上位 200 件のコメント表示する 500

[–]DraculixBoss[M] [スコア非表示] stickied comment (41子コメント)

We consider linking to user accounts on external websites to be a form of doxxing.

I'm banning anyone who links to her Instagram account. Don't do it.

[–]piratesas 4131 ポイント4132 ポイント  (10子コメント)

Jesus Christ, this isn't Chaturbate. Reddit gold doesn't give you actual money.

[–]tyen0 542 ポイント543 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Maybe she thinks all the "I'm poor" comments will encourage someone to give her money.

[–]RealCoolGal 3159 ポイント3160 ポイント  (67子コメント)

Deleted her account when it hit r/all

[–]TheBiggestZander 256 ポイント257 ポイント  (53子コメント)

Was she famous or something? Like.. instagram famous?

[–]Agent_Dutchess 733 ポイント734 ポイント  (49子コメント)

Her username is buried somewhere in the comments here but she deleted her Insta too lol

Edit: insta may still be up. Maybe she had a nervous breakdown without seeing a dick pic inboxed to her in over 43 minutes and reactivated it.

[–]geesehater22 126 ポイント127 ポイント  (24子コメント)

Her username is buried somewhere in the comments here but she deleted her Insta too lol

Don't they want followers on insta? I would try to get on r/all and get people to sign up. This is weird.

[–]tyme 5787 ポイント5788 ポイント  (81子コメント)

Lady, you came to /r/roastme and are defending yourself in reply to negative comments. Do you not understand the purpose of this sub?

[–]Hate_them_chiggers 1469 ポイント1470 ポイント  (13子コメント)

There should definitely be more digs on her intelligence.

[–]tehBrandonJayyay 367 ポイント368 ポイント  (31子コメント)

What were her comments like? She deleted her account

[–]zbyte64 451 ポイント452 ポイント  (9子コメント)

"teehee thank you blah blah excuse"

Excuses include: German heritage, masculine face

[–]throwawayforporn93 5445 ポイント5446 ポイント  (79子コメント)

I don't know why you insist and doing Q&A videos on Instagram. No one gives a shit. We follow you because you're hot, but you're not interesting. Stop deluding yourself.

[–]havereddit 794 ポイント795 ポイント  (9子コメント)

The plucked-off-and-then-drawn-back-on eyebrows. Soooo not hot...

[–]Get_Over_Here_Please 216 ポイント217 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I do not understand that idea, they wanted to be roasted... and the photo they chose had drawn on eyebrows. Like, were we supposed to focus on that? Was it a trap?!

[–]hascogrande 6962 ポイント6963 ポイント  (77子コメント)

posts on RoastMe

deletes account after 6 hours

[–]Nixus 8134 ポイント8135 ポイント  (76子コメント)

Deleted account, internet still undefeated.

[–]Firecracker500 385 ポイント386 ポイント  (39子コメント)

Has the internet ever lost against a roastee?

[–]bojang1es 339 ポイント340 ポイント  (5子コメント)

The moment you try to win against the internet you've already lost. The internet always wins, the challenger should only ever be playing for a mutual victory.

[–]BluFoot 176 ポイント177 ポイント  (23子コメント)

Yeah there was that one post where the roastee made insane comeback after comeback. I'll try to find it.

[–]awhaling 1937 ポイント1938 ポイント  (4子コメント)

You came here to get low-key complimented, then when people actually roasted you you feel the need to explain why they are wrong, because you're too insecure to laugh it off.

Roll with the punches. It's a roast me, not secretly compliment me in the disguise of an insult.

[–]myvoyacc 2938 ポイント2939 ポイント  (21子コメント)

Everything about this is way too intentional for the "fuck it" pageantry. You want people to think you just wrote some shit down down on a card, snapped a quick photo, and threw it to the virgins to shout out your fake tits as masked compliments? It takes more bravery for some regular ass teenager to snarl their brace-face in homeroom than it does for your fake fuck it Instagram lite compliment fishing trip.

[–]sendme5seewhathappen 645 ポイント646 ポイント  (16子コメント)

Instagram lite compliment fishing trip.

it's funny because she posted it on instagram too.

[–]LinkReincarnat3 4128 ポイント4129 ポイント  (36子コメント)

That ring light you used for your selfie makes your eyes and narcissism really pop.

[–]DakFayden4http://redd.it/5n8wsh 7945 ポイント7946 ポイント  (72子コメント)

You look like someone who would spend 2 hours on your hair and makeup and take about 50 selfies just to post on r/roastme because you think you'll be the first person in the history of this sub to be so hot that nobody can think of a bad thing to say about you, but that has never happened.

You look like the kind of person who frequents loud dance clubs because the loudness puts you on a level playing field with people who are interesting to talk to.

[–]demuratrix 1168 ポイント1169 ポイント  (44子コメント)

I think you just made me understand why some people go clubbing so much. Sure it's fun to dance and get drunk and get laid, but there's also no pressure to be intelligent, just pressure to be sexy.

EDIT: God I am so full of regret. My life is in a downward spiral and I don't know which way is up to swim for air. I deeply regret my many failures and flaws.

[–]Hipporack 415 ポイント416 ポイント  (2子コメント)

That first sentence ran on like the list of her ex's that won't speak to her anymore.

[–]Neice_Ex_Throwaway 6380 ポイント6381 ポイント x2 (237子コメント)

Are Ex's allowed to post? Well, here it goes:

You wish you were a real actress so people couldn't see right through you. You look like your major in college was gold digging. You might be able to marry rich if you knew what to do with a dick when you see one. You're so desperate for attention you've gone from self-posting on r/prettygirls and r/goddesses to r/roastme. Your little shit of a purse dog is the only true loyalty you'll ever find, and even that is contingent on you continuing to feed it. Your tattoos of guns pointing at your vagina are probably there because the dumb-ass guys you've had to settle for need instructions in finding it under that Demi Moore-inspired bush of yours. You flossed your eyebrows more than a dentist flosses his teeth. Your nipples look like they had a fight with each other and are hiding on the opposite sides of your boobs. You obviously can't take criticism. You will die alone.

[–]trynottolose 1989 ポイント1990 ポイント  (3子コメント)

shit... the other ones were personal, but this one was personal personal

[–]axialclown 767 ポイント768 ポイント  (11子コメント)

Goddam. Roasted, toasted and then discarded.

[–]FinishTheSente 121 ポイント122 ポイント  (6子コメント)

Holy fucking shit. I haven't seen such epic obliteration since NYC at the end of the first Avengers movie. God damn.

[–]JohnStamosBRAH 677 ポイント678 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Holy shit bruh... Even I feel bad reading this.

10/10

[–]i_like_turtles_1969 237 ポイント238 ポイント  (17子コメント)

Fucking hell. If it wasn't for that roast that got gilded 6 or 7 times this would be the best one.

[–]Neice_Ex_Throwaway 256 ポイント257 ポイント  (13子コメント)

Late to the party, but had to take the opportunity. I mean, what are the freaking odds? I didn't even start in on the medications or addictions. .

[–]AutisticAnal 2129 ポイント2130 ポイント  (14子コメント)

Too bad there's no kind of surgery that can make you smarter or more interesting.

[–]CookiesNCremation 1394 ポイント1395 ポイント  (7子コメント)

Sex dolls have become so realistic these days.

[–]PMMeYourWits 5745 ポイント5746 ポイント  (19子コメント)

Her: Gimme that I have no skills and need to marry for money look

Team of plastic surgeons: Say no more

[–]Cowpatty96http://redd.it/6ag1am 805 ポイント806 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Houston, we have a problem. The right side of the landing pad is higher. Please advise.

[–]TheMasterFatman 2010 ポイント2011 ポイント  (12子コメント)

I'd roast you, but I don't have the $350 you charge per hour.

[–]HoodHimself 10.4k ポイント10.4k ポイント  (69子コメント)

Wannabe Instagram model looking for work. Has GED and likes how everyone is always so nice. Talents include: PICS. Skilled in taking 3hrs to set up a selfie to look spontaneous, and makeup. Will do "whatev's" for money or coke.

[–]JohnnyDarkside 1713 ポイント1714 ポイント  (28子コメント)

The ol' "Bae caught me..." model. Nobody cares enough to actually invest time since she screams "don't stick your dick in crazy" so she just spends all her free time coming up ways of trying to take creative selfies until she finally to start going full instagram model and shows more and more before finally just becoming a cam slut.

[–]LinkUnseen 404 ポイント405 ポイント  (26子コメント)

And then has a public meltdown on camera in line at a Subway, revealing that she's not in that great of shape anymore

[–]Jolly_Rodger 210 ポイント211 ポイント  (6子コメント)

She even has a professional light rig just for this kind of attention. You can see the circular led lights in her eyes.

[–]MaxineSilver 828 ポイント829 ポイント  (7子コメント)

theres more makeup on your cleavage, and thats saying something

[–]Bcron 57 ポイント58 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This post is a train wreck lmao, you can even see her left arm pulling the back of her shirt, make those things POP.

Most try-hard "fuck it" I've ever witnessed

[–]PURPLEDONGOFTHANOS 549 ポイント550 ポイント  (12子コメント)

I occasionally lurk r/all and have never really paid attention to /r/roastme, but this is one of the best fucking threads ive ever stumbled upon. She straight deleted her account.

[–]Alex_GordonAMA 9153 ポイント9154 ポイント  (42子コメント)

You are one of those girls that I'll come across on Instagram, remember that I'm horny, then go and find the actual hot ones to jerk off too.

[–]halfachainsaw 4276 ポイント4277 ポイント  (17子コメント)

Like passing a taco bell and going "oh yeah I was gonna grab chipotle"

[–]Alex_GordonAMA 2555 ポイント2556 ポイント  (8子コメント)

Exactly. Taco Bell is fine when I'm drunk and nothing else is open. Just like her.

[–]asiansteevhttp://redd.it/4xf4r1 1625 ポイント1626 ポイント  (5子コメント)

we get it, you learned contouring

[–]Syliase 249 ポイント250 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Your foundation is warmer than your skin tone, and I can see where you edited your waist/underbust to make yourself look skinnier. 1/10 effort

[–]millface1 3329 ポイント3330 ポイント  (54子コメント)

I bet the title of this post is roughly 66% of your active vocabulary. The other 33% being the word "me".

[–]king-guy 573 ポイント574 ポイント  (48子コメント)

What's the 1%?

[–]sjmp75020 8811 ポイント8812 ポイント  (89子コメント)

That's not cleavage it's the Silicon Valley.

[–]dadbod615 565 ポイント566 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Your cleavage almost took my gaze away from that perfectly square ass forehead.

[–]str8emulated 713 ポイント714 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Don't let all these comments get you down, you will make some kind of well off guy a wonderful participation trophy wife someday.

[–]sendme5seewhathappen 1120 ポイント1121 ポイント  (23子コメント)

You look like every basic ass Kardashian wannabe in this world, draw your eyebrows in thicker please. Just the sight of you screams insecurity to me, you hate yourself and anytime a male compliments you they lose value in your eyes. You spent two hours getting ready to take this picture and have no plans to even leave the house today. You'll fuck your fill of badboys and then right at 30 settle down with a guy who has been chasing you for years. He'll think he has hit the jackpot, little does he know you aren't worth the sheets he fucks you on. You will continue to get your fill of sexually satisfying attention from other guys over social media and private messaging apps like Kik while sitting in the Mercedes he buys you. Eventually you'll have a kid, locking this lifestyle in for life, only misbehaving every once in a while when you've had too much to drink. You'll probably fuck some of his friends or worse, family, just because you can't help but be a dirty slut after a few drinks. He'll forgive you because he's a bitch.

edit: gooby pls

[–]dis_is_amazin 183 ポイント184 ポイント  (8子コメント)

Fuck me this is the top tier roast in the thread for me. Others have been generally on point but you just spelt out the most depressing parts of the next 15 years of her life with with such accuracy and ease.

If I had gold it would be for you.

[–]LocusRothschild 977 ポイント978 ポイント  (13子コメント)

You look like Kate Beckinsale if she were a 38 year old strung out Vegas stripper.

[–]L0kdoggie 438 ポイント439 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Don't say that, Kate Beckinsale doesn't have to suck in her cheeks like this to look pretty.

[–]bulldogg76 509 ポイント510 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I can't decide wether drugs or your 96 year old "husband" is gonna tear that body up first.

[–]Bencil7 348 ポイント349 ポイント  (3子コメント)

roasted yourself by deleting your account...

[–]ComplexChristian 332 ポイント333 ポイント  (4子コメント)

She couldn't bear with the honest truth in the comments so she deleted her account LMAO.

[–]kcdale99 170 ポイント171 ポイント  (2子コメント)

This was one savage roast.... wow. As a professional photographer I work with this type of person often, and some of these are deep cutting indeed.

Been a while since a roastme has made me cringe just a bit (but in the right way).

[–]dietotaku 149 ポイント150 ポイント  (2子コメント)

you have more fake eyelashes glued to your face than you have IQ points.

[–]bjh182http://redd.it/403ij0 1698 ポイント1699 ポイント  (23子コメント)

Looks like Jared Leto is playing another transvestite in his new movie

[–]r0b0nd7 135 ポイント136 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Those eyes are emptier than your dead octopus's tank. And that is the most research I've ever had to do for RoastMe.

[–]aylmao43 388 ポイント389 ポイント  (4子コメント)

deleted her reddit account and went back to the Periscope echo chamber where she's showered in compliments by white knights and orbiters. Guess she never expected what she thinks about herself deep down to be posted here by random people.

Probably still reading here while the losers on periscope go unanswered and can't figure out why they never get the attention they deserve.

[–]Redzombie78 85 ポイント86 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Oh you know she's still reading this shit. She can't help herself when she's the topic.

[–]WestshoreJayhttp://redd.it/50fhhi 270 ポイント271 ポイント  (1子コメント)

You look like the only thing you know how to add is more makeup.

[–]employmentpages 128 ポイント129 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Underneath the three pounds of makeup and pushup bra you are just another boring bitch that probably likes The Chainsmokers and insisted on the unicorn frappe from Starbucks. Also known as basic.

[–]ajd011394http://redd.it/56tu17 110 ポイント111 ポイント  (1子コメント)

fuck it

No thanks

[–]wrestledwithbear 92 ポイント93 ポイント  (0子コメント)

The human incarnation of narcissism. You spend 2 hours on your makeup every morning because deep down you know that without the plastic facade that is your attractiveness, people would see that you are as empty, shallow and worthless as a garbage bag. And at least a garbage is good for putting trash in, what good do you do for the planet, or humanity? You've probably never thought about it. All you ever think about is how many likes on instagram you can get, as if that's some measure of worth, as if it justifies the Oxygen you take from the air, and the resources you consume that could go to people who actually have something to offer to humanity.

[–]paross 27.6k ポイント27.6k ポイント x14 (1011子コメント)

Your implants and cry for attention on here only highlight what you and everyone else already suspect... you are insecure.

Likely your insecurity stems from always questioning if you really ever earned anything by merit. Most people probably hand you things because they like looking at you. But that's made you vapid, shallow, and unable to perform in any way that adds true value in the world.

Your relationships are superficial. Your romance life always has the shadow of doubt. Does he love you... or how you look? If you were disfigured, would anyone give you a second glance based on personality?

That nagging feeling will keep you looking for validation. It keeps you in the gym. It makes you post photos online looking for praise or positive attention. It keeps you going back for a nip here and tuck there. Before long you'll look like Donatella Versace with the personality of one of her handbags.

You'll shift from being the center of attention to being part of a gaggle of women who make rude comments about younger girls because you feel jealous and rude comments about men who no longer pay attention to you.

You'd be better served working on being a better person than hunting for attention on Reddit, but you'll likely die young and your grave will be about as shallow as your personality.

[–]Stilkonwheels 2860 ポイント2861 ポイント  (33子コメント)

Damn.... You made her delete the account 😂😂😂

[–]Araneatrox 312 ポイント313 ポイント  (15子コメント)

She deleted her Instagram too. The one she was shilling before the thread went nuclear.

That's a fucking flawless victory.

Edit - Instagram is back up. Either a temporary problem my end or a temp shutdown. Still a sight to behold

[–]no0b_64 2455 ポイント2456 ポイント  (15子コメント)

I was going to jerk off to this photo. But now I have to jerk off to this comment. Jesus.

[–]xtheory 283 ポイント284 ポイント  (8子コメント)

I'm confused and keep debating which one is going to get the facial first.

[–]Griffin880 57 ポイント58 ポイント  (2子コメント)

If this were a game of marry, fuck, kill I'd fuck the girl, marry the comment, and kill myself because I'd know I've peeked.

[–]Peach_Suppository 12.2k ポイント12.2k ポイント  (124子コメント)

[–]artemasad 5600 ポイント5601 ポイント  (88子コメント)

Jesus I'm from /r/all and enjoy RoastMe posts that pop up here and there. But I have never once read a roast this fucking savage before.

[–]Zombiehype[🍰] 2916 ポイント2917 ポイント  (49子コメント)

what about that girl so fat that the top roast was a heartfelt advice about how to get help?

[–]TankorSmash 66 ポイント67 ポイント  (2子コメント)

There was this fat girl on reddit getting hate somewhere, she was like 'you'll never say something to me that hasn't be already said', and then this dude was like 'What about "I love you"?'.

It was pretty savage.

[–]xLYNCHDEADMANX 1534 ポイント1535 ポイント  (17子コメント)

People who roast like this have peered into the abyss and have had it stare back.

[–]kenanjd 2030 ポイント2031 ポイント  (17子コメント)

I love this post. It's all fun and games until somebody makes it real with one of these.

[–]Andrew_Squaredhttp://redd.it/5rinoy 322 ポイント323 ポイント  (4子コメント)

These are what I come here for. The pedo jokes and usual stuff are low effort static. For me, this is the heart and soul of this sub.

[–]Lennysa 1244 ポイント1245 ポイント  (33子コメント)

If she wasn't before, she's definitely going to be insecure now.

[–]Hatstacker 1424 ポイント1425 ポイント  (10子コメント)

"Before long you'll look like Donatella Versace with the personality of one of her handbags."

10/10 well roasted! I'll add that to my personal stock of zingers, thank you.

[–]YetiPie 52 ポイント53 ポイント  (2子コメント)

"You'll likely die young and your grave will be about as shallow as your personality"

That's what really hit it home for me. Fucking nailed it.

[–]AlwaysFeral 537 ポイント538 ポイント  (7子コメント)

Checked out this post to see snarky one-liners, and instead got to read you demolishing an entire psyche.

[–]redheadedalex 197 ポイント198 ポイント  (5子コメント)

I feel like mine is somehow damaged too. Like I felt the aftershocks of destruction on my own ego. Goddamn

[–]MapsMapsEverywhere 423 ポイント424 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Oh fuck man.

Good thing the sidebar has /r/Depression and /r/SuicideWatch on it.

[–]Europus_b 92 ポイント93 ポイント  (0子コメント)

"Lemme just roast her in some charcoal... oh whoops that's the fusion reactor"

[–]Mango1447 452 ポイント453 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I've seen genocides that involved less immolation. Jesus Christ. You are a goddamn legend.

[–]The3rdRighthttp://redd.it/5mr4wh 544 ポイント545 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Vote this as one of the best roasts out there

[–]Useful_ID10TS 150 ポイント151 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Jesus Christ. That was so savage, I am pretty sure that it could be considered a war crime.
That said, this is one of the best roasts I have ever read.

[–]Mozeeon 200 ポイント201 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Shit. I didn't realize this was r/psychologicallycripplemeandmakemewannadie. Damn that's brutal... I'm saving this just to keep myself honest

[–]Nerdloaf 508 ポイント509 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Before long you'll look like Donatella Versace with the personality of one of her handbags.

You beautiful bastard.

[–]PaleoGuy1http://redd.it/5qf57h 88 ポイント89 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Now do one without your makeup on so your outside matches your ugly inside! It would be like suddenly viewing you through the eyes of Shallow Hal!

[–]GrimsterrOP 506 ポイント507 ポイント  (11子コメント)

I always hate it when a naturally beautiful girl asks to be roasted but luckily that ain't the case for you. You're so insecure you have to hide it all behind all that makeup and compensate your stupidity with your looks. You're probably a gold digger who uses guys for free meals and gonna end up being a single mom

[–]Trevino_Is_Herehttp://redd.it/5ryrn8 1063 ポイント1064 ポイント  (8子コメント)

If a push-up bra went up any more it would strangle you

[–]Whizzing-whizzerhttp://redd.it/6afe1i 231 ポイント232 ポイント  (4子コメント)

I rotated the phone and your forehead took up the whole screen.

[–]IDespiseFatties 78 ポイント79 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Lmao fucking wrecked. This is definitely r/museumofreddit material

[–]weaponized_virginity 76 ポイント77 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You should list your Photoshop experience on your job resume.

[–]murdill36http://redd.it/4w51mm 1061 ポイント1062 ポイント  (37子コメント)

wrong subreddit. here you go! /r/gonewild

[–]TrueDego 135 ポイント136 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You look like patient 0 of a new STD

[–]bobbyd2657 234 ポイント235 ポイント  (13子コメント)

So... What's the abortion count up to now?

[–]pewnanner 224 ポイント225 ポイント  (2子コメント)

She deleted her account! Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

Edit: hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

[–]asapnano 64 ポイント65 ポイント  (3子コメント)

I bet your Instagram account says you're a "Public Figure". What makes you think you are is the real joke

[–]Shauna_Malway-Tweep 165 ポイント166 ポイント  (2子コメント)

You have clearly underestimated Reddit users' ability to cut down any woman at any time for anything.

[–]PM_UR_USED_PANTIES 178 ポイント179 ポイント  (3子コメント)

It's takes some kind of special attention whore to create a new Reddit account simply for this one post.

In fact, it's the one thing that pulls the attention away from the fake tits........ a fake account !

[–]jsimco876 177 ポイント178 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Boob Job - Check

Makeup Youtube video - Check

Estrogen Injections to make you actually look like a woman - Still in progress.

[–]CatfishMeNot 91 ポイント92 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You are the definition of basic, your eyebrows look like they were drawn in a week ago with a Sharpie. You are the girl who sleeps with anyone once she's had a few drinks because that's the best validation in the world for people who hate themselves. Your morning routine leads to posting the same lame ass selfies on Instagram every day for a few compliments so you can feel better about yourself. You spend more time on social media than you do going out. After this thread shakes your entire fucking reality you'll send some nudes to a few male friends so you can feel validated again.

[–]Faptain_Hand_Solo 36 ポイント37 ポイント  (0子コメント)

If you suck your cheeks in any further, your face is going to implode... and we'd all be grateful.