Benjamin Ryan

, "Whatever Happened to Carpal Tunnel Syndrome?" has garnered me an award for Written Journalism from the American College of Occupational and Environmental Medicine. Many thanks to my very

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Benjamin Ryan

@benryanwriter

May 7

I worked the Met Gala as a waiter a few times. It’s your basic gala dinner. A lot of hobnobbing and table hopping. The placement of people’s tables is *very* political. The last year I worked the party Mary-Kate and Ashley were seated in Siberia and the were NOT HAPPY.

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Jane Marie

@SeeJaneMarie

May 7

What happens INSIDE the Met Gala? Is it just like a boring wedding reception?

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Sorry everybody about the #monkeypox outbreak! I'll do better next time. 🤷‍♂️

Benjamin Ryan

@benryanwriter

Apr 20

This is my cousin, then 16, mourning her best friend, Cassie, who was murdered 25 years ago today, along with 14 others at Columbine High School. The anguish in her voice before they found Cassie's body haunts me. My cousin would live a hard life. We lost her, too, in 2020.

I would once again like to apologize for inadvertently causing the entire global #monkeypox outbreak by typing too fast and leaving out a crucial consonant.

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Benjamin Ryan

@benryanwriter

Jul 20, 2022

Replying to @JLimHospMD

This is misinformation about #monkeypox. The outbreak is occurring almost entirely among men who have sex with me. Public health experts agree that sexual contact is the principle driver of transmission and have asserted that risk to kids remains *very low*.

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Also, Jimmy Fallon went around at the end of the night thanking all the waiters. Literally no one does that at gala banquets. He is a class act. Also, one time Kim Basinger made sustained eye contact with me and I nearly fainted from the glamor.

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Imagine as if Charlotte’s Web took a hard pivot and became a bloodbath in Chapter 2.

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Weren’t you in the room to begin with, making you one of the original 100 murderers? The question doesn’t clarify this.

When I found out during my sophomore year at Columbia that my mother had terminal brain cancer and soon would be dead, I went to the dean’s office to ask what I should do. She said I had 2 options: 1) Drop out and return another semester; or 2) Do all the work. I chose option 2.

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Aaron Sibarium

@aaronsibarium

May 3

NEW: The student editors of the Columbia Law Review have issued a statement urging the law school to cancel exams in the wake of the police operation that cleared the university's encampment, saying the "violence" has left them "irrevocably shaken" and "unable to focus."

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That's actually adorable.

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Mad respect for anyone who has ever suffered the indignity of working retail and has had to deal with rude and unruly customers.

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Someone give this child a Ted Talk.

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Today the federal government advised health insurance companies that they must cover pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP) against HIV with no cost sharing. That means that people on PrEP are not required to pay any copays or deductibles for the medication, labs, or office visits.

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and

This question is stupid! It's a supposed trick question, but the trick is that the question isn't posed with enough clarity to properly answer it. #fail

Breaking: Biden administration announces mass #monkeypox vaccination plan. The US will release supplies of Jynneos vaccine (which requires 2 doses 4 weeks apart): 56,000 doses immediately; 240,000 doses in the coming weeks; 750,000 by summer's end; 500,000 in the fall.

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Doesn't her being a TikTok influencer mean she isn't actually a housewife, but a working woman?

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Also, and this was at the NY Public Library for another party, but I was butlering champagne at the entry and I kid you not, a clarion call of trumpets sounded and moments later Martha Stewart entered. The following week, she was indicted for insider trading.

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Welcome to a proud club, young fellow! And don’t worry, the hair should grow right back. Last day of chemo on the left, five months later on the right:

"A federal judge ruled last night that the US Postal Service must give Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington documents about potential conflicts of interest by Postmaster General Louis DeJoy."

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Citizens for Ethics

@CREWcrew

Sep 7, 2021

Big Louis DeJoy news: citizensforethics.org/news/press-rel

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The only time I ever said yes to a guest asking if they could put their dirty wine glass on my tray of new, filled wine glasses (a MAJOR pet peeve of mine from my catering days) was to Claire Danes at the Met Gala. She was gorgeous and sweet.

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and

On a related note, Charlotte’s Web is one of the greatest books ever written and I encourage parents to read it to their kids. It teaches kids about the power of friendship, the meaning of a life that only lasts so long, and secular humanism.

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Eh, let's leave it. We all need a laugh.

Colorado Rep ⁦

⁩ recently expressed disappointment that she was not the number one person on the list tweeting the anti-#LGBTQ slur “groomer”.

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Tip: never ask a waiter with a tray of freshly filled wine glasses if you can put your dirty glass down there. Of course not! How do you think that would look? That’s what the drip tables are for.

I simply cannot believe that

@WashingtonPost

ran an oped by Eric Feigl-Ding about #monkeypox. He is not an expert in this subject and has already developed an egregious history of fear mongering and inaccurate statements about the outbreak.

Opinion | Let’s call monkeypox what it is: A pandemic

From washingtonpost.com

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I cried because my mother loved Tracy Chapman's cassette tape. We played it in the car when I was a kid and she played it in the kitchen. I’ve never stopped listening to the album. It reminds me of my mom. She died 25 years ago last week.

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The rich get richer because they have the *extra cash* to invest. Matt here is presenting these choices as purely discretionary, blaming the poor for spending their money unwisely. This despite the fact that the poor by definition don't have extra money to spend on frivolities.

Eric Feigl-Ding's constant fear mongering is deeply harmful. A new

@NEJM

#monkeypox study of 528 global cases found just 0.6% were from household transmission; 95% were likely transmitted via sex between men. nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-ou

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Trump: “They’re all saying, ‘What a great deal he made.’” Barbara Walters: [confidently, defiantly] “No they’re not.”

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When I was a kid, my mom didn’t have immediate access to a machine that, upon a frenzied impulse amid a torrential rage, would allow her to publicly humiliate me in front of the entire world.

Um, hello: x.com/benryanwriter/

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Merriam-Webster

@MerriamWebster

Feb 8

Who got that one typo tweet?

After the Covid vaccine came out, the adjusted excess death rate in Ohio and Florida was 43% higher among Republican voters compared with Democratic voters, this study found. There was no such gap based on political party before the vaccine.

Excess Death Rates for Republican and Democratic Voters in Florida and Ohio During the COVID-19...

Finally, Whole Foods has a Harry Styles section.

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One year Diana Ross sang and was very much not in key. That was distressing to me as a big Motown fan.

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Irish discipline is not to be messed with.

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That has to be fake. For one thing, he'd be violating HIPPA regulations about medical privacy were he to say this about a patient.

I'd never seen this 2013 article before. It asks whether the notion that Matthew Shepard was murdered for being gay was, in fact, a myth. That's me on the right in the picture, on the front line of a riot in Manhattan over his death in October 1998. I believed the myth! But after

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She has my deepest sympathies. Hinge is hell.

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The most degrading catering job I had was a fashion magazine launch party in ~2007. A model, probably high on coke, was flailing her arms near where we were exciting the kitchen. I tried to get her to move and she kicked me as hard as she could in the butt. Her friends all

My typo is teaching people about global pubic health! #monkeypox

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Freddy Gray

@Freddygray31

Jul 21, 2022

This must be the greatest typo ever.

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Okay, the South Koreans are clearly geniuses. This is the most clever idea ever.

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Drop tables.*

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The decisions people make with guns have ripple effects that extend throughout families and communities and across the years. The pain never ends. Cassie and my cousin, who thankfully had moved away in 1998 and wasn't at Columbine for the massacre, deserved so much better.

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Surprise, being LGBTQ does not simply boil down to sex.

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My favorite catering tale is from 20 years ago when Paris Hilton had just made it big. I was catering at furrier Dennis Basso's 5th Ave abode and people were complimenting Kathy Hilton on Paris in Fashion Week. "Well you know," Kathy said of Paris, "The camera is her orgasm!"

Elon Musk smears Twitter’s former head of trust and safety, Yoel Roth, by suggesting that Roth, whose PhD work at Penn focused on Grindr, supports pedophilia.

Benjamin Ryan

@benryanwriter

Jul 19, 2022

Hating Meghan Markle is a billion dollar industry. It will never stop. Too many people make a living off of it.

Benjamin Ryan

@benryanwriter

Sep 12, 2023

Wash U in St Louis just announced that its “physicians will no longer prescribe puberty blockers or cross sex hormones to minors for the purpose of gender transitions.” This after Jamie Reed’s accusations that the clinic provided poor care and a resulting political firestorm.

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Oh, and I remember that Christy Turlington was ravishingly beautiful.

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I thought he was the internet boyfriend. When and why did people turn on him?

State Rep. Jonah Wheeler speaks in the New Hampshire statehouse about why he decided to join 13 other Democrats in voting to ban gender-transition surgeries for minors. The bill passed by a narrow margin due to these Dems’ support.

From

Breaking: A paper in

finds that not only do people with HIV who are on antiretrovirals and maintain a viral load <200 have zero risk of transmission via sex, but there is a nearly zero chance of transmitting with a viral load <1,000. #IAS2023 #UequalsU

A year ago today, I tweeted this typo. The next day this screenshot of it went so bananas, my therapist started the next session saying, "Well, you're famous." I even got conspiracy theorists hounding me that I'd plagiarized the typo on purpose. The truth is I had chemo brain!

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Freddy Gray

@Freddygray31

Jul 21, 2022

This must be the greatest typo ever.

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I'm now officially a #cancer survivor. A CT scan taken 1 month after I finished #chemo for #testicularcancer showed no more signs of tumors. I have about a 5% 5-year chance of recurrence, and my oncologist says symptoms such as neuropathy should fade. My hair is even returning!

Benjamin Ryan

@benryanwriter

Jan 13, 2023

“Grief does not stop or go away in any sense, a year, or years after the loss,” she said. “Grief is something you will have to carry with you for the rest of your life, in spite of what certain people or our culture wants us to believe.” Lisa Marie Presley

Lisa Marie Presley Said She Was 'Destroyed' by Son Benjamin's Death but Kept 'Going for My Girls'

From people.com

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