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afairmaiden boosted
Public
afairmaiden

I am in a dire situation without money to survive. I am homeless, and very disabled in a bad health flare and need health care and stability asap. Without it, I cannot get a job. It is a catch-22. I am so grateful for any help and I love all of you. ;_;
gofund.me/f3a9db71

gofundme.comDonate to Help Secure Safe Housing for a Disabled Individual, organized by Ang VondraHi everyone, I feel sorry to do this but I am in a dire situation that iā€¦ Ang Vondra needs your support for Help Secure Safe Housing for a Disabled Individual
Public
afairmaiden

I am in a dire situation without money to survive. I am homeless, and very disabled in a bad health flare and need health care and stability asap. Without it, I cannot get a job. It is a catch-22. I am so grateful for any help and I love all of you. ;_;
gofund.me/f3a9db71

gofundme.comDonate to Help Secure Safe Housing for a Disabled Individual, organized by Ang VondraHi everyone, I feel sorry to do this but I am in a dire situation that iā€¦ Ang Vondra needs your support for Help Secure Safe Housing for a Disabled Individual
Continued thread
Quiet public
afairmaiden

what I think I want is the design-feel of the less messy/whispy hair like the bottom middle because I like the shape appeal of that, but with the energy/flow of how unkept he looks in the top drawings, so something merging those two..... hm...

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afairmaiden

So basically what i'm trying to convey is that the Boy design I want is somewhere amongst all of this but I haven't yet figured out the exact design. He needs to look so cute though it's unhinged for anyone that sees him, this is my vision.
I don't want to share my character design process too much because I know people get attached to concepts I might not use but also HE'S SOMEWHERE IN HERE, BIRDY WHERE ARE YOU, COME OUT. KATE NEEDS YOU IN HER VAN.

afairmaiden<p>might get to a place where i&#39;ll just have to start drawing this god damn comic and let the designs naturally settle/find themselves as I learn happy accidents and appealing shorthands the more i draw these characters šŸ˜­</p>
afairmaiden<p>Sad boy energy, his hair here has a slightly different design feel feel than the above drawings, he&#39;s in there BUT I CAN&#39;T QUITE WRAP THE DESIGN around the feeling i&#39;m trying to convey AUGH</p>
afairmaiden<p>I&#39;m trying to decide if i want his hair to be a little more or less whispy, more solid shapey or more detailed,... then something in the top left corner doesn&#39;t feel right I want a distinct shape but it doesn&#39;t feel right yet, it&#39;s like, not there yet but he&#39;s in there somewhere. SCREAMING because ive been going insane drawing him a million times trying to figure it out</p>
afairmaiden<p>GOING INSANE I&#39;M SO CLOSE WITH BIRDY&#39;S HAIR DESIGN BUT there&#39;s something I can&#39;t quite nail with it. So I keep dancing around variations in his exact shapes because I&#39;m trying to convey a specific feel, and I see his energy in it but it still doesn&#39;t quite feel like &quot;him&quot; to me. Just, almost there, not fully there. Does this make sense? lmao.<br />I&#39;m going to chew my own arm off hthis cartoon needs to look as molestable as possible or I&#39;m quitting art because that&#39;s how important my vision is.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Iā€™m so unhinged about this because my own skillset limitations aside, I KNOW this story I want to make is that good and I know it because I keep looking for one even remotely like it around me in other media and it doesnā€™t come close to existing so I am the only one who can make it exist and Iā€™m so feral about it. When will I get to just have that space again where I can just draw and enjoy myself. The first version of this comic doesnā€™t even hold a candle to what this story is to me now.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Iā€™m so sick of the universe nerfing me every time I try to follow through on any passion project of mine. Where were the days where I was able to just have living stability long enough to go feral and draw prolific amounts of ship art a few years ago actually am screaming nonstop because I canā€™t stop rattling the fucking bars of this cage called ā€œsurvival modeā€ causing a complete shutdown of being able to draw to make what needs to come out of me so bad. AUGHHGHGHHHGH</p>
afairmaiden<p>Kate and Birdyā€™s story I know for a fact is going to be so goddamn good and indulgent for anyone who likes both porny world building and taboo love stories about a woman and shota that Iā€™m actually un-fucking-hinged about the fact that I canā€™t just make it now because I have to get all my crap out of here this week to go live in my car indefinitely and Iā€™m so petrified by how fast my life is blowing up, I canā€™t even get myself to try to draw even to prove itā€™ll be worth an audience.</p>
afairmaiden<p>I am the living embodiment of both a monkeyā€™s paw and murphyā€™s law and I legitimately think I am cursed at this point because there is no other explanation for how heinously unlucky I am even when I think I get my dreams granted.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Was doodling Parkerā€™s design because I posted all my old Outer Demons art and this is a little more the direction Iā€™m flowing with him now (not finalized at all ftr). Very girly boy haha</p>
afairmaiden<p>I was gonna abandon my belongings and just sleep in my car i guess. It sucks that the cost of living is so high that any assistance I do get from kind people just goes to basic necessities but housing is so out of reach.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Please hope for me I find somewhere to live asap. With how bleak my situation is right now, I canā€™t see anything working out. ;_; <br />I have to pack all my shit this week and be out with nowhere to go or even the money to move or pay rent anywhere.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Kate having a ā€œfatter assā€ for better humping is just going to live rent free in my head now (divinely given design notes)</p>
afairmaiden<p>I had a dream last night where I was dealing with some stupid shit then Kate showed up and dragged me away and got me on the floor and got on top of me and was humping me and she said ā€œI am better than you at humpingā€ and I got offended because it made me insecure I wasnā€™t as good as her and she said, ā€œI donā€™t mean it like that,ā€ pauses, ā€œitā€™s because I have a fatter ass than you.ā€ Then she stuck her fingers in my mouth and I woke up happy to have more important knowing of her character. Lmao.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Btw thank you so so so so much to everyone who subscribed to my<br />Subscribestar, Iā€™m sorry I donā€™t update frequently like I want due to the lack of stability situation and impending homelessness (again), but I promise I am so grateful for any help and support and really do have big porny passion projects I want to see through.</p>
afairmaiden<p>I need a place to live before the end of the month. I have no viable options right now. I donā€™t know where Iā€™m going to go or what iā€™m going to do. Right now I will be living in my car within two weeks.<br />As much as I want to really be drawing art regularly again this is what iā€™m dealing with. Iā€™m so sick of surviving. Iā€™ve already been in contact with a social worker and scoping low income housing etc. thereā€™s nothing</p>
afairmaiden<p>UGH so excited to drop the synposis for The Creator&#39;s Trinket so people can comprehend a little clearer what kind of story it&#39;s going to be, but I wanna get some badass art together to share with it first. I&#39;m just excited about this story so I&#39;m saying this into the void.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Another fun fact: I&#39;ve always been really heavy into very bizarre, surreal world-building. When I made the first draft of The Creator&#39;s Trinket (Road Bump), I deliberately used an Earth setting (with the intent to slowly lift out of it) because I already had several large world building stories and wanted to just focus purely on the characters as a practice run for larger projects. But the lore kept kicking my door down and telling me to just make their story the way it was intended.</p>
afairmaiden<p>All my stories are getting the biggest lore and character world building upgrades. Everything I created for my original projects up to this point felt like I was making something trying to communicate my feelings from themes referenced from pre-existing media around me. I&#39;ve left that kind of creating behind. Everything i want to make now is so purely indulgent that it&#39;ll really be from my own inner love. <br />Also every single story of mine will be super porny, as it should be. :3</p>
afairmaiden<p>And there we go! The story is getting a massive rework because I have a MUCH clearer idea of what I want to do with it, these concepts feel so messy and half-baked to me in comparison. The Creator&#39;s Trinket with Kate and Birdy is first but I wanted to share concepts of my narrative work from a few years ago because truly, storytelling is my passion.</p>
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afairmaiden<p>nathan&#39;s nightmares</p>
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afairmaiden<p>i never settled on Mae&#39;s larger form and these were very digimon/pokemon inspired which is something I&#39;m moving away from in how I want to actually communicate the story now haha.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Gonna dump all the concept art, that&#39;s how much this story is getting an EVENTUAL upgrade, none of it is really spoilery anymore.</p>
afairmaiden<p>My storytelling sensibilities are so different now so this draft is basically all been trashed but, here&#39;s what the original version was trying to feel itself out as if anyone was curious about my process: <a href="https://drive.google.com/file/d/15BT5JW40gBRWU4FTQ-9kN2fsnMcuPq1e/view?usp=sharing" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no"><span class="invisible">https://</span><span class="ellipsis">drive.google.com/file/d/15BT5J</span><span class="invisible">W40gBRWU4FTQ-9kN2fsnMcuPq1e/view?usp=sharing</span></a><br />The above scene is taken from this.</p>
afairmaiden<p>Here&#39;s two parts to an unfinished animatic that was going to be candycola that I made a few years ago:<br />part 1: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7lbSDu4K4D0" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no"><span class="invisible">https://www.</span><span class="ellipsis">youtube.com/watch?v=7lbSDu4K4D</span><span class="invisible">0</span></a><br />part 2: <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ik9uGO6agpA" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no"><span class="invisible">https://www.</span><span class="ellipsis">youtube.com/watch?v=ik9uGO6agp</span><span class="invisible">A</span></a><br />(There was a chase scene where Kit and Pez get captured by whoever was chasing Pez between these two parts I never roughed out)</p>
afairmaiden<p>Reposted some unfinished animatics from old projects of mine on yt. I know they are lacking context but,,<br />Here&#39;s one for Outer Demons where Parker and Emely meet: <br /><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdnIxNo_980" target="_blank" rel="nofollow noopener noreferrer" translate="no"><span class="invisible">https://www.</span><span class="ellipsis">youtube.com/watch?v=OdnIxNo_98</span><span class="invisible">0</span></a></p>
afairmaiden<p>I made Kateā€™s personality like 10000% more feral and Birdy so much more mountable so Iā€™m excited for that šŸ¤¤ <br />Wait until you see what they do when they make out</p>
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