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submitted by Bigman134
I, fellow redpillers, am what I like to call a redpill veteran. Back from the days of Shark on Solvemygirlproblems.com. I don't know why I'm prefacing with this, I guess to show that I'm not a noob and have read ALOT of redpill material.
Yes, AWALT. Do not let ANYONE tell you otherwise.
PMS exists for one reason. It's because the woman is NOT fertile at this time. She cannot have babies. From an evolutionary perspective (and yes, everything we do stems from biology and evolution), women are "useless" at this moment of time. NOT from a social standpoint, simply from an evolutionary, reproductive standpoint. They are useless. They are menstruating, they are bleeding, they are not fertile. They are USELESS. So, what does the typical woman do? She lashes out at you. She starts fights for no reason. The beta male does not put 2 and 2 together, and sees this happen, and goes crazy. He tries to "solve" her issues, he tries to reason with her, tries to fix her problems, but little does he know that these problems are not solvable. Why? Because AWALT. ALL women do this because they cannot help it. They cannot control it. Their minds are doing this, not them. They are trying to tell you to GET AWAY from them. The hamster is literally saying, "I'm not fertile right now! I'm not fuckable! Go away from me!" It manifests this by being a bitch, starting fights, arguing for no reason, and making absolutely no sense.
Then, you come across menopause. Why do divorce rates skyrocket for men and women in their 50's? Why do some women let their men fool around with other women when they hit 50? Because now, they are permanently of no use. They cannot reproduce, so from an evolutionary/biology perspective, they are done. They serve no purpose now. Evolution only cares about survival. Nothing else. Survival of the species. It dictates everything that we do.
That being said, me dropping that, I am humble enough to follow with a sort of question or comment, something that I DEEPLY struggle with. What do you do, when you have a wife, a loving, loving, caring wife who respects you, you guys are in your late 20's, but she pulls the bitch factor out at you? If this was another plate, you dissapear and let her know she cannot play those games with you. Disinterest will always draw her back.
What do you do when she's your WIFE? And you live together? And she starts fights, says hurtful, stupid shit that she would never ever say otherwise? Always followed up a few days later with "I'm so so so sorry, you know, I wasn't thinking straight, it was my time of the month! hehehehehehe!!!!!"
I just struggle with it. You can't just next your wife. Or maybe you can? Anyone have any experience with this?
Then again, the more experienced RedPillers will just tell me that this is why you should just never get married. In 2017, the way feminism is in full force and the way the world works now, you are probably right. But, I can't just do that right now.
Any thoughts?
all 25 comments
[–]whatsthisgarg 7 points8 points9 points  (3 children)
I hope you have enough other material in the beginning so this isn't deleted as an s/b in askTRP, so:
If this was another plate, you dissapear and let her know she cannot play those games with you. Disinterest will always draw her back. What do you do when she's your WIFE?
I do believe your title includes the phrase "AWALT" and the answer to your question is right there. It doesn't matter who the woman is, you treat them all pretty much the same.
Don't try to talk about it, because LOL. That shit will only make it worse. You just give her a dirty look and do not reward her with your presence. Pretty simple, though perhaps not always easy to do in the moment.
Did you miss Rollo's "subconsciously break up with your wife" post?
Why don't women like to be liked? Fucking maddening.
[–]Bigman134[S] 4 points5 points6 points  (2 children)
I just googled it to try and find that post by Rollo and couldn't find it. Can you link me?
Thanks
[–]B4theDarkTimes 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
The doubt is there. You may be married for 30 years, but there will always be that one time when you two broke up, or she fucked that other guy, and everything you think you’ve built with her over the years will always be compromised by that doubt of her desire.
You will never escape her impression that you were so optionless you had to beg her to rekindle her intimacy with you.
Jesus. Great article, but a brutal read.
[–]1kez88 7 points8 points9 points  (1 child)
You preface everything with saying you're not a noob and you've read a bunch of material, but if you've read a bunch of material then you'd know it doesn't matter if she's your wife or not you should act how you would act with any woman. Walk away, go to the gym, go do things you have to do, tell her she's being irrational and a bitch and walk away or tell her to talk to you later when she's less emotional.
[–]Poofysmoof 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Agreed, I came here for some of these exact reasons. You may be letting some of your beta traits reemerge, if your able to hold frame it should adjust itself. Some of the things here are unnatural for myself but just trust in TRP. Lastly you said you can't walk away, that's actually very important you must always be ready to walk away. A independent man is a strong man, good luck.
[–]aftenbladet 5 points6 points7 points  (0 children)
There is only one tactic that Ive found useful in these situations when a women tries to provoke a reaction from you, intentional or not.
Ignore her threats or hurtful comments by not commenting on it. A simple "Okaaay.." and removing yourself from that situation will make her reflect and start seeing her actions as irrational. Show her that you dont need her approval or affection.
I often leave the house or room and do something fun instead. Nothing pisses her off more than hearing me laughing and enjoying myself without her when she is in a bad mood.
[–]cazbot 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
You've already got your own answer man.
Disinterest will always draw her back.
When she's acting like a bitch, go out with the boys, get a hobby, make friends at the bar, just leave and live a little. Look at her PMS as your time to get out and enjoy the fact that you have the freedom to do whatever the fuck makes you happy.
[–]Paladin2903 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
Women have also used their period as an excuse to go on a 7 day bitch fit, and lash out at everyone because "I'm on my period," and then that shuts down any sort of criticism of her behavior, and beta Bob just goes "Aw shucks...well she's on her period."
I've seen multiple women admit this, first hand, multiple times. It's just manipulation. I mean, is there some pain associated with her period? I'm sure there is. However, it's nowhere NEAR the level they make it out to be, and if it is, there are plenty of painkilling prescriptions to deal with it.
At the end of the day, it's just an excuse to be a cunt. A "cunt pass," if you will.
[–]Dayman_ah-ah-ah 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
You realize women can still get pregnant when they're on their period right?
[–]Battle-Scars 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
Post to married redpill for advice.
[–]quickeddie 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
I can't stand this PMS bullshit from women where she thinks she can blame bad behavior on the hormonal cocktail overtaking her brain. For a man, every day of his life from the time he hits puberty he needs to civilize his behavior despite raging testosterone giving him intense aggressive and sexual urges, constantly. This PMS shit is really no excuse.
[–]0kool74 1 point2 points3 points  (0 children)
You can't just next your wife
Men do it every day. Sounds like for all that reading you said you've done, it hasn't stopped you from staying under your harpy's thumb.
[–]Endorsed Contributorstonepimpletilists 2 points3 points4 points  (0 children)
I am redpill veteran
How do I pass a shit test?
You're bullshitting yourself. This has nothing to do with femenism, your post preface has nothing to do with your question, and you're so far in your wifes frame, that I'm surprised she fucks you on the regular.
Questions to askTRP.
As for the others reading this. Amused Mastery, Agree and Amplify, and fogging. Hold frame, and don't let a wee little girl make you sweat.
This is novice level LTR stuff, good luck
[–]aanarchist 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
this is why you find a woman who is wise enough to not put marriage on the table in the first place, because she understands that a truly high value man who is intelligent and has self respect will not allow a single woman to have so much power over his life and future. there is nothing you can't do with a live in partner that you can with a wife/husband. if you explain that to her and she is incapable of acknowledging this as truth then you next her because her reasons for demanding marriage is that she understands deep down that any sane man would leave her eventually. a truly good woman who is worth committing to for the long term, she operates on the understanding that either of you could decide to leave at any moment for any reason, and so chooses to put her best foot forward every day instead of looking for a slave collar around her mates neck so that she can be lazy and useless and have her life financed by someone elses hard work.
regardless, the best thing you can do is call her out on her behavior and not let her bait you into stupid little arguments about nothing. frankly it would be better off for you to talk to her about how you're going to start seeing other women on the side. she will not respect a man who settles for her, she doesn't have the youth or beauty, nor is her attitude that of a good wife. you know you're worth more and deserve better, and so does she. at the end of the day she just wants to feel safe, and you have to treat her the way she deserves to be treated, no more than that. it'll teach her real quick to fix her attitude.
[–]dandar4600 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
What do you do when she's your WIFE? And you live together? And she starts fights, says hurtful, stupid shit that she would never ever say otherwise?
Leave the room, if she follows trying to stir shit up then you leave the house. Go to the gym, go see your friends, go out to a coffee shop and read... or flirt, whatever tickles your fancy. Anything really. If she behaves you reward that with your time and attention, if she doesn't you remove it.
[–]whythecynic 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
But, I can't just do that right now.
You can, but you don't want to. Do you not want to because you've looked at the consequences and objectively judged them to be worse? Or are you afraid of taking that step? Don't confuse the two. I get it, it's near impossible. But it's far easier to run away with an excuse.
I'll take your words at face value, and think about salvaging the relationship.
And she starts fights, says hurtful, stupid shit that she would never ever say otherwise?
If you were so easily hurt, you have already lost. You are completely her bitch, she knows it, and she uses it to push your buttons. She may be a bitch, but the bigger problem is that you are her bitch. You have a gaping vulnerability, she is simply being an average human by exploiting it, and you are doing nothing to protect yourself.
That is the key thing to remember: she is just being an average human by exploiting your weakness. Not an evil person. Remember that most people don't mean (or even know) what they say. They just say it because it works- it gets a rise out of someone else, it confuses them, it stops them from thinking rationally- it works. Children are like that with words- they're cruel, not malevolent. They simply do not understand meaning past pleasure and pain. It takes a morally exceptional person to not hurt someone when they know there are no consequences for it.
Let the insults slide off you and doing something else in the meantime, like a new hobby or going out with your (likely neglected) male friends. Resist the urge to make snappy comebacks or one-liners. Simply remain outwardly still, like a rock. This argumentative relationship is likely a bad habit that developed over years, so you'll find it difficult at first. But keep at it, constantly remind yourself, and meditate at night so you understand the feeling of being the master of yourself.
With luck (it really is pure luck at this point), your relationship will get better as she starts to put in more effort to match your refusal to accept things as they are. More likely, you have lost her respect forever, and regardless of her natural disposition anyway, this goes on for the rest of your life. Then you have to make the real decision.
[–]FloridaNSUplz 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Bro you read shark as well? Shark was amazing, his post inspired me. I still have a lot of his posts saved, they're invaluable advice.
[–]Roughknot 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Call her out, keep busy.
Sometimes I lose track of her cycle and without fail I always lose my attraction for her and my eye starts wandering and I get my flirty with other girls.
Wife doesn't have to be there, she feels the change in me and gets the dread. She gets nice real quick.
[–]slothcook -3 points-2 points-1 points  (0 children)
Woman here. This is entertaining for me to see how fucking dumb you all are. Please, never procreate-you are all fucking idiots.
Ps: I'm saying these hurtful things and I'm not even menstruating!! What a concept. Maybe you're just an asshole and that why your wife/girlfriend is mean to you.
[–]Endorsed ContributorMattyAnon -2 points-1 points0 points  (2 children)
Their minds are doing this, not them.
I refuse to differentiate between her mind, her "self", her body, her emotions, her hormones.
It's all just a girl who does stuff, and I don't exonerate any of her actions on the basis of "This just isn't me, but I can't help it because...". Normally everyone her, because they define "her real self" as different from "this other part of her that makes her do stuff" but that's not really her.
It is ALL her. She is the totality of the stuff that she does, and I don't let her off the hook by saying "society did this to her" or "she can't help it because of X". She knows what she does, and it's her choice at every stage.
Women are not naive, they know exactly what they're doing. They just don't care.
They are trying to tell you to GET AWAY from them. The hamster is literally saying, "I'm not fertile right now! I'm not fuckable! Go away from me!"
There is no biological reason for a woman to alienate a man. Just because she can't get pregnant this week doesn't mean his loyalty is worthless. In fact it would make sound biological sense to fuck betas when she is infertile (all the loyalty, none of his non-Chad genes). And this is what they do, at least when they're not in screaming banshee mode.
. Why do divorce rates skyrocket for men and women in their 50's?
Err... because women are unattractive after their 40's? Because the kids have grown up so they no longer stay together "for the children"? There are other explanations besides "no longer fertile".
What do you do, when you have a wife, a loving, loving, caring wife who respects you, you guys are in your late 20's, but she pulls the bitch factor out at you?
This is subdividing the woman again and exonerating her behaviour. If she behaves like a bitch, she's a bitch. If she's a bitch 20% of the time, she's 20% bitch.
What do you do when she's your WIFE? And you live together? And she starts fights, says hurtful, stupid shit that she would never ever say otherwise?
What does "otherwise" mean? You mean if she wasn't being a bitch to you some of the time?
She says stupid hurtful shit to hurt you ... she knows you'll forgive her, she doesn't care.
In that moment she wants to lash out and hurt you. And that's fine, she can shout it at my back for the short amount of time I'm within earshot. And then she can go fuck herself for all I care.
This is what male legal commitment does to women: allows them to behave like shit and get away with it. If you were willing to walk, this shit wouldn't happen. Or if it did, it wouldn't happen twice.
Women know where they stand. Women test for where they stand. YOU have allowed this to happen.
I just struggle with it. You can't just next your wife. Or maybe you can? Anyone have any experience with this?
If you're as red pill as you claim you will know that marriage is a fundamentally dumb fucking idea for men.
If you can't next your wife, she will know that she can fuck you over, and she will do so. Women fundamentally do not care for men. You need to understand this on a deep level. You need to stop saying to yourself this lie that "she's a good person, she just does these shitty things for XXX reason". No, she does these shitty things because she's a normal woman who behaves in a normal woman way. There is nothing good or nice or decent or loving or caring in there beyond self interest.
In 2017, the way feminism is in full force and the way the world works now, you are probably right. But, I can't just do that right now.
You have forced yourself into a scarcity mindset, a "make it work" mindset, which your wife is exploiting. This is totally normal of course, happens every time.
If you don't have kids, get a divorce. It's that simple.
[–]cashmoney_x -1 points0 points1 point  (1 child)
"it's her choice at every stage."
Wrong. Current neuroscience would be an interesting and illuminating read for you. Basically, we have no free will.
[–]Endorsed ContributorMattyAnon 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Basically, we have no free will
The "we are all deterministic and therefore blameless" rationale.
I agree with the deterministic part of this. But to say "therefore there is no choice and therefore no blame" is to say "it's fine for everyone to do what they want", and I disagree.
When you say "we do not hold you responsible", people make different (deterministic) choices.
By holding people responsible, they behave better. By imprisoning those who behave badly, the rest of society improves. Free will is not a necessary construct.
To remove the word choice from my statement: "Women know what they are doing and still act the way they do, they are not unknowing innocents".
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