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The downside to meeting online (self.adultery)

Winterwhite03 が 投稿

I've met several nice, interesting, conversational, bright men online and carried on conversations ranging from a few days to a few weeks. Then they send over a photo and I think "no way" and that's pretty much that. Is it possible to find someone who ticks 9 of 10 boxes or should I get used to settling if I want to continue with this lifestyle?

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[–]louis_g_wu 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (3子コメント)

If looks are important to you then you should be swapping pictures much sooner.

[–]wifeswaptex 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Completely agree. Let's be honest, "looks" are critically important to almost every man, and many women.

Best to exchange pics very early, less wasting of everyone's time.

Unless you explicitly are just looking for an online friend, in which case, maybe best to never exchange pics, so you can focus on their character.

[–]Readandlearn99 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Definitely if you are looking for just an online friend, skip the photos. Better not to know.

[–]burnthisaccount2016 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

THIS. Just be upfront and get the pic swap thing done sooner.

[–]MidwestTransplant80 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Be clear about what you want in your profile.. physical description. Just be honest.

[–]dfwbbwgallooking 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I've done this but it didn't really matter. Each guy was convinced he would change my mind if I just have him a chance.

[–]Winterwhite03[S] 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This. Or they don't read the ad at all.

[–]BreakingBadHusband 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Of course it's possible. I've said it before but I'll repeat it, you're risking a lot by cheating so why do it with someone that doesn't meet all your expectations. Now, be prepared, if your list is long, for it to take a while to meet Mr. Perfect. After all this is like dating but with a much smaller pool of potentials.

[–]livingmahlife 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (5子コメント)

Get yourself on AM and only start conversations with men who have photos that you like. Saves valuable time (yours and theirs).

[–]Winterwhite03[S] 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Most of the men don't have photos up or it's just their torso. I've found AM to be disappointing.

[–]throwawayny91234 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Give tinder or Bumble a shot . Maybe okc?

[–]the-fight-picker 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (2子コメント)

You have no clue how disappointing it really is.

[–]Winterwhite03[S] 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Meaning?

[–]the-fight-picker -3 ポイント-2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Meaning you will find a confident, gorgeous guy who's amazing in bed, just like you picture him. He will be gorgeous - find him. Trust me, he's there.

Oh, and the best part, is that HE will come to YOU. You don't have to do anything other than wait for him.

Isn't that great?

[–]anadultererhasnoname 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

So here's the thing. I almost always go to a F2F even after pic exchange even if I'm not 100% convinced. Here's why. The first time I got a pic from a guy on AM, I thought "no way, not my type" but I felt bad and didn't want to hurt his feelings. So, I went for drinks anyways. He wasn't necessarily cuter in person, but there was something about him. Some sort of quality that made him attractive to me. He ended up being my current AP1. We've been seeing each other for 6 months or so now.

This almost exact situation has happened with 2 other men. I get the picture, think nope and then end up finding them attractive at the meeting. I turned one guy down for months and eventually met with him and he was really cute!! We saw each other for about 2 months. And the other, his picture was so awful I almost backed out of the meeting. But I didn't and holy shit, he was super hot! I have no idea how or why that picture that he sent me happened. It was fucking terrible. He's my AP2 now and seriously, he's incredibly attractive.

So my point is, if the conversation is good you might just get bad pictures. Guys especially seem to have serious problems taking a decent picture. I have met some people where we just didn't click, so that happens too, but I try to give most people a shot unless there's something that I 100% can't live with about them.

[–]thisdoublelife 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I wanted to say something similar. I don't really trust pictures. After seeing my AP's picture I was so disappointed. I decided to go through with the meeting anyway. I was just so-so about him at that point but he convinced me to kiss him and that was it for me. Best sex of my life.

[–]Kickingitpersay 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

It depends. You likely won't out-kick your coverage. But if you're patient and discerning, as a woman, you should be able to find an equally attractive AP.

[–]bodyhasaheart 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

My AP is not a great looking guy. MY GOD is he amazing in bed though. Funny thing though, I would prefer someone more... interesting and conversational. Will I never satisfied? Lol ;-)

[–]MMinTN 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

My pictures suck!! And yet IRL I seem to do very well... maybe us guys just don't know how to take pics, i don't know....

[–]dfwbbwgallooking 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is a true statement.

[–]LAfun1 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Start with a picture right away. Duhhhh!!!

Here's the thing: no pic means they are unattractive or likely too timid to actually meet.

[–]TotesMessenger 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm a bot, bleep, bloop. Someone has linked to this thread from another place on reddit:

If you follow any of the above links, please respect the rules of reddit and don't vote in the other threads. (Info / Contact)

[–]the-fight-picker -3 ポイント-2 ポイント  (3子コメント)

No sister - live your dreams!!! Demand that all the boxes be checked! Go for only the most attractive, successful and amazing man possible! You deserve it.

[–]Winterwhite03[S] 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Methinks you're being sarcastic. But considering your name, I'll leave it at that. Good day to you.

[–]the-fight-picker -3 ポイント-2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

No, no, no! You're entitled to only the very best man possible. Go for that. You'll find exactly what you deserve.