I just ask my wife's son to open them for me, or her other boyfriend when he is sleeping over.
Do I just have strong hands or something? I have no problem with the new bottles.
Some batches are worse than others. My last batch was incredibly difficult to open, and I'm the dedicated Jar Opener of the house.
I can double overhand deadlift 405 and do 20+ pull ups, climb a rope with no feet and have removed callouses while trying to open these god damned bottles, this is my last fucking order
Lmao maybe cut down the soy young lady 😂😂😂😂
They’re really hard to open, im afraid of ripping skin off my palm , and gotta be extremely careful when opening, or else squeezing it to hold it still could make it explode..
Soft girlish hands here, no problems opening the new bottles, it's all in the technic
I think the problem is that I have super soft skin. I'm a grown ass man but it's at the point of harming my skin from abrasion.
You might be male but you are definitely not a grown ass man.
> grown ass man
> afraid of hurting his soft skin from bottle caps
They're easier to open than the old bottles. You don't even have to mess with any plastic. This subreddit needs to bust out some deadlifts.
drinking soylent will transform your once male body into a weak male/female hybrid body, this may be why you can not open a lid.
$2.37 with free shipping from China if anyone wants one
alternatively: any piece of cloth for $0.
Are you saying you don't use an electric knife to cut your bread?
I use a precision, military-grade laser to both slice and toast my bread simultaneously.
elastic bands, hot water, and wrist curls are all much cheaper.
Are you saying you run the caps under hot water every time you want to open one?
You are a hero.
You are a pathetic excuse for a man. Work the fuck out. Christ.
Just tried my first soylent today and yeah it was hard as fuck to open. Also, I was hungry quite quick after
Drinking water helps. Also, the hunger may be surfacing because you're expecting it or paying more attention than usual. Keep with the routine and the feeling should subside.
or maybe cause you had a shitty chocolate drink with some fake vitamins instead of real food, you fucking pigeon.
Pigeons can survive more than 30 years in the wild.
Yeah these new bottles are a bitch, I have a callous from them already
> I have a callous from them already
good, you might harden up a bit
Just ask your wife's boyfriend to open it for you.
Good commercial. Enjoy your fagmilk, ladies.
Memes really write themselves in this sub, huh?
Lol at not being able to open a PLASTIC BOTTLE. Even children can do that.
Marketing opportunity here soylent!
At this point I think they should be sending bottle openers to all their subscribers for free as an apology.
I honestly hate using the word "unacceptable" but it's pretty fucking ridiculous that my wife can't open a bottle of Soylent without help. How did these bottles/caps get through QC? Did they not even test samples or what?
RL seems to overcompensate. Bars make a few people sick? Scrap the whole thing! Mold in the bottles? Make them impossible to open!
I just use one the those sheets of silicone meant for gripping jar lids. It works well, and you can find them for next to nothing at almost any grocery store.
I have my wife open the jars for me but she drinks milk so🤷🏼♀️
It’s almost like being a soy boy makes you weak
Omg I just looked at your post history and SEXIST, RACIST AND HOMOPHOBIC! Don’t feed the trolls soyfriends!
And yet people wonder why the term soyboy is used
It was real. I thought it was an edit or something
I also love this one https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ
I bought one of these same bottle openers and the rubbery plastic got shredded trying to grip the bottle top. ...just like all the skin on my hands.
Why the fuck is there a whole reddit for consuming soy products? Like I’m a pretty level headed guy, I try to take a gray stance on things before being called a [REDACTED] but this is fucking insufferable. Even the first comment was mocking this soy boy for being a cuck and he didn’t even have the fucking balls to dispute it.
Jesus fucking Christ, this is why the Chinese are beating us.
This is so gay. You sissies must be real proud of yourselves. Please never have children.
Keep the bottom of the bottle flat on a rubber or non-slip surface and push the neck down. The bottle suddenly becomes much easier to open.
Hahaha you can't even open a fucking bottle? Go to the gym or something dude, if you're a man don't bother calling yourself one.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
This is why you need meat and an actual workout so you can open a plastic bottle
Maybe if you ate real food you wouldn't be such a weak fuck.
holy shit this is real I thought this was a fake screencap from other sites
My gf usually opens mine lol, before you judge me, they're tough to open!
Holy kek why don't you just ask your wife's boyfriend for help
You could have just asked your wifes boyfriend to open it for you?
If you don’t have a Soylent bottle opener...The best way to open those tight bottles, take a sharp knife (and please be careful!) and pierce the top of the bottle. As the top of the bottle is pierced you’ll begin to hear the pressure release and then try to open the bottle. You’ll find it’s much easier to open.
I usually just get my wife’s boyfriend to open them for me while he’s over, but nice bottle opener. Keep chugging the girl juice my man
Maybe if you stopped drinking so much of it, you'll actually have enough muscles to open the bottle.
Limp-wristed redditor reminds us about the dangers of soy. CUCK !
Holy shit I didn't think this was a real post lmao
Adam Davenport #Can'tOpenHisOwnBottles.
i never realized until now that ted kaczynski was right
I usually ask my wife’s boyfriend to do that for me
Drinking soy, and you can't open your own shit? Bwahahhaha. This is so sad and pathetic
Where'd you get this? I can't seem to open mine so I usually ask my wife's boyfriend if he can open them but I can't when I'm at my gender studies class
Are you guys like special or something?
The pathetic, limp wristed soyboy meme is real!
It's because all the soylent is turning you female.
This place is full of a bunch of fuckin soy boys.
Then why the hell are you here?
First warning.
To laugh at the weak
Good question, I'll see myself out
Lmao, dude gave you a first warning like your in preschool my dude!!!
When you’ve consumed so much soy you can no longer even open your bottles of soy. This is some sponge bob squarepants levels of bitch fingers.
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