hey guys i am very, very drunk. the summary of it all is that i got to hit someone in the face today!

four years ago i almost dated this dude who almost immediately changed his mind due to the fact that i was an obnoxious sjw. i dont blame him for that tbh. after some mutual friend intervention our differences were settled and we became friends even though i had a crush on him. we almost dated again a year later but he dumped me for a 14 year old girl (that's not legal here btw!) he continued to intermittently flirt/grope/finger/caress me in between various fights where he'd start calling me clingy and obnoxious. sure whatever we were still hanging out and drinking together and the like. we had some other disaster of a sexual relationship the next year and after he dumped me with a parting message of "oh don't kill yourself btw! see ya" i didn't talk to him for a few months... then i did again and he started literally crying and explained how he wanted me back in his life.. i was like.. oh man. maybe he actually cares about me as a person despite repeated behavior that indicates otherwise

meanwhile fast forward to like last week and i saw him write my name down in a tiny notebook. i was like. woah! wacky. i got curious and today i was drunk enough to go through his shit. i found that tiny notebook and the only thing he had written in it about me was how much he hated me and found me annoying...... so i hit him! it was very satisfying. then he followed me outside and i yelled at him and he was like "um but you are annoying sometimes" and i was like "yes, however, i have repeatedly vouched for your good intentions and fun friendly nature, and also you have been a dick to me, goodbye"

maybe i shouldnt have read his diary but as it turns out he has hated me this whole entire time and you know... i do not care about violating his privacy. he like fingered me in front of everyone i know at a party. also he had some sort of romantic relationship with a 14 year old girl. hes 25. what the fuck .