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Smegmagistrate
Smegmagistrate
1.2万 ツイート
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Smegmagistrate
@PickleRick1488
I love cold clammy clay
Smegmagistrateさんのツイート
you know why it ss called snail mail ? cause it goes WAY. TOO. FUCKING. SLOW!!!!!!!!! LAZY ASSHOLES!!!!! 

#SaveTheUSPS
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ahahahahahah this ssi what you get fuckers bending a vinyl record i ordered in the mail now theres a giant seam right down the middle wouldnt even FUCKING play at all this is akrma and you know jt. sucks to suck bitches!!!! #SaveTheUSPS
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i rip ass.....Tha Whole World feels tha tremors
demons are pussies for only showing up metaphysically because they know that if they have physical bodies then they will also abide by the laws of physics, ie my shotgun i keep behind drywall being able to carve a hornets nest into it's chest. "go to hell" I would say.. lol
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not real dumbass
引用ツイート
Buitengebieden
@buitengebieden_
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A myoisin protein dragging an endorphin along a filament to the inner part of the brain’s parietal cortex which creates happiness..
You’re looking at happiness.
メディアを再生できません。
再読み込み
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if I met someone wearing an arm cast I'd write the n word on it in permanent marker
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delight , simply delight !
メディアを再生できません。
再読み込み
さんによる
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reddit mods when cuties is on netflix
メディアを再生できません。
再読み込み
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You are now sneeding manually.
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Over 20 lbs of pussya nd ass
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just scammed some stupid old bitch out of her life savings 

think I'll spend it all on weed and guns
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another day, another 1,000,000,000,000 pushups 
maybe a challenge tomorrow?
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I <3 SNEED
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mom says it's my turn to be niggas
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fuck cyberbullying w eare cyber rayping in 2020
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stripping completely naked except for my socks and brand new Chuck Taylor All Stars every time I go to shit
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neon gaysex evangelion
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i'm that keanu chungus type nigga
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my catgirl maid doesn't understand the concept of keto and frequently gets mad at me for refusing to eat carb heavy meals she cooked
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"Sneed is Chuck. Feed is Seed. Fuck is Suck." -George Orwell, 1984
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im a nigga that breathe dirt
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mailing a letter to the neighborhood schizophrenic that just says "look outside" every 3 weeks
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completely preparing myself and my home for any potential life threatening hazard then getting final destinationed into breaking my neck trying to suck myself off
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the virgin jelq vs the chad stick your flaccid penis in a taffy stretcher
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my rank ass balls smell like skunk
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goofy goober hypno
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if I had the death note I'd always write down AIDS as the cause of death so when the police perform the autopsy everyone thinks they're gay
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I love my wife shes great
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just took a bubbling green frothing witch's cauldron shit
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oh.....cool.....I just made ANOTHER 60 million dollars from my career as an entrepreneur
yeah its uh *smacks lips*....its real cool
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looks like it's national kick a ginger day or as I like to call it every day
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in DIRE need of head
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weed mindset
Susan B Anthony? More like Women B Shopping!
In the desert you can remember your name
Cause there ain't no one for to give you no brain
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sometimes I remember brazil is an actual country where people live and all I can do is laugh
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BREAKING Trump moves to pardon me for ripping ass at the dinner table
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OK
OK
WHO'S THE WISE GUY WHO THOUGHT IT'D BE FUNNY TO SMEAR CUM ON MY BOOGER WALL
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free bobby shmurda!!!!!!
引用ツイート
TheSharpEdge
@TheSharpEdge1
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BREAKING: POTUS announced to the press pool on AF1 that he plans to pardon someone "very, very important" tomorrow, but that it will not be General Flynn or Edward Snowden.
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very much lvove the monkeys so funny my favorite
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I will receive 100% of the black vote.
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Works at - The Gay Sex Factory
Graduated from - Being Gay University
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looks like team rocket's busting off again
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my whole room's a dog gone mess !
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rt if u agree
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thats my secret cap I'm always in derp nigga mode
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Sequel to Super Size Me called 'Feminize Me' in which Morgan Spurlock spends a month eating impossible whoppers for every meal to see if it makes him trans
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NO ONE TOLD ME ALBANIANS WERE REAL 


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I am a SCHOLAR you are NOTHING you are an ANT compared to me
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wearing my JNCO jeans.......the babes are inbound
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I am the strongest being
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why do the minecraft 1.17 patch notes just say "Added George Floyd to the nether"?
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hmmm I'm a real cutie huh ? lol
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I have the Gift of Gab
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neverland is just Little Saint James
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hshut the fuck up. its lookijng like a gay parade with all these different colored fucking pills you keep telling me to take. Fuck off
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who did it? WHO INVITED A BLACK TO MY MINECRAFT SERVER?!?!?! THIS AINT GONNA SLIDE
big chungus dies at the end
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look all I'm saying is, if I were in shinji's position, and Asuka was calling me a pussy, smacking me around, disrespecting me? I'd beat the shit out of her. I'd mash her face into pulp. Cause I'm not a pussy, I'm not a bitch, I don't take that kind of crap from anyone. Nobody.
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hm. yea. ok, cool. see, I just got a call from "Robert Q. Fuckass", very obviously someone's real actual name but uh, you wouldn't know anything about that huh? would you?
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I smell like tobacco and piss
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micordosing huh? when I light weed its a MEGAdose no less......
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proud to say my Swag is now Epic
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