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We will miss your badassedness, Mr. Shaub

Walter Shaub, the director of the Office of Government Ethics, finally had his fill of Donald Trump, the Trump family, Donald Trump’s shady excuses for ethics, Trump’s shady businesses, the Trump family businesses, or pretty much anything with a T and ending with an ump, and has submitted his resignation effective goddamn immediately July 19. Shaub, who has been trying to get Trump to conform to even the most rudimentary of ethical standards since Trump arrived in Washington, finally got tired of being the canary in the ethics coal mine, so he cheeped one last time and keeled right over:

That was a pretty nice letter, considering all he could have said. Hell, he’s been saying it all along, for all the good it’s done. He called — repeatedly — for Trump to divest himself from his businesses and place his non-Trump-branded assets in a truly blind trust. He pointed out that, no, it’s really not the job of White House advisers to plug Ivanka’s crap clothing line. He is apparently going to spend at least the first few days after leaving the Office of Government Ethics at a dermatology clinic, having the imprints of a brick wall smoothed out of his forehead.

Shaub told the Washington Post that he had not left under any pressure from the White House or the Trump administration, and if there’s anyone whose word on that we’d trust, he just resigned. As the Washington Post put it (rather delicately, we’d say),

But the ethics chief said he felt that he had reached the limit of what he could achieve in this administration, within the current ethics framework.

“It’s clear that there isn’t more I could accomplish,” he said.

Ever the gentleman, Shaub apparently got through the interview without using the word “weasels” even once. He’ll be taking a job as senior director of ethics at a good-government nonprofit, the Campaign Legal Center, where he can work with people who don’t hiss and spit ichor at the mention of the word “ethics.” He said his goal in the new job will be to seek “bipartisan solutions” in state and federal government ethics programs.

“In working with the current administration, it has become clear that we need to strengthen the ethics program,” he said.

It’s sort of a fun exercise to read the WaPo story on Shaub’s resignation aloud and follow each paragraph with, “Yeah, ya THINK?”

Shaub resigned with six months left in his term; the acting director of the OGE is likely to be the office’s chief of staff, Shelley Finlayson, unless President Trump appoints an interim director while he chooses a permanent replacement. Maybe Jared could do it.

It’s not clear who’s on Trump’s short list to be the next director of Government Ethics; top candidates so far include Jack Abramoff, Bernie Madoff, former BP CEO Tony “I Just Want My Life Back” Heyward, Jim Bakker, Niccolo Machiavelli, Vlad the Impaler, and Actual Josef Mengele. (We left Chris Christie off the list, because who’d even believe that?)

Asked for comment on the resignation, White House staff had no immediate comment, or if they did, it couldn’t be heard over the sounds of loud lounge music, exhilarated whoops, and champagne corks popping.

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[WaPo]

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  • Latverian Diplomat

    This just in: Trump to rename Office of Government Ethics to Office of Government Schmethics.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg
    • Everrett Fanuelli

      Were there any draft picks involved?

      • jesterpunk

        Yes but no one wanted Trump.

        • WotsAllThisThen

          Sorry, was that draft picks or daft pricks?

          • jesterpunk

            Yes.

    • Covfefe

      FWIW, Canada has negotiated a trade deal with the EU as well. EU member States are expected to approve it, now that Belgium has dropped it objections.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        So that’s why the Britons hate Belgium.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Once the Belgians were done waffling

        • mailman27

          And flandering around.

          • onedollarjuana

            It’s because the Belgians are a Trippel threat.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      In your face, President Jackass.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      Wake up, Brexit morans.

      • Zippy W Pinhead

        Wake up, Trumpanzees

    • Oblios_Cap
      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Sigh. Too bad we can’t do much about it else then protesting and rallying up our EU allies. We don’t have to look at the White house for support.

  • mardam422

    So this opens up another job for Jared, right?

    • Latverian Diplomat

      So much to not do, so little time.

    • Pilotshark

      as long as he doesn`t have to add it or fill out another SF-86 form.

    • Zippy W Pinhead

      Now that he’s done bringing about Mideast peace

      • Doug Langley

        Took him a whole weekend, but I think he’s free now.

  • Well, the people wanted government run like a business, and that’s what they’re going to get.

    They’re getting Bear Sterns and Enron governance now: “Loot what you can and get to a non-extradition country before it all comes crumbling down and the cops start knocking.”

    • GoutMachine

      Precisely. I’ve long said that people who say they want government run like a business has never worked in either. At least, they’ve never worked in an ethical, responsible business.

      • Skeptical_thinker

        My response to the “waste, fraud and abuse in government” complaints is that if you think there is no waste, fraud and abuse in the private sector you have never worked in the private sector.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “My administration is the most honest in history…our ethics guy left…he had nothing to do. I never met with him once…”
    — Donald Trump

    • Mr. Blobfish

      He was crazy.

  • exinkwretch

    The House of Trump is cleanest, most honorable, most ethical royal family in human history! The filthy, dishonest liars in the MSM should be shut down immediately for implying otherwise! Off with their heads!

  • whitroth

    Weasel libel!

    Hey, how ’bout a class act-ion lawsuit against Trumpolini, his family, and all his associates for the US of A to seize all his ass-ets so that the money comes to us…?

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Another drain swamped! As promised!”
    — Donald Trump

  • Crystalclear12

    Imagine his uplifting farewell speech to his staff:
    We’re all fucked.
    Run while you can.
    Peace out.

  • cmd resistor

    This guy was one of my few heroes left in the government. Actually, off the top of my head I can’t think of any other ones right now.
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/24a55ac50910c5faeb46005f980a286998aaf6d3e19fad397480ed523ffa6657.jpg

    • formerChild

      Adam Schiff? Al Franken? Maxine Waters?

      • cmd resistor

        I was thinking administration, not Congress or Senate. There might be a few left from Obama that I’m not remembering.

        • calliecallie

          I am sure there are many career civil servants still working in the trenches whose names we do not know, but who are trying their level best, just like Mr. Schaub did, to keep the ship of state floating, and in the right direction, despite this galley fire in the administration.

          • Pilotshark

            kind of lets me sleep at night knowing that there are sane professionals at CIA, FBI, NSA etc… who do really care about they`re jobs and country.
            Doing what they can when they can, just to keep the dam from busting.

          • calliecallie

            Not to mention EPA, HHS, DOT, DOJ, etc. A fine bureaucrat knows there’s more than one way to evade a political appointee’s whims. Government moves slowly for good reason. It takes a nutjob like Trump at the top to help the rest of the populace understand why it’s good government moves slowly.

          • cmd resistor

            Probably so. I don’t envy them their jobs, either.

          • therblig

            i’ve been through my share of administration changes, but even the worst of them pales in comparison to what those folks must be going through under this shitfest. i wish them luck and the strength to get through it.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Jeff Merkley. Elizabeth Warren. Ted Lieu. Peter DeFazio.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Pussy and pot. Two great tastes that go together.

  • BigCSouthside

    Roger Stone is a shoe in for the job

    • Mr. Blobfish

      If he keep from being assasinated.

      • Cliff Hendroval

        Again.

    • Doug Langley

      Because he’s a heel?

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    Okay, so oligarchy it is then?

  • BearLeft

    A statement from TRump said simply, “My office has the biggest ethics you’ve ever seen.”

  • elviouslyqueer

    I swear, this administration is well on its way to being The Turd That Just Won’t Flush.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      “on its way”?!

      Are you on drugs? And, can I have some? (asking for a friend)

      • Villago Delenda Est

        It was there from 9 November 2016 on.

  • Joe Beese

    Dear Mr. President:

    I am resigning from my position because you are A LOATHSOME FUCKING CRIMINAL AND I CAN’T EVEN.

    Respectfully,
    Walter M. Schaub, Jr.

    • elviouslyqueer

      PS, feel free to belly up the All You Can Eat Fried Rat Dicks Buffet, you venal asshole.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        PPS Does your mother know about this? Oh, wait, she’s dead, and if she were alive she’d probably approve, so no loss.

        • Jerilynadaniels

          Managing director of Google says we are paying $97 per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family^hi226:
          On tuesday I got a great new Ford F-150 from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it ,,,,Then check this out
          ~xd226:
          ➽➽
          ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash526HomeSecret/GetPay$97/Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::~xd226o……

  • Scooby

    I’m predicting he won’t appoint any one…he will just shut down the office.

  • Vincent Ricola

    I don’t blame him, I get it, but JFC there’s not going to be anyone left to keep sounding the alarms if all the people who aren’t corrupt nazi fuckwads keep resigning.

    • cmd resistor

      He only had 6 months left anyhow.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      As far as ‘sounding the alarms’ goes – in the current White House environment, it’s like the ‘tree falls in the forest’ conundrum.

    • Mr. Blobfish

      Speaking of corrupt nazi fuckwads, whatever happened to that Gorka feller.

      • Vincent Ricola

        Oh he’s still around. CNN keeps putting him on the air as a White House representative and giving him respect like they don’t realize he’s a proud Nazi.

    • miss_grundy

      There will always be the “intelligence community”. And Orange McFuckface decided to deride it, yet again, while making his stupid speech in Poland. They cannot screw this jerk sideways without benefits of votes fast enough for me.

  • Lance Thrustwell

    If anyone is looking for a cushy government job with zero responsibilities and an empty in-tray every day… I hear there’s one opening up!

  • Panika MCD

    it’s going to be Tom Delay or John Colyandro.

    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Nah. It’ll be Martin Shkreli after Little Babby Donnie pardons him.

      • Covfefe

        Dead end job for a grifter.

      • Panika MCD

        nah, he’s got the same problem as Ken Paxton: currently in legal tie ups. Delay and Colyandro are finished with theirs.

        • SweetDeeKat

          Oh dear FSM in heaven. I did not need to think about any of those punchable fucktards right now. I’m going over to LoveMeow.com.

      • Noxious Resistance

        ‘Ey, rich douchebags need to watch out for each other!

  • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

    Ya gotta admire Mr. Shaub for resigning. He could have just stayed home playing XBOX for the next 3½ years (throws up in mouth). Predisent Trump (throws up in mouth)would never notice.

  • baconzgood

    Man that’s pretty sad when the United States Office of Government Ethics quits. I mean seriously that wasn’t a hard job to turn a blind eye to.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_Traficant

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_DeLay

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scooter_Libby

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oliver_North

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spiro_Agnew

    Shall the list goes on?

  • OrdinaryJoe

    If you see a forest fire, you need to call it a forest fire. Just saying that you think there may be a few trees burning does not convey the depth of the problem.

    • Crank Tango

      It may just be a coincidence that there are thousands of trees burning at the same time and in the same location. We can never be sure.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    “By the way, asshole, I’m offering Robert Mueller my services to nail your worthless corrupt ass against the inside of Leavenworth.”

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Ethics? We don’t need no stinking ethics! https://goo.gl/images/vjtBF5

  • shastakoala
    • JustPixelz (((Ω)))

      Enjoy that future coal mine while it lasts.

    • Crank Tango

      Looks like by me, but without as many dead conifers.

    • weejee

      Obviously not Washington – it’s not raining.

    • And why do they have cell towers or wifi there? I suspect civilization has been cropped. 😉

  • Nounverb911

    So Grover Nordquist is finally getting wish of a government small enough to drown in a bathtub.

    • Vecchioivan

      Or a government stupid enough to drown in a rainstorm.

      • Villago Delenda Est

        Or fall down on a wet sidewalk and drown.

  • Panika MCD

    “I’m not saying it was the Trump lack of ethics–but it was the lack of ethics at the White House since 1/20/17.”

    maybe he could hire Huey Long. he’s been getting more and more recognition and they’re grrrreat friends. tremendous!

  • Nounverb911

    Off topic in a trumpish sort of way:

    https://twitter.com/NewYorker/status/882976890331549696

  • motocat

    Let’s not forget another recent ethics resigner, Hui Chen from the Justice Dept. I hope this is a trend. : https://www.commondreams.org/news/2017/07/03/top-ethics-official-resigns-says-working-trump-requires-abandonment-conscience

  • Beanz&Berryz

    We’re all off chatting about babby buttholes while Dok gamely tries to keep us connected to the world.

  • Oblios_Cap

    I the way he tried to remind Two Scoops that public service is a public trust in the resignation letter. He should have done it sooner, though. Donnie won’t get past the first sentence.

    • cmd resistor

      He won’t even read it.

    • He can’t read anything but his own name. And he has to sound it out.

    • miss_grundy

      Because it doesn’t have his name…..

    • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

      Politics is a way to inflate your ego and enrich yourself, silly. Public service is for the building maintenance people.

    • Mike Steele

      He’s been at it since day one, O_C. Filed numerous complaints, called out hosts of issues, of course, to no avail. Guy knew his job, just wasn’t getting to do it.

  • Beanz&Berryz

    Differently bad-assed than that Memphis toddler.

  • I say we put Hui Chen, Walter Schaub, OHJB, Adam Schiff, and the ghost of Daniel Patrick Moynihan together and call them The Goddamn Justice League.

    • What about the Ghost of Paul Wellstone? He’d probably have to ass to kick too

      • There’s always a place at the table for Mr. Wellstone and his memory.

        • sarafina

          Get Al Franken, I think he’s more articulate than Paul.

    • Mike Steele

      Superb mix; a sign of exquisite taste.

  • FauxAntocles

    Ahem, cats can be taught to come when called.

    • Villago Delenda Est

      I find that shaking a bag of treats will do the trick.

      • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

        Opening the refrigerator. They materialize out of the ether.

        • h4rr4r

          Clink their plates together.

          What everyone’s cats have their own plates, don’t look at me like that.

          • Oblios_Cap

            I whistle at the front door and they come running. Especially at dinnertime.

          • Vagenda of Rebel Scum

            Just lean in. Give them their own seats at the dining room table and little hats at birthday parties. It’ll be fun!

    • Mpeg

      Except when they’re shut inside the kitchen cabinet you hadn’t seen them sneaking into, when you went to close it. Then you’re thinking, later, Where’s my cat. And she’s thinking, Hey it’s cool in here, I’ll just chill a while. And you call. And she ignores .. . and you remain mystified, until you backtrack-reverse-catalog all the closet- or porch- or cabinet-doors you’ve closed in the last half hour since you saw her until you open the right one and there she is, as if, “What?”

      Actually that’s more like “cats… taught to answer when called” but, at any rate that was how she and I spent part of yesterday evening~

      • therblig

        one thanksgiving, we couldn’t imagine where one of our cats had disappeared to…until we opened the fridge and found her gnawing on the turkey.

    • lurch394

      Much as I like my cats to come when I call, I don’t feed them canned food. The can opener triggers a Pavlovian response that works every time.

    • TJ Barke

      My cats just come because they love me.

      • calliecallie

        Man, have those cats got you snowed!

      • Mike Steele

        Yeah, right. Sounds like you may have confused them with dogs.

        • TJ Barke

          If anything they’ve confused themselves.

    • mailman27

      My cat comes when I snap my fingers. Wherever he is, whatever he’s doing. Weird. (Also of course when I clink his bowl.)

      • Mike Steele

        Mom’s deathbed demand was that we tend her cat till its natural demise. We did. It lived to be 21, and would magically appear every time you sliced open a cantaloupe. Go figure.

  • h4rr4r

    Isn’t this what Trump wants?

    Not saying I blame the guy, just suspecting that any replacement is going to be more of a “team player”.

  • Crank Tango

    “It’s clear that there isn’t more I could accomplish,”

    So, peak ethics achieved, then?

    • jesterpunk

      He is leaving before he had permanent brain damage from smacking his head on the brick wall.

    • Rick Hill

      It’s all downhill from here. Once corporations find they can just buy cities and states the rest will be a matter holding the auctions

      • therblig

        Rollerball!!!!

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      I’ve written a bunch of resignation letters in my 30+ years of my career, and in every one I thanked my manager for the privelege of having served under him or her…whether it was true or not. But I suppose it wouldn’t be cricket for the head of the ethics office to lie.

  • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

    Somewhat OT

    President Donald Trump apparently waited too long to book a hotel room for the G20 summit in Hamburg, and other world leaders snapped up every luxury hotel in town, according to a report published Wednesday by BuzzFeed. Trump’s staff is instead staying at the U.S. Consulate General in Hamburg, according to the report, and the President is staying in Hamburg’s official Senate guest house guarded by police…near the city’s Islamic center and the Russian general consulate.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/db0eb066078e940023d100a169d422666603ca1a962c0d24acd257d608985e59.png

    • h4rr4r

      Do they have the plastic sheets?

      • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

        Feeling crabby, are we?

        • h4rr4r

          Just a little pissed.

        • weejee

          Since the tRumps bite, turnaround would only be fair.

    • Spurning Beer

      I got an email a few days ago from an elderly distant relative who lives north of Hamburg, in the old East Germany. She said NATO helicopters and jets were overhead constantly in preparation for the G20. And that the “emir” (I assume she meant the King of Saudi Arabia) had “taken Trump’s hotel,” and in addition to a large staff, had brought along camels, for their milk.

      Honest to God. Maybe it’s true.

      • jesterpunk

        So the UN was going to implement Agenda 21 and take all their guns? Is that what you are saying?

        • GoutMachine

          Obvs! But don’t forget the Ameros!

        • Spurning Beer

          I suspect that “all their guns” would number less than a dozen in Ostpommern-Mecklenburg, and I’m guessing there’s something they worry about getting taken away from them by the Globalists, but I don’t know what. Maybe the David Hasselhoff reruns.

      • Doug Langley

        I heard something about camels and milk, don’t know details.

        • Rags

          Wait for the videos!

      • cmd resistor

        I did read that the King of Saudi Arabia had the whole Four Seasons, I think. And it did mention that he brought camels for the milk. It was not some flake news site, either.

        • Spurning Beer

          Thanks! I will now give stronger credence to what cousin Heike tells me.

      • HarpyLibtart

        Probably – one of my adopted aunties used to manage the Four Seasons in Cairo and told us that one of the Saudi princes would regularly rent out a floor, bring his favorite sons, wives and goats to stay (the goats had a ROOM, ya’ll) and then just pay to have the whole floor refurbished when they left.

    • Rick Hill

      What? Even Putin didn’t want to put him up?

      • therblig

        trumpy’s job is to get putin up.

    • Msgr_MΩment

      Even the bedbugs refuse to stay in the same hotel.

    • sarafina

      I’m pretty sure neither Obama nor G. Warcriminal Bush booked their own hotels. Just how incompetent IS Trump’s advance team?

  • Spurning Beer

    That letter is either a masterpiece of tact, or it’s dripping with sarcasm. Hard to tell.

  • Mr. Blobfish

    Did the Polish First Lady ever shake Donnie’s doll hands?

    • weejee

      She has to complete the rest of her vaccinations.

    • Rick Hill

      Idk but the look on his face as she snubbed him….heehehe

      • bupkus231

        You know, I had to wonder if that was really a “snub” – something something old European custom something something sexism…

        IOW – maybe she wasn’t expecting for Rump to offer to shake her hand….

        • cmd resistor

          Yeah, maybe some custom that the first lady would shake the first lady’s hand first. But he obviously expected everyone would want to shake HIS hand.

    • cmd resistor

      Actually, she did, after shaking Melania’s. At least I saw one clip of it. Not before he got a sad/mad/rejected look on his face,though.

  • I am a champion sarcastic. This guy wins all the sarcasm medals ever.

  • “Stop throwing the Constitution in my face! It’s just a goddamned piece of paper!”
    http://www.stridentconservative.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/Donald-Trum-Burn-the-Constitution-300×195.jpg

    Makes a great fire starter!

  • weejee
  • Raan

    And hired by Robert Mueller in 3, 2…

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    When you have a complicit Reptilian Congress full of greedy assholes in it for themselves and their rich cronies over the ideals of country, than no amount of ethics or laws matter, because those morally bankrupt fuckers can’t be bothered with the checks and balances that the founders envisioned. So yeah, I understand Shaub’s blowing that clam stand.

    • Cousin Itt de La Résistance

      blowing that clam stand.

      Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

      • JustDon’tSaySortMyBalls

        And shouldn’t that be “clam can?”

        • Oblios_Cap

          YOU MONSTER!

          • JustDon’tSaySortMyBalls

            …never gets old…

    • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

      Just remember, there’s money in that banana stand….

  • Nockular cavity

    “When asked to comment about the resignation of the Director of the Office of Government Ethics, a Trump Administration official said ‘Who?’ and ‘What?'”

  • Bill D. Burger
  • Bill D. Burger
  • Lyly Sirivong

    All these people who are resigning because they can’t take it anymore should form a support group.

    • Crystalclear12

      Hello, my name is Sally and i am a Trump firee.
      Hello, Sally!

  • Raan

    Also, if Elaine Chao ever resigns, he could make Ceaușescu the new transportation secretary. After all, he did build the Transfăgărășan.

  • Bill D. Burger

    ot…but funny! “We’rethehellareeee’……Where the hell are we?”

    https://twitter.com/LawyerRogelio/status/883018229605597186

    • OutOfOrbit

      That’s pathetic even for a POS.

    • Portia McGonagal

      What is this, the third or fourth time Uncle Fudbutter hasn’t known where he is?

    • Claire

      His secret service agents are like “Jesus, not this again.”

      • Mike Steele

        Didya notice – he kept looking down as though for stage markings so he’d know where to stand. Ah, show biz…old habits die hard.

    • Notreelyhelping

      You ever get the feeling he eats the Adderal like M&Ms and hasn’t slept in about six years?

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      “wait, what are we doing here?- DJT

    • Rags

      my mother got this look more and more as she sank into Alzheimers.

    • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

      How many Republicans does it take to screw a country?

      • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

        About 60,000,000.

    • Invisible Bunyip

      I’m surprised the Secret Service let him wander out from behind his bulletproof shield.

  • Wild Cat

    “What? What? I have to replace the fucking Effects Chief? Why can’t that fucking Hollywood guy, Bannon, do that?”

  • Panika MCD

    OT – so there are about a million people running in the TX Dem primary in CD21–Lamar Smith’s seat

    you met one yesterday–Chris Perri–when TX Dept. of Space Tacos posted photos of an InfoWars “journalist” being an asshole.

    today you get to meet Derrick Crowe–and I swear they’re not all blond, blue eyed boys–who just got arrested. https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2017/7/6/1678255/-Democratic-candidate-for-Congress-arrested-while-protesting-health-repeal

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    public service is a public trust

    I’m surprised he lasted as long as he did with that philosophy. Good luck to him, and God help all of us FFS.

  • Wild Cat

    OT: We have problems. This nation has massive motherfucking problems that may soon be ours:

    https://www.theguardian.com/global-development/2017/jul/06/el-salvador-teen-rape-victim-sentenced-30-years-prison-stillbirth

    • Resistance Fighter Callyson

      Good God, that is horrible.

      • Wild Cat

        Every time I try to go back to reading the news I see why I stopped.

    • Vincent Ricola

      What in the fuck?!

      • Oblios_Cap

        It appears misogyny and religious intolerance are alive and well in El Salvador.

    • Bill D. Burger
      • Vincent Ricola

        “Abortion was criminalised in El Salvador 20 years ago, after legislators from across the political spectrum voted to strip women of their reproductive rights without any public debate or medical consultation about the consequences. The 1997 reform was passed after a shadowy campaign by a small group of powerful anti-choice groups linked to the Catholic church.”

        *shudder*

        • HarpyLibtart

          Is anyone else starting to suspect that maybe the Catholic church is a little TOO interested in keeping the supply of fresh young’uns coming?

    • Mike Steele

      Thanks, Pope Francis. BTW, have you found a new job for the Cardinal’s secretary? Make sure you don’t warn the receiving parish in advance….

  • Portia McGonagal

    Translation: “You and your whole band of grifty grifters are slimy AF and I don’t want to be here when the shit goes down”

    Respectfully ( HA!),
    Outta Here

  • Resistance Fighter Callyson

    Upon Shaub’s departure, the ethics office’s chief of staff, Shelley K. Finlayson, is expected to assume the role of acting director, although Trump could appoint another senior OGE official to serve temporarily until he chooses a permanent replacement. In 2014, Shaub described Finlayson as “a tireless advocate for OGE’s mission” and praised “her reliably cool judgment.”

    I give her six weeks. Good luck, honey!

    • BigCSouthside

      Yep. She’ll get Yates’d

  • Michael R

    It’s not clear who’s on Trump’s short list to be the next director of Government Ethics

    They could always dig up Roy Cohn

    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/14f775745fa6a800bc1995708e248915d7ee8025290985e47687bf953ad3d7a7.jpg

    • P’jama Pahnts
      • JustDon’tSaySortMyBalls
      • Lance Thrustwell

        It’s an evil Pee-Wee Herman.

        • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

          Isn’t “evil Pee-Wee Herman” redundant?

          Besides, it’s obvious who the best person for the job is, and it’s not like he doesn’t have time to do it: Jared Kushner. Who better to police Dampnut’s ethics than his nepotistically appointed son-in-law?

          • JerryRich

            I don’t know if jerking off makes one “evil”.

          • Snark Tank Full of Resistance

            According to my mom it does.

          • BreakingDeadMen

            Pee Wee is snotty, but not really evil.

          • Old Man Yells at Cloud

            My impression was something other than snot that got Pee-Wee in trouble in that theater.

          • BreakingDeadMen

            If wanking is evil, we are all doomed.

      • Holly

        Who here doesn’t want to see this bozo go to jail?

        • Old Man Yells at Cloud

          From his shirt, we can see that he does look good in stripes.

    • Lance Thrustwell

      What a weird, scary-lookin’ motherfucker. And that was Trump’s other father figure. Gah.

    • damn. i can totally see eric there.

  • Jenny

    I dunno, I feel like stepping down during the most unethical administration ever might be defeating the purpose of being in the ethics office. Ya kind of need to be there saying this shit is unethical and handing it off to the papers/legislature.

    • Jackie Jones

      Yes – second person to resign due to appalling ethics. Leaving what?

    • Mike Steele

      Magical thinking, dear Jenny. Some papers are on it already; remainder of MSM just counting their money, ’cause unethical sells. Congress, primarily (R)s, have zero fucks to give, as they’re livin’ the dream of deregulation and wouldn’t give it up if Trump sold the Statue of Liberty to the Saudi families that financed 9/11.

  • puredog

    Martin Shkreli would be perfect for this job.

  • Rags

    His nicely nice bye bye letter is probably calculated to allow him to move to the non-partisan ethics group without coming pre-labelled as a hater and loser non-4-5 supporter.

  • Lark_in_the_AM

    I’m sad to see him go, but I understand why he resigned – it feel so good when you stop being the irresistible force to someone else’s immovable object.

    • cmd resistor

      The Post article also made it sound like this job opportunity where he felt like he had a chance to do some good had come up and he wasn’t sure it would be there in 6 months when he finished his sentence, I mean term.

  • Msgr_MΩment

    …finally got tired of being the canary in the ethics coal mine, so he cheeped one last time and keeled right over…

    Not before one last prolonged squawk.

  • Mavenmaven

    It will be Rudy Giuliani.

  • La forza del resistino

    as long as prior rap sheets are not a show stopper, Jack Abramoff is tanned, rested and ready and has a background in interpretive ethics.

  • Jackie Jones

    Will no one stand up to this turd?

    • Old Man Yells at Cloud

      Lil’Donnie is your classic really bad manager. Anyone who stands up to him gets “You’re Fired!” as disloyal instead of recognizing that someone who will stand up to the boss is actually being more loyal.

  • Phoenixdoglover

    The watchdogs are giving up. We might be truly, royally fucked.

    • BreakingDeadMen

      IDK, I think he’s going to Comey up.

  • BeachBum

    Apparently the market for martyrdom has hit rock bottom. Too bad.

  • Longstreet63

    Like we needed such an office. the new guys will make it into a profit center! Maybe they could have expensive seminars led by ethics experts personally selected by Donald Trump!

    • SayItWithWookies

      If only the OGE were run like a business…

  • Poly_Ester

    Trump’s idea of an ethical question is “How likely am I to get away with it.”

  • Empress of the Iguana People

    Nah, it’ll be the pharmabro

    • ⭐️Most Accurate Poster 2017⭐️

      Oh jesus I can see that happening.

  • Doug Langley

    Attention! Turgid Love Muscle just dropped in on the Rick Perry thread!

  • capnkrunch

    He gave 2 weeks notice. What a gentleman.

  • Skaarphy

    That was quite a takedown by Mr Shaub. He basically said: “You’re not all this.”

  • Alan

    This really can’t be good and I hold the fuckwads in congress responsible for it all by enabling the crooks and liars in the white house.

  • catnmus

    Noooo!!! That was the guy doing all the things! I’m really starting to get worried that there will not remain a single check or balance on this administration. At least by working at a non-profit that seems to be focused on those same things. maybe he can find a way to get Congress to care about this.
    Oh wait. Never mind.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    Maybe Jane Sanders, if he wants to make it appear bipartisan.

    Yeah, come at me, bros.

    • sarafina

      Isn’t she busy in court for the next little while?

    • Unsaintific

      👍… LMAO

  • The Librarian

    Best wishes to Mr. Shaub. The new job sounds perfect for him. He did the best he could given the near impossible circumstances. The Trump govt (improper, incorrect, indecorous, naughty, unbecoming, unseemly; corrupt, debased, debauched, degenerate, depraved, dissolute, libertine, perverted, reprobate; unprincipled, unscrupulous; atrocious, infamous, villainous; base, low, mean, vicious, vile; blameworthy, objectionable, offensive; iniquitous, nefarious; errant, erring, fallen) wouldn’t understand ethics if it bit them in the arse.

    • man that is a beautiful list.

      but the one trump gov’t thing is: minority.

    • Mike Steele

      Lady MS: That was breathtaking! Roget sends his regards.

      • The Librarian

        Mr. Roget was my best friend in college. I still have the copy I bought 40 years ago. :)

        • Zyxomma

          I won one in a spelling bee.

          • The Librarian

            Cherish it!

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    Once Martin Schxkrelli finishes tainting the jury pool with his face-taint, maybe he would be avail?

  • Keith Taylor

    Actually, Nicolo Machiavelli did have a few principles, despite his bad press, and would probably not accept the job if it was offered. I can hear him now, saying, “Per Baccho, signores! Do you forget I am the man who wrote, ‘Yet it cannot be called talent to slay fellow-citizens, to deceive friends, to be without faith, without mercy, without religion; such methods may gain empire, but not glory’? Well I did, and it disqualifies me for the position you offer. Get someone else. Get Cesare Borgia maybe. Or even better, one of the Visconti, whose coat of arms is, appropriately, a serpent devouring a human child. It would suit them well. Arrevederci.”

    • BreakingDeadMen

      I imagine Machiavelli being like the lawyers who are turning him down. “What’s the point of advising him, he’s not going to listen anyway.”

      • Keith Taylor

        Yes, he would probably think that too.

    • C4TWOMAN

      The whole Machiavelli = evil politics incarnate thing, is because modern people

      a) don’t understand these principles apply to managing a princedom, not just any ambitious or political endeavor
      b) modern people don’t understand what a princedom is.

      “The Prince” simply bluntly explains the nuts and bolts of managing your fiefdom, resources, alliances and defenses without any hypocritical peans to Divine Rights or “noblesse”. It was never intended to be a personal philosophy or how to manage personal relationships or career, unless that field in some way mimics a “princedom”. And they certainly weren’t meant to be applied to large nation states or republics.

      Machiavelli also wrote The Republic, which are his thoughts on how to manage….wait for it…A Republic. And unlike many moderns, or at least Americas of a III% “libutry” bent, Machiavelli undertsoood what a republic is.

  • ez

    Martin Shkreli looks to be available for the position.

    • Jerilynadaniels

      Managing director of Google says we are paying $97 per hour! Work for few hours and have longer with friends & family^hi225d:
      On tuesday I got a great new Mitsubishi i-MiEV from having earned $8752 this last four weeks.. Its the most-financialy rewarding I’ve had.. It sounds unbelievable but you wont forgive yourself if you don’t check it.Then start by visiting this link
      ~xd225d:
      ➽➽
      ➽➽;➽➽ http://GoogleFinancialJobsCash525BuzzSecret/GetPay$97/Hour ★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★✫★★:::::~xd225o….

      • ez

        Seemingly most mass murderers, serial killers and political assassins have three names as well JLD, which is your goal?

  • Mike Steele

    MS and I used to say: “Well, at least Walter Shaub will be around until almost the midterms”…ah, yes…good times.

  • Zyxomma

    Vey iz mir.

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