I don't actually really wanna be a monk and all that. I like sex. However, I still believe in Ye Olden Christian religion (albeit I have more of a universalist interpretation of it- which I think I can be backed by scripture). I am totally against premarital sex and I wanna get married so I can quit doing things like looking at porn. I understand some of you have different beliefs but I don't wanna argue about religion for the millionth time. You believe or you don't and if you don't you can still understand my perspective, calmly state your own beliefs if you like and address the question.

My question is this: if I have a not-legally-recognized marriage in someone's backyard purely for the sake of spiritual purposes (I don't want to committ fornication)- no marriage license, no government involvement AT ALL- can she still take my paper?

For you legal eagle folks, how do I do this without leaving myself open to getting basically robbed? Or is that not even possible?