The Surprise

"I've looked after my younger sister for seven years, since our parents died. She's kinky, like me, but she's vulnerable. It's cute that you pandered to her love of rough role play. But eight men have broken her heart. Five have been utter bastards, scarring her as they did. So I scarred them. It's how I found out that I'm good at inflicting pain. If you look after her, we'll play nice." She hummed. "Well, in this dungeon, we'll play with safe words, and so everyone enjoys themselves. If you lay a finger on her, or you hurt her, you'll be in my black book. And I can dish out pain, Doctor Joe. I can make you have nightmares."

I gulped; her face was two inches away from me and I could smell the sweet fruitiness of the Speyside spirit on her breath. "I ... know."

"You don't." She smiled. "Not really. This is child's play. But I like you. For now. It'd be a shame for you to need a testicle retrieval operation. Or for you to fall naked into a pit of nettles. Or Tabasco in the condom. They properly scream when I crack open the Tabasco. And it keeps burning for hours afterwards. But we have shared interests, and while you keep Khristyna happy, you're safe."

She reached across and unfastened my biceps, wrists, neck, and ankles from the interrogation chair. The professional dominatrix poured a glass of the £500-a-bottle Scotch and held it to me. "Better than piss."

My hands shook as I took it. "Thanks," I muttered.

"Tell me. How much did Khristyna arrange with you about tonight?"

I sighed. "Last week, we got drunk, and Khristyna and I talked about sex. I told her what my fantasies were and what my ex-wife and I did. And she said she liked BDSM role play. And that she wanted to discipline a date rapist. Which is dark, but I agreed. It's a weird first date, but exciting and fun. I asked my shady friend how easy it is to get ketamine or Rohypnol and he offered to sell it to me for twenty-five quid, which is a scary response, and not what I expected. So I just nicked a packet of sugar from the canteen." She smiled, sipping her luxury Scotch. "Khristyna texted me last night. Said that everything I'd discussed was up for play, but my safe word was red melons, and to wear my cheapest, crappiest clothes."

Silvija chuckled. "Where do you work?"

"Manchester. I'm a paediatric oncologist."

She sighed. "Child cancer doctor?"

"Yeah."

"And so you spend your days telling children they're going to die."

I sipped the whisky. "A bit. I tell more that they're cured. I'm a good doctor. But I have bad days shattering hope."

"I get it," she said. "It's stressful. BDSM is an escape, yes?"

"Yes. Yes, it is." She stared at me. "And anal sex feels great, and I like to drift away to impact play. And the scenario Khristyna created was imaginative."

The heels of my new girlfriend tapped on the floor as she entered the dungeon. "It was good. I'm thinking of apprehending a shoplifter at the weekend. Can we have your playroom on Sunday, Silvija?"

"No," her sister snapped.

"Please."

"This place is expensive. I have paying clients to fund this." Khristyna pouted. "You'll just have to spank him in your bedsit."

"Or my three-bedroom house," I said. "Perhaps there might be a burglar that needs teaching a lesson on Sunday while a roast dinner cooks in the oven? Fancy being a robber, Miss Khristyna?"

"Me?" she squealed. "You said you were a bottom."

"I said I was normally a bottom. And you said you were a switch. My buttocks need to heal after what you and your sister expertly did to them. If you want role play at the weekend, you are being the errant protagonist." She scowled. "You'll get a meal out of it? How many burglars get fed? And we'll agree red lines and safe words, of course."

She sighed. "OK. Not too rough. Condoms. No deep throating. No breaking the skin. No scat, blood, or vomit. Safe word of dragon. And I can't say this enough, absolutely no cabbage with dinner."

"Is that it? That's a deal. Now, any chance of some clothes? I can't go home naked, can I?"

The two sisters looked at each other and laughed with wide grins. I had the realisation that my "punishment" as a potential date rapist had one more twist.