Source: reddit.com
I thoroughly disapprove of duels. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet place and kill him.
Mark Twain
[working as a 911 operator]
Cullen: 911, what's your emergency?
Cullen: What do you mean you're being murdered?
Cullen: That's illegal, people can't do that.
Silverfish are so brave for going down the bathtub drain. I would be scared as fuck in there. I suppose when you have as many legs as they do things like that aren’t as frightening. #Perspective.
hey man. nice regional dialect. mind if i apply some baseless assumptions about your personhood to it? i was also gonna prescribe morality to it as well. if that’s cool with you
Gothamites: Lol. No way can Bruce Wayne raise a child. He is an incompetent playboy.
Bruce Wayne: *raises Dick to become an incredible good-hearted intelligent young man*
Gothamites: Wtf