By popular demand, a brief(ish)overview of my life.
> born in the early 90s in the Bible belt
> precocious
> molested by my father from ages 2 to 4
> dad dies while driving drunk. I still remember viewing his body.
> introverted, loved reading
> few friends in elementary and middle school
> always got good grades, but found school boring
> stay home all of 8th grade by faking an illness because I don’t like being around the other kids
> atheist from an early age, spend my free time reading about philosophy and arguing on the internet
> first girlfriend, first kiss, and first sex at age 15
> relationship becomes ugly, mutually emotionally abusive, leaves scars
> next girlfriend is a theater kid, become friends with them even though I don’t do theater
> social skills improve with practice. Everyone at school thinks I’m a serial killer but likes me anyway
> start smoking cigarettes because a girl I cast a magic spell on to seduce (I know, this contradicts the atheism) offered me one after sex
> have a really great math teacher. She asks what I’m planning to major in. I say philosophy. She basically informs me I’m going to study physics instead, and gives me some books
> around this time, I get addicted to adderall and I also find the books she gave me fascinating. I start drawing hypercubes on everything and independently derive a result about the number of bounding m-surfaces of n-dimensional cubes
> adderall addiction leads to sleeplessness, which leads to hallucinations, so I quit
> partying all the time, drinking, smoking weed. Notorious for showing up to first period smelling like cigarettes
> outspoken about atheism, protest anti-gay bullying. People think I’m gay but I don’t care. Girls like me
> graduate a national merit scholar with 27 hours of AP credit, state school gives me a full ride
> double major in math and physics
> road trip to Occupy Wall St my first semester with 4 other people, trading off drivers so we don’t have to stop
> in NY, we spend the night in the house of a Russian dancing shoe salesman who also runs an import/export business of Damascus steel hunting knives made by a guy in a cabin in Siberia and electric-shock-based masturbation equipment
> he wakes us up in the morning by singing at the top of his lungs
> get in a car chase because we negotiated down our taxi fare and the other taxi drivers were mad about it
> date one girl in college, very pretty but very dumb. When the infatuation wears off and I realize how dumb she is, I break up with her
> turn 21, drinking gets very bad. Still graduate summa cum laude, two full degrees with over 200 total hours, outstanding senior in both the math and physics departments, perfect GRE score (well, I got 5.5/6 on the writing part)
> go to Stanford for mathematical finance. Finish one semester but take a leave because my mental health and substance abuse have become too much to handle
> live with my aunt and uncle for a while
> try again at Stanford, collapse into a puddle immediately, never leave my room, drop out
> post about suicide on facebook. A girl I knew in undergrad says she’s couch-surfing and as lost as me, and I’m welcome to come couch surf with her
> fly to Colorado to do this, we spend 6 weeks at her grandma’s farm. Grandma grows her own weed and spends her time watching infowars inside a netting she believes to be a Faraday cage. Very kind woman
> fly back to Palo Alto since I’m still paying rent, hang out there, then buy a van off craigslist for $900 and start traveling the country
> eventually we start dating. She insists on polyamory, I acquiesce (I don’t recommend this)
> settle in Albany, NY
1/?