I wrote a diary yesterday about how I feel like killing myself. I still strongly feel that way but I made it through the night, partly because of the help I got from Kossacks. I want to thank the community for that. It helps.
I think the worst part of the day for me is the morning, where I wake up rested and then 30 seconds later realize why I was so upset yesterday. This is going to be the new normal for me. Realizing in horror that Donald Trump is President and wondering how I can possibly survive it. And it’s going to be my default reaction every time I wake up.
I haven’t called the suicide hotline again yet (but I will) simply because I was too exhausted to talk about my feelings yesterday. I will probably be going back to sleep now but will check on comments when I wake up. I also will probably call the hotline again today.
Thank you to the Daily Kos community for all of the support and love you have shown me. It means a lot.
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Hey Matt, I am still here, we can make hats. It’s stupid but it isn’t sucide.
{{{Matt}}}
Don’t hesitate to reach out, please.
Please Matt Z….I've seen this community help people who feel that way. We’re here.
I had similar feelings right after the election, despondency so dark and bleak.
Just feeling why bother, we’re fucked.
Please take care of yourself.
Try, by any means, to get some sleep. Being sleepless is horrible and it distorts everything.
Just know that you are not alone...
Don't give them the satisfaction of killing yourself.
They’ll get around to doing it for you eventually.
Or at least, that’s my thinking.
I’m having to restrain myself from lashing out.
I know we don’t really know each other, but I’m glad to see you back. Hang in there, my friend. We’re going to need everybody in the days ahead.
If nothing else, then this. We are all needed. Each in our own way. Hang in there, Matt, and all others who are struggling through.
Glad you're hanging in there. One day at a time.
Dear Matt:. I don't know your circumstances but I urge you to reach out to someone near you. Friends or family or someone from work or church who you can ask to be with you in addition to using the hotline. Let someone near you know your feelings. Daily Kos folks are here for you and so are people you in other parts of your life. Let them know too. Keeping you in the light.
re
Matt Z,
I try to be very conscious of my social presence. I signed up to this site to just because I wanted to post a comment to you. You want you to know that you are not worthless. I think and believe that you have value and worth that comes from inside of you. This present situation of country does determine who and want you are. Please don’t give up hold on.
Thank you. It means a lot.
Thank you for this compassionate first comment on Daily Kos, Shertene.
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Glad you checked in. Been worrying about you. And all of us, really.
Let us know if we can help. We are here for you Matt. Take care friend.
Matt,
Been thinking about you and so glad to know you’re hanging in there. You’ve always been a reassuring ‘recc’ for some of my off-the-wall comments, always a comforting vote of confidence from someone whose opinion really matters to me.
For what it’s worth, I’ve chosen to tune out — as much as possible — the predictable prattle of most of the ‘MSM’, consumed with getting itself off the hook for its own numerous, unforgivable failures throughout this madness, and the ever-present DK “blame dispensers”, obsessed with the desperate attempt to validate their own past naïveté.
Ignore the words, “I told you so”… the last refuge of gawkers at the scene of car wrecks who imagine themselves the drivers.
… and, now, just an educated opinion: There’s nothing we can do that the uniformly toxic participants in Drumpf’s excellent adventure aren’t destined to do to themselves, and sooner than you might imagine.
Stick around, friend. I think it’s gonna be one helluva show!
Stay in touch with all of us. We’re here for you.
Matt, our thoughts are with you.
Hey Matt. I’ve just come back online to see how you are. Many thanks for your diary. I’m looking forward to reading more of them :)
Maybe the thing to do (I’m somewhat considering this myself) is to move to another country, not dominated by an oligarchy, in which people are working with each other to build a better society.
Americans will either decide to look around and see what other people are doing one day, or they won’t. You and I can do very little to determine whether they will or won’t. But perhaps what we can do is contribute to a better society somewhere else, so if Americans ever decide to look around for a better example, there will be one for them to see.
Europe and Britain and Australia are out. They are approximately as oligarchy-bound as the USA.
Canada maybe (the climate of British Columbia is nice), but I don’t think they’re going to let many Americans in.
My current leading candidate (despite the fact I’d have to learn Spanish) is Uruguay. Just read the first several paragraphs of the Wikipedia page on Uruguay, and you’ll immediately see the appeal.
I hear Belize and Costa Rica are also very nice.
I don’t know much about the politics of New Zealand, but I intend to look into it.
