Sachiko Ishikawa

(I’m not even going to argue or justify my identity as a Japanese woman. I’m a Japanese woman. Don’t like? I give zero fucks)

I was bullied from elementary to high school irl. Online, I’ve been a feminist account here on twitter for the past 2 years. I’ve had my share of criticism, insults, rape and death threats. I’ve watched accounts bully, harass, and doxx other feminists.

On short, I’m used to gratuitous abuse. From classmates, to acquaintances, to strangers. I’ve been told to stab myself and film my death so others could masturbate to it. I might get upset or annoyed, but I’m rarely shocked anymore.

Read that again: I’m rarely shocked anymore. Do you know how fucked up that is? I’ve just shared a website where people said I needed “five shots of .38 Special” (whatever the fuck that means). And I’m unmoved by the contents of those messages.

You know what actually horrified me? How little I care. How common this is for me (and so many other women and minorities). How fucked up is it that *this* is the norm?

I’m 31yo. I’m a grownass woman with traumatic experiences behind me, GAD and BPD. My CV is stellar. I’ve published books. I’ve been quoted at the NYT and interviewed at BBC radio. I’m loved by my family and friends irl and online. (Yes, I’m bragging.) I’m so fucking happy now.

So these comments? They do not undervalue who I am. I do not base my worth on strangers’ distorted perceptions of me. I give zero fucks. But I’m 31yo. I have friends and family who love me irl and online. I have a stable job. I am fortunate.

So many people out there do not have this safety net that I take for granted. What I can brush off, others might not be able to for whatever reasons—I don’t need to know what they are, I just know they are valid just as every single one of you is valid.

This is why *I’m* speaking out about this. I don’t give a rat’s ass about a weeb’s tears, but insecure teenagers might not be so lucky. Someone vulnerable might not be so lucky. Someone, anyone, might not be so lucky.

(Do not get me wrong: I am not brandishing my privilege to say “you’re not strong enough to beat this,” my intention is to use it so that, if you can’t, you *don’t* have to. I hope this is clear and I apologize if it’s not.)

My point is: stop bullying. You don’t know who’s at the other side of the screen. Words that are explosive might trigger someone’s death: you need to take responsibility. Online bullying is real, and it’s 2019, and I’m so fucking over this. Nobody deserves this. I don’t, either.

Online bullying is real, it’s a problem, and we as a society need to be better. If you’re not partaking in online harassment—congratulations. But if you find it (and you’re in a good place emotionally) jump in and stop it (irl or online).