>>814735535Aww dude you really shouldn't beat yourself up like that. There are women out there that will treat you right, that will not shy away from things that may be unfamiliar to them. It takes a bit of searching, but you can find a nice person who won't judge you for it.
As for the commands, not everyone is going to follow them. I do wanna preface this by saying Bdsm is not about controlling your partner, but about working together. The dom has no power if the sub does not give it up to them. The sub must consent to being dominated.
That being said, my dom would start off really simple, just by asking me to take off my clothes first. He might ask me to do it in a specific way and put on a show for him. And as time goes on, the commands ramp up a bit more. I always have the option of tapping out if I'm uncomfortable with something. I'd suggest reading some articles online about bdsm, there's actually a lot that goes into it. There are plenty of books and even full on courses, because it's really important that people realize that its about consent and not control.