Understanding Teenage Suicide

Suicidal ideation, sometimes referred to as suicidal thoughts, describes thoughts, fantasies, ideas or images related to dying by suicide. Contrary to common belief, depression and suicidal thoughts are not limited to adults, but symptoms and warning signs are often different in teens.

As a parent, caregiver or friend, the most important thing you can do to support a loved one who is struggling is to learn to recognize what suicidal ideation is, what it looks like in teens, and how to intervene.

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Passive vs. Active Suicidal Ideation

For teens, thoughts of suicide can range from fleeting to making actual plans to end their life. For this reason, mental health professionals discuss suicidal ideation in terms of being either passive or active.

Passive suicidal ideation about suicide includes experiencing vague ideas about dying by suicide. Suicide is viewed as a possible way to end the pain, but usually, no action is taken. Active suicidal ideation is when a teen experiences persistent thoughts of suicide and continues to feel hopeless. When the ideation is active, a teen begins to take steps to carry out a suicide attempt.1

Causes in Teens

Suicidal thoughts and depression often have many causes. Suicidal ideation in teens is often caused by untreated depression or drug misuse and always needs to be taken seriously. Social difficulties, stress, academic pressures, and other concerns facing teens may contribute to suicidal ideation.3

Other risk factors include:

• Bullying
• Health issues
• Lack of family support
• Physical or sexual abuse
• Poor social relationships
• Substance and alcohol misuse

Genetic factors can play a role in depression and suicide risk as well. Teen that experience suicidal thoughts are often more likely to have family members who have died by suicide.4

Warning Signs of Suicidal Thoughts

There are quite a few signs that your teenager may be experiencing suicidal ideation. Be on the lookout for:5

• Becoming extremely agitated, upset, depressed, and/or anxious
• Beginning to use alcohol and/or drugs, or using them more frequently
• Changing obvious characteristics of their personality
• Being self-destructive or engaging in risk-taking behaviors
• Changes in sleeping, eating, or other patterns
• Expressing hopelessness or a feeling of being trapped with no way out
• Extreme mood swings
• Frequently talking about death or dying
• Giving away possessions for no particular reason
• Isolation and withdrawing from social contact, especially if it's sudden
• Looking for and/or acquiring means to die by suicide, such as getting a gun or a lot of medication
• Making a point to say goodbye to people
• Saying things like, "I wish I were dead" or "I wish I had never been born"

Remember, warning signs can be different for every individual, and some teens keep these thoughts and feelings to themselves. If you feel like your teenager is showing any of these signs or are not acting like themselves, be sure to consult your physician as soon as possible.

An Example of Suicidal Ideation

Ivana, age 15, feels very sad when her best friend moves away and she experiences a deep sense of loneliness and insecurity. One night she finds herself thinking about suicide as a way to end the painful feelings she is having.

She pictures herself taking a bottle of pills and drifting into a deep sleep she will not wake up from. When she wakes up the next day her suicidal ideation has changed, she knows it’s an option but is feeling better and decides to call a friend she hasn’t spoken to in a while.

What to Do

If a teen is experiencing suicidal thoughts, there are steps that parents, friends, and guardians can take.

For parents:

• Be supportive, understanding, and nonjudgmental.
• Keep guns and prescription drugs away from children and teens.
• Know the warning signs of suicide and depression.
• Talk openly with your teen and let them know that you recognize their pain.
• Watch for signs of substance use and get help immediately if you suspect there is a problem.

Address Untreated Mental Illness

If your teen has symptoms of depression, anxiety, or another psychiatric condition, talk to your child's pediatrician. While most people with mental health conditions do not attempt suicide, having an undiagnosed or untreated condition along with other risk factors can make suicide more likely.

Never Ignore Suicide Threats

Don't dismiss suicidal talk as "typical teen drama." If a child is making comments such as "I might as well kill myself" or "I wish I was dead," you need to listen and acknowledge their pain. Let them know that you understand that they are hurting, you are there to offer support and you will help them get the help that they need.

Get Them the Help They Need

If you are a parent or guardian, talk to your child's pediatrician and get a referral to a professional mental health provider. Your child's doctor or therapist may recommend psychotherapy, medications, and lifestyle changes that can help reduce the risk of suicide.

If you are a teen and you are concerned that your friend is thinking about suicide:

• Take signs of suicide seriously.
• Encourage your friend to talk to their doctor or a trusted adult.
• Talk to a teacher, parent, or another adult about your friend and your concerns.

How to Deal With Suicidal Thoughts as a Teenager

If you are a teenager and are having suicidal thoughts, it is important to know that there are people and resources available that can help. No matter what you are experiencing or how you are feeling, you are not alone. 

• Take steps to ensure your safety: Ask an adult to remove weapons, pills, or other dangers from the house. If you are in immediate danger, seek help from a trusted adult such as a parent, family member, friend, teacher, counselor, or religious leader. You can also call 911.
• Talk to someone: Many people have experienced suicidal thoughts during their life. Talk about what you are feeling with someone that you trust. This might be a family member or friend, but you can also turn to your doctor, teachers, school counselor, or therapist. Experienced counselors are also available by calling a suicide helpline.
• Remember that your feelings are not permanent: While things seem hopeless in the moment, remind yourself that no feeling lasts forever. Promise yourself that you will give yourself time to seek help.
• Create a safety plan: Make a suicide safety plan that you can use if you find yourself experiencing active suicidal ideation. Your plan should include the steps you can take and people you can call to get help in an emergency.
• Care for yourself: Take steps to treat yourself with care and kindness. Make plans to do things you enjoy and give yourself things to look forward to. Reach out to people in your life to get social support. Self-care actions like spending time outside, getting regular physical exercise, and getting enough sleep can also help improve your state of mind.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, you should take them seriously. Try to identify the things that trigger these thoughts, care for yourself, and talk to someone you trust who can assist you in getting the help and support that you need.