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Academic studies and countless anecdotes make it clear that being interrupted, talked over, shut down or penalized for speaking out is nearly a universal experience for women when they are outnumbered by men./r/all (nytimes.com)

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[–]ladosu1 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (9子コメント)

Countless anecdotes... That would make it anecdotal evedence and therefore bullshit.

Waiting for mods to delete this lol

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    [–]The_Dork-uh-Whale 38 ポイント39 ポイント  (11子コメント)

    Men frequently interrupting women even happens in the Supreme Court.

    [–]druglawyer 248 ポイント249 ポイント  (8子コメント)

    Supreme Court.

    Am lawyer. Listen to supreme court arguments fruequently. That article, although widely reported, is perhaps the most misleading garbage I've ever seen. What looks like an "interruption" in the transcript, is in fact, if you listen to the actual audio, nothing more than multiple Justices beginning a question at the same time. Nobody interrupts a Justice, it's complete fucking nonsense.

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      [–]brokendownprism 44 ポイント45 ポイント  (7子コメント)

      Damn as a woman, I'm not this fucking weak.

      As if women don't interrupt, shout down and make people feel insecure as well in a professional setting.

      Soft bigotry of low expectations.

      [–]Redcrux -3 ポイント-2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

      I find that when I speak less, I get heard more. If someone won't let me get a word in I just figure they aren't interested in what I have to say and I walk away. That's not a big deal to me but might affect them in the long run if it's relevant to something they need. If I was saying something because I need them to know then I find another way to get the information across like email or I just make do without their input.

      People who have this problem either care way too much about what other people think of them (lack of confidence) or think what they have to say is vastly important and needs to be said (big ego).

      [–]Eye_farm_downvotes 23 ポイント24 ポイント  (22子コメント)

      Yes. It is the same the other way around too.

      When one group is outnumbered by another, they are overlooked. Basic human behavior.

      Minorities tend to be ignored by majorities...

      [–]BodaShandis -5 ポイント-4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

      I never knew I was a woman

      [–]DredThis 16 ポイント17 ポイント  (5子コメント)

      Ummm. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1182327/

      [–]Sly_Mong00se -4 ポイント-3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

      Interrupted talked over and shut down are the same thing, yes?

      [–]sonicssweakboner 44 ポイント45 ポイント  (2子コメント)

      I'm just glad this post isn't "today I did this and I'm so proud of myself"

      [–]miparasito 40 ポイント41 ポイント  (16子コメント)

      I feel as though there are two kinds of interrupting. Constructive interruption builds on or clarifies what the person is saying, and it's an important part of collaboration. These are little sidesteps, but the person speaking knows they are being heard and can still move forward.

      Destructive interruption shuts down or sidetracks. These comments are dismissive ("That won't work"), sudden shifts in topic or may be a power move to essentially shift the floor to themselves. These interruptions undermine the credibility of the speaker and act like dams, they make it harder (or impossible) for the speaker to get back on track.

      [–]I'd like to buy a vowelSimplyTheWorsted 91 ポイント92 ポイント  (15子コメント)

      Constructive interruption builds on or clarifies what the person is saying, and it's an important part of collaboration. These are little sidesteps, but the person speaking knows they are being heard and can still move forward.

      I think this kind of interrupting might seem constructive, but in a formal, workplace setting (rather than one-on-one in a brainstorming session, or in a more informal environment) this smacks of condescension. Being interrupted so that someone else can explain your point for you? Clarifying an idea you hadn't finished stating yet? Telling you you're heard while preventing you from actually speaking? None of that is constructive.

      [–]nas_said_wtf 91 ポイント92 ポイント  (110子コメント)

      Sigh I just want people to get along. There's enough world problems as is. We should be helping each other not fighting each other

      [–]parading_goats 48 ポイント49 ポイント  (78子コメント)

      This is your response to sexism or complaints about sexism?

      [–]meta_sequoia 14 ポイント15 ポイント  (12子コメント)

      Could you be clear - what is the "fighting" you're referring to? Men shouldn't be disrespecting women by interrupting them more than other men? Or is the problem that someone is pointing this out and suggesting it should change?

      [–]fap_nap_fap 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (5子コメント)

      Great comment, I agree 100%

      [–]_iwasneverhere_ 103 ポイント104 ポイント  (7子コメント)

      I think there is a serious problem of primate ape brain operating in the modern world. Things like this conversation only happen when you emotionally invest in the tribe and contest another. Republicans and Democrats, boys and girls, team jocob vs team edward the world is so much easier when we can focus all conflicts into us vs them. Everyone in this thread knows that there are shades of grey and we are all just people but when you point at articles that say men are assholes for no reason it sparks the defensive side of men which sparks the indignation of women which will entrench everyone and you get this crap all over again.

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        [–]lexabear 291 ポイント292 ポイント  (15子コメント)

        ITT: "All interruptions matter."

        Can't believe so many top-level comments all immediately go to "but the menz". Or "but I once talked to a woman and she interrupted me so therefore this entire field of study is wrong."

        [–]blahwomanblah 699 ポイント700 ポイント  (117子コメント)

        This would explain my recent job interview. It was an interview for the same work I had already been doing very successfully at a fortune 100 company for several years. I was interviewing for a job at different company because of the location. My resume and references were amazing. The recruiter basically told me I had the job and the interview was a formality.

        A panel of five men. Two of which ruthlessly interrogated me on my experience, kept interrupting and wouldn't let me elaborate on how we had semantic differences between our companies but the meaning was the same. Asshats. The best part was the most vicious offender is from a machismo culture and then proceeded to mansplain how soft skills were important for the job. I couldn't help but fume inside.

        My recruiter was shocked when I recounted the interview. Needless to say, they didn't hire me...to do a job I've done amazingly well for years at a better company.

        Nearly every week of my 10 year career I lament being a woman. Treading the line between meek and assertive like a fucking tightrope watching men with poorer outcomes, poorer social skills advance. I didn't need a book to tell my there are so few women leaders. You need only experience it for a few years.

        And FYI to the trending post in /r/askmen, the reason why women believe there is a problem with the "bitchy" perception isn't because they're poor leaders, though there are plenty who are. Its very telling when you are respected by your team, by your subordinates, by your leaders and then you switch groups and feel the instant change. It takes time, energy and commitment to break down those biases and once you do, you feel "home" amongst your team. And you really feel your disadvantage when interacting with those you haven't taken the monumental effort of building a reputation and rapport. And that monumental effort is the difference - the amount I have had to do vs my peers to gain the same level of respect.

        [–]notochord 126 ポイント127 ポイント  (23子コメント)

        Yep. I read so many books on how to act around men at work. Still, a man with less experience and no degree got promoted over me.

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          [–]The70sUsername 395 ポイント396 ポイント  (22子コメント)

          And that monumental effort is the difference - the amount I have had to do vs my peers to gain the same level of respect.

          This. I worked in a heavily male dominated industry at an entry level. In the deep south, redneck culture. About as sexist as it gets these days. The battle to be seen as a competent person is the problem. I was told "work circles around the boys!" Why? Why the fuck am I having to literally do 3x the work just to be seen as capable? Wouldn't that mean that "the boys" are whole incapable and should be let go or given hell for being 1/3rd as productive as a single person (me)?

          Then there was the fact that I had to fight to be able to do my job. I worked with power tools, it was in the job description. I had to argue for my right to use them. Once I'd managed to get my hands on it, I knew I couldn't so much as a take a break because needing/wanting a break meant I was just overwhelmed by the work, naturally.

          There were guys who started the exact same day as me, coming form the exact same school (literally we shared a class, it was trade school), with less field experience and were accepted into the fold as if they'd always been there.

          On the contrary I was told that my previous experience made me "harder to train." What? Granted he was meaning in terms of training for the job, but still, what?

          My favorite moment was when three guys were trying to figure out how high temperature would make the thickness reading on a piece of piping change. They hypothesized that the heat would cause it to expand outward (in radius), but the thickness should stay the same.

          They were failing to grasp that the heat would have expanded the inner wall itself, rather than the entire radius of the pipe. Essentially how a donut's hole looks much large before it's cooked, but after the dough expands the hole is smaller and the surrounding doughnut is much thicker.

          I explained this in plain English same as I did above. They literally responded with blanks stares, and turned to continue talking to each other as if I hadn't just answered the question they'd been debating for over an hour.

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            [–]Meownowwow 312 ポイント313 ポイント  (23子コメント)

            Reads post title - the comments are going to be all men saying that since they have been interrupted at some point in their life - therefore this is not a problem

            Reluctantly checks comments FML - Reddit whats the point of this sub anymore?

            [–]parading_goats 437 ポイント438 ポイント  (49子コメント)

            That's kind of how TwoX is as a default. The comments here already demonstrate the problem.

            [–]Careful_Houndoom 156 ポイント157 ポイント  (35子コメント)

            I kind of want to see the other side (That is not to discredit this article).

            At one job I used to work at for a short while I was the only male on staff with like 8 females. I could barely function because I was so paranoid about a sexual harassment claim that I never walked out of the vision of security camera's, or spoke unless spoken to.

            Does just being outnumbered by either side play negatively on a person?

            [–]quickhorn 246 ポイント247 ポイント  (12子コメント)

            I think there's a difference between having an experience that someone has and an internalized fear. If nearly every man that worked with a majority of women faced a sexual harassment claim, then I think we could compare experiences. That's not the case.

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                [–]wonderfuladventure 65 ポイント66 ポイント  (2子コメント)

                Hey! I'm doing research on this topic just now. It's very interesting and honestly it seems to have gotten better as times goes on. We, as a society, are aware of these problems and are individually addressing them. There still is some way to go though.

                [–]somepeoplewait 417 ポイント418 ポイント  (27子コメント)

                ITT: People who don't understand that exceptions exist but they don't disprove the results of studies.

                [–]Chiffmonkey 89 ポイント90 ポイント  (5子コメント)

                I used to get called shy for not doing it (it results in never getting to speak).

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