Okay so ten years ago right, I was working at this store with this very cute busty redhead girl (my kryptonite, basically), she was a total sweetheart and I had developed a pretty big crush on her even though she was already taken, and then she and her boyfriend broke up. I thought I’d give her a month or so to get ready to move on before I made it clear I was interested in her, but when I did I found out that I was too late, that another guy we worked with had beaten me to the punch. So now they both knew that I was into her - slightly awkward, right? And the three of us plus the store manager were literally the store’s whole management team, it was impossible for us to avoid each other.
That’s actually the incident that led me to develop my aggressive date-multiple-people-at-once strategy and apply my marketing training to finding prospective dates - I really needed to get a girlfriend to neutralize the weird situation I was in at work, if I was dating somebody else the tension would be gone. And so I did find someone pretty quickly (not coincidentally another very cute busty redhead girl) and the situation was resolved and a while later I left to go work on my PhD on the other side of the country and I never saw those two again. I heard they eventually got married though. Oh man, I thought, another girl I had totally lusted after for like a year and a half that I’d never be able to get another chance with. Kind of a shame we never got to have, like, a one-night stand at least, like I never even saw her naked. That would have really been cathartic, you know? Oh well.
Fast forward to a couple of hours ago - I get a text from the guy, he says he saw my picture on a certain kinky part of the Internet and he’s acting a little weird and he says he’s got a surprise for me, so I’m like, oh shit, he’s going to try to blackmail me or something, is he going to ask for money, what is going on. No - he remembered that I totally had a thing for his wife, and apparently they’re into swinging now, and he starts sending me very lewd pictures of her all tied up and blindfolded and such, and invites me to come visit them and fuck her the next time I’m back in the area.
What the fuck even is my life