‘Poor things’: Roshni Chopra reveals mom guilt drives her to ‘fight with husband’

Reflecting on the same, Priya Parulekar, a consulting psychologist, explained that since evolutionary times, the mother has been the primary nurturer of the baby because her body is built to carry the baby in her womb, give birth to, and breastfeed them. “So, obviously, the impact of motherhood is more on the mother,” she said.

According to her, mom guilt refers to the guilt a woman faces once she becomes a new mother.

What do new moms feel guilty about?

1 ) If they are breastfeeding enough.
2) If they are nurturing the baby properly
3) If their partner has adopted the role of father as effortlessly as they have
4) Navigating self-doubt and/or postpartum depression/insecurity about the partner.
5) Dealing with physical changes in their body.
6) Dealing with time management as their body clock changes according to the baby’s circadian cycle, which keeps changing.

Mom guilt refers to the guilt a woman faces once she becomes a new mother. (Source: Freepik)

“These factors affect the emotional health of the mother and, in turn, leave a deep impact on the relationship with her partner. She is the one who has gone through these physical and emotional changes, so she feels that her partner does not understand her. He may also not understand the baby’s needs as well as her. All this might make the woman resent her partner and his comfort. The partner may also feel left out of the mom-baby equation. His attempts to nurture the baby may not always be as well received as hers,” she continued.

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Stressing that parenting is one of the best roles a couple can play, Parulekar said they should not hesitate to ask for help if they feel overwhelmed with the new responsibilities. “Also, it is of utmost importance to get a lot of rest — as opposed to going for a dinner date — as it recuperates the body and mind and will reduce strain on the relationship. So, set your priorities right. But do not worry about the relationship too much since two adults can navigate and fix a void in the relationship far more quickly than fixing issues stemming from a void while nurturing a baby,” she said.