parent opinion

'A woman wrote 117 reasons not to have kids. As a mother, this is my rebuttal.'


Here are 51 reasons you should totally have kids.

Whether or not to have children is a tough decision, especially when society is skewed towards expecting every woman of 'a certain age' to develop screaming ovaries and a sudden onset affection for all things pregnancy-related. And that’s when we get to make those decisions in private. 

But live your life in the public eye, and for some reason that decision seems to become everyone’s business, whether you like it or not. 

Ellie Gonsalves shared this week how her choices in the baby-making department - i.e. no thank you very much - have attracted a lot of backlash. But Ellie didn’t make this decision lightly. She shared 117 legit reasons she plans to remain child-free (my favourite was that her baby might eat its twin in the womb - something I had never thought of). 

And while I support Ellie's decision to make choices about what she does with her body, and I would never suggest someone should have a baby if they don't want to have a baby, I do want to point out a few reasons that having a baby is actually pretty great. You know, for balance. 

Watch: This glorious mess, little kids and big kids. Post continues below.

Video via Mamamia.

As a mum and step-mum of four, I feel qualified to speak on behalf of parents everywhere when I tell Ellie and her child-free mates what they could be missing:

  • People will give you their seat on public transport for at least a few months, if you stare at them and sigh loudly for long enough.
  • When someone asks you if you're pregnant, you'll know it's because you actually are, and not because a new YoChi has opened in your neighbourhood.
  • You can binge endless embarrassing shows without judgement because everyone else is asleep at 2am.
  • You can name your baby Exa Dark Sideræl, and then watch people's faces when you tell them.
  • You get sweet parking spots at shopping centres when they're not taken by some dick in a Beemer who has Very Important Business to attend to. 
  • If you want to leave any event, you can pinch your baby and then look really sad that you have to take them outside because they're crying.
  • Explosive poos make great stories at parties.
  • People start to leave you alone at parties.
  • People might even stop inviting you to their boring parties.
  • Small children swearing will never not be hilarious.
  • Your Instagram feed will be adorable, even if it in no way represents your actual life.
  • The Instagram corner of your lounge room will be your tiny sanctuary that doesn't look like a tornado has been through.
  • Prams are useful for shopping at markets, and for hitting people in the ankles until they get out of your way.
  • You get to meet strangers in shopping centres who give you helpful advice on your parenting.
  • You can get your boobs out in public and nobody is allowed to say a thing.
  • You get to strengthen your immune system because you're exposed to every germ going around at daycare.
  • You'll learn about the staggering array of small objects that can actually fit up a small person's nose.
  • Loads of hours of unpaid chore labour (even more if they're in trouble for something).
  • The opportunity to take out your childhood trauma on a whole new generation.
  • You get to go for ice cream more than an adult alone could justify.
  • You can explain mildly complex concepts and feel like a genius.
  • You don't have to worry about what to do with your spare time.
  • Naps.
  • You've got a genuine excuse for not fitting into your jeans anymore.
  • You've got a genuine excuse for your boobs looking like balloons three days after the party.
  • You've got a genuine excuse for leaving parties early.
  • You've got a genuine excuse for getting McDonald's on the way home.
  • You can order nuggets in any restaurant without judgement.
  • You can be a pretty average human and someone still thinks you're the best.
  • You'll never be lonely while using the toilet.
  • You'll never be lonely while showering.
  • You'll never have to have a regular one-on-one conversation with another adult, because you can always rely on the added spice of a third (and fourth, and fifth) person chiming in.
  • You can check under the bed and in the closet for monsters, and know with certainty that they are not there.
  • Bluey.
  • That hot new Wiggle.
  • If you want an honest opinion about your flaws (or even if you don't), you'll get it.
  • You can burst into tears any time you like, and nobody will ask why.
  • You've got someone to blame weird smells on.
  • You can learn fun home hacks, like how to get chewing gum out of carpet, and how to wash carrot-coloured chunder off wallpaper.
  • You get to colour in.
  • Kids have the guts and lack of filter to tell people what you really think of them.
  • You can go to Disneyland for your holidays without shame.
  • When people ask you what you've got on this weekend, you never have to sigh, look off into the middle distance and say, "Nothing".
  • You can spend a small fortune on Taylor Swift tickets and pretend it's 'for the children'.
  • Grade 3 maths the second time makes you feel like a genius (although grade 5 maths, not so much).
  • You're actually expected to have dark circles under your eyes.
  • Teenagers help you to become a better person by telling you everything you're doing wrong in your life.
  • You don't have to worry about where to invest all your savings.
  • You don't have to clean the inside of your car because there really is no point.
  • You can start an art installation in your laundry with all the single socks you now own.
  • You don't need to match a childless model's 117-strong list of reasons to not have kids because you've got school pick-ups to do and ballet classes to go to, and washing to hang out, and dinner to cook, and rugby practice to pick up someone else's kids from, because they did it for you last week.

Do you have any reasons of your own that you'd like to share? Feel free to comment below!

Feature Image: Getty Images.

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books

'I recommend books for a living. Here are 8 books worth the hype right now.'

Hachette Australia
Thanks to our brand partner, Hachette Australia

Reading is the vibe right now. In fact, it always has been, but there does seem to be a recent surge of people putting down their phones, turning off their tellies and picking up a good ol’ fashioned novel or non-fiction number. There’s something about it: it forces your mind to be transported elsewhere, away from the ongoing daily stresses of work and life, for that balance we’re forever seeking. 

That all being said, the book market can be an overwhelming place. If you’re not generally a big reader, you might not know where to begin. If you are a big reader, you might simply feel flustered by too much choice. I get it, I’ve been there. 

To make things just a smidge easier for you, I’ve gone ahead and plucked out eight titles that are getting a lot of deserved hype right now. No doubt there will be something amongst them that tickles your fancy.

The School Run by Ali Lowe.

Image: Hachette/Mamamia.

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Scandals, secrets, lies… say no more. Ali Lowe’s third novel is twisty and suspenseful, perfect for anyone who was a fan of Big Little Lies or Desperate Housewives. The story surrounds a group of parents in a coastal town as they prepare for the annual Gala Day hosted by the local boys’ school. When one boy is struck down by a hit and run, the entangled lives of three mothers begin to unravel.

This is the perfect book for anyone after something pacey and utterly compulsive. It’ll particularly hit home for any parent living in a close-knit community, but will be enjoyable across the masses.

A Brilliant Life by Rachelle Unreich.

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Holocaust stories remain compelling eighty years on, and this one is no different. Rachelle Unreich tells the powerful and inspiring true story of her mother Mira who survived several concentration camps before being freed in 1945. The narrative weaves together the past and present, from Mira’s story during the war to her battle with cancer. As Rachelle interviews her mother and pieces together the story of her life, the reader also learns about the powerful connection between a mother and her daughter.

For those of you who love heartbreaking, yet uplifting true stories, this one’s for you.

The Wake-Up Call by Beth O’Leary.

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You might recognise this author’s name and that’s because her novel The Flatshare was a huge bestseller (and still is). She’s back with an enemies-to-lovers romcom (my absolute favourite romance trope).This story follows Izzy and Lucas who are sworn enemies but are forced to work together at the front desk of the Forest Manor Hotel, a failing hotel that they’re both racing to save. 

It’s ideal escapism and perfect reading for this cooler, cosy weather that's setting in.

Unique by Jodi Rogers.

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Beloved star of ABC TV's award-winning Love on the Spectrum Jodi Rodgers shares her experience of working with the autistic community in which she has built a three-decade career as a disability rights advocate. Told through dozens of moving stories, Jodi calls for more inclusivity and explores the powerful impact of embracing neurodiversity and connecting with those around us. 

Ideal for readers who love something powerful, emotional and educational with a range of different stories and experiences.

Cool Water by Myfanwy Jones.

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For all you lit-fic lovers, Miles Franklin-shortlisted author Myfanwy Jones is back with a breathtaking tale that explores intergenerational relations, particularly those of fathers and sons. This story follows Frank who is celebrating his daughter’s wedding beside Tinaroo Dam — which has seen better days, much like his marriage and new business. As he grapples with the death of his father from the previous year and events from a long family history, Frank must decide if he can break free from the shadows of his family. 

This is such a breathtaking story, brimming with insight, and perfect for anyone who loves family dramas and the exploration of relationships. 

You Are Here by David Nicholls.

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This new love story by the beloved bestseller David Nicholls is one of first encounters, second chances and finding the way home.

Marnie is stuck; stuck working alone in her London flat, and stuck battling the long afternoons in a life that often feels like it's passing her by. Michael is reeling from his wife's departure, becoming reclusive, and taking himself on a lot of long, solitary walks. When a persistent mutual friend and some very English weather conspire to bring them together, Marnie and Michael suddenly find themselves alone on the most epic of walks and on the precipice of a new friendship.

It's such a tender, funny book that you won't want to put down.

Ripper by Shelley Burr.

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Fans of Chris Hammer and Hayley Scrivenor, or anyone who loves a small-town Aussie crime, will devour Ripper. The town of Rainier is still reeling from the murder of three innocent people that took place seventeen years ago. When a tour operator is killed in a copycat murder on Gemma’s doorstep, she and her police officer husband must face the dark past of the town and the people she thought she knew so well.

This is a richly layered murder-mystery, utterly compulsive and bound to keep you up at night – in the best way possible.

The Disappearance of Astrid Bricard by Natasha Lester.

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If you like a story that takes you back in time, then this one is picture-perfect. We follow three generations of women trying to prove themselves in their family’s fashion dynasty. It heads all the way back to 1917 in Paris, the 1970s in New York and into the French countryside in the present day. 

If you’re into gripping homage to women and fashion, look no further.

What new releases in 2024 are worth the hype? Tell us the books we missed in the comments below.

Find a book you'll love from Hachette Australia's collection of new releases.

Feature Image: Hachette/Mamamia.

Hachette Australia
We seek out the best stories. We nurture them. Then we share them. Hachette Australia is a team of expert publishers and passionate readers dedicated to discovering and supporting talented writers and working with them to craft exceptional stories. We select the very best, whatever the genre – from high-quality commercial fiction to literary award-winners, children’s picture books and adventure stories to memoirs and history, lifestyle and sport. And then we pour 100 years of publishing excellence into every page, bringing them to readers in the formats that they love.
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