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There’s something wrong with the president, y’all.

You can see though how he would have missed the 15,000 pound limousine, “The Beast,” awaiting him directly beneath his plane. He was so relieved to make it down the stairs, it just completely escaped him, before he was caged by a handler and gently pointed in the right direction.

Is it the first time Donald Trump has lost things? No!

Once, Donald Trump lost Rudy Giuliani.

Once, Donald Trump lost Bibi Netanyahu.

And once, Donald Trump lost the popular vote by 2.9 million people.

So much losing. Very sad.

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  • beingreleased

    Enough with your old-crazy-person-dementia-suffering-asshole shaming.

    Well, I’ll make an exception in this one case.

  • Jenny

    Maybe he can travel to the Bermuda Triangle for his next trip. I hear it is lovely during hurricane season. Maybe he can take his yacht, the best yacht, The Ivanka.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “Remember when I tried to leave a room through a locked door? Seems charmingly eccentric now, don’t it?”
    — W
  • Ryan Denniston

    If he doesn’t want to get in the limo and get on his way to being preznit, I am certain we can find someone who would happily take the job.

    • willi0000000

      . . . unfortunately, his name is pence.

  • Iron Monkey

    Commander in chief of the most powerful military in the world. What could go wrong?
  • Vincent Ricola

    He hasn’t been able to find Tiffany in 23 years and he thinks there was a kid named Barron running around at some point. *sniff*

    • Ryan Denniston

      Isn’t Barron the one in charge of protecting us against The Cyber?

      • Vincent Ricola

        Yes. He is working closely with Rudy Ghouliani because they are the best at the cyber.

  • Ryan Denniston
    • Joe Beese

      I’m 10 years younger than he was then, and even I would know to hold on to the fucking handrail – especially if it was raining.

  • That first video needs sound like I need a second or third funny body part.

  • Counter Sniper

    He also lost the EO he was gonna sign and walked out of the room instead. Remember that? Sad.

  • starfanglednut

    I know a nice (read crappy and understaffed and endangered by looming cuts to Medicaid) nursing home that wound be happy to take him in. Until he annoyed the other residents and staff so much that they’d have to push his wheelchair out into the street with votes.

    • willi0000000

      he better hope Tommy Udo doesn’t work there.

      [ Richard Widmark did such a good job at being Tommy ]

      • Maggielle

        Widmark was so cool. Can you imagine if he and Christopher Walken had had a chance to make a movie together? Add in Buscemi and William H. Macy and I would so watch that movie. Seriously. Talk about a face with a view – each of those guys haz it, and they’re so good.

      • starfanglednut

        Hey! Long time no see! How’ve you been?

        • willi0000000

          better . . . than.

          delay in response caused by delivery, and subsequent test drive, of new mattress . . . it sleeps well . . . other features will probably never get tested.

          other than that, i’m on better meds and feel like i can almost breathe.

          so, how’s you?

  • Latverian Diplomat

    Nursing home staff briefing 2018:
    “Just a reminder, the patient in Room 204 will call you ‘Ivanka’ and he will try to grab you by the pussy.”

  • Isabella Martin

    He has the look of someone with onset of dementia, still with it enough to realize and be frightened and trying to hide his confusion. Dementia is awful, no matter how big of asshole someone is.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      He’s already so demented, that the onset of senile dementia is really hard to spot.

    • Joe Beese

      God help us if he actually does get 25th-ed back to Mar-a-Lago. The right wing noise machine will make it sound as tragic as King Lear.

      (Who, in fairness, also had a fucked-up relationship with his daughter.)

  • unmasked mumbler

    LOL at Giuliani not being able to say “this administration has accomplished so much in so little time” with a straight face.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      I’m ok with them taking this triumphalist tone, frankly. I want them doing less and thinking they’re awesome, rather than realizing they’re idiots and being more driven. They have a ridiculous amount of power to fuck us if they didn’t keep stepping on rakes.

      • willi0000000

        that’s why we can’t take our eyes off the ones who can get things done . . . like mcconnell and ryan . . . and, of course, their owners.

  • Bub, the truculent Zombie

    Whatever state Donnie may be visiting, he is always in the same state. The state of confusion.

  • Villago Delenda Est

    I’m looking forward to him insulting the Poles, in Poland, in his moranic efforts to suck up to Vlad.

    • Old town Urbandale

      “A Polack, a Russian, and the Pope walk into a bar…”

  • The Wanderer

    “A mind is a terrible thing to waste.”

    • Vicki Lawrence’s Covfefe

      Or as Dan Quayle would say, “What a waste it is to lose one’s mind.”

      • The Wanderer

        “Is our children learning?”

        • Latverian Diplomat

          “Is our creepy old orange dudes learning? Signs point to no.”

          • The Wanderer

            “Answer unclear; ask again later.”

      • coozledad

        I remember when Quayle thought Buzz Lukens was an astronaut.

        • Vicki Lawrence’s Covfefe

          You think he stays up nights wondering whatever happened to Murphy Brown’s baby?

  • Mavenmaven

    remniscent of an episode from the Bush I era, he was campaigning and made a stop at a local nursing home, walked up to an elderly woman and said “hello, do you know who I am?” The woman looked up and said “no, but there’s an aide at the end of the hallway, if you ask her she’ll be glad to remind you”.

  • President in Exile Firefly

    I could stand to see him wander farther away. Maybe onto an ice floe.

    • Belasaurius

      or a nice hole in the ground

  • memzilla Ω

    Dolt 45 is just as healthy as our country is.

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “I’m the President…I decide where the limo is. That’s an executive order!”
    — Donald Trump

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

    off topic – what’s the latest with the Senate healtcare bill? They’re supposed to be taking it up after July 4, and I see nothing in the news.

    • Gayer Than Thou

      They secretly voted on it at a remote DC metro station at 3:00 a.m. this morning.

      • Vicki Lawrence’s Covfefe

        Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

      • dslindc

        Well nothing good happens on the Metro, so that sounds right.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      It’s still early and all the networks have to get through their daily “unhinged Trump Tweet unpacking.” They’ll probs get around to it noonish.

    • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

      McConnell sent it back to the CBO to score it with the Cruz/Lee “Let’s see what happens when we don’t understand how risk pools work” amendment.

      • cmd resistor

        I got the impression they hadn’t even gotten to the point where they had something to send to the CBO, although that was their hope, to get it in before the break.

    • Latverian Diplomat

      Just like ordinary working Americans, the Senate gets this whole week off…

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        lol, of course. It’s early here on my yacht in tahiti.

      • Belasaurius

        they need time to work their second jobs to pay their rent, oh wait, that’s the rest of us, never mind.

    • shivaskeeper

      Cruz is working on his even more horrible plan. McTurttle is still trying to twist arms behind the scenes. They are running into the fundamental problem of trying to appease the hard line loony birds of the Freedom Caucus/Tea Party wing and anyone who is even slightly moderate. Especially the moderates who are up for reelection this term.

      My prediction is they will fail to get the votes they need, but refuse to work with Dems. They will drop this and blame the Dems for being obstructionists. Then they will move on to gutting taxes for the rich.

  • Belasaurius

    didn’t Ronnie Raygun do this kind of shit?

    • TJ Barke

      And the morons loved him too.

  • Mpeg

    All those policy-refining, important-speech-crafting, diplomacy-practicing late-night/ early a.m. twitter-bullying sessions don’t come without a price, don’tcha know~

  • TX Dept. of Space Tacos
  • Gayer Than Thou

    In fairness, if I were President, I would do a lot of wandering off and running into walls and telephone poles because I would be perving on some hot Marine or Secret Service agent and not paying attention to where I was going. Not that that is, you know, a thing that has happened to me in my non-presidential life or anything.

    • Me not sure

      And yet, you would probably do a better job than Trump.

      • Lance Thrustwell

        Probably?

        • Me not sure

          Touchè

    • Celtic_Gnome

      There was a young lady at my job who wore spandex to work before they changed the dress code and could pull it off. I passed her going down the hall and actually ran into a door staring at her ass.

  • John Iwaniszek

    I think for this kind of thing, the Secret Service needs to put together a team of rodeo clowns.

  • tomamitai

    Goddamnit are you trying to make me feel sorry for Donald fucking Trump? You know how susceptible liberals are to such emotional manipulations, that’s why you so often feature pictures of cute babby animals (and humans also, too) when asking for monies! In the future, please reserve this weapon and use it only for good!

  • Latverian Diplomat

    “My example for all my fellow despots, don’t let this happen to you, go out while you are young, baby…”
    — Caligula

  • Me not sure

    How anyone could mistake this for somebody else’s car is beyond me. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/70a075ce7bd96cef383e58cc1cadddbdeba41accb304f8049d2e15c17d804b69.jpg

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      that info graphic is very informative – but that drawing of Trump was just the artist having fun.

      • Me not sure

        I snickered at the hand gesture.

        • Joe Beese

          I snickered at Melania smiling while in his presence.

          • Me not sure

            She’s flirting in the rear view mirror with the driver?

      • Old town Urbandale

        Obviously fake news. No red-blooded ‘Murican spells it “tyre.”

        • Ghenghis McCann

          Damn British auto correct, it was supposed to be “Tyrant.”

        • Querolous

          or “Armour”

          • Celtic_Gnome

            Not to mention aluminium. Is that stuff even recyclable?

    • Gayer Than Thou

      What, no cup holders in the back seat?

      • Me not sure

        Intravenous Coke dispenser.

        • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

          did you see the part in that graphic where they keep the presidentls blood on board!

          • Joe Beese

            To be precise, bags of his blood type.

            I suppose his own actual blood would be ideal. But having him store enough for the purpose might make him act stupid.

            And we wouldn’t want that.

          • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

            ahhhh, I missed that detail. Thanks. (I was trying to imagine trump sitting in his office on inaugration day, going, “You want to draw HOW MUCH BLOOD?”

          • Mildred Broxon

            And then it expires in time, so they would have to keep drawing more to replenish the supply. Gee, that might sap his strength! Good idea, we don’t need any incompatibility reactions here. Can’t be too careful.

          • Me not sure

            He’s O(range)+.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      Needs more (imitation) gold plate.

    • Ryan Denniston

      Bet it gets 10 gallons to the mile.

      • TJ Barke

        Optimist.

    • TJ Barke

      Pump action shotguns? Billions of dollars in defense and they have pump actions?

      • Celtic_Gnome

        Seriously. Where’s the 40 watt plasma rifle?

  • BigCSouthside

    I tried to give him benefit of the doubt here, but:

    1 it’s at the bottom of your airplane’s stairs. Who the fuck would you think it’s for?
    2 it has the presidential seal on the fuckin door
    3 some handler or staffer briefed him on the itinerary when they landed. I’m sure “walk from the airport to your final destination” wasn’t in there

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      I’m sure they are rectifying #3 as we speak.

    • NastyBossetti

      Now they have to add, “Get in the car. It’s literally at the bottom of the stairs” to his to-do list.

  • Crystalclear12

    Let him wander off.
    What’s the worst that could happen?

    • Vincent Ricola

      All the horrific things that they let him do because he’s famous? :(

    • Bub, the truculent Zombie

      He could get sucked into a running jet engine?

      Oh wait. You said “what’s the worst that could happen.”

      Sorry, my bad. Boy, is my face red…

      • Major_Major_Major

        That could seriously fuck up a jet engine…

        • Bub, the truculent Zombie

          Ik, r? And those things are expensive!

        • And some poor sap would have to pick out the giblets.

          • Maxine Headroom

            Nah, they’d just use a fire hose to spray water through it as it idles. Easy peasy!

        • Mildred Broxon

          Much worse than a flight of geese. More fat, for one.

  • Spotts1701, Resistance Pilot

    I see the problem – they forgot to bring the concubines. That would have helped direct him.

  • Let’s not forget when trump lost his way during the sigining of one of his EO’s:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4uR1yBx1Y8

  • The Rain in Spain’s Therapist

    I think he refused to get in until someone opened the door for him.

  • TundraGrifter

    This is what President Trump gets for being so rude and walking ahead of the First Lady. If he were a gentleman, he’d be walking side-by-side and she could gently guide him in the right direction.

    But he’s always got to be out front like they are tiff’ing it every day. So he gets what he deserves. Lost.

  • The Wanderer
  • dslindc

    dEmEnTiA!

    • The Wanderer

      I just heard that in Torgo’s voice.

  • Ghenghis McCann

    I’m sure saw the cartoon version when I was a kid, but it’s missing “Oh Magoo, you’ve done it again”.

    • The Wanderer

      I thought the same thing.

    • Amy!

      Somebody really needs to overdub that video.

  • Jenny

    All those limos look the same. Trump has never had the status of having his limo ready and waiting! He’s no Bloomberg!

  • jesterpunk

    Why the fuck was this even a thing in the first fucking place? It is great that states are stopping this but it should never have even happened to begin with.

    http://www.pbs.org/newshour/rundown/u-s-schools-rethink-lunch-shaming-policies-humiliate-children-meal-debts/

    Teaching assistant Kelvin Holt watched as a preschool student fell to
    the back of a cafeteria line during breakfast in Killeen, Texas, as if
    trying to hide.

    “The cash register woman says to this 4-year-old girl, verbatim, ‘You
    have no money,’” said Holt, describing the incident last year. A milk
    carton was taken away, and the girl’s food was dumped in the trash. “She
    did not protest, other than to walk away in tears.”

    • The Wanderer

      The cash register woman needed to have a finger amputated, pour encourager les autres.

      • sincarne

        Honestly, I have some sympathy for the woman working there. Cafeteria workers have lost their jobs for showing compassion for these children. Chances are good that someone working in that kind of gig is in a precarious position. She’s the symptom. The disease is the heartlessness at the top.

        • jesterpunk

          Read the comments on the article, people are actually ok with this happening. That is the main issue, so many heartless people who don’t care this is happening because they don’t want to pay taxes.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            It’s not just that they don’t want to pay taxes. They don’t want to pay taxes that allow someone else’s kid to get a free lunch when their kid doesn’t qualify for it.

        • Pax Americana Per Ars Smith

          No sympathy. If my job consisted of turning children away from food, it is not a job I’d want to keep.

          • sincarne

            As I say, though, she may not have a choice. You may not want to keep it, but her pittance may be all that’s keeping her off the streets. I don’t know, I’m speculating, but I do know that that area has unemployment above your national average: http://www.homefacts.com/unemployment/Texas/Bell-County/Killeen.html

          • Maggielle

            I’ll bet there’s a high turnover rate for that job.

    • Dr. Rrrrrobotnik

      Christ. Even in Dickens they gave the kids *a* portion.

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      what’s weird is I’ve heard/seen these stories since the Bush II era.

      • jesterpunk

        Yeah this has been going on for a while.

    • Oblios_Cap

      Just pointing out the kid’s lack of moral fortitude. Jesus would done the same thing.

      • willi0000000

        i thought he would have just collected the crumbs from the kid-next-to-him’s lunch and feasted on that.

    • TundraGrifter

      Remember the Regressives’ outrage when a little girl in North Carolina has her sack lunch from home taken away and she was forced to eat cafeteria food? It was a state program, of course, but they still managed to blame Mrs. Obama for her healthy school lunch notions.

      Now, at least, we have a First Lady very interested in…well, fashion, of course. Nice high heels. Selling jewelry on cable TV. And raising her son in NYC instead of DC. And…well, I’m sure there’s more…let me check…

    • Vincent Ricola

      I hope that 4-year-old girl grows up to be POTUS and makes her #1 platform goal restructuring lunchrooms all over America by taking the power away from asshole cash register people and giving it back to the students.

    • Jenny

      Killeen is a military town too. Most probably qualify for free lunch or just right above the line to get reduced or free. Preschool in Texas isn’t free unless you’re very poor or military. (that is right, you pay cash for preschool either private or public school, or your kid doesn’t go to school until Kindergarten) Either one of those situations would have been enough to get reduced lunches for that kid. That is an administration failure.

      The workers are minimum wage. They don’t particularly care that a kid doesn’t eat because they don’t eat either.

      My kids have had the cheese sandwich. Especially when I made just enough to miss qualifying for reduced lunch, but barely enough to make ends meet on Austin.

      If schools in Texas can afford million dollar football stadiums, they can afford to feed every child. Period.

      • willi0000000

        i don’t care if they can’t afford a football . . . no child should go hungry in a country that wastes so much food!

        [ . . . and makes “food” out of indigestible substances so they pass right through! ]

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          I am not sure what I find worse: the hunger or the humiliation.

          • Angela Ruzzo

            The humiliation is worse. She will forget the hunger, but she will never forget the humiliation.

          • Amy!

            Well, that sort of depends on how often she goes hungry, and how much impact it has on her health. The humiliation will prolly make that worse, though, since experiencing it once may make her unwilling to even risk being so treated again, preferring to starve herself instead.

          • Clark_Nova

            Let me tell you about Texas schools. When I was in the 5th grade in Kingsville, TX, they would hold an assembly twice a year to beat, pants down, with a big belt, any student who had been caught speaking Spanish on campus. Then they would give awards to the kids that turned them in. My friend, Susan Naranjo, got whipped the most for refusing to call herself “Susan Naran-JOE.

            I’ve heard similar stories about kids speaking French in Louisiana schools during that period.

        • NastyBossetti

          And they are wasting the very food this child couldn’t pay for! “Can’t pay for it? It’s trash now!” That just… boggles my mind. If they were going to throw it away anyway, maybe instead they could have used it to feed that little kid?!

          • SpideySenser

            The logic, so twisted.

      • Amy!

        School lunch programs were actually introduced, in part, as a means of ensuring that America’s future soldiers didn’t suffer childhood deficiency diseases. This happened after the second world war, which happened after the great depression, which resulted in lots of kids with deficiency diseases.

        My father was a professor of history at a small college, so apart from his specialty, he ended up teaching history of education, for the students in the education department. He was also born in 1932, and suffered a number of childhood deficiency diseases partly because his father was unable to get a job for the first five year’s of my father’s life. Daddy was 4F for Korea; they wouldn’t take him because he wasn’t healthy enough. He wasn’t the only one.

        Stupid-ass hyper-conservative fuckwits don’t care about any of this, of course, because learning from history isn’t something that they bother with.

    • MynameisBlarney

      What a fucking bitch.

    • NastyBossetti

      It totally makes sense to dump food in the trash because a preschooler can’t afford to pay for it.

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Dickens once wrote a book on that.

      • LucindathePook

        Dickens wrote innumerable books on that.

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          Let’s not make this a pissing contest. I’ve had asparagus.

          • LucindathePook

            Oh noes! Carry on.

        • OneYieldRegular

          Humiliating Expectations
          Little Dorrit With No Lunch Money
          A Cafeteria Dirge
          Barnaby Curmudgeonly Lunch Matron
          Nicholas Nickledanddimed
          A Tale of One Shitty Person

  • MynameisBlarney

    http://crooksandliars.com/files/imagecache/node_teaser/mediaposters/2017/07/36645.jpg

    “*Confused elderly man wanders away from limo, still has control of nuclear weapons.”

    *headline shamelessly purloined from Crooks and Liars

    • Ghenghis McCann

      “Grandpa Simpson 2020”

      • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

        Look at that screen cap and imagine Abe talking about wearing an onion on his belt.

  • Bub, the truculent Zombie

    Cue the men in white coats. Put the “president” in a nice soft room, where he can eat soft food with a cardboard spoon.

    https://youtu.be/hnzHtm1jhL4

    • Mildred Broxon

      You wouldn’t need a padded cell. Just a mirror-lined room with a large TV endlessly showing cheering crowds. He would never try to leave.

  • SayItWithWookies

    Jared and Steve usually shove him in the direction of the limo, but they were too busy trying to throw each other under the bus.

  • Ryan Denniston

    As much as I hate to inflict Chris Matthews on anyone, Monday’s episode was a holiday special where he looked back at 20 years of Trump interviews. What was really bizarre was listening to some of the late 90s, early 00s interviews, where it appears that he truly does understand and can articulate the effects of changes to the value of the dollar relative to other currencies. It is a marked change, and one that suggests to me at least something like dementia or some other affliction. Worth the watch (if you can stand Matthews at his worst).

    • BigCSouthside

      Just his speech patterns and his demeanor in interviews have drastically changed

    • cmd resistor

      Someone recently posted a clip of an interview with Connie Chung, maybe in the early 90’s? His assholeness came through but he spoke in complete sentences and followed a train of thought. One would not have looked at him and thought, hey, that guy should run for president, but he wasn’t a raving whatever.

    • Mildred Broxon

      One cannot even remark,
      O, what a noble mind is here o’erthrown
      Because he was always a narcissistic asshole, and none too bright withal.

  • TJ Barke

    Your “God emperor” is a feeble, senile, old idiot. Way to go trumptards.

  • Bill D. Burger
    • Joe Beese

      Kim’s head is almost a perfect sphere.

    • Celtic_Gnome

      Is that a cigarette in his hand? Doesn’t he know those things will stunt his growth?

  • schmannity

    Remember when W. was a national embarrassment? Good times.

    • Angela Ruzzo

      I remember what a klutz Gerald Ford was. Really good times.

  • anon_the_great

    Oh God, Oh God, Oh God…

  • therblig

    nonsense. it wasn’t even there until 15 seconds in when he double points and says “accio limo!”

  • Kiri the Unicorn

    Fortunately, there’s a Japanese zoo we can call. They’ve practiced for this.

    https://youtu.be/PgHQfxT7ImI

    • Mpeg

      That was so strange. Thanks!

    • Lance Thrustwell

      Why do I get the feeling that an actual escaped rhino might be, oh, just a tad faster and more unpredictable?

  • Nounverb911
    • Carpe Vagenda

      Yeah, but he doesn’t have the popular support Trump does with the fire breathers. I don’t think Congress would think twice about rolling over Pence to save their jobs.

    • jesterpunk

      Pence is bad but he is a politician and wont start another international incident with a tweet. There is no current good option its just a less shitty option thanks to purity ponies who couldnt be bothered to vote.

      • Apple Scruff

        Correct. I’m tired of this discussion that ‘Pence is worse’. He’s basic. We have dealt with his kind before. We can handle him.

        • jesterpunk

          Right? We made it through W and Cheney. Its not going to be great but we wont have to worry about him tweeting insults at everyone and attacking the press, making Nazis feel empowered or starting a war because of rude gestures.

      • Susan Szews

        Yep. Know what? Right now, I’m TOTALLY COOL with Pence. No more tweets about China doing a heavy on N. Korea. A-OK by me! Let’s do this thing starting yesterday.

        • Apple Scruff

          And also…. no more Trump family either!!! 45 goes, they all go! And Kellyanne, Bannon, and Huckabee, too.

    • Martini Ambassador 🍸

      My mantra is “one battle at a time.” We deal with that when we get there.

      ETA: um, thanks auto correct, but I didn’t mean “a hat.” 😒

    • Resistance Fighter Astraea

      I’m not in favor of ignoring the illegal acts and mental incapacity of a president out of fear of Mike fucking Pence.

    • BigCSouthside

      Pence has never enjoyed political popularity. He’d be controllable

      • Indivisible Snark Tank

        Not only that, but he’d have to admit that he was chosen for his job by a certifiably insane psychopath.

      • Nockular cavity

        He’s also dumb as a fucking rock. It’s not like he’s ever shown himself to be some kind of political strategist.

      • goingohm

        A Democratic House majority could render Pence “Occupant” of the White House for two years.

    • NastyBossetti

      I hate this argument. Sure, Pence is horrible in his own way. However, Trump can’t find his own car when it’s right in front of his face, he is mean and petty and gets bent out of shape when the world doesn’t bend to his will, he’s incredibly stupid, he stokes the fires of the worst inclinations in people, and we should be ok with him being in charge of our nuclear arsenal because… why??

    • MynameisBlarney

      I absolutely disagree that pence would actually be worse than turmp.
      He’s more willfully evil than turmp, but likely not nearly as easily manipulated.

      • Maggielle

        But he’d be more efficient, which at first glance seems good, since so many government jobs and appointments are waiting to be filled and little is happening. But Pence would re-stock everything with scary ideologues. But basically I hate this whole argument too.

    • shivaskeeper

      Pence is bad. Pence is an unpopular piece of shit as well. Pence was being cashiered in Indiana FFS. His political career was over. He has no friends in DC.

      Pence is a theocrat and a Dominionist. However when someone like him speaks about Judeo-Christian he means the land in Israel and not the actual Christ killing Jews, and his particular flavor of Christianity only. He may some fellow travelers among the other sects looking to ban abortion, or kick the LBGT community some more, or establish Christian white supremacy. But he would turn on them as fast as he would turn on anyone else not in his tribe. He knows it and they know it as well.

      Trump is horrible. But waiting to see if Pence goes down with him is stupid. One problem at a time. Deal with Trump, then deal with or contain Pence. After Pence it’s Ryan and I know people are banking on Speaker Pelosi after the midterms, but that hasn’t happened yet so don;t count on it. Then is would be Hatch, Tillerson, and Mnuchin on down the line. In fact there is only one in the order who would get skipped because she is ineligible to be President by being naturalized instead of native born.

    • PubOption

      God has never told Pence anything he didn’t want to hear.

  • Lyly Sirivong

    Remember when he said Hillary didn’t have the stamina to be president ?

    • Phoenixdoglover

      It is clear Drumpf is being worn down, as much by his self-inflicted wounds as by anything else.

  • azeyote

    what’s wrong with these meddlers – why don’t they just let him wander off? if he’s seeking help, he may just wander into an asylum with a padded room where there’s no t.v. – they would take good care of him there

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      Nanny Deep State!

  • data_ninja

    So is this the republican cutting of mental health services coming full circle, in a snake eating its own tail kind of way?

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      ‘you break it, you bought it.’

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

  • The pictures and videos of these sorts of incidents definitely show Trump with a vacant not-all-there expression — slack face and dull eyes.

    • Carpe Vagenda

      I really wonder how much they have him tranqued to keep him from blowing up in public.

      • Robbertjan Brandenburg

        Word on the streets says that they’ve hired Bill Cosby as his personal MD

    • cmd resistor

      Another one I remember was when he gave the speech for some executive order and then wandered toward the door instead of toward the “signing desk.”

      • shivaskeeper

        I was under the impression that was more anger over something than forgetting to sign it. He was pissed about the press corps or something that day.

        • cmd resistor

          A reporter did ask him a question (about some unrelated scandal), now that I remember, but I was thinking he was already heading toward the door when they did. But it was also one of those things that happened so fast you couldn’t really tell. But Pence kind of had to guide/pull him back in.

          • shivaskeeper

            But he didn’t come back. Pence grabber the EO and it got signed later in private.

  • rosenbomb

    Someone should take Trump to Siberia and let him wander off there. He could make friends with a tiger and stop destroying the world.

    • Doug Langley

      I think I saw the movie – “Life With Cake”.

  • Martini Ambassador 🍸

    Can we lose Drumpy in something analogous to long walk off a short pier situation? That would be so much winning by losing, we’d be great again.

    • george gonzalez

      It happened, to another moron, in “Being there”. Not that that makes it a bad idea. Painless and quick. Just sayin’.

  • Robbertjan Brandenburg

    I mentioned it on last night’s open thread and I will mention it again:

    They should put a fake busstop in front of the White house so in case he wanders off he will just be sitting there just like they do in Germany with alzheimers patients outside the hospital.

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/2071319/Fake-bus-stop-keeps-Alzheimers-patients-from-wandering-off.html

    • Susan Szews

      …would Trump know what a bus stop was, though?

      • Antonin Dvorak

        Just paint the sign gold and put a capital T on it.

        • Robbertjan Brandenburg

          There you go. Out of the box thinking.

      • Nockular cavity

        Just put some mannequins with bleached-blonde wigs and big tits out there. He’ll stop.

        • jowgajen

          I was thinking a semi truck with no keys.

  • Joe Beese
    • Up In Smoke O’hontas

      Say, you know who else hoped for a friendly welcome from Poland?

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Okay! Poland! There will be a meeting or two. They will appear before the press. Drumpf will be invited to say a few words. He will open his mouth and…

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        ‘have you heard all the jokes about you people? hilarious! seems there was this pollack…’

    • Pilotshark

      50K poles bused in to cheer trump,, be nice if they all stood and gave him a nice loud Bronx Cheer!

    • therblig

      as long as he doesn’t ask them why they so po’, he might be ok.

    • Yr. Gma

      He may be scouting for Melon’s replacement.

  • MynameisBlarney

    Meanwhilst, in Alaska…

    http://i.imgur.com/t9ADRak.jpg

    • Antonin Dvorak

      Nice boat you have there, it would be a shame if anything happened to it…

    • NastyBossetti

      It’s probably just the whale from the great 1977 film Orca.

    • Robbertjan Brandenburg

      Let them eat Palin.

    • Humpback whales are totally fucking with the fisherman on Long Island Sound. In the videos I’ve seen, it’s clear (at least to me) that they’re just doing it to harass them. They’re breaching uncomfortably close to the boats, and they’re not even looking for treats, since they eat krill.

      For no reason that anyone can fathom, we even get the occasional manatee (yes, manatee) here in New Haven Harbor. They seem to like it; they hang out for a while in August, then go back south. Go figure.

      • grindstone

        Dad blamed snow birds.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      Obama’s fault in 5..4…3….

    • Doug Langley

      Da-dum, da-dum . . .

  • shivaskeeper

    I made a joke about this one yesterday that the problem was the limo was blocking the cameras from seeing him so he tried to get back into the frame and not enough gold leaf on the car so how was he supposed to know it was for him..

    Re-watching this, it’s just sad. He really does have no idea that is the Presidential limo

    • TX Dept. of Space Tacos

      so, there’s a moment where he heads toward it at first and he’s back there, out of view of the camera, for a few moments and then starts wandering away.

      I REALLY want to know what happened in those few moments. “This giant limo with teh presidential seal can’t be for me.” It’s like when you walk up to a vehicle that’s the same, make, model and color as your in a parking lot.

      • LucindathePook

        I do that all the time, but then I quickly back away when I realize there is not a trash heap of books and papers and crap in the passenger seat as there should be.

        • NellCote71

          That’s me. My first thought is who cleaned out my car while I was in the store. In another case I have gotten into the unlocked car and wondered why it wouldn’t start, only to look up at the baffled car owner standing there with her shopping cart. And don’t get me started on my misappropriation of shopping carts (who put that pineapple in there while I wasn’t looking)?

    • Mildred Broxon

      He may never have seen a limo with a closed door before.

    • Maggielle

      You’d think his staff would know by now that they have to have someone stage-managing him at all times. I remember thinking something similar when Rubio was doing that State of the Union rebuttal and made that goofy grab for some water. An efficient, well-briefed staff should anticipate that shit. Not that I mind laughing at that shit.

      • Lori

        This was my thought when we first say this yesterday. POTUS has, or at least is supposed to haven a body man. That person is supposed to be very efficient and, among other things, able to make sure things like this don’t happen. Where is that person and why aren’t they doing their job? Are they just as lazy and incompetent as the rest of tRump’s staff or has the position not been filled yet or what?

        • Komsumverweigerer Ron

          if he’s aware that he’s degenerating, he might think having a dogsbody makes him look weak and incapable, not realising that NOT having one emphasises it even more

          • Lori

            Maybe, but it seems like it wouldn’t be that difficult to convince tRump that a body man is one of the perks of being POTUS (which it is) and that every POTUS has one (which they do) and that he’s a glorified step ‘n fetch it (which he isn’t supposed to be) and get tRUmp to go for it. Then the body man just needs to employ a tiny bit of subtlety–“Right this way Mr President, we have your favorite KFC waiting for you in the back,” and there’s nothing for the cameras to see.

          • Amy!

            On the other hand, if there is anything that Trump is known for doing well, that thing is not choosing top personnel for any particular job. Or getting along with anyone he employs.

          • NellCote71

            OR, they could tell him that Obama did not have a body man. . .

        • NellCote71

          I wonder if everyone is still so caught by surprise, they don’t anticipate. But you are right. They should. Although it is entertaining.

      • NellCote71

        I have been a lowly staff person in higher education all my adult life. Rule 1: Know your superiors’ vulnerabilities and compensate for them. One vp had low blood sugar, so if she was somewhere away from her stash, I kept nuts and frackers in my pocket or purse. In another instance a president would get dairy and diary mixed up, not a big problem unless you were at an ag school. So we had to write out the pronounciation in the speech. This is just common sense. You don’t want those in charge to look bad.

        Even though I enjoyed seeing him wander aimlessly, it seemed that they let his wandering go on a little too long. He needs to have someone at his elbow at all time.

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    Trump is even making Alec Baldwin nervous.

  • Canis Greyhame

    After the “where’s Rudy” clip, it seems obvious that he’s blind as a bat, but refuses to wear glasses (or contacts even) because that would be a sign of weakness.

    • marxalot

      Vanity. I have a theory that he got eye surgery back when it was first available, so that he didn’t have to wear glasses- for a time. The long term effects, however, of the early procedures include basically not being able to read anything less than 24-pt type and otherwise having severely warped vision.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      he should try wearing glasses. they make you look so SMRT!
      – Rick Perry

  • Les Appentis De la résistance

    The real question is – who is really running the country? Certainly not this dimented old guy.

  • Covfefe

    The issue isn’t whether you can indict a president; the issue is whether he’s mentally competent to stand trial.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      maybe he’s more cunning than we think, and he’s working on his insanity defense.

      • Mike Steele

        a little Vinnie the Chin schtick, perhaps?

  • Angela Ruzzo

    This is exactly what my father started doing in the early stages of dementia. He once walked into the bathroom in my house while I was in the shower, used the toilet, then turned the light off and closed the door when he left, plunging me into total darkness – totally oblivious to the fact that someone was in the shower. He would go outside the house and get into the wrong car. He would forget who he was talking to.

    • Phoenixdoglover

      Yep. Same sort of stuff with my Dad.

      Occasionally there would be a humorous incident in the middle of his inexorable decline. One morning he came storming out of the bedroom in his jockey shorts, and holding a balled up pair of pants. He ducked out to the side porch and threw the pants in the trash can, came back inside, and exclaimed, “Those pants don’t fit anymore!”

      My Mom investigated. They were her pants.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        The husband of a friend of mine does similar things. He is always accusing her of throwing his things away, or moving them, when they are right where he left them.

    • One of the things we saw was that my father would tend to lose his temper over simple questions, as if he thought we were testing him. One nephew had a school project of doing a genealogy, and was hurt when Dad yelled at him about it. We were able to get things calmed down, and then he went back and helped his grandson, but it was a shock.

      A lot of what Donnie is blurting on Twitter is likely to fall into that category, besides the fact that he’s always been an asshole.

      • Angela Ruzzo

        My father only became irritable when urged to bathe. For 2 years he refused to take a shower or shave at home. This was very odd because all his life he had been Mr. Clean – he often took 2 showers a day and was meticulous about shaving. When he finally had to go to a nursing home, he would become combative whenever they made him take a shower. It would take 2 male nurses to force him into the shower room and hold him down. We could never figure out why he suddenly took against bathing.

    • LucindathePook

      Oof, did the shower water run very hot all of a sudden?

      • Angela Ruzzo

        Fortunately not due to special shower valve, but the water pressure did drop.

    • SpideySenser

      My mom thought I was her little sister, who sadly died at the age of 8 (my mother was 12 at that time). It always makes me incredibly sad. My mom passed in 2003.

      • Eileen Besse

        So sorry. That IS sad….

  • Poly_Ester

    He must power down that big brain when he gets done tweeting. Rebooting it can be tricky.

    • Komsumverweigerer Ron

      it keeps looking for that 5 1/4 drive

      • JustDon’tSayShank

        8 inch drive LIBULZ!!!1

  • IdiokraticDrumpfenResistance
  • fawkedifiknow

    This may be the reason he won’t release his tax returns – he can’t find them.

  • Hemp Dogbane

    Sometimes I decide to just walk home. Then I change my mind and take the car.

    • Ghenghis McCann

      A neighbour of mine once reported his car stolen. He’d looked out of the window and it wasn’t parked outside his house. What had happened was that he’d driven it to the convenience store, and when he came out, forgot he’d driven there and walked home. (About 400 yards.)

      • JustDon’tSayShank

        wow. That sounds like something I would do, if the convenience store were that convenient.

      • laineypc

        I have driven to my kids’school for a meeting, started walking home (as is my habit- we live 1/2 mile away) and gotten almost all the way home before realizing I left the car back at the school.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      I was out with our then 18-month-old son, husband came out to meet us for dinner. Afterwards both my husband and I completely forgot I’d come out earlier and we got into his car and started driving home until our 18 MONTH OLD piped up “bye bye Mommy’s car!”

  • Phoenixdoglover

    Maybe this is why he always wants to take Melania’s hand.

  • Résistance Land Shark Ω

    This is a man who is stressed out and lost. He cannot keep this pace …

    • BMW

      “Stam-min-NUH!”

    • Steve Cole

      Low energy. Sad.

  • Duke

    “I’m directly across from you which in inconvenient for the tremendous, simply tremendous, ass kissing I’m about to give you.”

  • Now we know why Melania always walks behind him.

    Well, one reason.

  • marxalot

    This would be sad if it weren’t happening to an entire country. Also, sick burn, ‘Trix.

  • Johnatx

    My mom did the same. Wander away. Violent, unprovoked actions. Ended up in a hospice under restraint and sedated to keep her from harming herself. Fortunately, she wasn’t the most powerful person in the world and in command of a nuclear arsenal.

    • Lori

      I’m sorry about your mom.

      I get sort of pissed every time I think about how fast the leukemia killed mine, how little time we had with her at the end, but I know there are families how have had it much harder.

    • lucidamente

      Something similar happened to the mother of a friend of mine, and she was once the sweetest person in the world.

      I can’t imagine what will happen with Trump, who started out as a bully and a sociopath.

      • Komsumverweigerer Ron

        wouldn’t it be hilarious if it made him NICER?

        • Yr. Gma

          My father, a mean and violent SOB (sorry, grandma), had a series of strokes that turned him into this sweet old man no one recognized. It was very disconcerting.

      • Courser_Resistance

        Oh man, same here, the mother of a friend. Mean, vicious, nasty. My friend eventually find a safe place for her because having her in her home was just impossible. And she was actually much better once she was there.

  • OrdinaryJoe

    “Mild cognitive impairment

    As some people grow older, they have more memory problems than other people their age. This condition is called mild cognitive impairment, or MCI. People with MCI can take care of themselves and do their normal activities. MCI memory problems may include:

    -losing things often

    -forgetting to go to events or appointments

    -having more trouble coming up with words than other people of the same age..”

    • Beautiful Soup

      Coming up with words? Nobody does that like Trump! Covfefe, unpresidented, to name but 2.

      • Nasty Candy Apple

        Or every single time he opens his mouth.

    • BMW

      Wait….those symptoms are describing *me*.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      I’m 39, and this is my every day.

      • Jamoche

        I’ve always had the last one. Mom had a stroke about 15 years back and was all panicked – “Sometimes I can’t remember the word I want!” And I was all, yes, and? Isn’t that normal? Apparently not.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      This is actually the normal experience of any of us as we grow older. IT’s NORMAL. It’s completely different from Alzheimers, or dementia. The phrase that is often used is “normal aging is forgetting where you left your keys; Alzheimers is forgetting what keys are.” Trump isn’t exhibiting “mild cognitive impairment.” He’s exhibiting extreme mental illness and dementia.

      • Forgetting a word or going off on a tangent can also be caused by medication. I take anti-anxiety meds and they sometimes disrupt your thought processes. It’s so you don’t obsess over stuff.

      • OrdinaryJoe

        I’m not sure if it’s cognitive impairment, dementia, mental illness or he is just a big fucking asshole.

  • Bub, the truculent Zombie
    • Angry Red Bird DGAF

      Everyday, he becomes Presidential a new.

      • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

        President Camacho, that is.

  • Komsumverweigerer Ron

    can someone please just put him out of our misery?

    • BMW

      With votes.
      Impeachment votes.

    • Lord Jim

      Put him out of OUR misery, you meant, obvs.

  • Nasty Candy Apple

    If Hillary had done that, they’d never let us forget it.

    • OrdinaryJoe

      FauxNooz would be calling for 25th Amendment remedies while she was committed at Walter Reed for complete mental exam.

    • Roadstergal

      Hillary would have been impeached and drummed out of town in the first week if she had pulled this shit.

      (She wouldn’t have pulled this shit.)

    • NellCote71

      She stumbled on a step and the RWNJs went berserk, or berserker.

  • gkshenaut

    It would be interesting to test this, if Trump ever gives a news conference: have an early reporter ask him a question in which several facts are stated, then, after a delay, have a later reporter (or the same reporter) ask him to expand on his answer regarding whatever the first one asked him about. Sort of an impromptu delayed recall test. I personally would be relived if he remembered the earlier question without a lot of prompting.

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      He wouldn’t even be able to understand what it was about the first time.

    • Jamoche

      We already know everything he says is spur of the moment improv based on whatever he thinks the crowd wants.

  • Zonath

    Next time Trump starts wandering off, how about y’all just let him go?

  • BMW

    “It was later learned that President Trump had dementia. His suppporters at the time, though, continued condoning his erratic behavior and public statements. For them, it seemed, loyalty to Trump exceded their ability to see what was good for the nation.”
    -future historical texts

    • Lord Jim

      Loyalty to the Party comes first, comrade.

  • Mildred Broxon

    It’s eerie, the affection Republicans feel for politicians with dementia. They canonized Ronnie and have deified Trump. What is this thing called love?

    • NellCote71

      Love is love is love?

    • JulieCAC

      Baby, don’t hurt me no more…

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      It’s SO much easier to push through a vicious, greedy, self-serving, anti-American agenda when you have an idiot you can get to sign everything.

  • Ilgattomorte

    Well, we all know he can’t find his dick with both hands …

    … but on second thought, does that mean he lost it, or it’s just because of the size of his hands?

    • WIDTAP

      Must be the former. Word is that he is proportional to his small hands.

    • AnnieGetYerFun

      Inverted. I have heard.

    • Clark_Nova

      It’s behind his tie and sunken into 8″ of belly fat. Doubt he’s seen it in a decade.

  • OneYieldRegular

    So what just out of the camera’s view might have attracted his attention? It would be irresponsible not to speculate.

    • Manhattan123

      Airport pussy.

    • olady

      Three scoops.

  • guest

    If this happened late in the afternoon, Con45 is probably experiencing: Sundowning.

    The term “sundowning” refers to a state of confusion occurring in the late afternoon and spanning into the night. Sundowning can cause a variety of behaviors, such as confusion, anxiety, aggression or ignoring directions. Sundowning can also lead to pacing or wandering.

  • AnnieGetYerFun

    Squint, thought Trump to himself. Just keep squinting, that’s your “thinking” look. No one will know that you have no idea where you are.

  • Manhattan123

    His father got dementia. Not sure if that sort of thing is hereditary, but it might explain a lot. (His father was also a Nazi sympathizer, so that too).

  • Zippy W Pinhead

    No wonder he wants so badly to build that wall- to keep him from accidentally wandering into Mexico…

  • Spurning Beer

    So Donald has now lost the farm (repeatedly), the popular vote, the Presidential limo, Rudy, Bibi, his shit, his marbles, and his dignity.

    He’s still got his freedom, though, for now, because it’s just another word for nothin’ left to lose.

  • So, am I the only one who thought this was kinda’ scary?

    • Maybe if they replaced the Presidential Seal with TRUMP in yuge gold letters he might see it. Kinda scary? Yeah this is terrifying.

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    “Big, sleek, long black thing, laying directly in my way… Say, what is Obama doing out here, anyway? I better beat cheeks!”

    • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

      That is hilarious–probably exactly what he thought!

  • GHERKINS OF RESTIVENESS!

    Predisent Lost

    It’s getting scary, how he keeps losing things.
    Limos, popular votes…

  • Cat Cafe for the Prosecution

    What’s really horrifying to me is how EVERYONE AROUND HIM ACTS AS THOUGH EVERYTHING IS OKAY. If this was Grandpa, everyone would be sounding the alarm, taking his car keys away, talking about a nice assisted living situation or at least home care. But it’s the President, so no one says anything–and there’s literally the entire country if not the world at stake.

  • catnmus

    I think y’all are missing the point. Someone was wondering what was just out of the camera’s view, that he was headed toward. And that would be – The cameras themselves! He is drawn to them like a moth to a flame. You can see there’s a guy in a military suit that escorts him back toward the limo, and the guy opens the back door to the limo, and he just WALKS RIGHT PAST that guy. You can see that guy close the door again, and meanwhile, the guy on THIS side of the limo starts to open the limo door on this side. And what’s on this side of the limo? CAMERAS.

  • BreakingDeadMen

    There’s an opportunity here somewhere…maybe he can be tricked into walking into a prison cell for the next three years.

  • SeeTrain65

    “Mr. President, please don’t touch that. You should get some sleep.”

    “But I want to see what the big red button does!”

  • FelineMama

    I wish the SS guy would have let him keep walking. I’d be curious where he’d go.

  • Jamoche
  • Whollyholeyholy

    Gawd. If he had fallen down the stairs he would have landed in the car. And yet…

  • Celtic_Gnome

    This is all easily explained. He was looking for “his” car.

    “His” car would be solid gold, with a giant “T” on it. That car was black, with a teeny tiny seal of the President of the United States on the door.

    It could happen to anyone.

  • Alex Grey

    He was confused when the stairs didn’t move, and he actually had to walk down them.

  • Zyxomma

    Next, he’ll get lost at the G-20, I suppose.

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