happened after he saved the bull?
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up
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>>12217562
give him your vintage doc martens in solidarity, the heccin whities have taken so much from the wholesome BIPOCs of this community already
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Uo gp
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up
▶ №12224640[Quote]>>12225648>>12567936
>>12217562
go on r/askblackpeople and ask them how to calm lil doorknob down
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Go VP
▶ №12228174[Quote]>>12567945
>>12217562
be feraljak
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>>12217562
think "what would the OLD kanye do?"
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>>12217701
No idea, last time he said he had work, maybe he got really busy with that
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bumo or something
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Up
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Jl
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go up
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BVMQ
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Go up o algo
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up
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bvmo
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stay up for the next update
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up
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bvmp
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go up or whatever
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gem stay VP
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Bump
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Up for when the update arrives o algo
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BVMQ
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UP
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STAY UP
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the thread is looped
▶ №12273183[Quote]
bumping the looped thread
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Bumo
▶ №12278693[Quote]>>12278736
>>New thread because the old one is broken for some reason
>><reddit space
>>In a last-ditch effort, you point out the chud's leakage, doing your best to remember your rhetorical tactics from Xitter.
>>>Hey um.. aren't you getting kind of mad?
>><NO RETARD I'M NOT MAD I'M JUST MAKING FUN OF YOU FAGGOT
>>>I-If you're not mad, why are you still replying?
>><BECAUSE IM MAKING YOU SEETHE AND ITS FUNNY KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK UR SO MAD RIGHT NOW
>>>But I-I'm not mad, I don't even wanna continue this conversation you're the one continuing it
>><THEN WHY ARE YOU TALKING HUH WHY ARE YOU TALKING NIGGER
>><WAIT
>><YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO DISTRACT ME FROM SOYDUELING AREN'T YOU
>><WELL IT WON'T WORK
>><I'M NOT A RETARD LIKE YOU
>>Despite his words, a good 7 of the 10 minutes have already passed, during most of which the power of his soyduel was dampened by his leakage.
>><YOU FUCKING CUCK NIGGER BASTARD!!! I'LL KILL YOU!! I'LL ACK YOU OBSESSED NIGGER!!
>>He pours all of his remaining strength into his attack for the remaining three minutes, but the damage has already been done.
>>You snap out of the stopped time and crumple to the truckbed, the orb clattering out of your hand. You are extremely disoriented, aching all over, barely able to stand - but not completely mindbroken.
>>You can hear the screams and gunshots of the ongoing gunfight. Low Life's car is swerving even more erratically, and seems as if it may crash any minute. The officer who attacked you in the Astral Plane has now diverted his attention solely to you, and is now raining all his bullets towards the truckbed you're in. What do you do?
▶ №12278736[Quote]>>12281604
>>12278693are those your soysonas or something
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>>12278736Nope xe just jakked homoraisin
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An up for ze looped thread o algo
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with how long the new update is taking either OP's life has a lot or this is gonna be a big one
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Bumperald
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I DON'T CARE LITERALLY COULD NO CARE LESS YOU STUPID RETARDED NIGGER FROM LESOTHO
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bumo
▶ №12308136[Quote]
NEED NEW UPDATE NOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWW
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another gemmy adventure thread lost to the 'chives…
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>>12311036
Godspeed op im already invested in le heckin loreionooossssss and learning more about the soy dueling and impish
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Go up looped gem
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bumo
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up
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go bvmq for the looped thread
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VPERQLD
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LQQP BQCK VP
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Loop
▶ №12335703[Quote]
LQQP
▶ №12338042[Quote]
loop nuke
▶ №12341990[Quote]
Loop up
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Looped bumorald
▶ №12351496[Quote]
>New thread because the old one is broken for some reason
><reddit space
>In a last-ditch effort, you point out the chud's leakage, doing your best to remember your rhetorical tactics from Xitter.
>>Hey um.. aren't you getting kind of mad?
><NO RETARD I'M NOT MAD I'M JUST MAKING FUN OF YOU FAGGOT
>>I-If you're not mad, why are you still replying?
><BECAUSE IM MAKING YOU SEETHE AND ITS FUNNY KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK UR SO MAD RIGHT NOW
>>But I-I'm not mad, I don't even wanna continue this conversation you're the one continuing it
><THEN WHY ARE YOU TALKING HUH WHY ARE YOU TALKING NIGGER
><WAIT
><YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO DISTRACT ME FROM SOYDUELING AREN'T YOU
><WELL IT WON'T WORK
><I'M NOT A RETARD LIKE YOU
>Despite his words, a good 7 of the 10 minutes have already passed, during most of which the power of his soyduel was dampened by his leakage.
><YOU FUCKING CUCK NIGGER BASTARD!!! I'LL KILL YOU!! I'LL ACK YOU OBSESSED NIGGER!!
>He pours all of his remaining strength into his attack for the remaining three minutes, but the damage has already been done.
>You snap out of the stopped time and crumple to the truckbed, the orb clattering out of your hand. You are extremely disoriented, aching all over, barely able to stand - but not completely mindbroken.
>You can hear the screams and gunshots of the ongoing gunfight. Low Life's car is swerving even more erratically, and seems as if it may crash any minute. The officer who attacked you in the Astral Plane has now diverted his attention solely to you, and is now raining all his bullets towards the truckbed you're in. What do you do?
▶ №12353833[Quote]
Looping bump
▶ №12356312[Quote]
LQQP
▶ №12359046[Quote]
dptie
▶ №12362221[Quote]
Looperald
▶ №12367804[Quote]
loop
▶ №12379541[Quote]
Bvmp
▶ №12393472[Quote]>>12395407
This coming 11pm,all soyjak.party accounts wiIl be CUT. This is according from the creator of soyjak.party. All the activities that was being done this time will be delay, SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE. To save you're soyjak.party accounts, please forward this message to 5 threads for us to make sure that you are active user of soyjak.party. If you can't pass this post to 5 threads you're acount will be cut without hesitancy.
▶ №12396890[Quote]
go VP
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Looping the gem for when the update comes
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>>12398993
trips
▶ №12399000[Quote]
fuck.
▶ №12399010[Quote]
>>12398993
gemmy, when it's done i'm gonna burn it onto a DVD and leave it at walmart that would be funny I think
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>>12398993
Cool, hopefully the songs he makes are great
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>>12398993
Gem, if possible have them play on certain pages on the website
>Just like my MSPFAIRINOOOOOOOOOSSSSS!!!!!
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>>12398993
If possible I think the theme(s) for tyrone's crew should take some cues from jet set radio
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GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEG nusois can't adventurethread
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Up
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Loopo
▶ №12413217[Quote]
Bump
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>>12414592
Start jerking off in front of him because of your porn addiction
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>>12414587
Marge? this adventure finished?
i think he already died due say n-word said reddit
▶ №12414649[Quote]>>12567973
>>12414592
Ask the businessman for some money so you can "get a job" or whatever that means
▶ №12414711[Quote]>>12414726
>>12414664
Oh i understand but why did you change another topic Feraljak adventure?
it's not over yet Soyjak character when it ends adventure, next adventure Feraljak
▶ №12414726[Quote]>>12414749
>>12414711Trvst the plqn nusoi
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>>12414726Oh great called me nusoi, don't let me confuse double adventure at the same time thread
▶ №12414815[Quote]>>12419688
>>12414592
Order a bug pizza in case Soyjak's lazy ass shows up
▶ №12419688[Quote]>>12419697
>>12414815get some nachos from the gas station and call soyak again
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>>12419688wrong person award
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BVMQ
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Up
▶ №12429773[Quote]>>12659845
>>12414587
Consult impish immediately
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Last thread was a gemerald so I will up for more content
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Bumo
▶ №12432337[Quote]
Up to agartha
▶ №12434771[Quote]
VP
▶ №12436819[Quote]
Upping to the frigid peaks of agartha
▶ №12437067[Quote]
>>12437019wtf is a “farty” what are these fucking websites i wanna know
▶ №12437219[Quote]>>12568015
>>12437197
Then you scream at him saying you want a job
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Sorry for the sage
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>>12437197
shoot him in the head
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Bvmp
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>>12414592
lmao just swapped to feraljak
next time you switch back to soyak do the GTA V character swap zoom out thing
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>>12437197
have feraljak get progressively more schizophrenic as these panels go on until he takes his medication and resets it
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>>12437197
Get those handouts from that elitist asshole by force
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GQ VP
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Bumo
▶ №12454703[Quote]>>12455803
OP where are you…
▶ №12455799[Quote]
is there a website?
▶ №12455803[Quote]
>>12454703Hunky twink sex machine thread
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>>12455813
why did you betray us for a shitty thread which even OP didn't care for
▶ №12455866[Quote]>>12457472
Better not accept the gempass for this
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>>12455849
I guess that's fair enough
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>>12455866What is /gem/ even like?
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Up
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Bump
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>>12461333
NU TOSS
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>>12461333
dude this adventure thread rocks have you made any other oc
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>>12461335
Do it calmly and ignore, find another job
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>>12461335
Force him to pay up…. or else
▶ №12461787[Quote]>>12568028
>>12461335
Ask Cobbert for help reasoning with this man
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Up
▶ №12466036[Quote]>>12469727
>>12461335
burn it down because it's a swasticar
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uperald
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Bumorald
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>>12461335
skin him with your teef
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>>12485596
Turn that chudcel's cybertruck into scrap
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IAS go down
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>>12485596
Pickpocket all of the businessman's clothes like in Skyrim
▶ №12489685[Quote]
indians:
>pagan ethnoreligion (literally what every white supremacist pagan wants)
>societal racism that filters undesirables (caste system) (eugenics)
>ethnostate that survived despite conquerors
>traditional culture that has lasted for thousands of years
>rejection of modern society (living in dirt huts which is BASED)
>literally the descendants of the Aryan race
why are they still hated?
>le shitskinned
>le indians are bad
not valid excuses when most pagans and white supremacists call for these exact tenants.
>They literally worship cow shit and urine my dude
You focus exclusively on low castes in poor retard neighbourhoods. I can go to some appalachia trailerpark and take some photos of your "aryan" kids in prostitute gear and of sisterfuckers and say that you are all like that. Same logic.
>my brother they are the very definiton of undesirable low IQ uncultured and uneducated swine
If we were like that we wouldn't be colonising your country. Most people who work in your different sectors are indians, some of lower castes work in tech support, others are doctors and some lead your companies. This is not DEI. Your industries see a real value in indians. I bet you saw that article of indians owning most of London too now?
>I wouldn't say it survived, more so that it's a cancer on the earth. Just look at it.
Indian culture is the most resilient. There have been bad times, but we lead our society for most of it we kept our culture and religion. Germans now worship a middle-eastern god coming from their old historical enemy (Rome)
>Yeah a culture of scamming, having no morals, having an extreme lack of hygiene to a comical level and being small, stinky, having a small penis and being skinny-fat and brown.
We gave you arithmetics, we gave you chess, we told you guys teh secret of sugar cultivation. The first society to have banks was the Maurya Empire.
>They reject everything good about modern society as well
Is everything good meaning to be a slave to a wage system, to be racist and to be self-indulging to a point where you forget about family values. You put your kids in the streets and you forget your parents in nursing home because you're scared they'll shame your image. Rejection of these things is a good thing.
POST THIS IN 5 DIFFERENT THREADS FOR GOOD LUCK o algo and oreos
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>>12485596
I pull out my ukulele with Cobbert to win the man over through the power of music
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>>12490391
Shout "FREE PALESTINE!"
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>>12490391
Pounce at the businessman to also burn him
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>>12490391
you run into the store in the gas station and use their fire extinguisher
▶ №12490882[Quote]>>12502228
>>12490391
Scream FREE PALESTINE FREE PALESTINEEE!!! as you become an DNB.
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>>12490391
Stop, Drop and Roll to spite that Nazi
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up
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Up
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BVMQ
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does anyone have the enter the astral plane mp4 and the rest of the story 'chived? i checked the 'ki but it didn't have proper 'chives of them unfortunately
▶ №12502104[Quote]>>12502115
Adventure coal goes down
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>>12502090
thankies
+100 faith in humanity restored
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Uperald
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Bump
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Bumo
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Go VP
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Up to agartha
▶ №12526703[Quote]>>12571479
>>12525451
Strangle him to death
▶ №12526974[Quote]>>12571479
>>12525451
STAB HIM IN THE THROAT
▶ №12526979[Quote]>>12527650
>>12194113 (OP)Rot in hell samefag kike, you literally post 'p and tranime.
ni
▶ №12527650[Quote]
>>12526979Take your medicine NOW!!!
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Up
▶ №12528945[Quote]>>12594496
>>12525451
Ask cobson for help, he seems like a pretty chill dude!
▶ №12528961[Quote]>>12532604
>>12525451
OP they moved your HTSM adventure thread back to /soy/ you can start posting on it again
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>>12525451
notice it's a freedom phone and snap it in half
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>>12532047
Meds
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>>12525451
grab the fire extinguisher and beat him to death with it
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up
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Up
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>>12548991
Yeah that's weird
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>>12551604oh my science and vaccines they're heckin' lost mediaerinoerinos now
▶ №12551966[Quote]
JANNNIESSS!!!!! GIVE US BACK OUR GEMS!!!
▶ №12552038[Quote]>>12552074
>jannies go after the only good thread on this shitty board
fuck this shit site I hope every baittranny and every cordtroon acks
▶ №12552122[Quote]
We need answers Jannies!!!!!!!
▶ №12552527[Quote]
Up for our gem to be returned
▶ №12552676[Quote]>>12552715>>12552755
WHY IS NOBODY TALKING ABOUT THIS WTF WTF WTF
▶ №12552766[Quote]>>12552786
>>12552755scroll up lil bro
▶ №12552786[Quote]>>12552789
>>12552766yeah bro thats alot of history lost. I think they banned OP and deleted all xer posts, how could you tell?
▶ №12552808[Quote]
>>12552789yeah rip nate in antartica it was funny
▶ №12552831[Quote]>>12552845
>>12552789there's still some posts on /chive/
▶ №12552845[Quote]
>>12552831Yeah part one is there but part 2 is gone because the jannies are slfs and banned op
▶ №12552956[Quote]>>12553113
good no gems allowed in this board
▶ №12553101[Quote]
>>12553087
do you think I would fucking know?
▶ №12553113[Quote]
>>12552956Not I make the rules tell Limeade to kill himself
▶ №12553998[Quote]
Bumo
▶ №12554215[Quote]
Free op he dindu nuffin
▶ №12554351[Quote]
Up
▶ №12554442[Quote]
Bumq
▶ №12554645[Quote]
Go up and hope op comes back
▶ №12555331[Quote]
Go up to spite limeade and bring op back
▶ №12556745[Quote]
Stay up
▶ №12557391[Quote]>>12557735
wahoo thread is back
▶ №12557735[Quote]
>>12557391It aint truly back until op is unbanned and the thread restored to how it was pre-ban
▶ №12558261[Quote]
Staying up for OP's return
▶ №12558934[Quote]
Up up up, hope OP retvrns soon
▶ №12560070[Quote]
TJD
▶ №12560907[Quote]
why is this thread still looped
▶ №12562392[Quote]
>>12560088Faggot mods banned xim
▶ №12564560[Quote]
Upping the gem for when OP returns
▶ №12565595[Quote]
Up and also limeaids is a faggot and should step down
▶ №12567039[Quote]
Up for op to return and limeade to step down
▶ №12567110[Quote]
Bump and down with limeaids
▶ №12567533[Quote]>>12567548
>>12567332who was the janoid
▶ №12567537[Quote]
>>12567332Also this isn't me idk why soysneed referred to the Save the Bull 'teen as "you" but i asked soysneed and got him unbanned
▶ №12567548[Quote]
>>12567533Unsure, maybe try asking him or something
▶ №12567562[Quote]>>12567589
>>12567516why did you get banned xister?
▶ №12567589[Quote]>>12567619>>12567633
>>12567562I posted a HTSM soyquote and it made the janny leak so much that xe gave me a 3 day ban even though I didn't break the rules
I appealed it but xe ignored the appeal for 2 days
▶ №12567633[Quote]>>12567667
>>12567589Do you have your HTSM adventure thread saved?, how could you tell?
▶ №12567667[Quote]
>>12567633Yeah I have it saved in HTML, but it's also still on /chive/ (although you can only view it through the index, not the catty, since it was moved to /soy/ and then deleted for some reason)
▶ №12567723[Quote]>>12567829
>>12194126>>12194146Shakily rising to your feet and pulling yourself up, you position yourself at the gun and attempt to resume fire.
However, your frayed nerves make shooting even more difficult, not to mention you can only barely peek your head out for fear of it getting obliterated. As can be expected, you completely miss every shot.
In desperation, you scream out to him for understanding, to stop this senseless fighting, just like Steven Universe.
>MAKE LOVE, NOT WAR!!He pauses for a moment, his facial expression unreadable under the helmet. Then, he resumes fire with a manic fervor, flailing wildly.
<DID YOU JUST TELL ME TO HAVE SEX??? YOU FUCKING SIMP CUCK!! DON'T YOU KNOW HOW FUCKING HARD IT IS FOR MEN LIKE ME TO HAVE SEX??<OF COURSE YOU FUCKING DON'T. YOU JUST FUCKING GATEKEEP SOCIETY AND HOLD PUSSY OVER OUR HEADS.<WELL FUCK YOU. I DON'T EVEN CARE ABOUT GETTING PUSSY. KYS KYS KYS NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIIIIGGGGEEERRR!!!! ▶ №12567766[Quote]>>12567790
>>12567727Pray to science with all your might to calm down
▶ №12567790[Quote]>>12567814
>>12567766Don't suggest stuff right now, I'm reuploading all the old panels that got deleted. It'll take a little while
▶ №12567801[Quote]
>>12199611You gather all your courage.
You hope that the black KANGs will forgive you for what you're about to do.
With a burst of strength you didn't know you had, you pry off Lil Doorknob's shoe.
<HEY NIGGA WHAT THE FUCK MANE THOSE MY NEW YEEZYS<I'LL FUCKIN SMOKE YOU NIGGA WHAT THE FUCK GIVE DEM BACKDespite his struggle and confused protests, you manage to wrench it up, holding it high above your head.
<…<Don't do it mane.Imagining you're John Wick, you throw the shoe with all your power.
It lands squarely on the head of the officer.
He's caught completely off guard, and barely has time to breathe before his helmet meets the pavement in a sickening CRUNCH.
His body bounces off the road like a ragdoll, flying through the air, and then embeds itself into Low Life's windshield.
You think he might be dead.
Low Life seems more annoyed than anything by the new car decoration.
▶ №12567814[Quote]>>12567824
>>12567790Are you still working on your "site"? This is pvre fucking kino.
▶ №12567815[Quote]
>>12202774Lil Doorknob has begun cursing you out in just about every way imaginable, gesticulating with wild threatening motions. His alpha BVLL presence makes you cower submissively.
To distract yourself, you open up r/LiberalGunOwners to hopefully farm updoots by sharing your epic victory against the fascists.
Thoughever, to your dismay, you find that the subreddit is no longer for liberals such as yourself, but for those who consider themselves 'classical liberals'. The very thought makes your gut churn. These fucking chuds have invaded every safe space you had.
You decide to post anyway, of only out of spite. You'll show them what a REAL liberal gun owner looks like. You make a post with a photo of the cop's mangled form, making sure not to say any policephobic phrases which could lead to automatic post deletion. As a cherry on top, you add a single smiling emoji to the body of the post. That'll really set them off, you smirk.
To your shock, howeverbeit, the bulk of the replies are… completely supportive. It seems like these bigots hate the pigs just as much as you do.
You feel a confusing mix of emotions surge through you. Shock, confusion, disappointment, curiosity … appreciation? No, of course not. These are still disgusting fascists, even if they do hate cops a little.
The heckin' pigs are still following behind you, but the death of their SWAT team member has made them cautious, and they're following at a greater distance.
What do you do?
▶ №12567824[Quote]>>12567838
>>12567814Yeah I'm still working on the website. As said before, it's going up on October 30th
▶ №12567829[Quote]
>>12567723LENNONJAK LIVES GELELE
▶ №12567838[Quote]>>12567862
>>12567824Heckin hyped or whatever it is. Anyways how long are you planning to keep this running? This is almost like those comic strips i used to follow in the newspaper as a kid.
▶ №12567862[Quote]>>12567901>>12633391
>>12567838A long time, I'm planning to run this for years. I've already got a big overarching story and heckin' worldbuilding planned out
▶ №12567936[Quote]
>>12224640With Lil Doorknob's verbal assault becoming increasingly upsetting, you desperately run to the only place you know could help: r/AskBlackPeople.
You type a heartfelt, gut-wrenching, soul-rending, tear-evoking plea, and are immediately met with an overwhelming number of replies.
They're all telling you to… say the… N word?
You can scarcely believe it. Aren't white people not supposed to say the dreaded n-word? It's like He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named!
But if so many African Americans are telling you to…
You go into DMs with the top comment to hopefully get some clarification.
>Not trying to contradict you, but are you sure? I should say the n-word to him?<yea nigga yknow it's like, you friends and shit. so you basically niggas.<so like you saying nigga to him is like, a sign of respect. that you really fw him heavy u kno>I didn't know that! Thanks a bunch, RustedPipe!<anytime nigga ▶ №12567945[Quote]
>>12228174You are Feraljak.
Presently, you're chilling with your buddy Cobbert on the side of the road, vaping and shooting the shit.
You like Cobbert. He's a cool guy. He has a lot of fascinating things to say about airplane mechanics and naval history, which you're sure you would find very interesting if you paid attention long enough to comprehend it.
Still, though, you can't help but feel you'd be having a lot more fun right now if your best friend Soyak were here. He hasn't picked up any of your calls since this morning. What the fucking fuck is that bastard doing? Probably watching his bull fuck his wife again. Without you. You simmer with indignation. Why doesn't he ever invite you to watch? You know it's his wife and all, but isn't sharing what cuckoldry is all about?
Shaking your head, you look around. You're really, really bored. You decide you should do something fun with Cobbert to distract yourself from what a total asshat Soyak is being right now.
To your left is a coffee shop, The Doe Dough Though Coffee Shop & Bakery. You haven't been there, but Cobbert assures you it's really good.
To your right is a gas station, Cobson's Shell. You and Cobbert hang around there a lot. Their nachos aren't too bad, but the clerk there weirds you out. You make a point never to go there at night.
You've also noticed that there's a primly dressed man in the gas station parking lot, and he's eyeing you disdainfully. Fuck him. You hate stuck-up white pricks like him. You hope one day some black kings teach him a lesson. Fucker.
What do you do?
▶ №12567962[Quote]
Op here I just wanted to say that I love black men
▶ №12567973[Quote]
>>12414649You ask the businessman for some money so you can "get a job", or whatever that means.
<What? Absolutely not. If you want a job, go up to the manager of that shop over there, shake his hand, and firmly ask for one. You don't need my handouts.This was not your ideal answer. Does this fucking boomer seriously believe you can just pull yourself up by your bootstraps? Newsflash, gramps, the world doesn't work that way anymore! In fact, it never did! Society would never let someone like you succeed, that's why you have to smoke weed, jack off and shoplift to make this shit world bearable!
Not like he would ever get that, though. He probably has a "happy" life, all repressed and boring with his "wife" and "family" and "job". Secretly, deep down, he wishes he could be you. He WISHES.
What do you do?
▶ №12568015[Quote]
>>12437219You snap and scream at him.
>I WANT A JOB!!! AND I CAN'T FUCKING GET ONE IF YOU DON'T GIVE ME A LITTLE TO GET OFF MY FUCKING FEET!!! I JUST NEED SOME MONEY SO I CAN GET TO A BETTER MENTAL PLACE, TREAT MYSELF A LITTLE BIT AND THEN I'LL FEEL BETTER ENOUGH TO GET A FUCKING JOB, 'CUZ RIGHT NOW I'M TOO FUCKING DEPRESSED TO DO ANYTHING, OKAY??? SO JUST GIVE ME THE FUCKING MONEY ALREADY!!!Your head is pounding. You want to fucking gut this Nazi right here on the fucking street for everyone to fucking see. But you need to stay cool, 'cuz Cobbert's here. Gotta stay cool in front of Cobbert. If Cobbert weren't here you'd paint the fucking walls with his brains though. You fucking would.
Remembering your breathing exercises from your therapy, you calm yourself.
>Okay, okay, look. I'll do some work for you, okay? Then you can fucking pay me. I'll wash your car, how about that? Okay?You fish your handkerchief out of your coat pocket. Was it always this shade of brown? You remember it being white at some point. Whatever.
Before he can respond, you rush off to his car and begin maniacally rubbing the windshield with the rag. Cobbert tags along, leaning against a metal beam.
▶ №12568028[Quote]
>>12461787You enlist Cobbert's aid.
>COBBERT… IF YOU DON'T HELP ME OUT HERE.. I MIGHT DO SOMETHING I FUCKIN' REGRET…Cobbert quickly steps up, with a politeness that seems out of place in this situation.
<Hey, look, alright. How about we compromise? You pay us 20 dollars for the service. Everyone walks away happy.The businessman remains unconvinced.
<A compromise? I DIDN'T ASK YOU FOR YOUR "SERVICES"! In fact, I would rather you had not given them! This is a pathetic scheme and you thugs should feel ashamed of yourselves. Now, I'm going to be off, and if you so much as touch my car again I'm calling the police. You should feel lucky I'm not calling them now for smearing my truck with your filth.He turns and begins walking towards the gas station entrance.
It appears this man is severely misguided.
What do you do?
▶ №12568052[Quote]
You lunge at the man as he goes, claws outstretched.
>I'LL FUCKIN' KILL YOU YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!! I'LL RIP YOUR FFFUUCKING SKIN OFF WITH MY TEETH!!! I'LL REND YOU LIMB FROM LIMB!!! I'LL MAKE YOU WISH YOUR MOTHER FUCKING ABORTED YOU, NAZI MOTHERFUCKER!!!
Cobbert swoops in, holding you back.
<Chill man, chill. Chill.
>IT'S NOT CHILL, MAN. THIS FUCKER JUST FUCKING CALLED US THUGS AND FILTH. I AIN'T GONNA LET THAT SLIDE. NO WAY MAN. NO WAY.
<Look, how about we-
>NO. NO!!! I'M GOING TO FUCK UP THIS FUCKING FUCK'S ELON NAZI SHITMOBILE RIGHT FUCKING NOW, AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME!!!
You wrench yourself from Cobbert's clutches, clamber onto the truck's roof and begin jumping up and down on the windshield with all your might. To your dismay, it doesn't so much as crack.
>FFFUUUUCCCKING NAZI GLASS!!! YOU KNOW WHAT?? I'M GOING TO BURN THIS FUCKER TO THE GROUND!!!
It occurs to you that you're not exactly sure how to burn a car. You feel around in your pocket for your matchbook.
Holding it, you stand for a moment before a realization hits you. Oh yeah. The gas. You remember them pouring gasoline to set shit on fire in your favorite Tarantino movies.
You set to work on covering the car with gasoline. Once finished, you light a match, and, without further ado, flick it into the large puddle.
The car does indeed start burning.
However, in your rage, it did not occur to you that you were standing in said puddle.
You are now on fire.
What do you do?
▶ №12568124[Quote]>>12568145>>12568178>>12569151
Although being aflame comes as some shock to you, the sheer amount of adrenaline in your system numbs the pain. Instead of being scared, or fleeing, a different idea takes form in the haze of your enraged mind.
You're going to make a statement. For the whole world to hear.
>FREE PALESTINE! FREE PALESTIIIINE!!!! FREE PALESTIIIINE!!!!
You pound your fists in the air. You're not going to let the world ignore the suffering of the Palestinian people ANY LONGER. You need change NOW NOW NOW!
Cobbert views your display with absolute horror.
<HEY!!! HEY, STOP IT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?
He swiftly runs towards you, grabs you and drags you into the gas station.
Once inside, he grabs a fire extinguisher from the wall and douses you with foam as you continue screaming and flailing wildly.
Once you are finally extinguished, you calm a bit and unsteadily rise to your feet. You aren't that injured aside from minor burns, although your socks are burnt to a crisp and your feet hurt like hell.
<Are you okay, dude? Seriously, what was that? You could've died!
Cobbert dusts you off, examining your face with a concerned expression.
You look to the side and pretend to ignore him.
The clerk, Cobson, speaks up from the register.
<You alright?
>Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
You mutter. He seemed oddly calm, but you guess he saw you weren't in danger anymore.
However, you are both interrupted by the sound of a voice calling out nearby.
<Hey!
It's the businessman, with a wicked smile on his face. He draws closer.
<Oh, you bastards are in deep now.
He pulls out his phone.
<I'm going to call the police, and you're going to prison. And believe me, there'll be more than enough evidence on the CCTV out there to convict both of you pieces of human excrement.
<And you'd better prepare to get sued too. Kiss your drug money goodbye. No more hookers for you cretins!
Hookers? Is this old fart serious? For his information, you use sex bots, which are a whole lot more ethical! You still pay the real women they're modeled after on their OnlyDroids though. You're a decent human being, unlike those chuds who pirate them.
Still, if you don't act soon, you have no doubt he'll make good on his word.
What do you do?
▶ №12568136[Quote]
Alright, all the old panels are reuploaded and we're caught up to where the comic was before, so you can start suggesting things again. I'll be uploading the new panel shortly, I'm almost done with it
▶ №12568178[Quote]
>>12568124kick him like the beast you are
▶ №12569139[Quote]
>>12567516VVE VRE SQ BVCK
▶ №12569151[Quote]
>>12568124Strangle him to death before he can call anyone and stuff him into any mascot costumes like heckin' William Afton
▶ №12569510[Quote]
GQ VP
▶ №12571479[Quote]>>12572887>>12572916>>12572940>>12575754
>>12525497>>12526703>>12526974>>12542466The voices in your head scream at you.
>TEAR HIM APART>STRANGLE HIM>STAB HIM IN THE THROAT>CRUSH HIS BONES>GNAW HIS FLESH>MAKE HIM BLEEDYou are more than happy to oblige them.
Quicker than anyone can react, you pounce on the man like a rabid dog.
You are upon him in an instant, lashing and scrabbling at his flesh with your nails, biting and gnashing your teeth.
>YOU STUCK UP FUCKING NAZI FUCKER!!! I FUCKING HATE YOU!! I FUCKING HATE YOU!!! LEARN TO LOVE YOU PIECE OF SHIT!!The man struggles, raising his arms in an attempt to defend himself from your relentless assault. Tears come to his eyes.
<Wait, wait, stop, no! No! HELP! HELP! HE'S CRAZY!!You can faintly feel Cobbert trying to pull you off of him, but his efforts are futile. You've latched on like a pitbull, and you won't let go until this fascist pig is fucking dead.
What do you do?
▶ №12572887[Quote]>>12594496
>>12571479go for the throat and oreos
▶ №12572940[Quote]
>>12571479Throw him in to the snack aisle
▶ №12573641[Quote]
VP
▶ №12574809[Quote]
bumo
▶ №12575319[Quote]
bumorald
▶ №12575754[Quote]
>>12571479why is Cobson, Hornyson?
▶ №12581923[Quote]
Go up
▶ №12583907[Quote]
Bumorald
▶ №12586731[Quote]
'Up
▶ №12587049[Quote]
'ump
▶ №12589733[Quote]
bumo
▶ №12590704[Quote]
Up
▶ №12592285[Quote]>>12592331
upupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupvupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupupup
▶ №12594496[Quote]>>12594803>>12594833>>12601489
>>12572887>>12528945Eager to end this Nazi insect's worthless life already, you lunge for his throat, wrapping your hand around his neck. You find that it is actually pretty difficult to strangle somebody, and so you employ your other hand as well.
You squeeze with all your might. He chokes and sputters, clawing at your hands as they crush his windpipe.
But before you have the satisfaction of watching the light drain from his bigoted eyes, you are suddenly yanked up off him into the air.
<That's enough of that!Cobson has lifted you by the hood of your jacket, much like a cat would take its kitten by the scruff. The businessman, now freed, skitters back anxiously.
<This is my shop, so you'd better behave yourselves.He turns to the man.
<You should probably leave, safer that way. Don't worry, I'll call the police. Can I get your number so I can follow up?The man nods hurriedly.
<Yes, yes! It's 305-208-9046. Thank you.Shaken, he rises to his feet and flees the building. You can hear his truck's engine start up outside.
Once the sound of his car fades into the distance, the three of you stand aimlessly. Cobson is back at the counter, but he has made no move to call the police. Instead, he is smiling amicably, as if nothing out of the ordinary has happened.
Cobbert pipes up.
<Are we good?<Yeah, you're good.<Thanks!Cobbert turns to you with a grin.
See? I told you he was cool!As much as you'd like to believe that, something about Cobson unnerves you. You can't shake the feeling that you've left the frying pan and entered the fire.
Also, you're still pissed you didn't get to kill that asshole.
What do you do?
▶ №12594803[Quote]>>12594939>>12601717
>>12594496Ask cobson why he didn't call the cops
▶ №12594833[Quote]>>12601727
>>12594496sneak a peek into cobsons backroom behind the counter to see if there is anything your heckin spiritual but not religious 6th sense was warning you about
▶ №12600850[Quote]
Up
▶ №12601489[Quote]
>>12594496Just leave and go to the bakery for a quick bite
▶ №12601717[Quote]
>>12594803You ask Cobson why he didn't call the cops. He lets out a low chortle.
<You guys are chill, so it's fine! Besides, people like him could bear to be roughed around a little sometimes.Cobbert smiles wider.
<Yeah, I'm sure he didn't mind too much. Not with all his money to cheer him up.He looks at you expectantly.
You force a laugh.
>For sure. Bastard's probably already forgotten.You're still wary of Cobson, as admittedly chill as he seems. He and Cobbert always get along well though. You suppose it's expected, considering they're cousins. Not that he knows him any better because of that - Cobson moved here from Croatia a few years ago, so he's as much a stranger to Cobbert as he is to you.
▶ №12601727[Quote]>>12602513>>12603668
>>12594833You cock your head to peek into the backroom to see if there's anything your spiritual, but not religious, 6th sense warned you about.
Pinned on the wall of the passageway are some ballpoint pen drawings of an anime character. They vary in style and quality, but all seem like they were done in a hurry. Also, this is just your artist's sense talking, for you are a sensitive soul after all, but they seem rather soulless to you. Like heckin' uncanny AI art.
What do you do?
▶ №12602253[Quote]
gems
▶ №12602257[Quote]
wait there's more?
▶ №12602374[Quote]
you ask cobson if he can give you and cobbert a job
▶ №12602513[Quote]>>12602576>>12603462>>12604902
>>12601727Attempt to draw one yourself and put it on the wall as an offering of thanks for your safety
▶ №12602957[Quote]
Ho up
▶ №12603462[Quote]
>>12602513better yet you draw your bisexual non practicing jewish orc dungeons and dragon campaign character and sign it off with your name
▶ №12603668[Quote]
>>12601727tear it down and paste some REAL art
▶ №12604683[Quote]
Bumo
▶ №12604902[Quote]>>12604921
>>12602513Figuring you should in any case court his favor, and that the wall is in desperate need of some REAL art, you grab a pen from his desk and begin scribbling down your own masterful take on the character.
VOILA.
It's beautiful. Avante-garde. Genre-redefining. Anti-bourgeoisie. the epitome of everything art SHOULD be. No robot could ever create this.
Beaming with pride, you sign it with a flourish and stride over to the wall, ready to put it in the center. Its rightful place.
However, Cobson's arm shoots out to stop you.
<Oh, sorry, that's for employees' art only.For a moment, you think you see a flicker of anger on his face, but it is instantly replaced by the same even-tempered smile.
<I'll gladly keep it though. I appreciate it.He takes the picture from your hands and places it in a drawer under his desk. As he does so, you notice that he has what appears to be some kind of odd lump protruding from his rear. You feel it best not to question this.
What do you do?
▶ №12604921[Quote]>>12605377
>>12604902you instanly bite the lump because you're hungry
▶ №12605377[Quote]>>12605519>>12605561>>12606029
>>12604921The voices in your head rise in volume once again.
!!BITE THE LUMP, BITE IT NOW!!
>Why though?!!BECAUSE I'M HUNGRY!!
>Shit, good a reason as any.In a flash, your teeth are firmly lodged in the mound.
It is the most foul, rancid, nauseating combination of stale diahhroea and God-knows-what mold you have ever had the displeasure of smelling.
You immediately stagger back and vomit repeatedly.
<Uh… you alright?Cobbert says, somewhat perturbed, not coming closer for fear of entering the blast radius.
Cobson seems unfazed, smiling professionally as ever.
<Let's keep the horseplay to a minimum, okay?What do you do?
▶ №12605519[Quote]>>12606097
>>12605377Take your meds to make the demons in your head go away
▶ №12605561[Quote]>>12606117
>>12605377You ask for a soylent
▶ №12606097[Quote]
>>12605519Suddenly, you remember that you were supposed to take your meds 3 hours ago. You produce the bottle of Dr. Soystein's prescription from your jacket pocket and pop one of the pills in your mouth.
Immediately, the whole world seems blissfully serene. It's like you're transported to a sunny beach on a cool spring day, all your anger and anxiety swept away with the tide.
A smile creeps across your face, and you wipe your mouth, turning to Cobbert. He views you with relief.
<Oh yeah, good you took your medicine. I was worried there.>Yeah dude. I'm good now. I'm good. ▶ №12606117[Quote]>>12606141>>12606144>>12606157>>12606808>>12608890
>>12605561Having regained your composure, you ask Cobson if he has Soylent.
<Sorry, but we don't have any Soylent. We have some dairy-based alternatives, though. Like Creamlent. They say it's supposed to taste just like the real thing. Would you be interested in that?What do you do?
▶ №12606141[Quote]
>>12606117ask for gollem approved height reduction pills
▶ №12606235[Quote]
Check for kentucky fried crickets since they are your heckin comfort food or something
▶ №12606808[Quote]>>12608838
>>12606117Shrug and ask for some to try, can't be too bad
▶ №12608838[Quote]>>12608855>>12608880>>12608917
>>12606808>>12606157>>12606144Normally, hearing this would have sent you into a frenzy, and you probably would have ripped his face off.
Not today, though. Right now, your head is clear. You're a well adjusted, decent human being who doesn't do things like that. And you know what? You're open to trying new things. Maybe Creamlent isn't that bad. You can even overlook the barbaric mistreatment of cows in factory farms.
>Yeah, that sounds awesome!You and Cobbert make your way to the drinks section and you look for the Creamlent. Upon finding it, you rifle through the flavors, settling upon Peach. You like peaches, so it'll probably be good. Also, it has 6000,000 live and active cultures! Probiotics are a superfood!
Cobbert has picked out a Sproke, even though he prefers Monster.
<If you don't like it, you can have my Sproke.>It's okay man, you don't have to do that!<Just saying.What do you do?
▶ №12608855[Quote]>>12610182
>>12608838oh my fauci is that… WATER WITH A COOL LOGO AND ITS IN A CAN (its just normal water but its got a sick name and it costs 50 bucks) and oreos
▶ №12608880[Quote]
>>12608838YOU VILL BUY THE OVERPRICED GAS STATION SUSHI AND YOU VILL TRIP BALLS CUS THERE ALL COVERED IN LSD
▶ №12608917[Quote]
>>12608838get distracted by all the heckin wholesome fidget toys
▶ №12610182[Quote]>>12610243>>12610995
>>12608855<Oh, they have ossessione water.You turn to see what Cobbert's looking at.
>Yeah? You like that stuff? I thought only crotchety old millenials and bougies drank it.<It just tastes nice, alright? I think it's cause of all the minerals. They give it a rich flavor.>Yeah, okay old man. Anyway, why's there oreos attached it it? Does it come with oreos??<I mean not usually<But IDK<Europeans are weird.>God damn, and it costs 100 bucks too! No way we can get this, I only have 30 in my wallet! And is that even including the oreos?<I could pay for it.>With what money?? You're not loaded either, Cobbert!<I could make monthly payments.>Do you really want a fuckin' Ossessione that bad?Cobbert is silent.
Then you both burst into chuckling and you put it back.
What do you do?
▶ №12610243[Quote]>>12611043
>>12610182Mix the sproke with every single drink in the store to make an ultimate drink known as “proke”.
▶ №12610995[Quote]
>>12610182Pay for your loot like a decent human being
▶ №12611043[Quote]>>12611272
>>12610243An idea occurs to you.
>Man.. what if we combined like.. every single drink in this store.. to make like.. the ultimate drink. And it'd be called Poke.Cobbert stares at you for a moment.
<That's.. the most genius idea I've ever heard.<I think Cobson might beat us up if we did though.>Oh yeah, true. That guy's a fuckin' giant. Abnormal titan. Don't wanna get on his bad side. But I'd do it in any other store. No questions asked.<We could mix the Sproke and Creamlent though.>Hey, that'd actually probably make it edible! Yeah, let's do that. What'd we call it though?<Uhhh…<Croke?>You a frog or something?<Fuck off man.What do you do?
▶ №12611087[Quote]
looped threads wnbag
▶ №12611272[Quote]>>12611582>>12620729
>>12611043Go to the counter and pay first so you have free reign to enact your genius idea
▶ №12611582[Quote]>>12613561>>12613565>>12616317>>12617164>>12620656>>12633612
>>12611272You walk to the counter, trying to ignore the allure of the heckin' wholesome fidget toys on the shelves as you go.
You and Cobbert set your drinks in front of Cobson and pull out your wallets to give him the money. The total is an eye-watering, dream-shattering 75 dollars: 55 for the Creamlent and 20 for the Sproke.
You bite back your rage. Normally, you would kill over this. But the meds are still flowing through your body, and so you pay up.
Cobbert paid for most of it, but in the end both of you spent all your money, except for one singular quarter remaining in your wallet. And in this economy, a quarter will get you absolutely nothing at all.
<Is that all?>Yeah.<Would you like to donate to the Lesotho Buy-A-Goat charity today?You pause.
WILL you be a decent human being spend your last quarter on a good cause?
▶ №12613561[Quote]
>>12611582Every penny helps, also you might even get a black bull to fuck your wife from karma or however the buddhism goes, how could you tell?
▶ №12613565[Quote]>>12613643
>>12611582feral shoots cobson in the head or something
▶ №12613567[Quote]>>12613571
how is this thread still alive
▶ №12613643[Quote]
>>12613565he wouldnt do that because he is on his meds
▶ №12614681[Quote]
Op where are you
▶ №12617164[Quote]
>>12611582Don't bother donating, you need to save that money after your little splurge
▶ №12617747[Quote]
Up fuggen jardee
▶ №12620620[Quote]
Bvmq
▶ №12620656[Quote]>>12659845
>>12611582gta 5 style quickswap back to soyak
▶ №12620729[Quote]
>>12611272meds start to wear off and you give it to a bum on the side of the street out of spite
▶ №12626604[Quote]
go up
▶ №12627323[Quote]
Bumo
▶ №12628357[Quote]
bump
▶ №12628815[Quote]
stay up
▶ №12633377[Quote]
Bumprald
▶ №12633391[Quote]>>12650570
>>12567862will you ever make anything except for adventure GEMS
▶ №12633612[Quote]>>12634395>>12634410
>>12611582Keep the quarter, there might be a gumball machine in the future geg
▶ №12636608[Quote]
I miss the Aryan who made the STB video
▶ №12641313[Quote]
VP for when the update comes
▶ №12641894[Quote]
Up
▶ №12643176[Quote]
bumorald
▶ №12643460[Quote]
>>12616317You feel a well of indignation rise up in you. Are you really expected to donate the very last of your money? It's not like a single quarter would change anything in Lesotho anyway, and YOU need that cash to get by! You're suffering too! Is it really your job to do this when billionaire assholes won't even give Lesotho a single cent?? THEY should be helping them, not poor downtrodden folx like you! Get fuckin' Jeff Bezos or something to do it, and shoot him while you're at it! YOU CAN'T HELP THEM!!! YOU JUST CAN'T, OKAY???
You shake your head.
>No thank you.<Alright. Have a nice day!<You too!You storm out the door, Cobbert following close behind.
▶ №12643465[Quote]>>12643472
>>12634502please delete this find God
▶ №12643469[Quote]>>12643473
Having left the store, you turn to Cobbert, smirking.
>You ready?
<Yeah. Yeah I am.
He hands you the Sproke can and you crack it open, then pour the Creamlent inside. It immediately starts bubbling and overflowing, spilling onto the ground in a mottled mess. The pink of the Creamlent has mixed with the dark brown of the Sproke, producing a light brown liquid of slightly viscous consistency.
You extend the desecrated bottle in front of Cobbert.
>Wanna be the first person in the world to try Croke?
<I don't have a choice, do I?
Cobbert takes the can and hesitantly drinks. He immediately gags, but still manages to gulp it down. His face scrunches into an agonized expression.
>How is it?
You grin.
Cobbert coughs.
<It's not good.
>C'mon, it can't be that bad, you big baby. Hand it over.
He passes you the Croke, and you take a swig.
It really is that bad.
The Creamlent has curdled, forming a lumpy texture that makes you retch. The taste is equally awful. Coke and milk do not mix at all. And the Sprite just makes it taste like piss.
You spray it out on the pavement, but frustratingly the taste won't leave your mouth no matter how much you spit.
>God, no, it's bad. It's bad.
>You got any water, Cobbert?
<Nope.
<Would if we got the Ossessione though.
>Shut. Up.
▶ №12643473[Quote]>>12643494>>12643550
>>12643469dont use Gods name in vain its haram
▶ №12643485[Quote]>>12643629>>12645366>>12648694>>12649372>>12649450>>12649482>>12649728>>12649764
Your mood suddenly sours, and you slink down onto the pavement, leaning your head in your hand.
>Man, spent the last of my cash on some shit I didn't even get to drink. Now I got nothing. Dead broke.
>And I'm not like you, with your grandparents to keep you fed. My fuckin' fascist landlord's gonna kick me out any day now. I've already delayed rent for a month.
Cobbert nods solemnly.
<Yeah.. pretty fucked dude.
<Actually, did you hear about the new program?
>New program?
<Yeah, like the program the government's rolling out.
>I don't wanna hear about Blumf's bullsh*t right now, Cobbert.
<Wait, wait! But it might help. Look.
<So do you remember when they rolled out the state mandated girlfriends three years ago?
>Yeah, I fuckin' remember alright. Poor undocumented immigrants just wanted a better life, and Drumpf forced them to choose between going back to poverty in their home country or marrying a fucking incel. It was inhuman. Nobody should have to make that choice.
>Where are you going with this?
<Apparently, they’ve got a new system like that, where if you can prove without a doubt that you can't possibly get a job, no matter how hard you try, they'll give you a Jobcel Cerificate and they'll pay you for the rest of your life.
Your eyes light up.
>You mean… I can get paid for doing nothing?
<Yeah, as long as you can keep it certified. They test you every month.
>Shit, that sounds easy as fuck! Where do I sign up?
<Well, there's that welfare office down the road. Probably can do it there.
What do you do?
▶ №12643550[Quote]
>>12643473Are you talking to Feraljak??
▶ №12643629[Quote]>>12659844
>>12643485Visit the website to see the requirements, giving your personal information to Palantir Spyware™ in the progress (this won't have negative consequences later trust me feral)
▶ №12645366[Quote]
>>12643485rub yourself with croke to look homeless like those brave immigrants so you can get a jobcel paycheck.
▶ №12648694[Quote]
>>12643485Check the requirements first so you can begin to plan ahead for your jobcel application
▶ №12649226[Quote]
Bump
▶ №12649372[Quote]
>>12643485Punch yourself for being mean to that poor guy!!!
▶ №12649482[Quote]
>>12643485Ask cobbert to do a backflip
▶ №12649554[Quote]>>12649916
>>12649450marge what other guy
▶ №12649728[Quote]
>>12643485Ask cobbert to punch you for being an evil bourgiouse chud
▶ №12649916[Quote]>>12649983
>>12649554I think he was referring to the corpo guy that feraljak tried to strangle to death, he prolly just went home
▶ №12649983[Quote]
>>12649916yeah he drove off earlier
▶ №12650570[Quote]
>>12633391I already make a lot of other OC, I just don't tell you about it because that'd ruin the fun of posting anonymously. The only things I'll tell you I've done are other adventure threads because they're similar enough in style it'd be pretty easy to tell I made them anyway.
If you're asking more broadly about creative projects in general, I do also make a lot of art and comics outside of the sharty. You'll get to see those when the website goes up, since it'll be hosting all my art & comics, not just Save the Bull. I think you'll enjoy them a lot too.
<reddit space<reddit space<reddit spaceALSO, A QUICK MESSAGE TO YOU GUYS:
I know that updates can take a while, and that will be doubly the case when I go back to school soon and my time is taken up by classwork. Because of this, a lot of suggestions can pile up before I release the next panel. but don't be discouraged by this! As long as your reply is still applicable, I will use it, even if it was posted several panels ago.
I will still do my best to keep updates coming consistently THOUGH, even when school starts and I'm more busy. The hardest part of making these is the writing and brainstorming, and I can do that even when I'm at school.
Anyway, thanks for all the support, and keep 'jakking, 'teens!
▶ №12652357[Quote]
Upupup
▶ №12653902[Quote]
BVMQ
▶ №12655766[Quote]
stay up
▶ №12656969[Quote]
bumperald
▶ №12659844[Quote]
>>12643629You decide to check out their website to see if you can get more information on applying.
>Hey, what's the site for it?<It's cel.gov/jobcel.>Alright, sick.You load up the website, which prompts you with a screen that is blank aside from a button saying 'Enter'. You press it without a second thought.
A loading screen appears, which cuts into a wall of strange blue text and symbols. It goes by too fast for you to read and flickers out, replaced with the site's homepage. You shrug off the interruption. Probably a glitch or something. Nothing important.
You click on the 'Information' section and read through it.
>God damn! 240,000 dollar salary? That's as much as a cubicle worker makes! And you're telling me I get that for doing nothing??<Yeah man. It's pretty good.>Free meals?? No waiting in line for flights? Even resetting my credit score? This fuckin' rocks!You quickly navigate to the "Verification" section, where you are prompted to enter your name and phone number to receive a call code.
>Oh yeah, I guess this is like the DMV, right. Gotta wait in line.<Yeah, makes sense.The code pops up.
>856???? What the hell?? There can't be that many people here!<Uh…You crane your head to get a better view of the parking lot behind the welfare office.
Fuck.
It looks as if you're going to be here a while.
▶ №12659845[Quote]>>12659977>>12663393>>12663420
>>12429773>>12620656You are Soyak.
You were about to be pummeled within an inch of your life, but in the nick of time you managed to duck down and put the crystal ball to your mouth, momentarily saving you from Lil Doorknob's wrath.
Impish sits perched on top of the truckbed's rim, waving at you.
>How's it going?What do you do?
(As a refresher, you can ask Impish anything about the environment in his sphere of influence, including peoples' mental state.)
▶ №12659847[Quote]
I’ve got a question - do you guys cross dress for self expression or is it just a knk?
Discussion
I see a lot of the time that fem guys are immediately s*xualized - and I’ve come across some weird “sissification” tropes that make normal trans people and feminine presenting guys look almost pathetic. It is quite misogynistic because it gives the idea that femininity is all about being weak, degraded and a “slut”. I don’t want to shame anybody who is in this community, I’m just curious to know if it’s actually a part of who you are rather than some weird ftsh.
▶ №12659977[Quote]>>12672656
>>12659845Tell impish to look around and see if there is anything that can save you from Lil Doorknob's wrath
▶ №12663393[Quote]>>12674955
>>12659845Ask if impish can somehow calm lil doorknob down
▶ №12663420[Quote]
>>12659845Give him a kiss for good luck
▶ №12672656[Quote]>>12672686>>12672965
>>12659977>Hey, um.. could you see if there's anything that can save me from him beating me up?Impish gets up and clambers around the ledge, surveying the scenery.
<Well, there's your gun and bayonet, but it's behind him, so you probably couldn't reach it in time. However -He points to Lil Doorknob's gun, which leans against a corner.
<His gun is within your direct line of reach, if you're fast enough. It has 3 bullets left, so there'd be enough to get some shots off. You could also just hit him with it.<However, it's a risky maneuver. You don't actually want to hurt the fellow, especially since his friends wouldn't take kindly to that at all.<Honestly, from your perspective, maybe the best option is to just lie down and take it.He pauses.
<BUT! Maybe if you pointed the gun at him, it might buy you some time to talk reason into him. After all, the main concern right now is those two police cars that are still on your tail. Surely a decent, pragmatic man like him would understand priorities.You attempt to nod, but realize you're still frozen in time and can't move.
>Yeah, that makes sense! I know I can convince him, especially if I just explain I didn't really mean to say the N word! He's a nice guy, and I don't blame him for getting upset…<Mhm! For sure.<Speaking of the cops, I expect you might want some information on them too, yes?What do you do?
▶ №12672686[Quote]
>>12672656eat a sootmas tree
▶ №12672965[Quote]>>12674949
>>12672656ask him why the chud was able to move in stopped time
▶ №12674949[Quote]>>12750736
>>12672965You ask Impish how the chudcel was able to move in stopped time (or to be more accurate, slowed down time, since here a single second feels as long as 10 minutes).
<Well, that's because he wasn't actually moving at all!<You see, right now you're in the Astral Plane. But you're not technically in the Astral Plane, because you can only interact with it through me.<I act like a tool that you can interface with the Astral with.<Right now, since you're inexperienced, all you can do is talk to me, but with more practice, you can use me to directly interact with your environment. Like getting used to a new car. Oh, I mean, bike. Sorry.<That chud was someone with more experience, and so he was able to do more.>So what was that? He said something about.. Soydueling?<That's right! He initiated a soyduel with you.<You see, my power basically works through electrical signals. I can sense them or transmit them, but the problem with transmission is that over a certain distance the accuracy is lost.<So for that reason, it's very difficult to transmit signals into others' brains.<However, simple, compressed thoughts, or 'memes', can travel much longer while retaining potency.<What he was using are 'soyjaks' - highly concentrated thoughts that serve as an extremely effective way of memetic warfare, used to break down an opponent's psyche.Memetics.. you remember reading about that in the scientific journals you used to enjoy, before the scientific establishment became bigoted and corrupted.
>I guess that does make sense. But.. Soyjaks? I think I've heard of those. Bigots post them, right? You're saying they can be used to hurt people?<..Yes. But those images online are more like flawed reflections of those 'memes'. The real thing exists in your head, and the way they're really created is through refinement.<Much like coal is compressed into a diamond, a thought is compressed into a soyjak: either through iteration through various people, or through constant rumination, it sheds its unnecessary parts.<Like in an argument, or, more likely, in its aftermath when the loser is replaying it in his head.>Wow. Okay. This is a lot. So these bigoted wojaks are like, psychic weapons. I guess if that's the case… I might have to use them, as problematic as that is.>If they're just thoughts, does that mean I can just steal them when they're thrown at me and hurl them right back?<Well, yes, with enough concentration and practice, you can 'catch' soyjaks when they're being used on you, despite the severe distress they cause. But throwing them right back is ill-advised, since overuse of a specific soyjak dilutes its power. To properly soyduel, you need ones the other duelist doesn't have, or to use them before he does.>…I see. Are there any other ways to find soyjaks?<Apart from creating them, which is incredibly difficult, they can be found as residue in places where someone made one. You'll be able to see them when you're in the Astral Plane. You can also see them from far away as those glimmering stars you see around you. Those represent anything or anyone with a high amount of aura, and they're visible from very far away, proportional to their power.>Yeah, I was wondering what those were. Okay. I can handle this. I can handle this.>Oh, um, wait a second. How did he know to use his crystal?<With practice, you can sense when someone is about to use their crystal, so you can sync up yours with theirs and initiate a duel.>Huh. Okay.This is a lot to take in. On one hand, this is kind of flippin' badass. This is basically like The Force, right? It's like you're Luke Skywalker, and Impish is like Yoda. But on the other hand, the whole system is founded upon bigotry and homophobia… Well, you'll just have to be the change the world needs, you comfort yourself. You'll use your powers for good, peace and democracy. And you'll NEVER let fascism win.
▶ №12674955[Quote]>>12678556>>12678578>>12678581>>12678648>>12678659>>12678703
>>12663393>But.. I really, really don't want to point a gun at an innocent BIPOC person. Is there any other way I can calm him down? Can't you do anything?Impish puts his finger to his chin thoughtfully, and then phases through Lil Doorknob, digging around for a moment. Then, he pops out, looking down at you.
<Aha!>What is it?<I found a tag from a Nintendo Switch in his pocket! You two can bond over being gamers! That'll be sure to calm him down, right?>I… um, yeah, that really might work! If I just call on his emotional memories of Link's quest to save Zelda, I know he'll come to his senses!What do you do?
▶ №12678556[Quote]
>>12674955wait for the 10 minutes to run out so you can move again
▶ №12678578[Quote]
>>12674955Nigga just dragging it🤦🏿🥀
▶ №12678581[Quote]>>12680686
>>12674955Ask xim about the heckin' pigs
▶ №12678606[Quote]
what do oldsois see in these threads? this is stupid as fuck
▶ №12678648[Quote]>>12678652>>12680690
>>12674955Desperately ask Lil Doorknob if he's play Super Smash Bros Ultimate before he fucking kills you after the 10 minutes run out
▶ №12678659[Quote]>>12678666
>>12674955you call your long time friend big brap joe to come and calm him down
he looks like a normal nigger but he has super abilities
picrel is him
▶ №12678703[Quote]
>>12674955ask the nigger, how new nintendo games aren't overpriced
▶ №12678755[Quote]
>>12678734geeeeeeeeg nameroll
▶ №12680690[Quote]>>12680735>>12680860>>12680869>>12680876>>12680907
>>12678648You wait for the time to run out so you can move again. It drags on for ages, agonizing minute after minute. Is this really 10 minutes? It feels like more than that.
Finally, you are released from your limbo.
Immediately, you scurry out of the way of Lil Doorknob's attack, narrowly avoiding his fists as they slam down.
You back against the corner, raising your hands in surrender.
>Wait! Please, please! Y-you have a Switch, right? D-do you like playing games? Me too!<NIGGA I'S STOLE THAT SHIT TO PAWN IT. ION GIVE NO FUCK ABOUT NO GAMES WYBOI, I GON KILL YO RACIS ASS!!!>Wh-y-you mean you don't play Smash Bros?<YEAH I PLAY SMASH SOMETIMES NIGGA WHAT OF IT??Lil Doorknob is quickly advancing upon you, undeterred by your pleas.
What do you do?
▶ №12680735[Quote]>>12680869>>12681081
>>12680690double down and call him a nigga
▶ №12680860[Quote]
>>12680690try to calm him down by mentioning your switch collection
▶ №12680869[Quote]>>12681081
>>12680735>>12680690this but tell him people you used to play with would use the word a lot so you didn't mean it
▶ №12680876[Quote]
>>12680686>>12680690Faggot writing in the big 25 🥀 I’m trans btw like actually trans and I wish i was a woman so bad
▶ №12680907[Quote]
>>12680690Use the heckin’ force
▶ №12681081[Quote]>>12681095>>12681159
>>12680735>>12680869You decide to double down and say the n-word again.
>Please, nigga! I'm sorry!>The folx I used to play with used that word a lot, and they didn't mean anything bigoted by it! They were reclaiming it! It's just habit!Lil Doorknob stops in his tracks, staring wide-eyed at you. It seems your sheer brazenness has caught him off guard. He actually seems kind of confused. You can sense the gears turning in his head, struggling to make sense of your actions even as he shakes with rage.
What do you do?
▶ №12681095[Quote]
>>12681081Summon a goonhitler
▶ №12681159[Quote]
>>12681081Use this time to pint out that there are still cops on our tail so if he wants to beat the shit out of you he can do it at least when we get out of this situation(or preferably never)
▶ №12681377[Quote]
>>12681321Ram into xim with your rear so xe falls out of the truck or something
▶ №12681970[Quote]>>12683201
>>12681321Apologize for assuming he's gay
▶ №12682548[Quote]>>12682588>>12682726
>>12681348You summon goon hitler, but all he does is goon inside your butthole and twerk on the troubled scholar.
This seems to make the troubled scholar happier and more calm
—>AWW HELL YEAH NIGGA SHAKE THAT SHII—
he then goes away.
What do you do?
▶ №12682588[Quote]
>>12682548not me but made me geg
▶ №12683201[Quote]>>12683676>>12683972>>12686063>>12689701
>>12681348>>12681970You quickly pull up your pants and apologize.
>I apologize for assuming you had that orientation… it was wrong of me and violated your consent, and I'm deeply sorry.<Whatever mane just don't show me dat nasty damn asscrack again.He relaxes a little bit in relief, but is still on guard.
To try and calm him, you decide to show him a picture of your pet goonhitler.
>Isn't she adorable? Her name's Precious. She's such a sweet little goober and she makes me laugh every day! She only bites sometimes but they usually deserve it.Doorknob looks at the picture and blinks, then smiles a little.
<Hey… dat look like my old dog from my mama house. She cute.What do you do?
▶ №12683676[Quote]>>12683869>>12701091
>>12683201point out the cops are still chasing you so you need to get back to shooting o algo
▶ №12683972[Quote]>>12701091
>>12683201Bond with Lil doorknob over the goonhitler while enacting your plan to shatter the piggies' morale
▶ №12686009[Quote]
VP
▶ №12686063[Quote]>>12701100
>>12683201lil nigga gets shot in the head by a police
▶ №12689701[Quote]
>>12683201Goon to goon Hitler
▶ №12691765[Quote]
'VP
▶ №12698408[Quote]>>12698419
Up though
▶ №12698419[Quote]>>12698454>>12698670
>>12698408Almost done with the next panel, will be posting soon
▶ №12698670[Quote]
>>12698419adeventureDiety
▶ №12701091[Quote]
>>12683972>>12683676You remind Lil Doorknob that the police are still chasing you and must be dealt with.
<Oh yeah, word.He quickly assumes his station with his gun once more. Both of you hide behind the trunk for cover, and he periodically pokes his head out to fire shots in the direction of the police car.
Being that the officer with the machine gun is firing a constant stream of bullets, there isn't much you can do at the moment, and so you resolve to pass the time by showing Lil Doorknob more pictures of your goonhitler.
>Here's her taking a swim! She loves swimming!>Aww, here she is on her third birthday! Look at how happy she is! She loved the bugmeal cake I made for her!>She loves baths too! She always whines if she doesn't have her rubber ducky.>And look at her smiling! Isn't she just the cutest widdle goonerino?>Look, that's her watching TV with me! Her favorite movie is Infinity War. I give her treats at the exciting parts. She likes cuddling on my legs, but she gets mad if I move around too much!>And um - errm - she does bring me little presents occasionally!>Oh, and there's us going on walkies together! She gets so excited to see all the people and animals, although I have to hold her back sometimes, heh heh.>AWWWWWW!!! And there's Precious when she was just a grubling! She was so small, I could fit her in the palm of my hand! Her widdle eyes hadn't even opened yet!>Oh? The other grub in that picture? That's her little brother, but he's not here anymore. She, um, ate him. I know, I know, but it's normal for goonhitlers.>Pfft, awwe! Look, that's when I did her hair up! She hates when I do that, but she just looks so darned cute!Lil Doorknob listens, enraptured, smiling and chuckling along with you. It seems that your stories are calling to mind his own fond memories.
<Man, dat li'l thang get up to all kindsa stuff huh? Remind me of back when I'd go round the block with my dog n' he'd keep tryna eat raisin. Dumass. I say why you eatin' raisin for, and he look at me like I taken a feast from him!>Heheh, yeah, they are like that. Precious keeps trying to eat stainless steel, but it's not good for her stomach! ▶ №12701110[Quote]>>12701173>>12701184>>12701294>>12701295>>12701317>>12703424
Your ease was misplaced, however, because only moments later you feel a jolt and slam against the side of the trunk.
It appears that in a last-ditch effort, the chudcel is trying a PIT maneuver on the car, ramming it to make it spin out of control.
Up in the front of the truck, Jamal and Big Samson raise alarm.
<FUCK WAS THAT? SHIET SHIET SHIET, HIT THE GAS NOW!!
^On it.
Big Samson hits the pedal as hard as he can, lurching the car forward as he tries desperately to steady the swerving car. He manages it this time, but next time he won't be so lucky.
You look back at the police car, only a few feet away from your face. The chud is making eye contact with you, and his expression tells everything. He knows that his car is bigger, and in a crash, you're the ones who will die, not him. This racist prick thinks he's won.
What do you do?
▶ №12701152[Quote]
when you're done with this seemingly endless adventure thread, I kindly request transparent PNGs of all of the characters
thank you in advance OP
▶ №12701173[Quote]>>12728752
>>12701110ask for a g*n and shoot at the bigot. He can't dodge if he's driving, it will as easy as bugpie
▶ №12701184[Quote]
>>12701110throw a shoe at the bigot (just like muh heckin iraqi journalist)
▶ №12701294[Quote]>>12702358>>12728752
>>12701110the twp chudcel's evil racist grin fills you with rage, reminding you of that fat bigoted conservative you dealt with earlier
you uncontrollably shake and seethe as if your rage was granted by feral itself
grab lil' doorknobs gun and slime dat nigga instantly
▶ №12701295[Quote]
>>12701110flash him with your 'slot to repulse him and buy more time
▶ №12701317[Quote]
>>12701110yolo it and soyduel the chud, the ameteur shouldn't be too hard
▶ №12701386[Quote]>>12728748
let out the feeblest most nasal fuck you and give him a middle finger
▶ №12702204[Quote]
bump
▶ №12702219[Quote]
>New thread because the old one is broken for some reason
><reddit space
>In a last-ditch effort, you point out the chud's leakage, doing your best to remember your rhetorical tactics from Xitter.
>>Hey um.. aren't you getting kind of mad?
><NO RETARD I'M NOT MAD I'M JUST MAKING FUN OF YOU FAGGOT
>>I-If you're not mad, why are you still replying?
><BECAUSE IM MAKING YOU SEETHE AND ITS FUNNY KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK UR SO MAD RIGHT NOW
>>But I-I'm not mad, I don't even wanna continue this conversation you're the one continuing it
><THEN WHY ARE YOU TALKING HUH WHY ARE YOU TALKING NIGGER
><WAIT
><YOU'RE JUST TRYING TO DISTRACT ME FROM SOYDUELING AREN'T YOU
><WELL IT WON'T WORK
><I'M NOT A RETARD LIKE YOU
>Despite his words, a good 7 of the 10 minutes have already passed, during most of which the power of his soyduel was dampened by his leakage.
><YOU FUCKING CUCK NIGGER BASTARD!!! I'LL KILL YOU!! I'LL ACK YOU OBSESSED NIGGER!!
>He pours all of his remaining strength into his attack for the remaining three minutes, but the damage has already been done.
>You snap out of the stopped time and crumple to the truckbed, the orb clattering out of your hand. You are extremely disoriented, aching all over, barely able to stand - but not completely mindbroken.
>You can hear the screams and gunshots of the ongoing gunfight. Low Life's car is swerving even more erratically, and seems as if it may crash any minute. The officer who attacked you in the Astral Plane has now diverted his attention solely to you, and is now raining all his bullets towards the truckbed you're in. What do you do?
▶ №12702358[Quote]
>>12701294Schizorald to this
▶ №12702405[Quote]
Enter a soyduel against the driver chud
▶ №12703424[Quote]>>12703441
>>12701110yell at him to stop that because words are weapons just like in your favorite hecking wholesome indie game of all time, dustbowl
▶ №12706128[Quote]
bvmo
▶ №12709554[Quote]
Up
▶ №12710999[Quote]
Bumperald
▶ №12714689[Quote]
up
▶ №12720032[Quote]
upwards
▶ №12722355[Quote]
VPERQLD
▶ №12723305[Quote]
>>12701100Goonhitler comesback from the dead miraculously
▶ №12726832[Quote]
bumo
▶ №12728748[Quote]>>12728761
>>12701386You give him the middle finger and let out the feeblest most nasal fuck you.
In response, he levels his own middle finger at you mockingly.
You are furious.
▶ №12728752[Quote]
>>12701173>>12701294The sheer rage invoked in you at this moment could not be measured on any scale. You can't take this f*cking bigotry right now. This f*cking chud has to die.
>Doorknob, give me my gun.<Nigga get it yoself, i aint yo muthafuckin slave!Hurt by the implication of his rude words, you grab your gun and shakily aim it at the officer. Despite your anger, you hesitate. Sure, you've mustered the courage to use a gun… but k*lling someone with it? Even a nazi pissbaby chudcel? It sends a chill down your spine.
But this is a life or death situation, and even if you'd let yourself be killed, you'd never forgive yourself for letting your bull die. So, you brace yourself and fire.
…
Oh. Bulletproof glass. You don't know how you didn't consider that.
▶ №12728757[Quote]>>12728761
The impact crumples the cruiser like a tin can, sending it spinning across the road and into the railing.
The other car backs up and disappears down the lane, clearly not considering the chase worth it after witnessing such a gruesome spectacle.
Cheers erupt from the car.
<YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
<THAT'S MY NIGGA!! THAT'S MY FUCKIN' NIGGA, MAN!! FUCKIN' STRAIGHT!!
^Mane, I ain't neva seen anything like dat in my life. Shit was like a Beyblade.
<Forreal! That thing a got damn tank!
^Yeah… he gon have to ditch it though. Too recognizable.
<Oh yeah, shee, that camo.
^Yup.
<Man, you serious? Why we have to ditch that thing? It's badass!
To get the police off your trail, Big Samson takes a route through the highway's underground tunnel system. The immediate threat gone, you permit yourself a measure of relaxation.
Lil Doorknob pipes up.
<Hey, let's get some Mickey D's!
^Nigga, we has to go patch up Low Life's wounds. He hurt pretty bad. Aint got no time for McDonald's. We gotta go to, uh, Walgreens.
<Oh, okay, word.
^'Sides, I like Long John Silver's better. Maybe we could get some after.
<YOU MUTHAFUCKA!! I'LL FUCKING CAP YOU NIGGA!!!
<Shit, McDonald's don't sound too bad.
^Whateva mane. They nuggets taste like cardboard.
<THAT'S WHY YOU PUT THE SAUCE ON THEM, DUMASS!!
^A good nugget don't need no sauce.
<Oh my god mane…
<You soundin' kinda like a whitey.
^Look. Y'all seen my gumbo, I likes spice as much as any of you. But sauce is 'sposed to complementarize the flavor, not destroy it.
<Destroyin's cool though. I likes destroyin' my food.
<Ayo, word! DESTRUCTION!
^You niggas are a lost cause.
▶ №12728791[Quote]>>12730734
what if all the chudjaks were just normal police officers and soyak is hallucinating as a method to cope o algo
▶ №12728845[Quote]>>12728856>>12767334
>>12728760request that they go to fuck yeah! burgers
▶ №12728862[Quote]
>>12728856thanks, I left the supersage there by accident
▶ №12731183[Quote]
Go to the mcsoyslops and eat a bigmac there or something. Also your pet goonhitler comes back from the dead miraculously
▶ №12732911[Quote]
Bumpering
▶ №12733616[Quote]
Upwards
▶ №12739768[Quote]>>12740660
is op dead, how could you tell?
▶ №12740660[Quote]>>12742695
>>12739768no, this is just slowburn, the updates come every 1 or 2 days
▶ №12742776[Quote]
>>12742695a new panel gets posted every 1-2 days, what do you not understand
▶ №12744757[Quote]
up
▶ №12747110[Quote]
>>12745915I have a dream that one day that more gemventure threads will be like op's and go on for years
▶ №12750502[Quote]
>>12745915ok, its good to now that you are not a dead nigger baby
▶ №12750802[Quote]
>>12728760go to mcdonalds but inside the store
▶ №12756156[Quote]
selfish bump
▶ №12758758[Quote]
bumping it upwards
▶ №12762611[Quote]
up
▶ №12762621[Quote]>>12762668
Panels will be completely finished in 3 days. stay tuned
▶ №12762687[Quote]>>12762696
>>12762668anyways teens the panel will be done in 5 days
▶ №12762696[Quote]>>12762803
>>12762687BLEED. BLEED NIGGER. I'M WORKING ON IT RIGHT NOW AND IT'LL BE DONE TONIGHT
▶ №12762803[Quote]>>12762811
>>12762696meds your not me
panel will be done in one week though
▶ №12762883[Quote]>>12762897
>>12762811meds stop impersonating as me
panel will be done in a week
▶ №12762897[Quote]>>12762924
>>12762883THE PANEL WILL BE DONE TONIGHT. TONIGHT. AND YOU WILL BE RAPED. BY ME. KIKE NIGGER FAGGOT NIGGER JEW FAGGOT
▶ №12762924[Quote]>>12762957
>>12762897AND BY NIGHT I MEAN NIGHT IN AUSTRALIAN TIME
▶ №12764194[Quote]
Stop with the op bait and go up
▶ №12765531[Quote]
Bumorald
▶ №12767334[Quote]>>12767347
>>12728845You raise your hand and tentatively request that they go to Fuck Yeah! burgers.
There is silence for a moment, and then they break into snickering.
Jamal responds to you mirthfully.
<Shit nigga, why not? Howsabout we go to Fuck Yeah Burgers?^I's cool with dat. Still prolly better than McDonalds. Maybe them whiteboys know how to season too. Those ones with the beards like sum heat.<Maaan I mean. Y'know what, okay. Sure. Sure mane.Although you are not oblivious to the sensation of being mocked, you still take great joy in their agreement. You can show them just how heckin' awesome the f**d is there! It's your favorite drive-in dive for some authentic grub.
As the car continues towards its destination, you take the time to reflect on recent events. You just used a g*n to shoot at folks, and nearly k*lled someone. Even though you were only doing what you had to do, you feel a pit in your stomach. Also, you think earlier you may have felt that sensation Impish was talking about, like a spider sense where you can tell when people are about to use their orb. It was just a vague tingling sensation though, so you're not sure. You resolve to try and focus on it if you feel it again.
The two cars, yours and Low Life's, arrive at a CVS. The occupants of both step out, and the gang crowd around Low Life to survey his injuries. Big Samson speaks up.
^Damn nigga, they busted you up pretty bad, didn't they?<Yea^You think you gonna make it?<Yea, I've had worse.^…^Aight.^We gon get you patched up, okay mane? Just hang in there.<Doin' my best.<Fuck man, they got your whole hand! That's messed up!<That it is. That it is.<Man… you don't deserve this shiet. Don't die on me.<'Preciate it. Won't if I can help it.They stand around him in awkward murmuring for a moment, and then quickly turn to enter the store.
<We'll be back with the shit, okay!<Ight. im trans btw
▶ №12767361[Quote]
>>12767335Find security camera
▶ №12767381[Quote]>>12767844
>>12767335observe the donald tooth brush
▶ №12767405[Quote]
>>12767335observe the Big Boy Boo Boo Aids Mario! Multipurpose, PRAS, antisecptic skin cleanser and triple soy
▶ №12767833[Quote]>>12798134
>>12767335get those big boy boo boo aids mario edition for lil doorknob to apologize for throwing his shoe
▶ №12767844[Quote]>>12767865>>12767918>>12767929>>12769707>>12771896
>>12767381You observe the Donald Tooth Brush.
This thing disgusts you. Was it not enough for Drumpf to control every single aspect of your life? Does he need to invade basic human necessities as well?
It apparently includes 8 sayings. You shudder to think what the other 7 are.
What do you do?
▶ №12767865[Quote]
>>12767844I brush my eye with the tooth brush, eventually hurting my eyes
▶ №12767918[Quote]>>12772988
>>12767844throw the trump toothbrushes on the ground in a show of heckin epic defiance
▶ №12767929[Quote]
>>12767844Gather the courage to see what else the Trumpbrush says
▶ №12769707[Quote]
>>12767844Destroy the drumph tooth brushes
▶ №12771896[Quote]
>>12767844try tQ ignQre the heckin trVmp tQQthpaste
▶ №12773049[Quote]>>12798134
>>12772994sperg out and say that "ITS DA BIGOTED RACIST NAZI REPUBLICANS WHO MADE THIS TOOTHBRUSH SAY IT"
▶ №12773051[Quote]
<OP cannot 4 images
fuck Mustard ruined thread Adventure 1 image limit boring a fuck before limit post
▶ №12773092[Quote]
>>12772994you cover yourself in black so you blend in with the niggers
▶ №12774324[Quote]>>12789591
>>12772994Apologize and tell them you were trying to destroy them
▶ №12774360[Quote]
>>12728761why didn’t op do this
▶ №12775662[Quote]
>>12772994Goonhitler comes back from the dead
▶ №12778767[Quote]>>12779393
OP wake tf up
▶ №12790755[Quote]>>12791353
Goonhitler comes back from the dead and will arrive to see you soon
▶ №12791353[Quote]
>>12790755If it actually is true I dont think precious is coming back
▶ №12792026[Quote]>>12792080>>12811875
>>12772994wonder how Lil Doorknob got his shoe back
▶ №12794538[Quote]
bvmq
▶ №12797684[Quote]
upupupupupupupupupupupupup
▶ №12798134[Quote]>>12798477>>12798485>>12798504>>12798538>>12800614>>12805826>>12807158
>>12767833>>12773049You frantically try to explain yourself.
>N-no, it wasn't me! It was the b-bigoted rethuglicans- I-I mean the republinazis that made the toothbrush say it! Not me! I swear! I was trying - I was trying to destroy it!Panicking even more at being received with silence for a moment, you grab a box of Big Boy Boo Boo Aids: Mario Edition and hold them out to Lil Doorkob.
>H-here, t-take this! Um, a gift, to m-make up for it, and for throwing your shoe! I'll buy it! I-I'm sorry!Lil Doorknob looks you up and down and smirks.
<Oh yeah? If you really wanna make it up to me, how 'bout you pay for all the shit we gon' buy? Save us a lot of trouble.You freeze, and slowly glance down at the pile of gauze in his hand.
That's got to be up in the hundreds of dollars. There's no possible way you can afford that. Your weekly paycheck is only 300$, and you already spent most of it on Funkos.
But, if you declined, you'd be disrespecting a black king… and you've already committed enough micro-aggressions today.
What do you do?
▶ №12798477[Quote]
>>12798134steal the shit like a real nigga
ain't giving money to them rethuglican PIGS
▶ №12798494[Quote]
>>12678756>psoychedlicgay
hippie shit is for fags
▶ №12798504[Quote]
>>12798134try to steal the stuff and make a stealthy getaway
▶ №12798538[Quote]
>>12798134curl up into a ball and cry in a corner
▶ №12800614[Quote]
>>12798134Tell then that this racist biggot store doesn't deserve money and we should just steal this shit instead
▶ №12805826[Quote]
>>12798134Goonhitler comes back from the dead
▶ №12807158[Quote]>>12811759
>>12798134Give them a better idea by covering for them while they take everything not nailed to the wall instead
▶ №12809060[Quote]
Bumo
▶ №12811627[Quote]
Upwards
▶ №12811759[Quote]
>>12807158>>12798485You stutter, stumbling over yourself to try and find some kind of way out of this.
>Um… uhh.. umm.. we should just steal it..<Why? Not our money, you payin' for it.>Uhmm… because this racist store doesn't d-deserve money..<Ion care 'bout dat.Sweat beads down your forehead. Your mind races.
>W-what about.. I c-cover for you, as a decoy, buy like.. one thing.. and you can steal everything in the s-store..His face lights up.
<Shit, that ain't a bad idea! Alrite, but you better not fuck this up.He hands you two of the gauze packages. You nod gratefully, turn and head toward the register. Jamal and Big Samson quickly make their way further into the store to find anything worth stealing.
▶ №12811875[Quote]
>>12811771this is supposed to be doing
>>12792026 this suggestion btw i just forgot to add the post number
▶ №12811924[Quote]>>12819754
>>12811772rip off his neuralink off his head, killing him
▶ №12812033[Quote]
>>12811772force the neuralink thingy off the blumf supporting bigot and/or take his shoe for Lil Doorknob
▶ №12812215[Quote]
>>12811772Raise your voice to try and wake xim up
▶ №12816069[Quote]
BVMQ
▶ №12816158[Quote]
shave the bull!
▶ №12816491[Quote]
>>12811772Goonhitler survives and is back from the dead
▶ №12816867[Quote]
>>12811772channel all of your inner anger at the racist biggot toothbrush into your palm(like your le anime characters) and slap the cashier
▶ №12818359[Quote]
Up
▶ №12819754[Quote]>>12820870>>12820935
>>12811924You rip the neuralink thingy off his head. However, as this is merely a 7G transceiver module and not his Neuralink, which is at the back of his head, it does not kill him. However, the interruption jolts him from his reverie, and he turns his attention towards you.
<'Ude! 'ou 'idn't 'ave to 'o 'at! 'ot cool!<Okay, Okay, 'emme 'ee… 'at'll 'e 125 'ollars.<'ill 'at 'e all?You shudder. 125 dollars.. even these few packets cost more than you can afford. You only have 101 dollars in your wallet. And more pressingly, the gang are still looting the store, so you need to find a way to keep distracting him.
What do you do?
▶ №12820870[Quote]>>12827507
>>12819754Ask if xe accepts coupons
▶ №12820935[Quote]>>12827507
>>12819754Use tyrones EBT card to pay less
▶ №12821009[Quote]
'Up
▶ №12824139[Quote]>>12824172
Wake up OP
▶ №12824354[Quote]>>12824366>>12824541
also, OP here, question to you guys:
The website will be hosting all my adventure threads (like save the bull, HTSM in antarctica, jarty nigger lesotho adventure), but my question is:
Should the website also host OTHER people's adventure threads?
I'd put a disclaimer saying I didn't make them of course, but I just think it'd be useful to host other people's adventure threads so they don't have to rely on their thread getting looped to continue the story.
They could just post a link to their adventure on the site every time they make a new thread to catch people up to date. It'd be a good way of archiving people's threads.
▶ №12824398[Quote]>>12824428
>>12824366is his email the soysneed one?
▶ №12824428[Quote]
>>12824398Go to xis user page on the 'ki then youll find his contacts.
▶ №12827507[Quote]
>>12820935>>12820870You ask if he accepts coupons.
<'e 'o..You immediately pull out your wallet and procure a truly immense amount of coupons from it one by one, placing them on the table.
He sorts through them.
<'ese 'rn't 'oupons 'or 'is item! 'ese 'rn't even 'rom our store!!>Wait, wait, I know I have one in here.He is becoming increasingly irritated, so you decide a change of tactic is needed. You wave Jamal over.
>Hey! Jamal!<sup>Can you help me pay for this with your card?<sure maneJamal trudges up to the register and produces his EBT card, showing it to the clerk.
▶ №12828232[Quote]
>>12827510you grab jamal’s gun and shoot the cashier
but the gun isn’t actually jamal’s gun, it’s from a whole different dimension where everything is colorjaks and nonsense
yep that was the nonsense gun
▶ №12828265[Quote]>>12828269
>>12827510you call giganigga, the strongest nigga in the WORLD to throw him so far he goes to antarctica
▶ №12828269[Quote]
>>12828265you do that before he gets more suspicious
▶ №12830873[Quote]>>12860424
>>12827510call the bigot out for the heckkin' transophobe that xe is and xe should be ashamed for disrespecting such brave and proud black trans woman
▶ №12830893[Quote]
>>12827510Marge? why are same brown hair and green shirt?
1st image and 2nd image
▶ №12835254[Quote]
bullo im trans btw
▶ №12837267[Quote]
>>12827510Call xim a racist for noticing
▶ №12837271[Quote]
blasted blumo
▶ №12839408[Quote]>>12841240
hello teens, im making an adventure thread rn, but no one is responding
here is the link
https://www.soyjak.st/soy/thread/12839329.html▶ №12841240[Quote]
>>12839408meds i'm OP and you're not me
▶ №12841296[Quote]>>12841306
>>12841290Will goonhitler be back from the dead?
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Up no more pretending to be op
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Here's some absolute brimstone that (((chatgpt))) wrote for me when i asked it to act like a soyteen talking about SNCA
>alright /g/ or whatever, buckle in. this is gonna be one of those mega-brain essays where i unlock the secret of the universe by ranting about totally pointless minutiae that nobody asked for but somehow i care about more than my rent. grab your energy drink, adjust your RGB lightstrip to 4200k, and let me tell you why the direction your spoon faces in the sink is literally a socio-political statement.
>first off: toast. people don't get toast. they think toast is just bread with a past. WRONG. toast is a gradient of disappointment and triumph. there is a strict moral spectrum from "barely nudged" (the kind of toast made by people who respect other people's feelings) to "obliterated, carbonized rectangle of regret" (made by people who watched a 12-hour supercut of conspiracy videos and now live alone with 17 cats). the ideal toast lives in the Goldilocks zone: amber like a cheap anime protagonist's hair under studio lights. any deviation is peak cringe. mfw someone says "i like my toast white" — that's not toast, that's bread with dreams.
>next: spoon orientation. you think i'm memeing. i'm not. there's a right way to place spoons in the draining rack. handle to the left if you're an equilibrated human. handle to the right if you're auditioning for the role of "son who will inherit no property because he leaves spoons like a NEET." putting spoons upside down is a personality trait, like a browser history. i've seen people stack spoons like currency — insulting. your utensil feng shui reflects your entire WILL to live. based or cringe.
>fonts. god fonts. nobody talks about fonts enough. "Comic Sans" users should be IMMEDIATELY quarantined; it's not a font, it's a cry for help. kerning is the difference between "lover" and "lo ver" and that matters. if a word looks wrong, you will feel it in your molars. the betrayal of a well-laid-out document by one rogue typeface is worse than cold pizza. choose your fonts like you choose your friends: serif for trust, sans for efficiency, display fonts for people who think they’re creative directors but only design birthday invites for 2009.
>toothpaste cap etiquette: this is where civilization goes to die. cap on? cap off? click the cap back like a professional, for the love of all that is crisp. leaving the cap off is basically leaving the front door unlocked but for your teeth. and don't get me started on the "squeeze from the middle" degenerates. you squeeze from the bottom. there is an order to things. chaos begins at the tube.
>the temperature of milk. this is peak culture war. room temp milk people exist and they walk among us. milk should be either "straight from the fridge" (refreshing) or "near-boiling for a latte" (pretentious). lukewarm milk is a betrayal by a clock. if your milk sits somewhere between "courage" and "shame," you are an ideological hazard.
>toilet paper roll orientation: over > under, fight me. this is not even up for debate; it’s math. when it's over, you control the narrative. when it's under, you are surrendering to dark forces. also, those decorative square cuts at the edge? pointless. we live in a post-decorative era. tear responsibly.
>keyboard clickiness. there are two kinds of people: clickers and silent ancestors. mechanical keyboards with obnoxious switches are peak personality flex — you can hear someone's life choices through their switch. linear switches are for peaceful folks who want to write poetry about sunsets. tactile switches are for mid-level blog authors. clicky 80g actuations are for the man who will explain to you the difference between latency and l-o-r-e until 3am. keycap profiles? sculpted? flat? these are moral compasses.
>phone brightness at night. why do people have their phone brightness at 100% in bed? are you trying to communicate with satellites? turn your screen down. it's not an LED sun. sunglasses indoors is a vibe but also a cry for help. night mode exists for a reason — protect your retinas and your soul.
>plants you forget to water but still brag about. we all have that one plant we show off on our feeds like it's thriving when in reality it's a green skeleton on a budget. "oh my succulent is doing great" — no, it's faking it for the algorithm. plants are influencers now. the ones that survive purely on our neglect are peak survivors and deserve a medal; the others are just scammers with chlorophyll.
>the chair you sit in while browsing imageboards. ergonomic? amusingly rickety? the chair defines your posting energy. leather executive chairs = energy of someone who emails PDFs. beanbags = energy of a chaotic streamer who once washed their hair with motor oil. swivel chairs are for the thinkers who need to slowly turn toward truth. sit in your chair like you mean it.
▶ №12849306[Quote]
Nigger
▶ №12851701[Quote]
Umo, how could you tell?
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Up
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bumorald
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stay up
▶ №12860424[Quote]
>>12830873You release your full righteous fury on the chud.
>HOW DARE YOU??? HOW. DARE. YOU. DISRESPECTING A TRANS WOMAN OF COLOR, TRIGGERING HER DYSPHORIA. AREN'T YOU ASHAMED OF YOURSELF??The cashier stares at you, and you fear that he might respond with some smug, transphobic quip. But instead, he lowers his head in shame.
<'m 'orry, I 'dnt 'ean 'o… I'd 'ever 'o 'at 'o a 'rans MAGA 'ueen…It appears that due to Jamal's Kanye shirt, the cashier thinks he's a MAGA transwoman. You smirk. What an idiot! Jamal would never be a republinazi, he just knows how to separate art from the artist.
>Good. I'd better not see ANY transphobia from you again. It's fucking 2050. Grow up.He nods sheepishly.
▶ №12860470[Quote]>>12912598
>>12860426use the crystal ball
▶ №12860475[Quote]>>12861828
>>12860426Grab on the crystal and attempt to soyduel the clerk
▶ №12861828[Quote]>>12912598
>>12860475this but before trying to soyduel ask imp to look around and see if there are any items that might help you in case the soyduel fails
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save the bulatto!
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Up
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Bumo
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Uupup
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>>12860426Use the gun you have sneakily borrowed
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Bvmq
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Up
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Bumo
▶ №12879559[Quote]>>12880699>>12886792>>12900871
OP Here. I just raisined off a 5 story building and it landed on a nigger's head, I'm very excited.
Also save the buul has been delayed indefinitely because i'm lazy and my clitty's leaked
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>>12879559Snopes confirmed this to not be op
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Bumperald
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Bumq
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Just let this shit dragged thread die.
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Up
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Bump up
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Bumperald
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Bumo
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Upwards
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up
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>>12879559 Meds i'm working on the next panel right now n
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By.p
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gem goes up
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Up
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up
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Bumo
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soyve the bqqvll!!
▶ №12912598[Quote]
>>12861828>>12860470You put your hands up hurriedly, trembling.
>Okay! Okay! I can explain, I swear!Internally, you panic, wracking your brain for any way to get out of this.
An idea occurs to you, and you speak up, stumbling over your words.
>U-umm… I have asthma.. please, just let me get my inhaler from my pocket… I'll choke if I don't.. please… I'm not armed..He pauses, taken aback, but after examining your face relents.
<'ine.>Okay, thank you, thank you…You slowly, nervously reach down to your pocket and grasp the crystal ball's nozzle.
Then, in a flash, you pull it into your mouth.
In that split second, his eyes widen in shocked recognition.
<'AT'S 'OT-The world freezes, bathed in the familiar blue sheen.
▶ №12912601[Quote]>>12912759>>12917577>>12923997>>12929923
Looking around, you spot Impish perched on the clerk's shoulder.
<Hello again! Looks like you're in a bit of a pickle, huh?
<Seems like if you don't do something, you're getting a hole in your head!
You shudder.
>Yeah.. help me, please! Can I soyduel him?
<I'm afraid not. You can only soyduel someone else who has an orb.
Fear grips you, and you stutter out a response.
>O-okay, well, could you just..look around for anything useful? Anything?
<Sure thing! Are there any particular places you want me to search first? I can also show you what's going on in his Neuralink.
As you try to formulate an answer to his question, you notice that you feel a slight tingling sensation, not coming from your body but from in front of you, where the cashier is - almost like a limb that's fallen asleep.
What do you do?, how could you tell?
▶ №12912759[Quote]>>12945965
>>12912601Check xis neuralink like your hackers in you heckin kinos!
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seave the bool is back!
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Bump
▶ №12919306[Quote]>>12929735
how many times will mods revive this thread
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Bvmq
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Nigger
▶ №12923997[Quote]
>>12912601Tell impish to use xis heckin telekinesis to give you tryones gun.
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Go up
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Upo
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bump or something
▶ №12929735[Quote]
>>12919306doesn't know it's looped award
▶ №12929923[Quote]
>>12912601Ask impish to look into the cashier's thoughts to see if he wants to heckin' murder soyak
▶ №12931671[Quote]
'ump
▶ №12937421[Quote]
Uperald
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bump
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Upo
▶ №12944374[Quote]
'Up
▶ №12944379[Quote]
Go jp2
▶ №12945965[Quote]>>12946796>>12946886>>12947812>>12952061>>12986622
>>12912759You ask to check his Neuralink.
<As you wish! This is actually a good opportunity to put on your training wheels, so to speak. You have a tingly feeling coming from him, right? Focus on that.You do your best to concentrate on the sensation, and gradually it becomes more insistent, like a thumping, in time with your own heartbeat. Before you realize it, you find yourself in a different place altogether.
You're surrounded by coils of smooth, fleshy-looking material with light flickering along the inside. It's hot, humid, and you feel sticky. It reminds you a bit of your wife's vagina. Not that you've seen it in a while, mind you.
Around you, there is a blur of activity, but you can make out two main sources. One is an X feed, moving at such a fast pace that the information seems to meld together. The other is a virtual reality simulation of a conveyor belt, where furry characters are brought to be force-fed some kind of green slime by the clerk. You don't understand what kind of gratification he gets from this. You're not sure if you want to know.
<Good job, you're in! Try out altering the programming! Don't expect to be able to move mountains, though…What do you do?
▶ №12946796[Quote]>>12954118
>>12945965upload your r/chonkers folder to his frontal lobe
▶ №12946808[Quote]
>>>12912759
try to reverse engineer the shitty 'jeet tesla coding
▶ №12946886[Quote]
>>12945965Snoop around for anywhere that might be able to call the police
▶ №12947812[Quote]
>>12945965spam upload your memories of the confederate guy from part one skinning the cops into his neuralink
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>>12945965Attempt to sabotage the X feed
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Up
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Buo
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>>12954165This when whenever the gang finds a TV
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Up
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>>12954165youre supposed to give suggestions not write the story eslcaca
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Have the police surround the cvs
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Up
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Bump
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bumo
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Bumperald
▶ №12978801[Quote]
>>12978768It's been going since June
Old thread is here if you want to get caught up:
https://www.soyjak.st/chive/thread/149597.html▶ №12978819[Quote]
>>12978807
No geg, I'm keeping to my word about running it for years
▶ №12978850[Quote]
>>12978838
>turn on the IDS
This is coally
>Make a new thread
Planning on doing this soon but not now. I'll do it when I have the time to do a lot of panels in one day so the thread can get off to a good start
▶ №12978858[Quote]
>>12978838>is there a cobman thread archive?yep, it and its sequels are on /chive/
https://www.soyjak.st/chive/thread/89169.html▶ №12986622[Quote]
>>12945965activate rape mode
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>>12978867
fucking christ i laughed at this post enough to make my chest hurt goddammit
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Bumperald
▶ №12992694[Quote]
up though
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bumo
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upo or something
