Kaille Marie

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

School counselor in Tokyo, Japan. Home schooling graduate. Atheist. Feminist. Cat and birb mom.

She/Her

Tokyo-to, Japanpluscachange.wordpress.com2017年1月からTwitterを利用しています

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Kaille Marieさんのツイート

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

18時間

There was a full month where the only reason the world knew North Korea’s Kim Jong-un was alive was because South Korea said if he was dead, they were relatively confident they would know. A MONTH.

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Padma Lakshmi

@PadmaLakshmi

· 10月3日

A team of doctors obfuscating & concealing the truth about a leader's health is a common occurrence in authoritarian regimes

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

10月2日

I MADE FRIENDS TODAY!!! I! HAVE! FRIENDS!

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

10月1日

I really want to read THE EDGE OF ANYTHING but Amazon no longer accepts my Japanese cards so I can't buy it for kindle. Not sure how else I can get a legal, digital copy for my kindle...

返信先:

さん

Giuliani, here he goes again: He’s just making stuff up as he goes...

#ByeRudy

@RandyRainbow

#RudyColludy #tbt

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Randy Rainbow

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sgt balls: nazi hunter

@Barknado69

9月29日

the job hunt is going well

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お疲れ様。My cute yellow bike finally broke so badly it was cheaper to replace than repair. So now I have Chai. Short for “Mama CHAIri” but also it’s tea colored.

I liked my old basket better so I had them switch it.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月29日

Successfully deceived the post office into mailing my grandad’s masks by airmail by fitting them and a card in a small envelope and telling them it contains a card and origami. Those masks are totally folded, okay.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月28日

My health check results came back. I’m “obese” at 172cm, 80kgs.

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月28日

So... I don’t know how many people know this, but #USPS is not accepting EMS or airmal parcels from Japan. At all. Anything that isn’t a paper document has to go by surface, which has no tracking, no insurance, and can take up to 3 months. Are other countries restricted?

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月27日

Today I tried a new mask pattern and made 2 for myself (top) and 2 to send to my grandad (bottom.) these are way easier to make than the other kind I was using! It’s the “3D mask pattern” from seekatesew.com, I highly recommend it!

Open for a surprise

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月25日

Student: So what do YOU watch when you need to cry? Me: Violet Evergarden absolutely destroyed me over quarantine. Student: I just finished Banana Fish. Me: My deepest apologies. Student: Thank you.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月25日

THEY CALLED ME BACK IN TO SAY THEY WERE OFFENDED I IMPLIED THEY SHOULD HAVE ALREADY KNOWN I’VE LITERALLY GIVEN 2 PRESENTATIONS ON THESE FILES. When I said “I take what you put in the incident report and add it to the file” WHERE DID YOU THINK I MEANT?

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

· 9月25日

Management just tried to imply I’m sloppy in my record keeping. Why? Because they forgot our safeguarding records exist. Literally looked me in the eye and said “I couldn’t find any info!” The file is clearly named, organized, and updated. It’s been shared with you for a year.

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月25日

“Well I must not have access.” Showed them the file permissions on my phone. They have access. “They’re kind of scattered.” Me: tbh I’m not sure how much more organized they can be than “all in 1 folder that’s clearly named”?

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Kinda wish so many freedom seeds weren’t flying out of anger pipes into people’s thinky coconuts and organ barrels and making their loved ones leak so much boo-hoo water out of their peep orbs.

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NRA

@NRA

· 9月21日

Ammo Sales SURGE 139% That's a lot of freedom seeds.

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月24日

This is from our Head of School.

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Charlotte A. Cavatica

@cavaticat

9月22日

it’s soup for my family

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I went off my ADD med (with my doctor’s knowledge) just to see if I could function without it. I went on it for the first time in grad school, but I thought maybe I could cope without now that I’m long done. 7 weeks later TURNS OUT I STILL NEED IT.

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Fund planet parenthood

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Star Stuff

VOTE

@RachelTortorici

· 9月18日

Jupiter, high on caffeine, sleep deprived, and doing its best to take care of 79 moons

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月17日

I don't understand why my coworkers dislike one specific dude in management. He's like. The only one that's sane and reasonable. When I've taken teens to talk to him, he's literally only ever been understanding and supportive. Big "dad" energy that they respond really well to.

bffs

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and I just went, "She absolutely can, but she's a stubborn kid and you need to be clear and firm. She's testing you, that's fun for her." I think now they've seen she's basically a normal kid, just one without words, they're going to try harder to include her in the class.

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When I finished the activity and everyone was getting their stuff together to go home, her teachers were looking at me like I had done magic. They had no clue she could sit in a circle with everyone and participate with the same amount of engagement (more than some others, tbh)

Then during the circle time activity, when it got to a part where the kids had to offer their opinions on something, I asked her (in front of everyone, clearly) "I know you like playing games; good friends play with each other, right?" and wrote "My friends play with me." [...]

went from "LOL" to teary eyes and sad noises, so I said, "You chose to sit in a chair. I don't mind if you come back to the carpet, but you need to sit, okay?" and held my hand out. She came back and sat nicely and I told her she did a good job, then sat down next to her. [...]

so I went to her and said "You have 2 choices: you can sit nicely here like everybody else, or you can sit in a chair over there." She continued flailing on the floor, so I took her hand, got her standing, and led her to the chair. She sat in it and IMMEDIATELY [...]

Today a happy tale! I was teaching a lesson in the class with my non-verbal kid. She was rolling around on the floor making LOOK AT MEEEEE attention seeking noises when we were TRYING to have a group carpet discussion [...]

Today I accidentally let my class out 15 minutes early. I’m trying not to beat myself up over it since it’s the first time I screwed up the time table (I’m really bad with them) but damn do I feel stupid.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月14日

Teacher: This 5 yr old has major anger issues and speech delays! He shouts everything, doesn’t follow directions, and gets in fights with friends! Me: Did you check his hearing? Teacher: Me: Teacher: Me: Yeah maybe ask mom to get his hearing checked first.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月12日

Friday broke my heart for a lot of reasons, but one of them was definitely gently explaining the cycle of abuse to someone suffering through it and having them very quietly say, "I already knew that, deep down." Ouch. Been there.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月12日

I’m getting a health check for the first time and one of the questions on the intake form was “Have you gained more than 10kgs since you were 20?” I’m struggling to understand the purpose of this question.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月11日

—rooms where people had died/killed themselves. His writing is almost always about death/dying/suicide. He admires it. He romanticizes it, glorifies it. But he’s “fine.” I hate this country sometimes.

CW // suicide Teen w/ideation for nearly 7 years got a Dr’s note saying he has no mental illness whatsoever. He was diagnosed with ADHD 9 years ago, so I’m not inclined to trust them. Also last week he asked if for his 11th grade work experience, he could be a cleaner for—

It’s been 13 years since my bipolar diagnosis and somehow I never learned the words “affective storm” to describe my weird emotional overload meltdowns? This whole time I thought that was a subcategory of my panic disorder! Nope! It’s the bipolar disorder!

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月7日

Forward plans are due Friday and I still haven’t been taught to do them. I have 9. At the end of the term, I’ll have to report on 120 primary kids and 35 secondary kids. Oh, and also be the school counselor for 260ish students.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月6日

We don't require compliance because we value autonomy. If a kid doesn't want to do the thing, they express it, teachers support it, kid finds alternative task to do and we all move on with our day. Teaching them they don't get to refuse is sending a weird message about consent.

The intervention specialist at a former student's new school in the US asked me "This past school year, were there concerns with aggressive or noncompliant behavior?" and I have spent two days trying to find a nice way to say "Compliance should never be an educational goal."

(It helps that this child is absolutely hysterical to me, she's very playful and mischievous and quite a riot when you spend some time with her, but I knew her before this school so I'm probably biased. XD)

They were practicing shushing her and I went "she's literally having speech therapy 3x a week, maybe discouraging her from trying to communicate is not the most helpful thing?" If you can "understand" a baby and "understand" your dog, you can understand this 6 year old.

Like. She doesn't even really interrupt you, she comments when she wants to comment and you just need to think about why for a second, acknowledge her point, and move on. Most of the time her noise means I DON'T WANT TO and they you go "Sorry, you gotta," and then she does it.

I spent like 2 hours yesterday pointing out to 2 teachers that their non-verbal kid, aside from being non-verbal, is by far not the most difficult kid in their class this year and that as long as they treat all her various calls/sounds as communication, they'll be fine.

返信先:

さん

I think abusive behavior from friends is something we virtually never talk about in our culture. I had a "best friend" in middle school systematically break down my self esteem in a way that took years to recover. I still saw myself as fundamentally a sidekick well into college.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

9月3日

Every time, I'm heartbroken. Every time, I ask the caseworker to try and find the new school. Every time, I wonder if there was a way to do this that doesn't end with the child just falling through gaps I can't cover. I'm frustratingly, maddeningly limited. I hate it.

There's no accountability. There's no logic. There's no real attempt to ensure safety, only what amounts to a pinky promise they won't beat the shit out of their kids just because they were asked nicely to stop. And all it takes to make that go away, for the abuser, is to leave.

Even worse, the caseworkers are reassigned every fiscal year, in April. The offices are by ward, so if the family moves around March~May, and then leaves, there's no follow-up. The trail goes cold. I have personally been the one to inform a caseworker "we already told you this"

And so far, six kids I've called child services for have withdrawn from the school. Six. What we were told was that if we knew their new school, we could pass on what we had, but usually we're not told.

But there is a pattern of parents, abusive parents, pulling their kids from the school when we report them regularly (AS LEGALLY REQUIRED OF US.) I have everyone's caseworker's names and numbers in my records. I keep in touch. I update them and ask for updates.

We as a school have a legal duty to report abuse. It's not a duty we were terribly good at before I came. I made our records, I collected information to put in them, I wrote out our procedures and policies, and I make sure we report EVERYTHING.

Instead, third week of August right when school's about to start? She withdraws him from the school. Previously, she had strongly indicated she felt having an English education was vital for him. Now, she's putting him in a Japanese Junior High.

Child abuse does not affect custody decisions in Japanese family court. I guess they think it's better to live with a mother that beats you than a father that works. We spent all summer trying to help this kid meet with his caseworker away from his mom. No luck.

She would scream and scratch him. She told him she wished he would leave. He actually tried, several times, to run away to live with his father (who is not abusive) but due to Japanese custody laws, his father can't take him in until he's 15 and legally chooses his dad. He's 13.

A teenage boy, victim to his mother's physical and mental abuse since he was small, disclosed in great detail what she does to him. When we reported it and child services investigated, his mother admitted she used to hit him, but "only" throws things at him now. Like scissors.

He said they'd "argued" so he "made it up". Never mind the scars on his body, the multiple disclosures, the verification from neighbors that they heard him crying often. His case was closed. The day before we returned for the new school year, his mother submitted his withdrawal.

His caseworker called us because they had tried to visit, but mom wouldn't respond or open the door. They called her daily, but she never answered. Finally, at some point in July, she drove him to the main office of child services and had him recant everything he'd told them.

The next day, mom called and said she was too worried about COVID and was keeping him home. The day after that, we went on winter break, which turned into SOE, which turned into being out of school from the 3rd week of February until the last 2 days of May.

We reported it, and I sat with the boy when the caseworkers came to interview him. He asked them to delay coming to talk to his mother by 1 day because he wanted to tell her himself that he wanted her to stop beating him. This was the last day we saw him. Ever.

One boy, 11 years old, reported to his home room teacher that his mom had been beating him for about three years. She would throw him out of their apartment and lock him out when she was angry, and didn't let him back in even if he cried or it was night time.

The abuse I see the most is physical abuse by single mothers towards their children. I'm sure there are lots of factors leading to this, and I'm not unsympathetic towards the plight of single Japanese mothers, but they need to stop beating their children. Their kids are not okay.

TW // child abuse I need to get this out because it's killing me. This is a thread about what has happened when I report abuse. It's a pattern and I hate it.

Glad to see the pattern of speaking in Japanese and being answered in English as a form of belittlement goes all the way to the damn top.

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引用ツイート

The Mainichi (Japan Daily News)

@themainichi

· 9月3日

Minister under fire for questioning foreign journalist's Japanese at press conf. 　 mainichi.jp/english/articl

Like this tweet if you have never made more than $400,000 in a year. Retweet it if you’ve never made more than $100,000 in a year. I’m just trying to see something real quick.

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Irish Music Party.

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Στεφανία

@skamiotis

· 8月31日

I think we should just go by the definitions of our names instead of our actual name so please only address me as Crown Light from now on

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月31日

Is there anything more infuriating than a grown adult who refuses to accept even PARTIAL responsibility for ANYTHING they do?!

Mitch McConnell has been blocking $25 billion in funding for USPS for 104 days & legislation to restore Voting Rights Act for 264 days

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The Mets and Marlins took the field, had a 42-second moment of silence, and then walked off. The only thing left on the field: a Black Lives Matter shirt.

SNY

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月28日

I’m 32 years old but somehow being snubbed at lunch and eating alone still hurts like hell.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月25日

Today when the primary teachers found out that I was given zero guidance on what/how to teach, only that I had to, they were confused why I'd been told to when I have a whole other job to do, but also VERY helpful and arranged things in the easiest way possible, I'm so grateful.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月24日

They’re refusing TEMPERATURE CHECKS now?! They really want to kill people, wow.

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Benjamin Young Savage (ᐱᓐᒋᐱᓐ)

@benjancewicz

· 8月24日

Not wearing a mask is now a religion

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月24日

"Last year you spent a lot of time putting out fires." "Yes--" "This year is about prevention!" THINGS ARE STILL ON FIRE THOUGH? ARGUABLY MORE SO SINCE THEY HAVEN'T PHYSICALLY ATTENDED SCHOOL SINCE FEBRUARY?

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月24日

Today I cried 3 times with 3 different teachers because I'm just so overwhelmed with being told to teach across the entire school with no experience in this curriculum, just because the office doesn't think I should spend so much time counseling. I'm a SCHOOL COUNSELOR.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月21日

Dog eat Dog Eat Dog

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Elle "Fire Mime" M. (they/them)

@ellle_em

· 8月19日

Oh my God

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Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月20日

Got my new visa. It’s another 1 year. My ninth 1 year in a row. I’m upset.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月19日

Today in Terrible Hot Takes: Me saying 1-on-1 counseling students is more important than me teaching general health & wellbeing lessons at my school is like saying BLM more than white lives, when they should be equally important. ????????

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84 years young today! Wishing a very happy birthday to the incomparable computer scientist Margaret H. Hamilton.

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Good news, I don’t have nail cancer! ...Yes there was that potential!

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月18日

The way this anime makes you fear FLOWERS—

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holly @ DOH GRIND

@yunalesca

· 8月5日

while we may be getting a remake of higurashi no naku koro ni, never forget one of the most iconic anime openings, stan eiko shimamiya xoxo

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月18日

Me: You’ve booked me for teaching during my counseling time. Managment: You can meet them during lunch then. No, I can’t. My lunch time is only interrupted by actual emergencies. It is not “free work time.” It’s my break. You suck at scheduling.

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月17日

I reported my old ID as missing yesterday at the koban, then called immigration today. They said as long as I bring my passport, the piece of paper from the koban, and the postcard from immigration, I can pick up the new one! YAY!

Kaille Marie

@kaillemarie

8月16日

My ID and health insurance card escaped my wallet and I have no idea where they are. I've checked every place I've been in the past 3 days, no luck. My new ID is ready to pick up, but will they just give it to me, or do I have to get the old one reissued just to punch a hole in?

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