"I feel ..." is a secret decoder ring.

Blunter-S-Thompson · 1日前

potentially solve a critical thinking problem for her. This is extremely attractive to a woman.

Go back to 101 stuff if you are still under the belief women want you to solve their problems....

sexyshoulderdevil · 1日前

Ah, your Red Pill Ninja is sneaking up on your ass and delivering comfort tests...not really shit tests. When your Ninja says, "I feel like..." and she's expressing her emotions, she wants you to listen, fog and sometimes offer real advice. Or just give her a kiss on the forehead and a hug once she's done.

When she says "YOU do this..." and it's some random silly bullshit...that's a shit test. Then you lock and load some agree and amplify if you know how.

Since you asked (I know you didn't), I consider myself a Red Pill Penis Robot.

Oh and you're wife isn't special. She's doing the same exact shit all secretly trained Ninja wives do. You're not special either. My robot penis is not special. Get this through your head. Especially the part about visualizing my robot penis. ROBOT PENIS.

RBuddDwyer · 1日前

Yeah, "I feel..." is a common verbal filler for most all women. It's a reflection of the fact that they are primarily emotional thinkers, although it's seeing more use recently as a stand in for, "I think..." or, "I believe..." by men as well.

That is usually not how a woman starts a shit test. It actually is one of the few times when you can take a woman's words at face value. She very likely is feeling whatever it is she says she is feeling, but will very likely be feeling some other random unrelated emotion soon after. These are not shit tests. Or rather the fact that she says "I feel..." is not a shit test in and of itself. That's not what makes a shit test a shit test.

It is a overt verbal cue that she is about to explain to me one of her needs, and that I am not meeting it (or it is not being met otherwise and she would like me to meet it).

You got this part mostly right. She is explaining to you how she feels because she (usually subconsciously) wants you to make her feel something else, either because it is a bad emotion she is feeling, or because she is bored and wants to mix it up a bit and feel something different. So this becomes a perfect opportunity for you to express your dominion over her and lead her to a different emotional state.

One other thing is that a woman will almost never give you an overt verbal cue like that for anything, let alone the primary weapon in her arsenal. Women are much more devious than that.

have been successfully able to turn around these tests by asking her to explain why she FEELS this way and listen to her explanation and getting a much deeper and more fundamental understanding of the complaint.

So, you are her emotional tampon. Good move, bro...

If you are ever explaining anything and you use the word "feels" you know you found something that keys into your resistance to stoicism and a true IDGAF attitude. Use it to search yourself for potential character flaws or other areas for personal growth.

Yeah, I don't think you know how Stoicism works. Men feel emotions all the time. Stoicism does not prevent that. Stoicism makes it so that you are not governed by them like women are.

About the only thing that I agree with you on is that a man should rarely, if ever, start a sentence with the phrase, "I feel..." Men think and men do. How one feels about something is hardly, if ever, relevant.

screechhater · 23時間前

"I have been successfully able to turn around these tests by asking her to explain why she FEELS this way and listen to her explanation and getting a much deeper and more fundamental understanding of the complaint. This is useful because it allows you to: brace for impact. Decide weather to STFU or move to a more advances response. touches her FEELS by allowing her to voice her complaints. This is nothing less than emotional masturbation. potentially solve a critical thinking problem for her. This is extremely attractive to a woman."

When a woman states, I feel- it's direct insight to an uncomfortable feeling of hers, a premonition of sorts, that there is something wrong and therefore instead of "mindfucking it to death" or STFU, you should listen, validate the statement and then give her a hug or kiss, or both. Then work on whatever the problem is and do it. AKA, Owning Your Shit. This is not truly shit or comfort test, but a verbalization of feelings

2ndal · 1日前

My wife says "I feel..." a lot. Depending on her tone, I handle it either by A&A if it feels like a budding shit test (my favorite tactic is to grab her arm, feel, and squeeze, saying yeah you DO feel like...) or by negative inquiry if it feels more like a comfort test, making sure not to take ownership of her feelings or solve her problems, but lead her down the path of working through her feelings out loud which invariably gets her out of her funk in a more rational way without it turning into a full blown shit test.

anythinginc · 1日前

I feel...

Hmm. I would say that women (and men), start using "I feel..." more after reading a few marriage problem sites and "How to Communicate Effectively in your Marriage" columns. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? It is either a woman wanting to be more versed in subtle domination/control/gaslighting....or someone who is really trying to make a good-faith effort towards good interpersonal communication. "I feel" is at the top of every list. Not exactly common otherwise in everyday vernacular.

My divorce was mutual, fast, and easy, but I am in a fault state; she had to say something, not too bad, but nothing the judge would balk at. We thought for a long time, but as of the morning of D-day, she didn't have anything. In the judges office, when he asked her, this is what she said:

He never validated my feelings. Whenever I would say "I feel" something, he tries to logic it away, or fix it, or pretend it doesn't matter and shouldn't be bothering me...and by doing that he is disregarding my feelings, and I can't live with someone who does that, it is mean and makes me feel worthless

Judge said okay, signed the papers, last time we saw or spoke to each other. Now, that may be some bullshit..or it may be the realest shit that has ever been said about me, doesn't matter, I'm not that person anymore.

Anyway, the point I (and every other poster) want to make is be careful about treating this as standard shit-test stuff to shut down.

Budd has a good take:

She is explaining to you how she feels because she (usually subconsciously) wants you to make her feel something else

But the catch-22, is I was worthless, lots of us are/were worthless, these "I feels" are often about OUR shortcomings...it is difficult to make her "feel something else" when what she is feeling is something negative about YOU, and she's looking AT YOU, and YOU are trying to (yet again?) pull some bullshit to get the heat off YOU. "Feeling something else" would involve YOU being either gone, or better. Hop. Skip. Jump. Divorce.

Now, if you two are just having a normal conversation and "I feel" comes out then whatever, it is a part of speech.

But when it is about complaints, you, her, household, existential shit...the best bet is to NOT be that guy!

Don't be worthless, don't be a beta bitch, don't be an emotional tampon, don't be her child, don't be responsible for her feelings...but right now, when we start MRP...SO many of us are. We ARE that guy. We have to become attractive, become valuable, own our shit, build a frame, get her inside, and then, hopefully, we won't be that guy anymore. "I feel" will just be a code word for "come hold me and kiss me."

In conclusion, instead of discussing how to handle "I feel," the best case scenario is to just not be the guy she says it to. What to do in the mean time? Whatever, handle it, get out of the situation as gracefully as you can and go own shit and add value and become more attractive. Hope it is not a sign she's been reading marriage advice sites and you have time to improve.

The last year of my marriage, I got hit with "I feel" three times a week. I can't remember a specific time with NewGirl except her expressing positive emotions about me/her/us, often in bed, often with cum dripping out of her. Because I own my shit, I'm attractive, I'm not unattractive, all her feels are either good feels, or softballs she lobbing at me to knock out of the park with a kiss and a hug. I hope someday you get to be that guy, it's pretty nice.

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