Optimize Literally Everything

Today is National Coming Out Day!

I have nothing to declare.

My friends are all going into the red line at Customs with their guns and swords and dial-a-yield suitcase nukes, and all I have are the plastic butter knives of polyamory and BDSM.

Maybe it’s not vanilla, but it’s sorta, you know, Trader Joe’s 73% dark chocolate flavored with organic orange peel.

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