Fighting in Ruins 17

<Quicksilver>

Back in my own personal sanctuary, with Juggernaut. Nobody saw me limp. Nobody suspects the damage. At least it didn't crack. I reached up and turned off all incoming and outgoing transmissions on my Hero Band. Nobody sees this.

Rolling over on Juggernaut's back, I reached into the device on my right leg and pulled out a small container, filled with a thick, off-white substance. I set that aside and then twisted the device, producing a thin hiss as the surface of my thigh split open to reveal two inches of prosthetic.

They're not made of metal; it's a special type of resin, with a stupefyingly high friction tolerance. We actually had to grow nerve tissue from samples of my own to transmit brain signals through the prosthetic and back to my leg on the other side. I just didn't want any metal in me; too much chance of overheating. I suppose that sort of paid off.

Not in the kick department, though. The prosthetic nearly caved when I kicked Broxigar. The damage isn't significant, but it's there, a small fracture on a connector piece. Good thing it didn't pinch a nerve or I'd have been screwed. Opening the white container, I dabbed a bit of the substance on my fingers and spread it over the damaged area. I haven't got the tools to fix it completely, but that'll hold it until the next time I have a chance to talk to Omicron. That done, I put the container back in the holster and twisted it back into place, closing the flaps back into place. Utterly seamless.

I took a deep breath and sighed. No more kicking things with my right leg for a while.
_______
<Sigma>

I whirled the band I'd been given around my finger, in deep thought. Do I roll with these people, or do I go off and do my own thing again? Being pinned down in one place has never really been my thing. And if I get to just teleport everywhere, what's the point of going places? The journey can often be more fun than the destination.

Then again, what exactly am I gonna do on my own anyway? Decisions, decisions...

<Beta>

It occurs to me that of everyone that went to Hybras, basically myself, Gamma, Orvtre and Rune are the only ones who AREN'T severely injured. Hero Squad member-wise, anyway. We appear to be a bit short on able-bodied personnel.

Well, okay, and Adaptrix, but he's not really... injurable, I guess. Still, combat-wise that leaves us with me, Orvtre, Rune, Adaptrix and Grav. I'm not counting Juggernaut because he really doesn't go anywhere without Quicksilver. I brought up that concern with Orvtre. He (she?) noted that there are some other recruits they've gathered, but agreed that more reserves couldn't hurt. I suggested Hydross, he's probably bored out of his skull at this point. I'm sure he wouldn't be too averse to some action.

Orvtre called Rune to come help with the recruitment, and to my surprise, Quicksilver and Juggernaut came out of their little hidey-hole to join us. I gave Quicksilver a quick look over.

"You're good to go after that leg injury?"

"Oh yeah, just pulled a muscle. I'm good to go and Juggernaut's getting antsy being cooped up in here," he rattled off nonchalantly. Orvtre gave him a quick look, but didn't say anything on the subject for the moment. I suspect they might be having a talk in the future, though. That said, I'll be happy to see the Pool again!
________
<Hydross>

Blessed, blessed silence. I very nearly kicked myself for merely having the thought, because even so much as thinking that is a good way to ruin it. Fortunately it seems nothing is going to-

"HIIII HYDROSS!"

GOD. DAMMIT.

Pinching my nose I turned to face the intruder on my nice quiet day. It's Chi.

"Please no," was all I said. He gave me an innocent grin, and I gave him a big frown in return.

"Actually I'm just waiting for the moment, nothing to discuss. Yet. Maybe earlier. Later. I meant later," he rambled, looking perfectly content with himself. I opened my mouth to tell him to bug off-

"HIIII HYDROSS!" came again, this time from directly around my neck. Namely from Beta.

God dammit again.

"You have three seconds to get off me before I start doing terrible things to you," I warned, and she was very suddenly off me. And standing next to two people I don't recall meeting before. And a towering Purple Pikmin who, after a second, I recognized as Juggernaut.

"If the crab dude shows up again, I'm blaming all of you," I growled moodily, crossing my arms.

"Aww come on, you can't tell me you're not bored out here all by yourself," Beta sing-songed. I glared at her.

"No. I was happy. It was quiet. It was peaceful. And then he shows up and that's always trouble," I snarled, jerking my thumb at Chi. He was still smiling innocently. "And then all of you show up and I can only assume that's even more trouble."

"Actually we were just here to recruit you," the cloaked one butted in. My frown deepened, if that was possible. I have a bad feeling about this.

"... Explain."

?-Orvtre-?

I started off the recruitment talks. "We'd like more people in Hero Squad in case some of our members are injured, and Beta suggested that you might be willing to do Squad stuff."

"Such as...?"

"Saving/protecting civilians, adventuring, or, if neither of the above two suits you, maybe guard work or just beating up villains. Or something along those lines," I elaborated.

"I kinda like the quiet I get around here. Also I don't think I'm really all that cut out for working with civilians," Hydross explained.

"We gave Grav a quiet room of his own. It shouldn't be much of a task to give you your own private, quiet room," Rune stated.

"You got Grav to go somewhere that isn't Dusty Desert? Color me impressed."

"... Could you explain exactly why you aren't good with civilians?" I asked the blue Experiment.

Hydross gestured towards his tentacles and his other attachments, stating, "... Have you looked at me? I'm a circus sideshow. I have TENTACLES growing out of my BACK. There's a SWORD in my ARM. There's a HORRIBLE PARASITE on my OTHER ARM. And did I mention the horrible stinging tendrils let off by the OTHER parasite on my neck? Oh yeah, total civilian guy here."

"... We aren't exactly 'normal' either, in that regard. I'd imagine that you'd fit right in," I noted.

"At least you LOOK normal. Again, I have a host of tentacles growing from my back. Doesn't exactly scream 'heroic'."

"To be fair, we DO know two horrible evil villains with tentacles on their backs," said Beta.

"SEE?!" exclaimed Hydross.

"Although their tentacles have things like syringes or creepy bitey faces on them. Yours don't!" Beta cheerfully pointed out.

Rune stepped in, with some words of advice. "Now, I am a new recruit here myself, so I can't comment much on the finer details, but... I recommend giving the various roles a try, and if you do poorly, blaming any poor performance on being a 'newbie'. Try acting confused if you screw up in front of civilians. From the information I have gathered, the civilians seem to be less angry at you that way. That should hold for at least a little while."

"I've been at this for ten years now, that excuse rings a touch hollow," Hydross pointed out.

"Ah right, you are not a newcomer to this land as I am. The first step is to identify how the civilians currently feel about you. Do you know that?" asked Rune.

"I believe 'hideous monster' is probably the closest. Not that I've done anything to dissuade that opinion."

Rune tilted her head. "Hmm?"

"Beta told me that Hydross was once a villain." I explained.

"Maybe you could try and improve the general public's opinion of you... ?" Rune suggested.

"I don't particularly care what people think of me. I live out here for a reason. Nobody to bug me except Beta, and she bugs me plenty enough as it is."

Rune held her head in though. "Curious. How did you get Beta to accept you after losing your villain status? That might hold the key to winning over the civilians."

"I didn't exactly put effort into that. I came to the Perplexing Pool, she followed me and then never went away. I've actually rather enjoyed the silence."

At that comment, Beta made a pouty face. I stepped in to continue the conversation.

"If push comes to shove, I can cast an aura that lowers hostility." I noted.

"I'd call it less 'hostility' and more 'oh god here comes that creepy dude again, quick don't look directly at him or he might eat you'. I MAY have helped that one along, though. A little. In my defense that Water Dumple totally had it coming."

This was when Chi stepped up to speak. "You could always just stick with the 'punching villains in the face' thing."

Hydross glared at the time-traveler. "Why do I get such a bad feeling when YOU enter a conversation?"

Chi shrugged. "I dunno, that sounds like a personal problem."

That was when I remembered something from a talk I had with Chi a while back. "Oh, right, you told me that we're going on a time-traveling trip sometime after we recruit Zeta. Is there anything that we should prepare for the trip, Chi?"

Chi gave me a confused look. "I did? ... OH RIGHT, I totally did. Um. A change of clothes would probably help. Warm clothes, preferably. You can never go wrong with warm clothes. Also some first aid couldn't hurt."

"Bad feeling getting worse."

"Also you wouldn't happen to have some tin foil, would you?" Chi asked me.

"Chi, you may or may not have told me that when your future self traveled back in time and told me that in the past. As for the tin foil, Mithril probably has some on hand; I suggest you travel a day or so into the future to ask her."

"Sweet, tin foil is always helpful for time travel. Keeps the things out of your brain parts."

"THIS IS NOT HELPING THE BAD FEELING. AT ALL." Hydross exclaimed. Quicksilver was content to watch all of this with a big doofy grin.

"Come onnn, what's the worst that could happen?" Beta asked. Hydross simply held up his reef spear in response.

"Oh right, with the exploding," said Beta.

Chi tried to reassure Hydross, saying, "I am ALMOST certain that the exploding won't be a problem. Almost."

"Hydross, you could still be part of the Squad by fighting villains. You still haven't responded to Chi's point there," Rune pointed out.

Hydross remained silent for a moment, before stating, "... Uuuugh. Fine. But I'm staying here in the meantime. Someone has to keep an eye on this place."

"If that's a 'yes, I'll join', then here's your Hero Band," I told Hydross, handing him the Band. "Now let's go recruit Zeta, team."

"One question, though: Where's Zeta?" asked Beta.

"Who suggested that we recruit Zeta, anyways?" asked Rune.

"Chi, could you look into the future to see where Zeta is?" I asked the cyan 'min.

"That would be cheating. Besides, I think one of your own members already knows," said Chi as he winked and vanished.

"Well it ain't me. Sigma suggested it, maybe he knows," said Quicksilver, answering Rune's question.

And that was when we went over to where Sigma was and asked him where Zeta was.

"Why am I not overly surprised that nobody else knows... well you're sure as hell not going there without me."

"Why did you suggest Zeta as a potential recruit, Sigma?" asked our resident magician.

"Because I visit him every so often, and I think I'm pretty much the only one that does. And frankly, I think he could use some more excitement in his life. Anyway, Alpha has him on a bit of a yearly routine, and this time of year, he'd be in Rocky Ridge. It's in the mountains not far from Wistful Wilds, a bit of a ways up. I'm gonna have to request that we climb the old fashioned way. Its part of the trip, ya know."

Rune was silent for a moment before continuing, "... Is there any particular reason why you're the only one who visits him?"

"Because Zeta's... not exactly a social butterfly, if you catch my drift. At least, not with anyone he's not completely comfortable with."

"Should I be concerned?" Rune asked Sigma.

"Not particularly. But I think your typical recruitment pitch is likely to annoy him more than anything. Just play it cool and I'll see what I can do."

"Since you seem to know him more than anyone else, I think you should take the lead." Rune advised.

"Sure thing. Also uh... try not to get too rowdy with the locals. Or they'll get rowdy back. You'll see what I mean," said Sigma, who gave a sly grin.
______
Father

Somewhere, deep underground...

Demetri struggled as he desperately tried to escape his binds. Here, in the elemental temple of darkness, a sinister ritual was taking place. This incarnation of Demetri, unlike the previous incarnation, was akin to the void, and was essentially a blank slate. A being without purpose.

The Galactic Gods were about to give him a purpose.

The being of darkness actually screamed as the ritual began, as he was impaled with multiple magic rods, which infused him with some kind of bizarre power. Followers chanted ominously in the background.

Demetri still continued struggling, to no avail. Taunts rang out, informing the elemental of darkness that all belonged to the Galactic Gods, and that he was no exception. Said taunts mocked his resistance, hammering home the futility of his actions.

Said struggles continued even as the ritual moved onto the next phase. Now, he would be forcibly fused with a Dark Seraphim. The Seraphim's name was Blood Moon. Once living in relative peace near Zankrieg, said Seraphim fled the area when the Black Pikmin went on the warpath. After being captured by the servants of the Galactic Gods, the Seraphim was brought here.

The purpose of the fusion was to turn the Seraphim and the dark elemental against each other, so that they would fight for control over the body. This would be enforced by the seal.

Demetri stopped struggling as the fusion ended, with him being tattooed with several bizarre, control runes, and having some kind of remote control mechanism attached to the end of his stalk.

Additional tests run show that, indeed, the brainwashing was successful. The light-wielding Corrector, who was powerful enough to capture Demetri by himself, kneeled before the Galactic Gods.

"My lords, thank you. If it weren't for your holy voices guiding me, I may not have succeeded in my mission," said the Corrector.

The Galactic Gods laughed. They have the Elemental Temple of Darkness. They have the current incarnation of Demetri. And they would soon have the world.
________
X-Pluto-X

After talking with his friend for quite a while, Pluto came to a decision. "Shadowmoon Sanctuary it is."

Kanaedolph and his team had already infiltrated Shadowmoon Sanctuary, taking out several guards. Ark'thugal and his team were on their way to the Sanctuary, but Pluto and his friend decided to teleport near the Sanctuary, sneaking into the location.

However unlikely it may be, Pluto and his friend decided that the Sanctuary might have clues to where Zankrieg's murderer was hiding. For now, before the main carnage ensued, the two Black Pikmin would sneak around to find clues.

"So tell me again, who leads this place?" asked Pluto's friend.

"Eranikus. According to the rumors, he's an old dragon with plant control powers," Pluto explained, searching through a wooden filing cabinet.

"What does he look like?" asked Pluto's friend.

"Well, aside from the dragon thing, he's on the larger side. Why are you suddenly asking this? Wasn't your modus operandi to shoot first and ask questions later?" Pluto wondered.

"Because some large old dragon dude just tangled me in tree," replied Pluto's friend. Pluto turned around to see a very displeased Eranikus.

"Oh hell."

/|\Ark'thugal/|\

Hmm, no alerts coming up as I approached. I'm not exactly inconspicuous, what with flying atop a huge undead wyvern. As I landed atop the city's front gate, it quickly became clear why. Namely, Kaneadolph lounging against the gate, balancing a dagger on his finger.

"You look like you've had your fun," I noted, eliciting a grin from Kane. "Well, now we get to have ours. Break open the gates. It's time to make some noise."

Kane jumped off the side and slid down the walls, making his way to the gatehouse to bust it open. I can already hear the rest of my Death Knights approaching. This is gonna be a hell of a bloodbath.

The gate shook as it began to swing open, and my wyvern once more took flight. I'd scarcely been in the air for a second when an earth-shaking roar split the skies, coming from somewhere within the city. There was very suddenly an awful lot of activity. I guess someone decided to blow the element of surprise. Good! More to fight. I had my wyvern blast a nearby house, its breath a freezing flame that gnawed at the tree. I guess I have some attention now.

"Hahah! More corpses!" I roared as my wyvern swooped between the trees, blasting its cold flames across the vegetation and bridges. The citizens, caught with their pants down, are terribly slow to rally. It'd be a shame to burn them all out in their homes.

That was when a stream of emerald flame burst from behind me. A few Green Pikmin are already on my tail. Good! Come to me, like lambs to the slaughter.
___________
>X<Cross>X<

Someone must have gotten to Sapphire before I did, because I see a trail of blood in the snow. Easy enough to follow. It shortly lead me to a nearly invisible cave, blending into the landscape so naturally that I doubt I'd have ever found it on my own.

The blood trail continued into the frozen tunnel within... a tunnel that suddenly became metal as I turned a corner.

"Hah, did I seriously just hit the jackpot that hard?" I muttered to myself, following the cold pathway. I eventually came to Sapphire herself, laying against a heavy door, blood soaking her dress. She gave me a hard stare as I approached.

"Aww. Let me get that for you," I hissed, yanking the door open and kicking Sapphire aside. And within...

Sterile and seemingly untouched, a large glass capsule with a machine and computer attached. Jackpot indeed. Oh, I am in the business.

Sidling up to the computer itself, I brushed my hand against it, looking for any obvious buttons. Fortunately for me, that seemed enough for the device to project something out into the air. A large whirl of symbols... and that's it. I stared at it for a moment, tilting my head this way and that. The image is fully 3D... and yet for the life of me I can't derive any meaning from it. I stomped around it back to the door, grabbed Sapphire by her stalk, and dragged her to it.

"What does it say?" I demanded. She stared at the symbols for a moment with glassy eyes, and for a second I thought maybe she didn't know either, that maybe this whole thing was a waste of time... and then she muttered something. I pulled her head up next to my ear.

"Now it makes sense," she whispered, and then grabbed the orb of energy at the end of my stalk.

PAIN..

I threw her across the room, but she landed nimbly on her feet. What the hell was that?

"I should have read this thing years ago," Sapphire exclaimed, and then charged at me with renewed vigor.

<Sigma>

Right so, tally of who's coming. Me, naturally, Orvtre and Rune, mildly disappointed that Mithril isn't coming but not as disappointed as the Crew is gonna be, Quicksilver and Juggernaut, which will be helpful with getting up the cliffside because like hell am I climbing this while wrapped like a mummy in bandages, Orbin wants to come because he's bored and Gamma was okay with it. Rho's still feeling under the weather so he's not coming, Beta decided to hang out with Hydross for a bit, who the hell knows where Chi got off to, and I think introducing Grav to the Crew would end extraordinarily badly. Far too much noise. Also my very own Mark II has apparently decided to join us for whatever reason.

So Quicksilver, Orbin, and I are chilling on Juggernaut's back while he climbs up the mountainside, Orvtre and Rune elected to fly, though I told them not to go too far ahead. Demon Blade hopped up the cliffs himself.

"So why the climb anyway?" Quicksilver prodded. I grinned.

"It'll give you a chance to maybe get ready for what's at the top," I said enigmatically, and left it at that despite Quicksilver and Orbin continuing to poke at me for answers. It's occasionally difficult to tell which is more childish... though I suppose I should be more disappointed in Orbin for it, considering he's older of the two.

It wasn't too long before I could hear the distinctive roar of motors. A wry smile crept up over my face as Juggernaut crested a ledge in the cliff... a decidedly not natural one. He and Quicksilver both looked around the ledge until, with a woop and a holler, a bunch of Pikmin burst out of a nearby tunnel, riding all matter of motor vehicles. Bikes, karts, trucks, you name it. Quicksilver stared for a moment as they passed... and then jumped off to race after them. I suppose that was too much to bear.

"Oh yes... I have missed this place," I said cheekily, my smile turning into a big, cheeky grin.
_________

"Who wants to try the new brew!" yelled a blue Pikmin, bursting out of the doors with a large stack of mugs between his arms. The calls for it were pretty much immediate. He handed the first mug to a Red Pikmin, who took a swig of it just as the giant Purple Pikmin came up over the cliff.

The Red Pikmin stared at Juggernaut for a moment, then looked back at his mug.

"I tell you what, Squid, that's some good ****," he said, then took another drink.

"Dude... I can see it too," said a Yellow Pikmin sitting next to him. The both of them stared at the mug and quickly came to a conclusion.

"So... it's SO good, it gets you drunk before you drink it," the Red Pikmin decided. Clearly this was the greatest beer ever made.

<Sigma>

"Okay," Orvtre said, landing next to me, "For all the hush-hush, this wasn't quite what I was expecting."

I'm sure Orvtre is referring to the massive iron ball, with a multitude of motor vehicles - and their owners - strewn about it, as well as a familiar-looking oversized backpack. A thin cloud of smoke can be seen drifting out of the top of the door to the ball.

I slid down Juggernaut's arm, and my appearance finally got some recognition. Namely in the form of shouts of "chrome dude!" A small crowd formed around me as I walked up to the doors fitted into the giant iron ball, a neon sign hanging over the entrance declaring it The Wrecking Ball. I slammed the doors open to get the attention of all within...

And was promptly greeted with a chorus of excited yelling. Oh yes I have missed this place. Rune made a face as soon as she walked through the door and promptly stepped back outside. I suppose the smell isn't for everyone. I heard someone mentioning to roll out a keg for Juggernaut. I'm sure that won't end badly.

Orvtre, at least, was brave enough to follow me inside, with Orbin following shortly after. Demon Blade took a look inside, then elected not to enter, despite a few shouts of "Another chrome dude!"

"Folks around here don't judge. Just don't touch their rides," I said, turning around to face the two of them and walking backwards through the crowd. I know exactly where I'm going, after all. Directly to the bar. I got a few mugs thrust in my direction, as well as a few playful jabs along the way. Fortunately the boys know better than to get too rough with me, especially in this condition.

Waiting behind the bar was a leather-clad, eyepatch-wearing, cigar-chomping Purple Pikmin, and the leader of this motley crew. You have one guess as to his name.

"How's it going, Wreck?" I said as I took a seat. He flashed me a huge grin.

"Man, you look like ****, Sig," he replied with a chuckle, sliding a mug over to me.

"As well I should, after spending time in the Hybras Colosseum."

A chorus of woops went up for that one. Wreck let loose a great big laugh.

"Poor suckers musta never known what hit 'em. You the champ, then?"

"Former champ," I said, and shocked silence descended upon anyone with earshot. Yeah, I bet that was a bombshell. A cough broke the silence, and the crowd's attention quickly turned to the Yellow Pikmin that had made it. A Yellow Pikmin with a spiked orb.

"You're not seriously gonna tell me that you lost a fight?" Striker muttered. I took a swig of my beer.

"By ringout," I replied, to a chorus of boos. Somebody flicked me in the stalk. "I know, I know, lamest way to lose. Rub it in, ya mooks. Anyway, where's Zeta?"

"Clearing the newest track out. Should be done within the hour," Wreck responded, blowing a puff of smoke. He switched his one eye to Orvtre and gave it an appraising look.

"So, who's the new fella?"

?-Orvtre-?

"Hi, I'm Orvtre. I'm one of the founders of Hero Squad, and we're here to recruit Zeta."

"Heroes, huh? What'cha guys do when you're not off saving people?" Wreck asked Orvtre.

"Hmm, we go off adventuring and fighting villains. Nothing too weird, though there was that time with Phi and the soda..." Orvtre replied.

"Something's bugging me," Striker muttered. "Who the hell would be strong enough to beat Sigma, anyways?"

"Oh, that'd be my friend Mithril. She searched all over the place to find Sigma and fight him. Considering the level-ups that she got from that trip, I understand why she's so enthusiastic about that," Orvtre explained.

"Curious. How'd that fight go anyways?" Wrecker wondered.

Orvtre showed Wrecker, Striker, and the gang a few snippets from the fight, including how Sigma looked after his loss to Mithril. This elicited a few shouts along the lines of "Woah, that dudette's made of chrome!"

"Damn Sig, you really looked like some major **** after that dudette was done with ya. Though I can kinda understand why she opted for the ringout option after you wouldn't stay down," Wreck observed.

"Where is Mithril anyways?" asked Striker.

"Mithril's taking a break for rest, recovery, and some other stuff," said Orvtre, before making a quick call to Mithril. "... Okay, status update: Mithril said that she might come over sometime later, after she gets some work done. For now, uh, beer I guess."

"Damn right! Squid, give 'em the good stuff!" Wreck hollered.

That was when the drinking began. Orvtre, now drunk, went into FRIENDSHIP FRIEND FRIEND MODE, singing songs about friendship, spraying everyone with pink rainbow friendship beams, and saying "LET'S BE FRIENDS" to just about everyone, including Sigma, Striker, and Wreck. There was also a lot of hug attempts.

And that was when drunken ghost Upsilon showed up.

"Dude... I see a dead guy... he looks like Striker!" exclaimed one of the Crew.

Striker promptly did a spit-take. "Since when could you astrally project yourself?"

Upsilon's response, however, was cut off by the drunken Orvtre, who began to convey the story of hir "fight" with Phi to the audience.

"So this Phi ninja-person person wanted to fight me. Fine-HIC. Yadda yadda I was drinking some SODA before the fight but NOOOOOOO Phi had to diss *HIC* and say that the *HIC* brand was better. It was ON then," Orvtre drunkenly explained. Whether or not this soda tale was true or just a deranged, drunken mis-memory was unknown.

"... I'd advise you not to get into an argument with Orvtre about soda. Weird **** always goes down when that happens," warned Rune, who was watching remotely from outside the building.

"And then we HIC blasted each other with super soaking SODA blasters and then and then HIC the whole arena got flooded with SODA and HIC I WON CAUSE FRIENDSHIP IS MAGICALLLLLLLLL and I blasted Phi with FRIENDSHIP SODA and some of the Hybras HIC people complained but it was all good because it was HOTTTTTTTTT in HIC Hybras and all the SODA EVAPORATED but then I did not get to drink any more SODA and I was sad. I FELT SADDDDDD," said Orvtre, who told the strange, strange tale of the soda fight with Phi.

The Wrecking Crew was captivated by this very bizarre tale. Orvtre continued on, stating, "And then Phi couldn't HIC drink SODA 'cause it 'vaporated and HIC HE SADDDD but then Chi came over dressed like the Soda-Aid man and gave us HIC SODA and we had a SODA PARTY. THE ENDDDDDDDDDDDD," explained Orvtre, whose tale elicited a round of applause from the audience.

<Sigma>

Striker gave me a sideways look. "Did any of that actually happen?"

"Well, it was certainly more entertaining than the way I remember it," I muttered, holding up my empty mug and staring into it to make sure there was nothing left before scooting it back onto the bar. It was refilled within a few seconds and scooted back, so I picked it up and moseyed outside to see what all the commotion out there was.

The commotion was, to the surprise of absolutely no one, a large crowd of Pikmin yelling "Chug! Chug! Chug!" to Juggernaut, who was doing precisely that to what appeared to be his fifth keg. The massive Purple Pikmin slammed the keg onto the ground (Not hard enough to break it) and let loose an enormous belch, knocking some of the crowd off their feet, though whether from the force or simply because they were drunk I'm not sure.

I made my way through the crowd to find Quicksilver, who was surrounded by a frankly impossible number of mugs and had himself a of awestruck onlookers himself. Even as I watched, he slammed back another mug and tossed it precisely to the top of the pile.

"Are... are you a wizard?" one of the crowd asked, utterly flabbergasted. Quicksilver just burst into a full on laugh.

"That cannot be healthy," I drawled, taking a sip from my own mug. Pacing is the key. Quicksilver blew a raspberry at me.

"Nah, my metabolism is so hyperactive it just burns through most of it before it can affect me. To get me drunk, you'd need more alcohol than it'd take to get Jugg drunk," he informed me, slamming back another mug. I rolled my eyes and wandered off to the garage, a clunky-looking but workable structure housing the Crew's rides. Their pride and joy. Anyone who wasn't actively engaged in drinking themselves stupid was in here, tending to their vehicle of choice. I made my way to the back, to something covered in a tarp. Setting my mug aside, I pulled the tarp off to reveal one very spiffy looking motorcycle.

Mine, specifically.

I don't get to stop by here all that often, but when I do I make sure to go for at least one race. It took me a few visits to build it up, but this bad boy has won me quite a few races.

"Is that-" "-one yours?" came two voices. I turned to find a bit of a surprise: two Pikmin, poking their heads out of a heavy-looking truck.

The surprise was that they were Black Pikmin. I blinked a few times.

"Who are you two?" I asked, swirling my mug around in my hand. The two of them tilted their heads, then turned toward each other and jolted like they'd just noticed the other was there. They both shook their heads.

"Sorry about that,-" "-allow me to explain," they said one after another. That's mildly disconcerting.

"I am First Word, and-" "-I am Final Word."

"You can think of us more like-" "-a single Pikmin with two bodies," they elaborated. I blinked a few more times. I knew Black Pikmin had weird powers, but this is something else. Once again the duo indicated my bike.

"Yeah, this is mine. You wouldn't happen to know where Zeta's ride is, would you?"

The duo pointed over to a very large, very heavy-looking box with a bunch of "Keep out" signs plastered to it. I snorted. Most people use tarps. Zeta uses a massive metal box no one else can so much as budge. Speaking of which, he should be getting back soon. Suppose I'd better go get a mug and find him.