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/r/gentlemanboners is really creepy (self.Negareddit)

alawa が 投稿

I can't put my finger on why, but something seems off about it. Maybe the idea that sexualizing nonsexual photos is "gentlemanly" or just the name of the subreddit

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[–]ThatQuietSeriousGuy 24 ポイント25 ポイント  (6子コメント)

I got curious about it so I investigated a little. LadyBoners was created on January 30th 2011. GentlemanBoners was created later, on April 3rd 2011. Maybe one name is based on the other.

[–]FixinThePlanetdoin a addicsun AMA 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's what I thought too! Hah

[–]alawa[S] 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Yeah, that's true. Although I think there is a difference in that ladyboners is kinda a jokey name, whereas gentleman boners just sounds creepy.

[–]throwaway03022017SAXOPHONE! [スコア非表示]  (3子コメント)

Even if the latter is a play on the former?

[–]afinesocia1ife [スコア非表示]  (2子コメント)

Kind of like how r/earthporn became a whole network of sfw-porn subs, including r/humanporn. Which sounds weird unless you know the entire backstory of its name as well as reddit "culture" (ugh). Reddit is derivative. There are few original things on this website. Any that are become quickly adopted and endlessly repeated, until they are just as trite as the rest of the site.

[–]throwaway03022017SAXOPHONE! [スコア非表示]  (1子コメント)

That's the biggest downside of the upvote/downvote system.

[–]thirteensigmapi 53 ポイント54 ポイント  (6子コメント)

I think the implication that to be a "gentleman" is to be attracted to wealthy, thin, white women is pretty insidious

[–]someguywithanaccount 18 ポイント19 ポイント  (4子コメント)

I think it's this combined with another comment in this thread. Somehow getting off to this ridiculous notion of what a woman "should" be makes you classier than getting off to naked people.

First, why are you so uncomfortable with admitting you like attractive naked people? Second, why is your view of a "proper" woman so specific and homogenous?

That said, I personally enjoy some of the pictures posted there (okay, a lot, those women are beautiful). But the concept and name of the sub make me feel weird enough I don't visit it.

[–]cllegionanarcho-farrier 71 ポイント72 ポイント  (40子コメント)

Its porn for neckbeards who've decided they are above porn.

[–]alawa[S] 42 ポイント43 ポイント  (38子コメント)

In a weird way watching porn seems more normal. Like getting a boner from porn is a normal response; getting a boner from a woman just existing is weird. It's like women can't even wear a nice dress without this bullshit.

[–]someguywithanaccount 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Ehhh, I've always found the sub a little weird too, but I'm not sure I agree with your logic. Plenty of women like looking at pictures of hot actors and find them arousing. In fact I'd say my female friends enjoy non-nude photographs more than my male friends (based of a small sample size). That doesn't seem inherently creepy.

[–]alawa[S] 16 ポイント17 ポイント  (1子コメント)

That's fair. I think the creepyness for me mostly comes from the name.

[–]someguywithanaccount 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Agreed. I posted something to that effect elsewhere in this thread.

[–]throwaway03022017SAXOPHONE! [スコア非表示]  (2子コメント)

Dude can't control whether or not he gets an erection. He can control how he reacts to the situation.

[–]AlwaysTryAgain 36 ポイント37 ポイント  (7子コメント)

I think it's the belief that it's somehow more classy to drool over nonsexualized photos.

It's like when someone says "I will not rape you if you fall unconscious" at a party as if it is a highlight point and not a default presumption of common decency.

[–]buriedinthyeyes 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (6子コメント)

belief that it's somehow more classy

Of course. Because there's nothing classier than jerking off to women who didn't consent to it.

[–]throwaway03022017SAXOPHONE! [スコア非表示]  (5子コメント)

Wait you have to get consent to jerk it to a woman now? That's ridiculous. Privacy of your own home, jerk it to whoever you want.

[–]aleksndrars [スコア非表示]  (4子コメント)

Yeah, its creepy to masturbate to peoples non sexual photos

[–]Isolatedwoods19 [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

What if you're picturing them in your head or fantasizing? Because everyone does that and it isn't much different, our brains are very capable of creating complex pictures.

[–]throwaway03022017SAXOPHONE! [スコア非表示]  (2子コメント)

Agreed. But it's ridiculous to expect people to ask permission or just stop, are you serious?

[–]aleksndrars [スコア非表示]  (1子コメント)

Not really? I would block any one so fast if i found out they did that to me

[–]throwaway03022017SAXOPHONE! [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

I don't blame you, but that's about all you can do.

[–]FixinThePlanetdoin a addicsun AMA 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I thought it was the flip of ladyboners

[–]MurderMelon 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I think everybody in this thread is reading WAYYY too far into it. "Gentlemanly" doesn't mean wealthy/white/thin and i definitely don't think the people who frequent the sub (I am one of them) think themselves to be any better than any other porn-watcher.

The whole idea is that women in nice dresses and classy settings are attractive. That's it. Nothing more, nothing less. Different people get their rocks off with different visual stimuli and it's kinda fucked up to say that people are lesser or creepy just because they like looking at women in classy attire.

[edit] Yeah, I mean, I guess the name is kinda cringey and stupid. But other than that, this post/discussion makes no sense.

[–]afinesocia1ife [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

With you 100%. As god-awful as reddit can be, it's just a derivative of something slightly more clever, but with no regard for context or the thing that made the original basis endearing in the first place.

It's based on r/LadyBoners, which tended to post pictures of clothed but attractive men. A gentleman tends to be the male counterpart to a lady, except gentlemen actually tend to have penises, so the joke about ladies getting metaphorical boners falls totally flat. Because redditors are notoriously inept at discerning what is socially appropriate (or think the "culture" makes them part of a secret club, so let what would otherwise be unacceptable things slide).

It is far less insidious than people here want to frame it. It had nothing to do originally with the posters feeling like gentlemen, or even getting boners. It was just a place to post attractive women.

Of course that mutated and attracted a weird kind of community after a while, but most people are fucking weird, and anonymity brings out the worst in what we would otherwise consider decent people. Reddit does less than most sites to deal with these things when they crop up, so it also serves as a feedback loop that normalizes this deviant behavior.

[–]theonlyjh 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I don't see how a group of people congregating online to discuss finding famous celebrities attractive is somehow excessively creepy.

Virtually everyone does it in real life men AND women. It's not even like they are super gross about it most of the time. Sure the name is crude but it's a non-issue really.

[–]StumbleOna better one that isn't lame 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Assuming you aren't a troll:

It's the lie of it. It's an objectification sub, sure. That's fine there are plenty. But this one in particular uses language that pretends it isn't. It gives off the Nice Guy vibe. There is a veneer of politness about their language masking the vulgarity beneath. It doesn't matter that they pretend to be a little bit higher class. At least when guys are screaming SHOW US YOUR TITS they are being honest about it. The gaze still exists.

[–]Isolatedwoods19 [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

And it was created in response to r/ladyboners, which is a bit cringy itself but whatever.

[–]Ghastlycitrus [スコア非表示]  (0子コメント)

Definitely the former.