So the way nouns got gender - long story short, originally there was one set of nouns. For pragmatic reasons these naturally separated into nouns that typically did things and nouns that so rarely did things their nominative form was forgotten or supplanted by the accusative.
Then there was a subset of nouns that were abstract groups of things and they got a special suffix. That abstract ending applied to nouns like aqua (how do you have one water? two water?) and from there it leaped to certain weird abstract words formed from verbs. From there it generalized after birth-giver more or less, and agreement rules made adjectives rhyme with nouns at least if they were thematic (ending in a vowel).
I convey this more quickly by “feminine gender doesn’t mean a spoon is feminine, it means the word spoon declines like the word woman” but it never works because people are not /really/ talking about linguistics when they want to make these accusations