FHM Singapore - September 2015

SEPTEMBER 2015

$6.00

SINGAPORE’S BEST-SELLING MEN’

S

M G ZINE

WHY “BAD GUYS”HAVE MORE FUNMAKE A THRILLERLIKE M NIGHT

SHYAMA A

J a e L i e w

t h e H e a r t l a n d

H o n e y !

•

Over 240 events in 20+ countries

•

Over 1 million participants worldwide

•

Suitable for all ages

•

6+km, 22+ obstacles

•

Top 3 fastest male and female Elite racerswin cash prizes and trophies.

•

Spartan Junior Race (ages 4 to 13)

The inaugural Reebok Spartan Race Singapore Sprint will take place on Sunday, 15 November 2015. Registration is now open via its official website www.spartanrace.sg. MediaCorp is the official media partner for Reebok Spartan Race Singapore Sprint 2015.

For more information on Reebok Spartan Race, as well as details on Spartan Junior Race, visit

www.spartanrace.sg

THE WORLD’S LEADING

OBSTACLE RACE IS FINALLY COMING TO SINGAPORE

15 NOVEMBER 2015

For competitive male and female heats, each person will be charged an additional $20 on top of existing registration price. Upon finishing the race, every participant receives a headband, racer's T-shirt and medal.

Normal Registration

(till 15 Nov)

contact info@sg.spartan.com

TEAM OF 40+TEAM OF 3 󰀭 10

$98 ++

INDIVIDUAL

$108 ++

Race Pricing Categories

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09/15

ACCESS

04 TALENT

Say “hello” to one of the hottest bodies — and faces — of this year’s Sea Games.

10 COUNTDOWN

Nine amazing things girls do but no man should attempt. No 7: Twerk.

11 TV

MMA legend Tito Ortiz gets back in the game for a shot at Bellator glory.

12 HOW I DID IT…

An extreme-cold endurance athelete explains how he stays cool in sub-zero temperatures.

Hottest girl in the neighbourhood p28 Raging bull p72 My Michelle p46 Good to be bad p38 Attack of the drones p26 Up for a fight p11She’s athletic! p04

00109/15

GEAR

14 OPENER

Tips on how to pull off the ’90s old-school look.

16 GROOMING

Look your best for your next holiday — in just two weeks.

17 ADVICE

Should you invest in a $300 swimming trunks? We give you the lowdown.

18 OPINION

What the ladies think.

19 STYLE NEWS

The fashion bits.

FEATURES

28 COVER GIRL

Remember the name “Jae Liew” because she’s here to stay.

38 BADDIES

No one likes them and they don’t care — the men who make their living doing stuff that makes them unpopular.

46 SECOND TO NONE

FHM

Models first runner-up Michelle Low gets a “10/10” score card for her solo shoot.

56 THE HORROR MASTER

Exclusive interview with the king of suspense — M Night Shyamalan.

Spoiler Alert!

LOOK AWAY NOW IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT’S IN THE ISSUE.

or

T

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SRESSSS

W“GSA O FUNAA THRI ERG SHYAMA AN

Je Lew

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Singapore FHM is published by MediaCorp Pte Ltd, Caldecott Broadcast Centre, Andrew Road, Singapore 299939, under licence from Bauer Consumer Media Ltd. MCI (P) 045/11/2014. Copyright © is held by the publisher. All rights reserved. Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is prohibited. Distributed by MediaCorp Pte Ltd. Printed by timesprinters, www.timesprinters.com. Prepress managed by timesprinters. MediaCorp Pte Ltd also publishes I-WEEKLY, 8 DAYS, STYLE:, STYLE:MEN, STYLE: WEDDINGS, HIGH, TIMEPIECES, MANJA, IHEALTH, HEALTH WEEKLY, BABYCARE BOOK, and MOTHER & BABY under licence from Bauer Consumer Media Ltd, ELLE SINGAPORE under licence from Hachette Filipacchi Presse S.A.

info@fhm.com.sg facebook/FHMSingapore @FHMSingapore @FHMSingapore

EVERYTHING A MAN NEEDS. AND MORE.

00209/15

Managing Director

Jessie Sng

VP, Business Development & Operations

Lesley Ngai

Editorial

Editor

Dennis Yin

Writer

Janine Lee

Assistant Editorial Admin Manager

Farlinzah Mahmood

Art Desk

Art Director

Alvin Leow

Senior Designer

Pyron Tan

Photography

Chief Photographer

Aik Chen

Executive Photographer

Ealbert Ho

Senior Photographer

Kelvin Chia

Photographers

Hong Chee Yan, Mark Lee

Contributors

Cheryl Tay, Eleganz, FHM UK, Timothy Wee

Advertising

Chief Commercial Officer

Jack Lim

Vice President

Stephanie Tay

Assistant Vice President

Derek Tan, Sharie Lim

Senior Account Directors

Priscilla Lim, Sarin Wee, Xylia Lim

Account Director

Celine Sim

Senior Account Manager

Rebecca Khoo, Tan Mui Kian, Teresa Tan

Account Managers

Jamie Low, Katherine Sim, Mandee Tan

Associate Account Managers

Christine Lin, Tsai Wen Jun,Rebecca Koh, Wee Ping

Snr Admin Executive

Tristan Phua

Snr Admin Executive

Crystal Chee

Admin Executive

Elaina Poh

Ad Admin

Vice President

Angela Chia

Senior Manager

Anne Hong

Assistant Manager

Brenda Chong

Executive

Eileen Khng

Brands & Partnerships

Marketing Executive

Chong Lilin

Events

Senior Promotions Executives

Anson Lim, Wilson Tan

Circulation

Senior Managers

Claire Sze, Elizabeth Low

Production

Manager

Garis Chua

For enquiries:

EditorialE-mail:

info@fhm.com.sg; Fax: 6254-5116

MediaCorp Advertising Enquiry:

6333-9888 or MAE@mediacorp.com.sg

Subscription:

6357-5001 or mpbsubhelp@mediacorp.com.sg

FHM INTERNATIONAL NETWORK

International Publisher

Gareth Cherriman

International Content Executive

Kam Sekhon

EDITOR’S LETTER...

THIS IS IT.

The magazine you’re now holding in your hands is the last issue of

Singapore FHM

. It’s been one hell of a ride for everyone involved. On behalf of the team, a super-big “thank you” to all the lovely girls who have graced our pages, as well as to you, our loyal readers, for making us a part of your toilet reading habit. As the saying goes, “All good things must come to an end eventually, but the next experience awaits”. Look out for our new men’s brand to be launched soon (details on our

Singapore FHM

Facebook page).

Dennis YinEditor

JAE LIEW WEARS

TEDDY BEAR PRINT SCARF AND HIGH WAIST SHORTS, BOTH BY MOSCHINO. METALLIC CUFF, FROM UNDERCOVER X AMBUSH AT SALON BY SURRENDER. ART DIRECTION ALVIN LEOW & PYRON TAN. PHOTOGRAPHY AIK CHEN. STYLING RANDOPLH TAN. HAIR: MELISSA YEO. MAKEUP: JIMMY YAP/KENARIS SALON.

#203

GET IN TOUCH!

CMYCMMYCYCMYK

or

BUGIS

07 04

C H E E S Y F R I E S

WICKED BRO WNIE

or

IT’S GREAT TO BE A MAN

Filipino volleyball superstar Rachel Anne Daquis has crossed into our home turf and she’s going for the win!

Words

Pong Castillo

Photography

Jake Verzosa

Styling

Badj Genato for badjswimwear.com

PLA

THEGAME

Talent

or

00509/15

MAKEUP: AMANDA PADILLA/ AT EAST,JED ROOT. HAIR: RHOY CERVANTES FOR L’OREAL PROFESSIONNEL.

or

“VOLLEYBALL IS MY FIRST LOVE. BUT IF GIVEN THE CHANCE, I WANT TO BE PART OF A REALITY SHOW.”

or

Digital editions are available on both iOS and Android. To download, search for MEDIACORP or go to:

Magzter at http://www.magzter.com/publishers/MediaCorp

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SHYAMA AN

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WHY“GS”HAMO

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ENJOY YOUR FAVOURITE MAGAZINES

ON THE MOVE!

or

“YOU WON’T SEE ME DANCE IN PUBLIC. FOR ONE, I DON’T PARTY.”

008 09/15

or

or

08

Flirt your way out of a tricky situation

The flutter of your girlfriend’s eyelids can guarantee drinks after last orders and leniency from even the most Stalin-like of traffic wardens. Yet when you try to flirt your way through the barriers after “losing” your train ticket, you’re carted off by the SMRT personnel quicker than you can say “restraining order”.Go figure!

07

Twerk

Only 50 per cent of the population can get away with grinding their bottoms to the delight of others. The other half just manage to look like they’re trying to shift a bad case of worms. Guess which one you’d be?

06

Cut your own hair

You’ll either end up stabbing yourself in the head or looking like the fella from

The Hills Have Eyes

if you try to give your own barnet a trim. Ladies manage such tasks without professionals, YouTube tutorials or trips to A&E.

05

Send NSFW pics of yourself

As the more beautiful sex, women were always going to have a handle on the whol selfie thing. Notice how when a celeb lady’s selfies leak, they always look incredible. Yet when

9 AMAZING THINGS GIRLS DO BUT NO MAN SHOULD ATTEMPT

W O R D S : S I M O N C U N N I N G H A M

WATCH

MAGIC MIKE

Yes, it’s quite adorable how excited your girlfriend and all her mates get about Channing Tatum’s bum cheeks, but don’t ever attempt to get in on the fun yourself. You’ll just spend the rest of the evening staring at your own naked body in the mirror as you weep and eat Nutella out of the jar.

it’s a bloke, it’s normally some pot-bellied politician with his knob limply dangling like an old party balloon.

04

Get naked in front of your mates

Whereas girls can happily parade around their pals in the buff (“Jess, your abs are amazing — is it the Zumba classes?”), there’s no panic like the horror men experience when the towel slips in the changing rooms.

03

Wear sexy undies

Girls have got the whole sexy underwear thing covered, so you can retire your “lucky” pulling pants and chuck away those novelty “May contain nuts” boxers while you’re at it. Though you can keep the Homer Simpson tie: A vital weapon in any job hunter’s armoury.

02

Wax anything

Not only is it more painful than a million vinegar-tainted paper cuts, but just pause for a moment to think how odd you’d look without hairy legs. Yes, give your bush the odd trim, but stop short of looking like a blow-up sex doll or, even worse, a professional cyclist.

01

Wear a flasher’s mac

When women do the whole “wearing nothing but undies under a coat” thing, it’s seen as naughty and kinky. Yet when a fella does it and takes a shortcut through the bushes in the park, the police is called. It’s political correctness gone mad!

FHM

YOU COOK LIKE A LIMP SAUSAGE!

010 09/15

ACCESS

or

W O R D S : D E N N I S Y I N , P H O T O S : K I X A N D K I X H D

What do you think of your opponent, Liam McGeary, who holds excellent fighting records?

McGeary definitely has not fought someone like me. I’ve fought with the best. I’m a different animal and a different type of fighter… I watched his last fight and a smaller-sized Emanuel Newton manhandled him. I’m a lot bigger than Newton; wait till I grab a hold of him… It’ll be an exciting fight because he’ll be getting a beating for five five-minute rounds. Either the referee rips me off of him or he’ll be knocked out.

Any ritual before a huge fight?

I get very emotional before a fight. As I walk out, there are always tears in my eyes. Not tears of pain or fear but

MMA legend Tito Ortiz on challenging Bellator’s reigning light heavyweight kingpin, Liam McGeary, in a mega event that has Bellator fighters and Glory kickboxers fighting in the same arena on the same night.

that of anxiety and emotion. Every step I take, I become more confident and, at the end, I feel invincible. Just looking at my opponent, I feel like he’s trying to disrespect me by beating me and my goal is to beat him. That’s when I throw up and cry. When I finally step into the cage and have no more tears, everything becomes automatic — my body goes into cruise control and fights.

What are some things people don’t know about you?

I’m an open book. People only know the bad-boy image from my UFC days. But I’m kind, unselfish and always giving. I do a lot of charity. I have the great opportunity to be a great athlete and I work hard for it. I also don’t step on people to get ahead… But I don’t want to be a role model because I don’t want people to model after my life. I’ve made mistakes. More than anything, I want to inspire people to be better in their lives and treat others better.

Your toughest UFC moment?

My last fight against Stephan Bonnar. I couldn't see with my left eye but I fought anyway because he had said a lot of personal things that were very disrespectful. We are martial artists; we should respect each other and not talk about family stuff. So I had to fight him. That was the toughest thing, not pulling out of the fight because I only had one eye. But I fought anyway with heart and determination, without technique.

How do you stay in tip-top condition at 40?

Eat good. I eat a lot of sushi. Eat clean — no fried food, soda or ice cream. Also, work out! Prior to a fight, I work out every single day, except Sunday, for 6 to 7 hours daily. I also do a lot of fishing; it’s hard work on the waters. It has got a lot to do with the mind, too. I believe in myself.

You were once the highest-paid fighter in the UFC. Any tips on how to become a good fighter?

Make good business decisions and always have trustworthy people around you. Never say “no” to interviews and autographs; build your fan base. Always think outside the box; be different. Work hard and never stop dreaming. This is a business, not a competition. If you’re a fighter, you have to be professional. Think about what you can do 10 years from now at the beginning of your career, but don’t count your chickens before they hatch.

FHM

Kix (StarHub Cable TV Ch518 and Singtel TV Ch309) will broadcast

Bellator “Dynamite”

“live” on Sun, 20 Sep, noon; repeat on Mon, 21 Sep, 10pm.

BELLATOR “DYNAMITE”

LIAM MCGEARY:THE CHAMP IS HERE!

01109/15

ACCESS

or

09/15012

HOW I DID IT…

I first learned I could withstand the cold when I was 17, in a frozen lake in Holland.

That brought about real power within me, that self-control I had awakened by going into the cold. From there on, I was able to swim in freezing water and enjoy it.

When I was a kid, sometimes my identical twin brother and I would fight almost to the death.

There would be blood, tension and fury between us, and then five minutes later, we’d be best of friends.

Still, I once pretended to be him and began a relationship with his girlfriend.

I was 17 and he had to go away to be a sailor. At first she thought I was him and we dated for two years. Later my brother talked to me about it. He was angry, but he soon forgave me.

I’m 56 and I can do the splits like a ballet dancer.

I can do 100 push-ups without breathing, but I only need one square metre for that at home. You won’t find me in a gym.

I could make up any challenge.

When you’ve done it once, you get a sense you can do just about anything with your body.

I have 26 world records.

They range from the longest ice bath (one hour, 13 minutes and 48 seconds) to a marathon around the Arctic Circle in a pair of shorts. Climbing Everest in shorts was easy. I found myself at 6,000 metres in a blizzard and I had to find my own way. I was alone for hours and hours, but it was probably my greatest experience.

Mind power is like electricity.

I can channel it towards different places in my body.

I am able to intervene in my red cell generation.

It took training and self-discipline through meditation, but now I can make my body absorb more oxygen and heal faster.

The circulation in my left leg once stopped.

I was doing a half-marathon and

Wim “the iceman” Hof, 56, extreme-cold endurance athlete and record breaker.

with 3km to go, it began to feel like a wooden stick. I still finished the race. A dermatologist later told me there was irreparable damage done, but within a month I’d healed myself.

I lost my wife in 1995.

That was the worst moment of my life. She was the mother of my children, my dearly beloved. You think you’re gonna spend the rest of your life together. It tears you apart. The worst moment is not one moment; it’s all the years afterwards.

I raised four children by myself.

I had to cook every day for many years. My speciality? Macaroni cheese. I’m more of a child than my kids. It’s always me with the ball, saying, “Kids, will you come outside to play?” If they stay at home, I’ll play against a wall.

Growing older is becoming balder

— but wiser. Ageing doesn’t bother me.

The weirdest place my job has taken me is under the ice

. It is a really strange place. But by learning the capability to stay under, I experience a spiritual depth.

I love a hot shower, yes sir.

If you experience a really hot shower after being in the cold, you appreciate it so much more. It makes life worth living.

Criticism polishes the diamond of knowledge.

Cynicism and mockery has passed into my journey before. I just wash it away. I’ve never lied about anything I’ve achieved.

Money is invented by society.

It’s a psychological thing. But it doesn’t matter — it’s just something to compensate your feelings, and I’ve got my feelings right on.

If I wasn’t doing this, I’d be a gardener.

Plants, flowers and trees — I’m fascinated with nature. It’s life. Everybody who visits me loves my garden. They call it a little paradise.

I do not fear death.

But I do fear not to live.

FHM

For more on The Iceman, visit icemanwimhof.com

or

01309/15

THIS DOG HAS SEEN SOME WEIRD 󲀔 AND COLD 󲀔 SHIT

W O R D S : S A M R O W E , P H O T O :

F H M

U K

or

CAN I PULL OFF ’90S OLD SCHOOL?

Scared of dressing like your 12-year-old self? Crack this season’s top trend in style…

THE DILEMMAS OF MAN

HAT, BY STÜSSY FROM URBANINDUSTRY.CO.UK. JUMPER, BY FILA FROM SCOTTSMENSWEAR.COM. POLO, BY ELLESSE FROM SCOTTSMENSWEAR.COM. JEANS, BY CALVIN KLEIN FROM URBANOUTFITTERS.COM. TRAINERS, BY ADIDAS FROM FOOTASYLUM.COM

OLD SHIT JUST GOT ‘VINTAGE’

Next time you pay your famil

y

visit, get into the loft, rumma

ge

through your old threads and pull out your Ellesse hoodie, Kappa popper trackies and Adidas shell toes and ask why you ever put them away.

OTT LOGOS ARE COOL

Think of those in-your-face logo belts and caps that fill the shops when you’re on your summer hols abroad and just add a cool British edge. Oh, and the bigger the logo, the better.

BAGGY JEANS ARE YOUR FRIENDS

When it comes to denim, it’s all about bootcut fit. That’s right, simply add an extra inch or two to the width of your favourite slim-fit selvedge pair.

IT’S ALL ABOUT THE BRANDS

Many heavyweight labels of the ’90s have made a triumphant comeback in 2015. The likes of Fila, Ellesse, Champion and Umbro are all there, with cool updates of their classic styles.

EASE YOURSELF IN

If reppin’ the old school from head to toe is a bit daunting, just add one retro piece to your everyday attire. Swap your skinnies for some Marky Mark-style looser-fitting legwear, your polo shirt for an Ellesse one, or your track top for a towelling Fila version.

GEAR

or

W O R D S : S A M R O W E

Yup, your new style heroes are PJ and Duncan, Tupac and a 19-year-old Becks. It’s time to invest in 2015’s version of the 1990s’ most-worn items and earn some serious street cred

LET’S GET READY TO RHUMBLE

Luckily, we don’t have to bowl around in jeans with legs so wide a small man could fit inside, as Urban Outfitters has this slimmer cut.A favourite of rapper Eminem, they came with a colour palette that could match everything and make any cool outfit complete.Before Angels – and weirdness – Robbie Williams actually looked pretty cool, layering and accessorising like a king.With smaller logos for 2015, Fila has jumped back on to the scene with some styles that you’ll find hard not to wear for five days on the trot. They got it right the first time, so why fix it? Great for long, sunny days or festival dance tents by night.

Kangol fromselfridges.com

KANGOL HAT

Champion fromsize.co.uk

CHAMPION HOODIE

Nike from jdsports.co.uk

NIKE AIR MAX 95

The summery blue stripes combined with the black base colour make for a great all-round pair of kicks. Best worn with your denim shorts.If anyone wore the hell out of the iconic Kangol hat, it was LL Cool J. We think he pretty much wore one for all 3,652 days of the ’90s. Champion has a logoed sweat or tee in virtually every colour. So whatever shade tickles your fancy, they’ve got it. Apparently, wearing your jeans lower than your boxers was acceptable – oh, and without a top and just a tiny cap to finish off your outstanding look.

Calvin Klein from urbanoutfitters.com

CK JEANS

Umbro fromsize.co.uk

UMBRO SWEATER

Fila fromscottsmenswear.com

FILA TEE

Pre Posh, tattoos and multi-million-pound deals, a certain young, floppy-haired teen was never seen out of his Umbro England kit. The late, great Alexander McQueen had a circuit of impressive friends, a book of legendary designs and a good old collection of Fila garms.Umbro has reinvented and released its pro-training range – and it’s guaranteed to look top-notch with your selvedge jeans.

or

P H O T O G R A P H Y : M A R C O V I T T U R . M O D E L : M A X M C C O R M I C K A T F I R S T M O D E L S

Put in the prep to make sure you look up to scratch on the beach.

THE HOLIDAY COUNTDOWN

2 WEEKS

Neck a load of vitamins. Vit B helps ward off mosquitoes and vitamin C prevents heat rash.Whiten your smile with a toothpaste such as Darlie Expert White.Start exfoliating now and by the time you’re in the sun, there won’t be a rough patch in sight. Tone up outside the gym with a serum like Nip + Man.

ON THE DAY

Have a shave with a Wilkinson Sword Hydro 5 Groomer. Brush, floss and mouthwash. You won’t blag free miniature boozes with honking breath. From departure lounge to landing, you’ll be chugging the beers. Hit the H2O beforeyou go.

1 WEEK

Seeing the barber seven days before you depart leaves time for you to get used to the new do. Moisturise everything so the sun doesn’t suck all the water from your body.Late nights at work to make up for time off mean you get big old eye bags. Tend to your peepers with an eye roller like Bulldog’s.

2 DAYS

Whack a facemask on for supple skin. If you’re so pale Edward Cullen feels sorry for you, a subtle fake tan will give you a head start at the pool.Get a back, sack and crack wax. Don’t leave it any later or you’ll be red and bumpy when it’s time to strip off.

GROOMING

01609/15

GEAR

or

What are you getting when you cough up $340 for a pair of designer trunks? Ideally, the reassurance that they won’t turn see-through after your first running bomb, and that your nuts won’t drop out of a leg hole as you strut down the shore with a sexy surfer girl. But whether you’re going full beached whale next to the pool, or you’re on the sand with only your swimmers and rippling muscles on show, would a beach holiday hottie really be able to tell the difference between a pair that costs less than $40, and a pair that would make your bank manager wince?We asked the ladies to try and tell the difference between a $35 pair and an identical designer pair worth 10 times that amount, and to establishif taking the plunge into your wallet is worth it…

FHM

SHOULD I DROP $340ON SWIMMING TRUNKS?

Our blind test decides if pricey swimmers are worth splashing out on…

EXHIBIT A

Vilebrequin at mrporter.com

“The material doesn’t feel that thick. I’d pay around $25.”

Belle, 28

“I recognise the brand. $300?”

Shia, 26

“They’re just red. Nothing special.”

Olivia, 22

“I really like these! I’d get them for my boyfriend if they were about $135.”

Alicia, 32EXHIBIT B

From

topman.com

“I’d pay $40. I can’t see any difference between the two apart from the logo.”

Jenny, 25

“I’d rather see these on a guy. They’ve got a richer colour. $130?”

Kate, 18

“I’d buy these. They look and feel nicer. They’d do the job, but I think they’re more expensive.”

Queenie, 19

6 6 %

L ADIE S GUE S SED THE SE WERE MORE E XPEN SI VE.

3 3 %

L AD I E S G U E S S E D T H E S E W E R E M O R E E X P E N S I V E

01709/15

ADVICE

P H O T O G R A P H Y : D A N M A T T H E W S

or

GEAR

I N T E R V I E W S & P H O T O G R A P H Y : H I D H I R B A D A R U D D I N ; P H O T O : T P G I M A G E S / C L I C K P H O T O

INTERNATIONAL STAR, JUSTIN BIEBER

“The long length puts emphasis on the shoulders and, personally, I think it looks good. Keep the choice of colours and cuts simple so it looks classic and manlier.”

Weishi, 20

“It looks simple but not too casual. An average-looking but loose and baggy shirt shows good fashion sense. It’s a nice and fashionable new look.”

Janelle, 20

“Fashion is always evolving, so if a guy can pull the entire trend off and look great in it, then I don’t see why not?”

Roxanne, 23

“Although it seems very popular now, it makes the upper torso look longer, which makes the wearer appear shorter. People want to appear taller, not the opposite.I don’t think this trend will last.”

Alexis, 23

“It’s trendy and stylish, but it may not work on a short guy. It’s not appealing for the body and makes them look badly proportioned.”

Sheaujiun, 23

“It depends on the person wearing it. In my opinion, it only suits lean guys. However, I still think it’s very stylish and pushes the limits of men’s everyday fashion.”

See Min, 20

“From a fashion student’s point of view, I like it! It’s a very unique trend. However, not everyone out there is able to pull this look off.”

Novell, 21

“I like this trend; just about anything can look good as long as it’s paired properly. If itlooks proportionate on the person, it can definitely be pulled off.”

Rose, 18

From fashion models on the runway to pop stars like Kanye West and A$AP Rocky, men have been rocking the longer-than-standard-length tee. But does this lengthy trend appeal to the opposite sex?

FHM

finds out what the ladies think.

HER OPINION

09/15018

HOW DOES MY LONGLINE T󰀭SHIRT LOOK?

(SHE’LL LET YOU KNOW)

U N F LA T T E R I N G

T H U M B S U P N OT F OR E V E R Y O N E

S T Y L I S H

W H Y N O T

F A S H I O N A B L E

FOR TALL GUYS

CLASSIC

or

COLLAR

UP!

BEST FOR

POSING

RUNAWAY

SUCCESS

01909/15

GET IT

W O R D S : A A K A S H R A M A

BEST STYLE GEAR FOR THE MONTH

Cut down on the pub crawls and swipe your card for these fashionable wear instead…

BACK TO SCHOOL

Doesn’t matter if you’re a jock or a scholar, the Jack Wills Autumn 2015 line has just the thing for you. With the combination of traditional scholastic classics and sports-inspired pieces, you’ll find yourself donning old favourites with a twist. The collection encapsulates timelessness, technique and the boldness of autumn at its very essence.

FROM JACK WILLS, RAFFLES CITY.

LET IT GO

Let it go with Rabeanco’s Fall Winter 2015 collection, Frozen Frames. The round-up features leather that softens over time while retaining its natural organic look, along with increased durability and an aesthetic of futurism. Whether you’re in the market for a briefcase, backpack or tote, these bags ensure a perfectly coordinated wardrobe for any season.

FROM RABEANCO STORES.

COLOUR US HYPED

We’ve always liked Converse sneakers but its third collab with Hancock Vulcanised Articles takes things to the next level. The limited-edition Jack Purcells feature a vulcanised, water-repellent canvas upper with a cured rubber overlay, interlaced with bright pops of colour — showcasing a seasoned partnership that’s rooted in modern design and expert craftsmanship.

$229.90, FROM SURRENDER.

PUMA X STAMPD

If you’d like to chalk up some street cred, the first collaboration between Puma and avant garde LA streetwear label Stampd is the place to start. Street fashion is represented brilliantly in The Stampd Athletics collection consisting of pieces iconic to Puma’s heritage. Sport fabric draws a line between sports and street wear, allowing the two styles to coexist in harmony. Pull on their tees and joggers in staple colours like black, white and grey and become the king of the street.

FROM LIMITED EDT AND LEFTFOOT.

GAME, SET, MATCH

If you’re as big a tennis junkie as we are, the iconic K-Swiss Si-18 is the shoe for you. The shoe was introduced over two decades ago and it ’s now back with the exact craftsmanship as before, but with a fresh update. This re-release of the legendary tennis shoe sees an original colourway with the flag colours on the heel and tongue representing each of the four host countries of the Grand Slam tournaments.

$209, FROM SELECTED WORLD OF SPORTS OUTLETS.

REV YOUR ENGINES

Let’s be honest, we all have a secret desire to be one of those rugged-looking types — the guys with full beards and motorcycles, and maybe even a pet bear. With Timberland’s Fall/Winter Moto collection, you’re one step closer to achieving that look. The collection combines motorcycle culture and leather with waxed, resin, oiled and graphite finishes for an effortlessly rugged look that’s also surprisingly refined. Suit up for your next adventure already.

FROM TIMBERLAND STORES.

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WHICH FLYING MACHINE WILL WIN THE GAME OF DRONES?

With the craze for drones taking off,

FHM

took to the park to test out the most popular models.

HARDWARE

09/15026

SYMA X5C󰀭1

$91

cheapdrone.co.uk

Lowdown

Weighing just 108g, the X5C-1 packs five minutes of flight time when videoing and can travel 50m. Essential living-room fun.

PARROT BEBOP

$925,

parrot.com

Lowdown

A mid-range piece, the Bebop weighs in at 400g. With a built-in fish-eye camera and the ability to generate its own wi-fi hotspot, it has “Instagram king” written all over it.

Looks

Like it came free with a Christmas cracker. But we couldn’t find a joke in the box – just a lengthy instruction manual.

Handling

Your mum could fly this, but do you really want another dispute with your next-door neighbours?

Overall: 2/5Looks

Like you could buy it in a beach shop in Skegness, along with a rude novelty keyring.

Handling

Controlled via your smartphone or tablet, it’s very touch sensitive. Without GPS to keep it steady, a gust of wind could ruin it all.

Overall: 3/5

W O R D S : T O M W A R D . P H O T O G R A P H Y : G I A N A N D R E A T R A I N A

GEAR

or

02709/15

DJI PHANTOM 3 QUADCOPTER

$2,492

firstperson view.co.uk

Lowdown

The iPhone of drones, the Phantom has slowly been taking over the world. Legally, you have to fly it within your line of sight but, if you’re feeling rebellious, it can reach

DJI INSPIRE 1

T600$5,120

firstperson view.co.uk

Lowdown

A heavy-duty piece of machinery, the T600 is (possibly) inspired by The Terminator and is just as durable. The professional choice.

Looks

Like a soldier droid’s head from those awful Star heights of 2km, sailing high above the clouds.

Looks

Smooth and clean cut. A drone you could happily take home to meet your parents.

Handling

A fast, nippy number that requires some back and forth on the controls. A bit like taming a wild horse.

Overall: 5/5

Wars prequels. A sci-fi full house.

Handling

Comes with two controllers: One for the drone, one for the camera. For best results go solo and put it to the test in strong winds. Also, thanks to the automated landing gear, you’d have to try really hard to crash this.

Overall: 4/5

or

JAE LIEW

Words

Janine Lee

Art Direction

Alvin Leow & Pyron Tan

Photography

Aik Chen

Styling

Randolph Tan

TANGLIN

STAR JAE LIEW NOT ONLY LOOKS GREAT ON THE OUTSIDE BUT OOZES GENUINENESS FROM WITHIN.

09/15028

e first noticed Jae Liew in her debut role in Michelle Chong’s

3 Peas in a Pod

. Since then, she has taken stride after firm stride in her acting career, landing her where she is right now — a main character on Channel 5’s first long-form drama,

Tanglin

. With a hectic daily schedule comprising filming, photo shoots and promo events, it’s easy to lose your head in this industry. However, the affable star pleasantly surprised us with her good-natured attitude and genuine fondness for the people around her.Liew is living proof that it isn’t impossible to lead a celebrity’s life, yet at the same time be humble, rooted and an excellent conversationalist. She holds great respect for her co-workers, genuine people and Taylor Swift (surprise, surprise). Having studied in Australia’s Murdoch University, Liew also has a degree in Communications (which explains the “being an excellent conversationalist” part) and a slight hint of an accent that intrigued us all the more. We caught up with the actress to chat about real life, life on set, and the co-worker she finds most attractive on

Tanglin

’s cast.

How does it feel being on one of Singapore’s hit shows of the moment?

Awesome, not many people get to be in the industry for two to three years and already be involved in long-form dramas.

How would you describe your character on the show?

She’s basically a tomboy. Then again, there are many sides of her that haven’t been seen yet, so just give her some time.

dolled

or

HAIR: MELISSA YEO USING LANEIGE. MAKEUP: JIMMY YAP/KENARIS SALON.PRINTED JACKET, BY MOSCHINO. LEATHER SKIRT, BY LONGCHAMP. STRAPPY WEDGE, BY CHARLES&KEITH. SUNGLASSES, BY FENDI AND MINI BAG KEYCHAIN, BY H&M.

or

JAE LIEW

CROP TOP AND SKIRT, BY ALICE+OLIVIA. HIGH TOP SNEAKERS, FROM BUSCEMI BY SALON FROM SURRENDER.SUNGLASSES, BY MARC JACOBS.

or

“I ALSO HATE DRESSING UP, SO I REALLY DON’T MIND GOING TO THE HAWKER CENTRE FOR A DATE.”

03109/15

Does your character resemble your real-life personality?

In some ways, but not so much in others. We’re both straight talking, and we both say what we want. But the difference is that I think with my head, more logically, while she thinks with her heart, more emotionally.

Who’s your favourite cast member?

Just one? This isn’t easy, you know. [

Laughs

] I guess it’ll be the Tong family as a whole. I’d love to be a part of them; they’re supportive, loving and very funny.

Who’s the most attractive cast member?

They’re all attractive; it’s hard to choose! But it’ll have to be Nat [

Ho

]. He’s a knockout; he’s very cute. First impression would have to be his face; I mean have you seen his jawline? Nat’s the complete package — he’s very attractive but he has a heart of gold at the same time.

How would you describe working on the set of Tanglin?

Awesome! It is literally the best place ever. I could not have imagined a better crew to work with.

What do you enjoy doing on your days off?

Pigging out in front of the TV. I love eating

senbei

, it’s a kind of Japanese rice cracker.

Tell us a secret about yourself.

I have a quirk — every time I walk on the street and someone bumps into me, I do this weird thing where I need to bump into someone else. I don’t really know how to explain it; it’s like this energy flowing through me and I have to pass it on. Kind of like kinetic energy in a sense. [

Laughs

]

What’s your favourite kind of music?

I listen to different types of music; English as well as Japanese and Korean music. I love Taylor Swift and Ed Sheeran. Swift is like the most awesome person ever and I have Sheeran’s

Photograph

on repeat on my mobile phone.

What’s one thing you have yet to achieve in life?

I haven’t met Ed Sheeran. What islife if you haven’t met Ed Sheeran? I’m kidding.

Where can we find you on a weekend night?

Friday nights I’ll be home in bed preparing for the

Tanglin

shoot on Saturday morning. And on Saturday night I’ll be recovering from the

Tanglin

shoot the morning earlier.

Have you experienced a really bad date?

I don’t think I have. When I’m on a date, I go with no expectations. There’s no way to disappoint me. I also hate dressing up, so I really don’t mind going to the hawker centre for a date.

What do we have to do to impress you on a first date?

Don’t try to impress me; I don’t go for that. If I’m going out with the person again, I want to know who he really is. For example, if you open the door

for me on the first few dates and stop after that, I’d rather you didn’t.

What kind of shows do you enjoy watching?

Stuff that makes me think; I love

Criminal Minds

and

Sherlock

. I drift more towards mystery and thriller shows, and I’m all right with action and comedy. I tend to stay away from chick flicks, though.

Who do you look up to most and why?

Taylor Swift. How do you manage billions of albums, tour all over the world, have such an amazing career and be so humble? When I met her at her concert, I felt this warmth and gratitude towards her; she’s so down-to-earth and amazing with her fans. I have so much respect for her; I want to be just like her.

FHM

Catch

Tanglin

on Channel 5, weeknights, 8.30pm.

or

JAE LIEW

BUTTON DOWN CROP JACKET AND HIGH WAIST SHORTS, BOTH BY BOUTIQUE MOSCHINO.

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JAE LIEW

“I WANT TO BE JUST LIKE TAYLOR SWIFT.”

or

03509/15

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JAE LIEW

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“

DON’T TRY TO IMPRESS ME. IF I’M GOING OUT WITH THE PERSON AGAIN, I WANT TO KNOW WHO HE REALLY IS.

”

03709/15

or

ACCESS

BAD GUYS

Villains. They’re all around us. In our schoolyards, on our tellies and under our beds. But what’s it like to actually be a baddie?

or

03909/15

Professor David R Dow, 55, has fought for the lives of 115 condemned murderers over the past 22 years as a death-penalty lawyer in Houston, Texas. Win or lose, he gets to know every one of his clients intimately…

Most death-penalty lawyers will tell you pure evil does not exist

. But I believe it does. I have seen it in the eyes of a handful of the 115 condemned men and women whom I have represented over the past 22 years.

Committing a murder does not make a person evil.

I work tirelessly to understand why my clients did what they did — and in the vast majority of cases, I can find an explanation. And most express regret.

It does not mean I forgive or excuse murder.

Most of my clients did something terrible. But most of them did so because, when they were young, their parents were appalling. The lucky ones were utterly ignored; the others were routinely raped or beaten; some were punished by being scalded with boiling water or burned with cigarettes. With those cases, I can map their path to murder.

My job is to convince judges that my clients do not deserve to be executed for their crimes.

What keeps me up at night is when I cannot understand why they did what they did. It is impossible to argue.

I think the concept of evil refers to a form of psychopathic anti-social behaviour from a young age.

There aren’t any environmental

e all have a little bit of villain inside of us. Even if the last time it reared its ugly head was when you were three and decapitated your sister’s favourite doll. But even if you don’t act on it (and you really shouldn’t, for all sorts of moral, philosophical, and prison-avoiding reasons), that doesn’t mean we can’t entertain villainous thoughts from time to time. That’s why writing villains is so enjoyable. You get to create a character that isn’t bound by everyday inhibitions or boring-old morality. Lily Kintner, the protagonist in my novel

The Kind Worth Killing

is by far my favourite of the characters I’ve created. She’s certainly villainous, and probably outright psychopathic, but there’s also something immensely practical about her. When Kintner decides to do something (murder someone she doesn’t like, for example), she actually goes ahead and does it. She doesn’t grapple with ethics. She just follows her worst impulses. No waffling. No guilt. And that’s why the bad guys (and the bad girls) are so much fun to write. With heroic characters, the writer has to worry about making them virtuous but also real, noble but a little flawed. None of that matters with villains. All that matters with writing villains is letting that little doll decapitator that resides inside of you run the show for a while. And then wait and see what happens next.The Kind Worth Killing

by Peter Swanson is out now.

triggers; their brains are simply wired differently to the rest of us, making them incapable of registering human empathy.

It is truly chilling to sit across from somebody whom you believe is evil.

I have heard people describe committing a murder or a sexual assault in the way that you or I might talk about having jaywalked or running a red light.

I’ve talked to people from apparently stable homes who were beating cats to death with baseball bats at the age of seven.

And at some point they graduated on to killing human beings. I cannot explain that and it drives me mad.Grieving families of people my clients have killed do at times direct their anger at me. A mother once threw coffee over me outside the prison. That is emotionally hard — it hurts. I take it as a signal of how much pain they’re in and of how much they loved the person who was killed.

I get confronted at parties for what I do constantly.

Most people express utter incomprehension at what I do and that somehow I am representing the wrong side of justice. If you can’t allow that to flow off you like water off a duck’s back, then you can’t be a death-penalty lawyer in Texas.

Still, I tell myself four or five times a day that I should quit and do something else.

The emotional weight of the family members, in particular, is difficult to carry. But I’ll never give up.

What drives me? The basic belief that America is behaving immorally in applying different rules for rich and poor.

It takes people who don’t have resources and subjects them to this dramatic final punishment. Nobody who has resources faces that.

There is another reason why I defend death-row murderers to the end.

To me, the saddest thing in the world is when somebody dies alone. Death is the most solemn and grave thing that we face and I think, at the moment of death, we are all human beings. Nobody, no matter what they’ve done, should die alone.

I believe in what I do.

And if you believe something deeply and sincerely — and you have arrived at that belief in an honest, legitimate way — you are not being true to yourself if you allow criticism to deflect you from what you consider to be the proper path to follow. This is mine.

David’s memoir about his career as a death-penalty lawyer,

The Autobiography Of An Execution

is out now.

By thriller writer Peter Swanson

or

ACCESS

09/15040

BAD GUYS

Over the past three decades, actor Robert Englund, 67, has played one of the most infamous villains in Hollywood history: Face-melted child-killer Freddy Krueger…

Some actors famous for one character call it a typecast. For me, Freddy was a gift.

Not only was he a wonderful character to play, but he made me an international star who works all over the world. I cannot begrudge that as an actor.

I’d sooner be a villain than a hero.

It’s much more liberating — he isn’t saddled with character exposition as heroes are, so you can be freer with how you play him. Operatic even.

What makes Freddy Krueger a great villain?

Freddy is playing the most intimate mind game. Because he exists in your subconscious, he knows your most inner thoughts — your sexual fantasies, your fears, your diary, what you’ve hidden in your underwear draw. And he’s in there sifting around, toying with your dreams like a cat with a half-dead sparrow.

Like any great baddie, he loves his work.

There’s something darkly poetic about the phrase “child killer” — he is killing the future.

Freddy’s sense of humour only made him darker.

He might gut some poor child, give him the kiss of death and let him cling to his body as he slowly drops to the ground.

When dressed as Freddy, I sort of become him — without the killing.

I used to terrorise my co-star, the beautiful Heather Langenkamp, by telling her every filthy lewd joke I knew, and got away with it because I was Freddy, not Robert.

It took four hours every morning to make me Freddy.

It began with basting my face with KY Jelly, then layers of latex.

The older I get, the more I look like Freddy.

It is a little disconcerting, but when I first played him I was a young man made up to look older. Am I turning into Freddy?

At a recent Q&A with fans, I made a woman run from the room screaming.

I was asked to sing Freddy’s song — “One, two, Freddy’s coming for you” — and she just lost it.

My biggest fear was losing my ability to scare people.

So, when doubts set in, I’d lurk in shadows behind the set until some gaffer came for a cigarette. Then I’d move into a shaft of light, and growl, “Gotcha”. It never failed to make them shit their pants.

A lot of women tell me they find Freddy darkly sexy.

For some girls, he represents both fear and titillation.

I’ve lost count of the number of cleavages I’ve autographed.

I’ve signed a lot of women with tattoos of me on their breasts, asses or way, way up high inside their thighs. They sometimes then go off and get my autograph tattooed and come back to show it to me all bruised and bloody. That’s interesting.

Englund’s latest film,

The Last Showing,

is available on iTunes.

Chris Mattison, 40, has been working in security for 15 years, starting out at Manchester City FC. He is assistant security manager at Manchester’s Albert Hall and works high-profile events including the Warehouse Project.

When I ask someone to leave, they know they’ve done something wrong.

Nine times out

I have a laugh and joke with people, befriend them as they come in.

People don’t expect banter, and that works because people remember me. Hundreds of people say

“

hi

”

to me.

In all the time I’ve been working security, I’ve never hit anyone.

When you get abuse, you just have to deal with it. Never take it personally. You can’t. If you take it personally, you’re in the wrong job.

Forty per cent of the company I work for, FGH Security, have degrees.

They study in the day. The doorman image has changed.

One new club we worked at got tough.

We had the wrong characters turning up week after week, trying to intimidate us. We stood our ground and they just gave up. It was a battle of wills.

When I’m out, I don’t much like other doormen

. I won’t name places but I sometimes get proper attitude. Some stand there, and do the

“

stern look

”

, and it makes me cringe. For every 10 good doormen, there is one bad one.of 10, I don’t have to touch them, they’ll just walk out. I’ll be fair and straight with them.

or

04109/15

Legendary free climber Alain Robert, 52, has scaled the world’s tallest buildings and been arrested more times than he can count…

I have been arrested at least 100 times.

In Australia, I was banned for 10 years; China was only five.

As a child I wanted to climb, but I was afraid of heights.

I felt discouraged as it was what I wanted to be but I just couldn’t — two or three metres and I was already afraid. But I fought hard and overcame it. I still suffer from vertigo though.

A lot of cops like to take pictures of me.

Sometimes they ask ifI can show them exercises. And then some of them are f**king assholes.

In Japan, the police started punching my face.

When I went to the building I wanted to climb, there were like 50 cops waiting for me. They cordoned the whole area and said I wasn’t allowed near. I did finally climb the next day and they didn’t like it.

I’m fine with some people thinking I’m a “bad guy”.

I know I’m not really a criminal. For me, it’s important to have people who don’t play by the rules. I think I’m a good example of freedom. Life is something that has to be funny, and kicking the ass of the authorities — it’s fun. Provoking them, I kind of like it.

Once I fell head first and, another time, I landed on my wrist.

Both are really damaged and I’m now partially paralysed. My hand should be positioned in a different way and my bones don’t allow me to rotate it. It means my strength is not as good as it should be, and then on top of that one of my nerves has been cut, so I’ve lost sensitivity in two fingers.

You can arrest me, you can ban me from your country, but I’m not going to stop.

Never. Sometimes it is illegal, but this is what I enjoy. No one can stop me.

Standing at the top of a skyscraper is unique and amazing.

Is it the best feeling in the world? It’s better than sex.

By screenwriter Hossini Amini

Charisma

The toughest bad guys look like an angel. Alain Delon in

Le Samourai

. Satan in

Milton’s Paradise Lost

was literally an angel.

Lethality

Whether it’s a knife or lightsaber, the baddie has to use it better than anyone else. Think Edward Fox shooting the watermelon with his sniper rifle in

The Day of the Jackal

.

Stoic

Bad guys don’t need to use words. They just stare (or glare) and wait for anyone foolish enough to challenge them.

Deceptive kindness

A gentle appearance makes a villain even more shocking: Fonda’s sympathetic blue eyes before he shoots the kid dead in

Once Upon a Time in the West

.

Cool car or horse

Great bad guys need equally menacing rides like the Dodge Charger in

Bullitt

or the Witch-king of Angmar in

Lord of the Rings

.

Dignity

All villains have to die sometime and when they do, it’s great if they go out with dignity. One of my favourite quotes is “every villain is the hero of their own story”.

Hossini’s latest film,

The Two Faces of January,

is out now on DVD

.

or

ACCESS

09/15042

BAD GUYS

Pop culture junkie Catherine Brayw on the baddies who stole the show.

Colonel Kurtz

(Marlon Brando)

in

Apocalypse Now

(1979)In the book, Kurtz is tall and thin, so when Brando showed up overweight, knowing none of his lines, you could’ve given the director an instant firing. Instead, he improvised, rambling 18-minute speeches including, “You’re an errand boy, sent by grocery clerks, to collect a bill.”

Malcolm Tucker

(Peter Capaldi)

in

The Thick of It

(2005)Come the f**k in and meet one of the greatest villains ever to grace the corridors of power or f**k the f**k off. Peter Capaldi subsequently even went head to head with Alastair Campbell in a charity swear-athon. It was basically

Alien vs Predator

, if aliens and predators had a penchant for calling people massive f**king faff arses.

Cruella De Vil

(Glenn Close)

in

101 Dalmatians

(1996)Disney is pretty great at villains in general, but Cruella De Vil eclipses the lot. The demonic fur-obsessive who wants to kill, skin and wear all those adorable puppies could hardly have seemed eviler if her surname spelled out “devil”. Oh. Wait.

The Joker

(Heath Ledger)

in

The Dark Knight

(2008)Do you want to see a magic trick? Absolutely not, you massive psycho. There’s a reason literally every suburban sixth former’s tried emulating the look of the late Heath Ledger in

The Dark Knight

, and it’s the same reason they hadn’t a chance in hell of pulling it off: It’s a study in pure nihilistic glee.

Stringer Bell

(Idris Elba)

in

The Wire

(2002)

The Wire

was never about straight-up heroes and villains — it was all about the shades of grey — which means that to stand out as a double-hard bastard above all others, you really had to have your double-hard bastardry nailed. He even outshone his own supposedly bigger, badder bosses. Where’s Wallace, Stringer? WHERE’S WALLACE?

Anton Chigurh

(Javier Bardem)

in

No Country For Old Men

(2007)What’s the most you’ve lost on a coin toss? If you ever come face-to-face with Anton Chigurh and his unflattering bowl cut, we’re talking more than settling whose turn it is to unjam the printer. Can anyone remember the plot of

No Country

? Money?

The Operative

(Chiwetel Ejiofor)

in

Serenity

(2005)“I’m a monster. What I do is evil… but it must be done.” A philosophical assassin labouring under no illusions about the fact that he’s, y’know, the villain of the piece, Joss Whedon’s

Serenity

provided a showcase for Chiwetel Ejiofor’s considerable talents as the evil and sadistic Operative long before

12 Years a Slave

came along.

Hannibal Lecter

(Anthony Hopkins)

in

The Silence of the Lambs

(1991)That Sir Anthony managed to turn one of the most frankly ludicrous mannerisms ever committed to camera — a slurping noise? — into a genuine chiller is enough to justify that Oscar. Add to that his complete upstaging of the real villain of the piece, who lest we forget, was a dude making “a woman suit” and you have one of cinema’s all-time greats.

or

04309/15

As a journeyman boxer, Johnny Greaves, 36, from London, was paid to travel the country to challenge upcoming fighters earmarked for the big time… and let them win. Always the away fighter and always the villain, this is his story…

I’ve climbed into the ring with phlegm literally dripping off my back more times than I can remember.

I’ve been called every name under the sun, threatened, abused, even chased from venues. But that’s the lot of a journeyman boxer: Always the away fighter; always the villain; the most hated man in the room.

Boxing isn’t a sport; it’s a business.

No promoter is going to pay for your fights out of his own pocket unless he is sure you are going to get to a level to repay him.

I understood this from an early age. I knew I was a good boxer, but I also knew I wouldn’t win world titles.

So I became a journeyman — fodder for those fighters who had been earmarked for the big time. I became the best in the business.

There weren’t many opportunities for a kid like me, growing up in London’s east end.

So when, aged 28, a promoter offered me $2,500 to go four rounds against some up-and-coming kid in Middlesbrough, I jumped at the chance. “Go in there,” he told me, “dance about and put on a good show… but whatever you do, DO NOT WIN.” It was the easiest money ever.

I became the guy who’d take a fight at an hour’s notice, anywhere in the country.

Out of 100 fights, I lost 96. I was known as the guy who never got knocked out and always lost well. I fought nearly 20 British champions, two world champions, Commonwealth champs and fought in stadiums of 20,000 people.

Walking into an arena full of thousands of people who wanted me hurt,

I’d often say to myself, “F**k this lot. I’m going to get in there and wind them up too, the f**kers.”That’s where the Ali stuff came in. I’d do a little shuffle, cup my hand over my ear or do a wanker sign at the crowd. I f**king loved it. The crowd not so much: C**t this, slag that, death threats.

I loved winding opponents up, too.

I’d whisper things like, “You brush your teeth this morning, mate? F**k… you stink.”

I’ll never forget fighting in Portsmouth in 2013.

I was paid $850 extra to make sure the guy won. But he came out like a steam train in the first round and blew his beans.

At one point I was literally holding him up over my shoulder,

whispering in his ear to f**king stand up. The crowd were so angry when I won. They wanted to give me a good hiding.

The money meant I could give my kids the life I never had.

But, in the end, being the panto villain began to take its toll. I wanted to taste glory for myself. My ambition was always to reach 100 professional fights; to make my parents, wife and kids proud.

That day came on 29 September 2013 in east London’s famous York Hall,

a stone’s throw from where I grew up. No amount of money would make me lose that fight. And win I did. Apart from seeing my kids born, it was the best day of my life. I was, for once, the good guy.

BARELY BADDISAPPOINTINGGENERICSINISTERTURBO BASTARDTHE PENGUIN

(

Batman Returns

)Obese, pervy-looking dwarf witha quasi-sexual penguin obsession.

ERROL CHILDRESS

(

True Detective

)Chubster who pales in comparison to the villain we’d built up in our minds.

BOWSER

(

Mario Bros.

)No discernible characteristics other than “is bad”.

ARNOLD ROTHSTEIN

(

Boardwalk Empire

)Eerie, calm, punctuated by terrifying rage.

KING EDWARD I

(

Braveheart

)Murderous, psychotic hell-king.

or

ACCESS

09/15044

BAD GUYS

Between 2004 and 2014, John Murphy, 53, worked as an inspector for the Metropolitan Police Territorial Support Group. He’s been on the frontline of many public disturbances. He never felt more hated than during the 2011London riots…

6 August 2011 is a day burned on my memory for as long as I live.

Standing in the middle of Tottenham High Road, the first thing I saw was a police car on fire. I felt

Bob Asprey, 61, has been chairman of Millwall FC Supporters’ Association for a decade and a fan since his youth. He knows better than most what it is like to support one of English football’s most hated clubs…

Telling somebody that you’re a Millwall fan generally triggers one kind of response:

“Really? But you don’t look like a violent moron? Who was the last person you punched on the nose?” It’s just the sort of conversation starter that tends to come about when you support one of the most hated clubs in the history of English football.

There’s no smoke without fire, of course

, as the media are eager to remind us every time they roll out the famous 1985 footage [

a riot involving Millwall’s Bushwacker firm, which sparked the government’s decision to increase security at football grounds

].

Like every other club, we have a grim history of hooliganism.

And, of course, there are still elements of our support who get their kicks out of getting some kicks in.

We are desperately trying to shed our “hooligan” image.

But it’s hard, as the press are never going to pick up on the good things we do. It just doesn’t fit with the stereotype.

That’s not to say that a lot of the fans don’t relish that reputation

, of course, they do. Our trademark chant is, “No one likes us, we don’t care.” The New Den is the most aggressive atmosphere you’ll find in league football.

The Premier League has become too sanitised;

many clubs have alienated their passionate old-school support in search of appeasing Sky [

TV station

] and making vast amounts of money. The way things are going, Millwall will be the last bastions of working-class football. It often works against us, of course. If we travel up north we’ll be greeted by more police than we have supporters.

It’s easy to see how a siege mentality could develop.

Police cause agro, trip us up as we leave the station and, on occasion, I’ve seen them physically abuse fans as young as 15.

While the club and fans may argue about what they ultimately want Millwall to represent,

we’re still part of the same family. Many of our supporters love to play the bad guy, and an equal number hate that reputation. At the end of the day, however much we argue, we’ve all got to look out for each other. That’s what families do.

my body tense up as rea

li

se

thi

s was no ordinary demonstration.

The ferocity we faced that night was like nothing I’ve ever seen.

We were facing 300 rioters throwing rocks and charging our lines with weapons. They were trying to kill us.I never expected to see that level of hatred.

I’m not ashamed to say I was frightened. I think we all were

. Fear is one of the most basic human emotions.

I saw a female officer suffer a seizure after a rock hit her on the head.

That was frightening for everyone as the ambulances were a long way behind us. They put her on a makeshift stretcher and got her out of there as quickly as possible. Another officer had a brick hit his riot helmet. The visor crumpled under the weight of it.

Could I see their point of view? Of course.

Mark Duggan was killed [

by a police officer

]. There’s going to be an outpouring of grief.

How does it feel to be seen as the bad guy? Not good.

But if someone’s hellbent on anarchy, you won’t win them over. You have to minimise casualties on both sides.

Sometimes the red mist comes down and cops lose control.

Cops are human beings, and if someone has tried to stab you, you might react badly.

I’ll never forget seeing a frozen salmon flying over my head.

The rioters had broken into a fishmongers. It must’ve weighed about 9kg.

The shopkeepers were giving us drinks.

One of my friends was trying to give them money, in the middle of a riot, and they just said, “Take them.” So on one side of the shields, you had the anger and, on the other, the generosity of these people, trying to give us pop.

My best friend’s dad was a cop, and years ago he said, “John, police are a necessary evil.”

That’s a very dramatic way to describe it… but it’s true.

FHM

or

Q1.

How did you mark April Fools’ Day this year?

A

You put all the clocks in your house forward an hour.

B

With some ill-judged joke on Twitter about anal sex.

C

FFS, do people still do April Fools’ pranks?

D

Set elaborate

Home Alone

-style booby traps for

your dad. Then flmed him

being covered in glue and feathers. Then made a Vine out of the footage.

Q2.

Which of these are you most likely to do in the shower?

A

Use someone else’s pricey Original Source bodywash.

B

Shave your wild pubes using a disposable razor that ain’t yours.

C

Sing some classic Hall & Oates, occasionally making up the lyrics.

D

Stage your own “dirty protest” just to see what it would look like, then wash it all away.

Q3.

What’s the worst thing that you could open on a crowded train?

Q 4.

How do you greet your work colleagues?

A

“Waasssaaaaap! Hey check out the banter on this YouTube video!”

B

With a wet willy.

C

With a nod and a mumbled, “Alright, mate.”

D

With your actual willy.

Q5.

Your girlfriend wants to do something Saturday. What do you suggest?

A

Paintballing with all your mates.

B

You want to play

Call of Duty

, so lie and say you’re busy.

C

A lovely exhibition followed by a bit of dinner.

D

Be suspicious as to why she wants you out of the house. Insist on reading through every single text messages on phone.

Q 6.

You see a mate waiting at a bus stop in the rain. What do you do?

A

Beep your horn loads and shout “bus wanker” at them before stopping.

B

Splash them with a puddle, give a sly grin and drive on.

C

Pull over and offer a lift.

D

Think about how much enjoyment ploughing your car into them would bring. Laugh out loud to yourself for 10 minutes.

Q7.

What’s in your pocket on a night out?

Mostly As

You’re not a bad person, but unfortunately you are a bit of a prat. Perhaps tone down your twattishness a tad and have a word with yourself from time to time.

Mostly Bs

Congratulations, you are quite the shitbag. Perhaps not evil, but you’re probably not the nicest person to sit next to at a wedding, and we bet you’re prone to the odd bit of trolling.

Mostly Cs

What a nice chap you must be. No skeletons in your closet, as you’re just an all-round decent person. (Unless you’re brilliant at hiding your dickishness).

Mostly Ds

Goodness, you’re a really nasty piece of work, aren’t you? Take a long, hard look at yourself and consider becoming an estate agent or joining a death cult, you shit human.

Are you a mildly tittish twerp, a poison-dripping pariah or just a straight-up nice guy?

A CDBDB A C

or

FHM MODELS 2015 FIRST RUNNER󰀭UP MICHELLE LOW IS AN EXTRAORDINARY EXAMPLE OF YOUR ORDINARY GIRL.

MICHELLE LOW

SOME KIND OFWONDERFUL

Words

Aakash Rama

Art direction

Pyron Tan

Photography

Hong Chee Yan

Styling

Arthur Tan

or

BRA SET, BY ADDICTION NOUVELLE LINGERIE FROM KATE BY PERK, KNITTED WEAR, BY LNA FROM ECLECTICISM.HAIR: ESTHER JOOYEE/STUDI

@

PE. MAKEUP: MODEL HERSELF.

or

MICHELLE LOW

or

04909/15

fter living the party scene for a few years, Michelle has grown fond of a simpler and more relaxed lifestyle. However, being such a badass in the past, she still bears the marks of her rebellious phase in the form of eye-catching tattoos — a stark contrast to the calmness in her current life. Her professionalism and love for modelling shone through during our time with her in front of the camera, but it’s her story that has us captivated.

Have you been modelling long?

I’ve been doing lingerie shoots since I was 15 — back in 2010.

What do you enjoy about it?

This is weird, but I like to take pictures of myself [

Laughs

]. I basically like looking at my own figure. I guess it’s sort of similar to the male mentality of working out and whatnot and then looking at themselves or taking pictures of themselves.

You mentioned being a manicurist. How does that work?

It’s very similar to my modelling career in the sense that they’re both

As if being gifted with gorgeous looks isn’t enough, FHM Models first runner-up and fan favourite Michelle Low also cooks, models and is a manicurist.

freelance gigs. I only do it when I have appointments, or when someone calls me down. It’s erratic, because one week I may have lots of slots but the next week I may have none. It’s unpredictable.

What’s your guilty pleasure?

Strawberries and whipped cream, but I just like eating them, nothing else!

What’s your idea of a relaxed day?

Basically to lie in bed all day, doing nothing. Isn’t that something everyone enjoys doing though? I enjoy cooking and playing video games as well. Battlefield, Diablo, Minecraft, Killzone and GTA 5! It’s great to be in

bed while eating and playing games.

What’s your favourite food to cook?

I personally enjoy spicy food a lot, but I love cooking something I call my yellow ginger chicken. It’s fairly simple, but so delicious! Especially with the use of ingredients like onions, garlic, ginger and chili padi for that extra spice that I love.

Tell us about your tattoos.

I got my first tattoo when I was 13 — I was in the middle of this phase where for some reason I was just into blood and gore

[Laughs

]. I did my second tattoo when I was 15 and in this sort of rebellious phase. But the tattoo artist did a bad job so I was really upset about that. My third tattoo came along when I was 17, not much of a story there; I just kind of wanted it.

CORSET, BY LA PERLA.

or

MICHELLE LOW

BRA SET, BY GOOSEBERRY INTIMATES FROM JODI VINCE @BRATIQUE.

or

You started lingerie modelling at 15, was it uncomfortable being that young?

There’s actually a story here. Basically it wasn’t the greatest first experience as I almost got scammed by the photographer — he was very inappropriate and tried to hit on me! I wasn’t very comfortable with the whole situation so I just left after a while. It’s scary because I was young and pretty inexperienced so I didn’t really know what was going on but luckily I left when I did. Things did get better after a few more shoots with different photographers though, I started to feel more comfortable in my own skin, and even started enjoying it.

What’s one thing people don’t know about you?

Back when I was in school, there was this boy who kept bullying me. One day, he was disturbing me while I was doing something for the teacher, and I basically injured him. Not badly, but enough for him not to disturb me again. It was such a long time ago so let’s not go into details okay? [

Laughs

]

What kind of music do you listen to?

I’m really into French singer Alizee right now. Aside from that I listen to lots of electro pop, trance, R&B, and I also love Beyonce. I also listen to dancey music, kind of like Shakira or Jennifer Lopez. I love the song

Hips Don’t Lie

.

Where would we find you on a Saturday night?

These days I’ll probably be at home eating, maybe playing games or spending time with my boyfriend.

And in the past?

I used to club a fair bit, so you’d probably find me in a club, maybe Zouk. I don’t really club all that often these days, but if I do, I’ll be around Clarke Quay. Maybe F-Club or something — all those who head down to Clarke Quay should know anyway!

FHM

“IT’S GREAT TO BE IN BED WHILE EATING AND PLAYING GAMES, FROM

BATTLEFIELD

,

DIABLO

AND

MINECRAFT

TO

KILLZONE

AND

GTA 5

.”

or

ACCESS

GIRLFRIEND

As with so many things in life,

Fifty Shades Of Grey

is to blame. When EL James’ series of pervy novels became a zeitgeist-straddling porno phenomenon, a new fear descended over the men of Singapore. What if it was no longer enough to be quite good at sex? What if, in light of the raunchy sado-sex revolution exploding all around, we had to become bullwhip-wielding, sneering bedroom masters of the universe to cut it?Girls, it was decided, were no longer interested in supermarket own-brand lovemaking. Does the bottom draw of your bedside table contain nipple clamps, a ball gag and an economy-sized vat of Durex Play O lube? No? Then get back to the ’50s, you buttoned-up weirdo! The world has moved on. Thankfully, this turned out to be a load of tosh. At

FHM

, we compel you to (carefully) put down the rubber dildo and rediscover the basics of love and sex. Because what good is a latex bukkake dungeon if you aren’t able to spoon your lovely girlfriend afterwards? We asked romantic woman Stevie Martin to come together (giggle) with comedian Naz Osmanoglu and relationships expert James Preece to devise a guide to the fundamentals of romance. The stuff that we, as a civilisation, are in danger of forgetting.

Girls can effortlessly do it one-handed, behind our backs, so how hard can it be? Apparently, quite hard.“They are too niche for their own good – like hipsters,” says Naz Osmanoglu. “Very difficult to open in one fluid hand motion. Why not buttons? Or a toggle? Even a sandwich bag zip would be easier. Or cufflinks. It’s basically alien technology that requires a thumb scan and loads of awkward pissing about.” More helpful is Preece’s advice for nailing it in one: “Just put your thumb and forefinger either side of the clasp and squeeze. Use both of your hands, as she won’t be able to see what you’re up to anyway.”

HOW TO

A

BR A

UNDO

This strikes fear into most humans, but all you need to do is watch a YouTube tutorial and maybe practi

e

on a dog or something. “Get them to relax, light a candle and play some relaxing music to get them in the mood,” suggests James Preece. “Move your hands slowly and gently, easing away any tension. The best place to start isthe shoulders, neck and back, moving your way down.”

MASSAGE

HOW TO

09/15022

If she says “ARGH” then move to a different area.

or

02309/15

If you don’t make the effort with her mates, you’re not making an effort with her, and she’ll think you're a dick. “You need to get them on your side as they'll be the ones she talks to when you have problems,” says Preece, sagely. “Make them laugh, buy them drinks and, above all, show them you like her. Ask your girlfriend about them every now and again and accept invitations when you know they will be there, even if you don't want to.” And most of the time, you won't want to. Because other people’s friends are crap.

HOW TO GET ON WITH HER

FRIENDS

3

friends that every girl has

THE TRAGIC ONE

For whatever reason, ladies tend to have one girl mate who is perpetually unlucky in love and always in need of a two-hour WhatsApp pep talk.

How to win her over:

You need to become her gay best friend, without being gay. Unless you want to. Whatever.

THE FUN ONE

Her mate from uni that appears to be the source of every anecdote involving tequila, rugby players and vomiting in cabs. In spite of yourself, you’ll actually be jealous of her.


Pop the tequilas (even if it’s Monday).

THE SOLID󰀭GOLD BEZZIE

They’ve been friends since infant school and appear on each other’s Facebook feeds in every other photo.


Do everything in your power to endear yourself to her, short of transferring $30,000 into her bank account.

or

09/15024

GIRLFRIEND

If you organise a surprise weekend away, a meal, picnic, trip to the zoo, or literally anything, then you get roughly 40,000 romance points. Basically, pick something you’ve seen in a typically romantic film and emulate it. Get one of her mates to check she’s free, figure out her movements and, yeah it sounds a bit creepy, but no girl ever said: “He surprised me with a romantic gesture this weekend, what an absolute prick.” Ask for it in a casual way, like it’s no big deal.Immediately call the number she’s just given you while she’s standing there, “just to make sure”.Joke that you are saving her into your contacts under “enigmatic babe”…Tell her she’s going into your phone under the name “Richard” because of your “psycho girlfriend”. Both of you know that the underlying message is “I want to bone you big time”, but there’s no way round it. “This is difficult,” says Osmanoglu. “Which is weird because in life we get asked to fill out our contact details all the time. Maybe it would feel more natural if you gave her a form to fill out.”

HOW TOFOR HER

NUMBER

ASK A GIRL

HOW TO

SUPRISE

HER

or

02509/15

“What happens when the sex is over, you’re spooning and you realise your drummer wants to do another solo?” worries Preece. Presuming that’s a metaphor, boners are fine during spooning provided you reference them (there is nothing worse than unreferenced wood), otherwise neither of you will sleep because you’re both wondering if you’re about to have sex again. If you want it, say. If you don’t, then make a joke about your boner. Then have a spoony sleep. “Girls love spooning,” says Preece. “Spoon them while they fall asleep and you’ll come across as protective and deepen your bond.”Send her a funny text message a few hours later.Ask her out over text and, when you don’t get an immediate reply, tell her she’s a “stuck-up clown” who has “blown it forever”.

HOW TO

S P OO N

K I S S - K I S S B A N G B A N G

We asked all the girls we know what their biggest gripes are when it comes to men kissing. Here’s their top five:

5

Not using hands at all

4

Keeping eyes open (creepy)

3

Stubble rash

2

Too tight-lipped

1

Excessively forceful tongue

Unless she’s explicitly asked you not to, hold her hand at every available opportunity. Even if you’re on fire. It’s the easiest thing in the world, unless neither of you have hands.

Not. Too. Hard. Thank you. “Don’t just go in for the kill unexpectedly,” says Preece. “Take it very slowly and let her moans, hands and reactions guide you as to how it’s going.” Also, don’t try to lick her oesophagus.

HOW TO

KISS

HOW TO STAY

AFTER AN ARGUMENT

R O M A N T I C

All couples fight but it’s what you do afterwards that really makes or breaks your romance credentials. If you’ve been a dick, say sorry. If she’s been a dick, say you’re sorry you argued and hopefully that will encourage her to say sorry. Immediately suggest something nice to do in the near future like going to dinner. Or abseiling. Done.

or

09/15026

GIRL FRIEND

Or, indeed, this could be a love e-mail, extended WhatsApp, or particularly intimate text. “It’s tough without it sounding like a silly joke, or worse, a piece of evidence to be used in court,” says Preece. “If you say, ‘Your eyes are so beautiful,give them to me’, things can get dark quickly.”Preece advises, “Avoid cheesy poems or anything that might suggest it’s a joke. Treat it seriously and talk about the things you might do in the future. She’ll start to imagine you being a big part in it.”“We get old and get used to each other. We think alike. We read each other’s minds.”

Johnny Cash to June Carter

“Time passes swiftly, but is it not joyous to see how great and growing is the treasure we have gathered together.”

Winston Churchill to wife Clementine

“My love has made me selfish. I cannot exist without you — I am forgetful of everything but seeing you again.”

John Keats to his neighbour Fanny Brawne

“You don’t realise, of course, how fascinatingly beautiful you have always been.”

Richard Burton to Elizabeth Taylor

GREATEST OPENINGS

LOVELETTERS

THETOOF

LETTER

HOW TO WRITE

LOV E

ALL TIME

or

Mint Condition

Breakin’ My Heart (Pretty Brown Eyes)

This one is tried and tested. A good one to let her know how you feel, whatever the colour of her eyes.

Wee

I Think I am in Love with You

This one is for the more sophisticated lady. You can really impress her with your musical knowledge. Don’t forget to tell her you have a copy of the $2,000 OG vinyl pressing at your parents’ crib.

BJ The Chicago Kid

Good Luv’n

Honestly, this guy’s the only person making these kind of songs nowadays and actually doing them justice.

Teena Marie

Turnin’ Me On

You can file this one with the BJ song above. Great to get down to. RIP to the great Lady Tee.

Lil’ Louis

Do U Luv Me

If she’s sick of all the slushy R&B and wants something a little more up tempo, this one is perfect. And still sweet enough to melt a raver girl’s heart.

Deborah Cox

Nobody’s Supposed to be Here

This list wouldn’t be right without a straight-up slow jam. In the 1990s’ R&B canon, this hangs a little left of centre, but is still guaranteed to make your lady weak at the knees.

Smooth producer and DJ extraordinaire Budgie on the tracks you need lined up and ready to go the first time she stays over…

SET THE

HOW TO

S C E N E

“

It’s hard,” says Osmanoglu “‘Going out’ just seems so childish; ‘Do you wanna date?’, too American. ‘Wanna hang out?’ is too vague. ‘You, me, exclusive sex?’ To be fair, this one is quite good. ‘Would you like to skip and hold hands and roll around in hay and frolic all day long?’ Too mental. ‘Could I borrow your copy of

Das Boot

?’ has worked for me in the past, but there's a limited amount of times you can really use this.”Just say “Do you think I can refer to you as my girlfriend now?” in a jokey kind of accent to mask any awkwardness. Nothing like a Jamaican

patois

to distract her from your feelings.

FHM

“You never know whether to go in hard or try the more sensitive approach. And it’s a constant struggle not to blurt out, ‘Oh, by the way, I’m boffing your daughter’,” says Osmanoglu, king of parent charming. Look, just be polite and don’t try too hard. If sweat drips into your eyes and blinds you, turn it down a notch. “Be as respectful as possible and try to find mutual interests to talk about,” says Preece. “This could be sports, holidays, television shows or hobbies. Play it safe. And definitely avoid sarcasm wherever possible.”

HOW TO ASK HER

TO BE YOUR

GIRLFRIEND

HOW TO

IMPRESS

HER DAD

02709/15

or

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