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  1. Jan 23

    I’m really sorry about your problems with Volkswagen. I’m more sorry about the fact that I know your personal business because you take calls in a doctors office waiting room on speakerphone

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  2. Jan 13

    Also that was supposed to say “Woodpeckers”

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  3. Jan 12

    Everyone keeps telling me to talk to my son. I have no idea what to say to a newborn. So I’ve been reading him random animal facts. So when he tells your kids that a hummingbirds tongue wraps around its brain, you’re welcome.

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  4. Retweeted
    7 Dec 2018

    I’m putting my name in the “hat” to host the awards this year.

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  5. Retweeted
    4 Nov 2018

    Alright Alex how many retweets for you to take my senior pictures with me? 😭

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  6. 24 Sep 2018

    If that had been Brady or Ben they wouldn’t have picked up the flag

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  7. 23 Sep 2018

    When you fly you never know if you’ll have a pilot or not!

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  8. 13 Jul 2018
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  9. 29 May 2018

    Sadly, I though Rosanne and Rosie O’Donnell were the same person.

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  10. 15 Feb 2018
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  11. Retweeted
    26 Nov 2017

    no way Jimbo is leaving FSU. Please retweet when I’m wrong about this.

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  12. 17 Nov 2017
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  13. Retweeted
    16 Nov 2017

    M-V-P!!! Nobody more deserving than you!! Congrats on an unforgettable 2017!!

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  14. Retweeted
    1 Nov 2017

    It’s AND Fernando Valenzuela’s birthday. So we’re giving this sick card away. RT for a chance to win.

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  15. Retweeted
    27 Oct 2017

    Retweet for your chance to win a pair of tickets to Game 5 on October 29 courtesy of .

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  16. Retweeted
    21 Oct 2017

    🚨 GAME 7 GIVEAWAY 🚨 RETWEET this by 1pm for a chance to win a pair of tickets to tonight’s Game 7! 🚨 THERE WILL BE TWO WINNERS 🚨

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  17. 9 Oct 2017

    Breaking news The Green Monster is going to be repainted this offseason to become a giant mural of

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  18. 30 Jun 2017

    50% off code: N4SNQDR5. $95 after code to get a robotic vacuum cleaner, link:

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  19. 14 Jun 2017
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  20. 1 Apr 2017

    Hanging out at the Barrow anniversary party @ Barrow Brewing Company

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