The Cube Rule

of Food Identification

first, we asked:

 

are hot dogs sandwiches?

Classic Sandwiches

New York said yes.

This bulletin explains what is a sandwich hot dogs and sausages on buns, rolls, etc.

then,

pop tarts are a kind of ravioli.

the wars began

excuse me, ravioli are a kind of pop-tart

The Sandwich
Alignment Chart

 

tried to bring order

The Sandwich Alignment Chart

but only chaos ensued

my wife left me because I think a burrito is a sandwich

then spake

the holy prophet

@Phosphatide

are you unsatisfied with current debates regarding what is or is not a sandwich?

blessing us with

the grand unified theory

of food identification

The Cube Rule

The Cube Rule of Food for identifying dishes based on starch locations

① Toast

cube with bottom face solid

① Toast cube with bottom face solid

popular examples

a pizza

pizza

a piece of nigiri sushi

nigiri sushi

a slice of pumpkin pie

pumpkin pie slice

② Sandwich

cube with bottom and top face solid

② Sandwich cube with bottom and top face solid

popular examples

a piece of lasagna

lasagna

(multi-decker)

a toast sandwich

toast

(made and photographed
by me, Ryan. it was okay)

pieces of a quesadilla made from two whole tortillas

quesadilla

(non-folded)

③ Taco

cube with bottom and two sides solid

③ Taco cube with bottom and two sides solid

popular examples

a hot dog

hot dog

 

a sub-style sandwich

sub sandwich

(uncut)

a slice of cherry pie

slice of pie

(taco on its side)

④ Sushi

cube with bottom, top, and two sides solid

④ Sushi cube with bottom, top, and two sides solid

popular examples

a falafel wrap

falafel wrap

two pigs in blankets

pigs in a blanket

an enchilada

enchilada

⑤ Quiche

cube with bottom and all four sides solid

⑤ Quiche cube with bottom and all four sides solid

popular examples

a hot dog

cheesecake

 

a sub-style sandwich

soup

(in a bread bowl)

a slice of cherry pie

falafel pita

 

⑤ Quiche cube with bottom and all four sides solid

bonus round

a hot dog

deep-dish pizza

 

a sub-style sandwich

salad

(in a bread bowl)

a slice of cherry pie

key lime pie

 

⑥ Calzone

cube with all six sides solid

⑥ Calzone cube with all six sides solid

popular examples

a hot dog

burrito

 

a sub-style sandwich

corn dog

 

a slice of cherry pie

pie

(whole)

⑥ Calzone cube with all six sides solid

bonus round

dim sum dumplings

dumplings

 

a frosted strawberry pop-tart

pop-tarts

 

a smuckers uncrustable, with one bite taken out

uncrustables

(unbitten)

Additional Cube Rulings

⓪ Salad

cube with all six sides empty

⓪ Salad cube with all six sides empty

popular examples

a grilled steak

steak

mashed potatoes

mashed potatoes

fried rice

fried rice

⓪ Salad cube with all six sides empty

bonus round

a bowl of spaghetti with tomato sauce

spaghetti

 

a dish of poutine

poutine

 

a bowl of tomato soup

soup

(a wet salad)

Muffins

or other blocks of starch


are type ①, toast

(in raw, unsliced form)

Rice

You are free to interpret the
nature of rice however you wish.

Vanilla Soy Latte

A three-bean soup.

Thank you.

References

made with 💖 by @indirect

🍞🥪🌮🌯🥙🥟🥗