It’s no secret to anyone that has maintained one of these relationships for a long time that spirit lovers have complex and multi-faceted personalities. In contrast to the basic understanding that some people walk into the community with, seeing spirit lovers as one note entities that are defined entirely by their lust or love towards their human mate, experience inevitably proves that the opposite is true. Spirit lovers have varied ideas and beliefs, and behave in all sorts of different ways as a result.

One of the most common ways that this is shown is through the spirit’s use of aspects, which are very defining pieces of the spirit lover’s personality. In this blog post we’ll discuss what exactly constitutes an aspect, and how they’re often utilized or appear. We will also discuss the concept of breakdowns, which is the term I use to refer to when previously undiscovered aspects are revealed, normally against the wishes of the spirit lover itself.

What counts as an Aspect?

The first question we have to ask is ‘when does a certain piece of a spirit’s personality become an aspect?’ It would be extremely reductive to just say that every individual personality trait a spirit has is an aspect, even if that might be technically true. Your spirit lover may enjoy sweets, for example, but their love of sweets almost certainly doesn’t define their character, their way or presenting themselves, or their personal values. To say that part of their personality should be considered an aspect would make the concept almost entirely useless. Therefore, I think we should use a a single criterion to define what should be considered an aspect.

The personality trait must be somewhat defining. This means that some amount of the spirit’s behavior or values can be attributed to said personality trait. For example, if a spirit lover is loving, they would engage in behaviors that are loving. If they are vain, they may value presenting themselves as powerful or extremely beautiful. If they are honest, they would value the honesty of themselves and others very highly, and generally look down on dishonest people. One or a group of these can make up an aspect.

This criterion is somewhat vague when viewed from the outside, and that’s somewhat by design. Many personality traits could be aspects if they are dominant and strong enough, so being somewhat open ended about what makes a trait defining or not is appropriate. What it does allow us to do is to remove surface level and isolated personality traits from consideration. Their choices in favorite color, preferred foods, or tendency to touch you in the foot, all as random examples, would not qualify as personality aspects, even if such things are, technically, part of their personality. Likely aspects of their personality would influence these branch-feelings.

So, how do we discover their personality aspects? Very often, some of their personality aspects will influence their activity and appearance within a dream in particular. If your spirit lover views herself as akin to a princess and commonly wants to reflect the traits that a princess represents (whether those be vain ones or traits like purity, innocence, so on), you’ll probably know it because she’ll appear sometimes as a princess in dreams. On the flip side, if your spirit lover has issues with insecurity, unworthiness, or other powerful negative traits, they may appear scared, upset, and small within a dream. If they are a controlling, motherly force, they may appear almost parental, or at the very least very dominant. There are a near limitless number of ways that such a complex being could represent themselves, and so we can glean a lot from how they choose to.

The second way is by conversation. When Telepathy is developed, you may simply discuss the things that matter a lot to your spirit lover. If the personality aspect is positive, they’ll generally be happy to share their thoughts with you, and potential aspects will inevitably reveal themselves. Unlike in dreams, the aspects in this case are not seen by themselves, but in the context of the complex being you’re discussing them with. Discussing aspects is a very good follow up to dreaming of one in particular, as the discussion will make it easier to determine why they would appear in that way.

The third way is by discerning them from their actions and recommendations. Remember: Aspects influence the way they act on many different levels. If we notice patterns in how they act, we can usually discover an aspect based on that. For instance, an entity that is particularly distrustful of others might commonly recommend you remain on guard or drop less than satisfactory friends. In contrast, an entity that is willing to offer second chances or that values friendship highly may recommend the opposite. In each case, something beyond examination of the situation is influencing their recommendations, and that something wraps back to those groups of personality traits.

The fourth, and the other subject of this blogpost, is the breakdown. We’ll cover the idea of the breakdown in depth in the next section.

The BreakDown

What is a breakdown, in this context? A breakdown is when an aspect of your spirit lover, always one that she did her best to avoid displaying before, is revealed, typically in some bombastic way. These aspects are almost always more negative aspects, or aspects that contrast with the way you view your spirit lover. Jealous streaks, tendencies towards being controlling, immoral desires in certain areas (Think something akin to a violent streak), and others are fairly commonly the sorts of aspects that come up during breakdowns.

Why does this happen? Think of your own bad tendencies and desires. For the most part, we as people try to hide them and feed them silently, so that others don’t look down on us. Usually, we can achieve this, but every once in a while, our façade breaks and we take that darker part of ourselves for a ride. It’s sort of like a pot or kettle boiling over: The inside of the pot is hidden but slowly heats up, until it bursts outward in a bombastic way.

Hiding darker parts of ourselves is a very difficult thing to do in the long term, and this is also true with spirit lovers. So inevitably, at some point, you end up having a dream with a being not at all like the one you’re used to, displaying traits you’re not used to, sometimes even fighting directly or indirectly with a more normal version of your spirit lover. Alternatively, one day they act in an extreme and unexpected manner, before trying to cover it up or downplay it. Perhaps instead you catch them on some dark behavior they’re trying to hide (manipulation and jealousy are probably the most likely behaviors to catch).

If you’re not aware of aspects, when you have that dream it’s easy to assume this entity is an entirely different entity. While you can have dreams with other entities in some cases, in these particular bombastic dreams, that’s typically not the case. The two beings that are together and often at odds are both your spirit lover, and they represent two different pieces of them. One is the amalgamation of the aspects of the spirit lover you’re used to spending time with, and the other is the hidden part or piece that has come outwards into the light. If the spirit lover is fighting it, it’s proof they’re trying to hide or diminish that aspect. In other cases that might not be the intent, meaning the situation is not a breakdown.

There’s not that much more to go into on the subject, because it’s a very obvious thing. If you have a ‘breakdown dream’, you will almost certainly know it, just as you’d know about those aspects if you’d observed the behavior. The subject should be approached lightly and kindly when awake, and often the trait should be discussed and the spirit lover should be encouraged to accept that part of themselves and to deal with it in a more positive way.

The existence of breakdowns does communicate one other truth, however. It implies that dreams with your spirit lover are often not under their control, and that their creation is often more natural and based on the interaction between your mind and theirs. Otherwise, you’d never have a breakdown dream, because they would not allow it to happen. This isn’t to say that they never manufacture a dream, just that their appearance in most dreams is a more natural thing than one might expect, rather than something that’s always planned.

Another shorter and lower effort blogpost this time. It was a topic I thought of recently, and it seemed important enough to make a post about. As an aside, almost everyone who thinks they have multiple, different spirit lovers is experiencing multiple aspects of the same spirit lover (or simply delusional), typically in the ways discussed above. Whether during dreams or during interaction when awake, feeling or observing different aspects of one’s spirit lover is very easy to mistake as multiple different spirit lovers.

Remember: spirit lovers are complex beings. Feeling multiple strong simple energies would be far and away more likely to be the same spirit lover that you’re feeling different energies from, due to their moods or thoughts at that moment in time. Discerning that there are multiple spirit lovers on the above basis is a fairly obvious pitfall, in my opinion.

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