Awareness. And I suppose knowing that there is more to learn by listening and engaging. The problem a lot of frustrated people of color and women and lgbtqalmnopqrs folks keep being confronted with is the rigidity of people who they are genuinely trying to engage when communicating their experiences. There's this idea that these people should just "stop complaining" and stop being "special snowflakes" wanting to be treated like they're special, when in reality, if the other side would just LISTEN, they just want to be treated EQUALLY. And they can't help but notice when they are not. And it seems monotonous or incessant when they talk about what they experience, because they keep being singled out. Meanwhile, there is a sizable contingent of "traditional Americans" who feel that in actuality it is they themselves who are really oppressed. And of oppression, most people's minds flick to horrendous film reels of blacks being sprayed with hoses and having dogs sicked on them, the most extreme brutality inflicted upon others, and thus because this seemingly doesn't happen anymore, it doesn't exist. Or because they see blacks and women and other members of marginalized groups see some prosperity, things must be pretty good for the majority of them. Now, the heaviest ask of all is this: Try not to internalize the frustration of people when they speak of discrimination and other things they experience, there's a habit of interpreting 'white people' in totality, when some people talk about 'white people' and their ways. It's complicated, and a lot of times even a seemingly understanding white person will trip over themselves verbally and find themselves in hot water or, as often is the case, some of these people will bill themselves as tolerant and progressive, but underneath it still embody a lot of the old prejudice and bias, they just mask it well. Just look at places where you'll find a lot of blue left leaning folks, yet the blackest thing you'll find in those communities is the coffee they drink all day. And they may find themselves feeling uneasy if a few dark faces manage to afford living next to them. There's 'white people' and then there's 'white's only' white people. All that is required of you is to try not to be one of the latter. And you may become the stand in for your people in arguments sometimes, it happens. Some people do the whole social justice thing wrong, where it turns into the 'oppression marathon' where we all compete for the gold and one atrocity outranks another. Nope. It's all wrong, and we can talk about and acknowledge it all. The more aware we are of it, the more we can question whether we're adding to it or not.