全 51 件のコメント

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 37 ポイント38 ポイント  (21子コメント)

Now, I get to decide if I want to go to his bullshit party.. (being miserable and only thinking about how fucking high the grass is)

I remember the first time I decided I wasn't going to go hang out with the in-laws for some bullshit "just because" get together. This is a family that is stuck in a rut, always go to the same mediocre restaurant, same place after, same cheap cake if it's a birthday, same jokes, same sibling drama between wife and hers. I like my in-laws enough, they're alright people. Just not my idea of a fun outing. So I said no, I'm going to stay home and get some work done.

Ya know what happened?

My wife started screaming at me, went through the gamut of manipulations to get me to change my mind. My FIL even called me to chew me out and say that family is important and that he's disappointed in me. Wife's siblings sort of awkwardly ignored me from then on, and I could tell that the dynamic had changed and they would never see me the same way again... - - -

Wait, no. None of that happened. In fact, nothing happened. I stayed, she went, she came back, we had sex later that evening. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. As does a man with a backbone.

[–]Grapedrink27 16 ポイント17 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I remember doing something similar. My wife's aunt likes to just randomly drive from her hometown to ours without telling anyone and everyone is supposed to just drop everything and have dinner the next day.

So one time it happened again and I had a long week and wanted to stay home and take care of some shit and just relax. Wife tells me aunt is in town and we should meet her the next day. I flat out say "No." I was fed up with her aunt's rudeness and didn't give a fuck. Wife was mad, went, came back, apologized and has never asked me to go to those dinners unless she gives proper notice. This was actually still before I found RP, but didn't make the connection.

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Ironic how growing a pair makes you an "asshole" but also makes you attractive.

[–]discobolus_ 14 ポイント15 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Wife used to tell me "Just don't go then" when I would bitch about having to do some BS in laws get together. But I was too smart for her....I suspected she was going to hold my absence over my head, so I went anyway. Then I'd be pissed for "not getting any credit" when she wasn't showering me with gratitude that I went.

Fuck man, I look at the stuff I used to do and realize that if I squint a little bit, wife was practically holding up a sign telling me how to not be a bitch. I always ran the other direction.

[–]Tebulus 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Its really interesting that women generally want you to succeed and be the man they want to fuck maybe to confirm their own beliefs about their ability to choose good mates maybe because theyre cool people. Every other new guy writes a story and mentions their wife/ltr/plate whatever sometimes find a way to communicate to the cuck the behavior that they are attracted to and want to see without acting like total cunts while doing it, and until said new person calms the fuck down and stops ramboing they realize that the captain first mate dynamic comes pretty naturally and the first mate is jumping up and down screaming about the correct course of action to take. Instead of just listening during that rambo or first phase, they treat it with a little too much suspicion to the point of utterly rejecting any and all things their first mate say.

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Passing fitness tests is the single most mindblowing, counterintuitive thing we can do. And that's why sad men who don't know the game think women are so confusing.

[–]DeathToDadBod 22 ポイント23 ポイント  (1子コメント)

This is definitely main stay America now. After finding the red pill I refuse to watch these shows. They only remind me of how screwed up we have all become. The treky in me is flipping out at Captain Kurt it's Kirk please edit.

[–]Omnibrad 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (0子コメント)

My dad didn't let me watch The Simpsons when growing up because of how Homer was portrayed. I don't think he saw what was coming. That show is over 20 years old now too.

Now I can hardly watch fiction.

[–]Grapedrink27 16 ポイント17 ポイント  (7子コメント)

I used to watch Everybody Loves Raymond as a teenager and while I found some parts funny, I was always bothered by how much of a wimp he would act like with his wife. He would never stand up to her even when she was being a bitch. I'm sure it had some effect on me.

Great post.

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (5子コメント)

I love watching Friends. But sadly, the dudes in there are painfully beta. Except Joey. He's a natural.

[–]The_LitzMRP APPROVED 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (2子コメント)

But....but... Chandler got Monica right?? So being such a faggot must count for something?

An alternative, closer to reality, storyline would have Chandler filling where Joey's been driling.

It's all BS in the end anyway.

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

And I was more drawn to the nerdy Ross getting superhot girl next door Rachel (Jennifer Aniston? Yes please). I think the more pathetic the man, the louder the cheering when he finally wins in the story. Like I said, it's an escape.

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

What they don't show is how the sex life died after the kids arrived.

Shows are great at portraying only the fun parts of relationships. Never the part where you have to fight becoming a boring schlub. It's the reason sitcoms like that are so successful: they allow the viewer an escape from reality. By definition, they cannot depict reality. That wouldn't sell.

It's almost like I could watch a sitcom and then do the opposite.

[–]GargantuaBlarg29MRP APPROVED 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (1子コメント)

How you doin?

[–]alphabeta49MRP-APPROVED 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Classic.

I've gotten to a point I never thought I would. After I swallowed the pill, I used to hate Friends. The guys were weak, the girls were hypergamous, it was all fake anyway... I was angry and couldn't stand it, like lots of the guys here are saying.

But I don't really care anymore. I watch Friends because it's a great way to provide comfort with my wife (she's a big fan too). Some parts are truly hilarious, and the painfully cheesy parts we make fun of. And it gives me an opportunity to have a nice running Red Pill commentary with my wife.

[–]GargantuaBlarg29MRP APPROVED 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I haven't tried it but heard if you go watch Doug, the cartoon that played on Nickelodeon, you'll think he's such a weaksauce faggot and simply needs to grow a pair, bang patty, and punch Roger in the jaw.

[–]Red-CuriousMRP APPROVED 11 ポイント12 ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's probably worth remembering not to try to fake-alpha things.

For example, beta-me would have told my wife, "You go to little Johnny's birthday party and I'll cut the grass," and then would have done a quickie job cutting the grass and spent the rest of the time lounging around the house in my underwear until about 10 minutes before I thought she'd get home. Sometimes I'd even fake-alpha instruct her, "Call me when you're on your way home so I can start getting everything ready for kid #2's basketball game." In reality, I was telling her, "Give me a warning so you don't see how pansy I'm being."

Then, when she comes home and sees that I've been home for 3 hours and the grass is mowed, but not great, I didn't weed whip, didn't take out the trash, probably straightened up the living room but didn't vacuum or dust, etc. ... she's thinking (and some cases bold enough to verbalize): "What the heck have you been doing all day, you lazy turd?"

This is why the OYS stuff is so essential, and I've only been really engaged in that aspect of things for the past few months - not enough time for her to notice (she has been super pregnant, so there was an implied understanding that I'd pick up the slack while she was incapable, and still is for another couple weeks in post-c-section recovery).

I was too beta to answer, "I took some me-time." Instead, I'd DEER, "Well, the lawn-mower was acting up, so I had to spend some time looking at it and cleaning out the old grass; then a neighbor stopped by to chat; then this and that happened." Most of it either wasn't true or was exaggerated ... but even if it was completely honest, it was a horrible answer that only came off as excuse-making.

[–]justpickanyusername 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I did the same thing with calendaring a few months ago after starting MRP. I have had good success with just using our smartphones. There are plenty of apps that can do this for you, but we just use iCloud calendar to keep a family calendar and it is always in sync with both of us.

In the past, I would use statements like "Well, I've got to check with the boss before I commit to anything" when talking to other people about setting something up. I used to think that I was being cute and funny to whoever I was talking to. Most of this was because I would plan things only to have the wife say that we can't do it because we are doing such and such. I had no clue what we were doing and what was upcoming on the calendar even though she probably did tell me.

Now, I can just look at the calendar and schedule something because I know it is open. Plus, I know what my kids have been doing, who my wife is babysitting, etc. which increases my level of engagement when talking about things.

[–]The_LitzMRP APPROVED 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Sometimes it is the small details we miss in leading, which comes naturally to some and has to be 'learned' by others.

Language is a huge thing. There is a big difference between

" I think we need a new lawnmower"

and

"I am buying a new lawn mower for next season"

[–]PersaeusMarried - MRP Approved 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (0子コメント)

or,

her: "what happened to the old lawn more"

me: "i bought a new one"

her: "blah, blah, blah"

me: nothing, can't hear her over lawn mower

[–]weakandsensitiveBlue Pill Ipecac - May induce victim pukes 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (1子コメント)

You guys ever make suggestions that aren't suggestions? Like an exec that says "here's a direction I think we should consider going".

Something to chew on. Remember, 70% of communication is non-verbal.

[–]The_LitzMRP APPROVED 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

The non verbal aspect is actually huge. Asserting dominance in a situation is often 100% non-verbal and just posture and body language.

[–]screechhater 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is all in the sidebar

Why does it become relative ? especially with a cape ?

FYI read MMSLP it lays out (even for the fucking retarded) how to simply lead a few 8 year old girls, relating to the making a decision for the wife

I buy the vehicle my wife drives, I pick it up and deliver it I will not go through the bullshit test drive shit Guess what ? she loves all the vehicles I have bought

I make all the money decisions, guess what ? We always have hoards of cash. When I tell her not to spend, she listens

[–]emiruE 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Can you please stop making wrong star trek analogies? Also his name is fucking Kirk and Spock has been in command of the Enterprise a thousand times. kind regards, a female.

[–]CapNBalls 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

2) Get a Dry Erase Board Calendar

Adding to this: I have different colors of markers for marking things that are specific to each person like work schedules, gym schedules, family events, etc. They all sit right beside of the fridge on top of the microwave in some faggy ceramic owl cup thing along with an eraser, and it makes it a bit easier to see what's going on when things start piling up a bit.

As an aside, I also have two other whiteboard uses. One is to just keep an ongoing shopping list of anything we need so that anyone in the house can write something like "AA batteries" if our jumbo pack is almost out, toilet paper, etc. The other one keeps up with what leftovers are in the fridge along with the date they were put in there. When I take off the trash, if there's something that's been in there more than a week, it gets taken out, taken off the list, etc. Plus, we always know what's in the fridge without having to open it.

[–]Tebulus 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Holy shit, point 3. My dad did this incorrectly and inconsistently and it still helped set the tone for the duration of my childhood that he is the boss of all matters even if I did not always respect him. I would not classify my dad as RP in any other way, still to this day. Also, I am going to buy a replica longsword.

[–]Westernhagen 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I realized that my problem was that I never knew what was going on that week or weekend.

That's why we put EVERYTHING in the Outlook calendar and the reminders pop up on the phone. Too easy to forget stuff that isn't on the phone calendar...

[–]TomHicks 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I started doing Sunday night family meetings. I make everyone sit on the couch. I grab my kid’s ninja turtle sword and wear a fucking superman cape.. It frames you as the LEADER. At first, this will backfire very badly.. wife will roll her eyes, kids don’t know what to think.. You’ve been drunk for so long what do you expect them to think? I start off with a little pep talk. Tell them that there’s only 3 weeks left of school, to finish strong, etc.. I then let each person say what’s on their mind or ask a question – but only if they are holding the SWORD. I pass the sword around the room and they take turns.

LOL. This is like the 'talking cushion' episode of Breaking Bad.

[–]jonknownothing 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Captain Kurt?????????

[–]WerewolfBillionaire 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

The calendar was key for me; Google Calendar, one for each family member. It isn't happening if it isn't on the calendar as far as I'm concerned. Everyone in the family can have situational awareness if they bother to refer to the calendar. I schedule stuff then tell my wife, if she has issues we can discuss.

It's low hanging fruit for taking charge, surprised it isn't mentioned more.

[–]JDRoedell 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

The calendar is key. We have and use one.

You've laid out good, concrete actions for new guys to take in the quest to regain control of the helm.

[–]I_pace-around_ -4 ポイント-3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Soo sitting at a table and having family meetings makes you a STRONG fucking MAN? Who gives a shit about any of that? What about doing something completely adventurous and thrilling and INDEPENDENT instead of posting all over the internet about what fucking CHAIR you have to sit in?