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"Get on all fours" - completely backfired (self.askMRP)

jimbosmith21 が 投稿

So our sex life has been getting properly back on track recently, mainly due to tips I've picked up here and in the sidebar.

Last night I escalated and she was really keen. We started having sex and in my red pill mentality I said dominantly "get on all fours" which she complied to & we started fucking doggy style. But I could tell that a switch had flipped and she had lost almost all enthusiasm. I flipped her back over after a couple minutes and finished the job missionary. She half-heartedly came just before I did.

Afterwards she was sulky so I asked what's up and she said she felt degraded when I told her to get on all fours. I thought girls were supposed to love this...? She was loving it up to this point.

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[–]weakandsensitive 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (5子コメント)

Before TBP jumps all over this (which I'm sure they will since this is probably as juicy as they come),

and here we have the autist merper who doesn't understand calibration.

Chalk it up as a failure and try again next time. Shit happens.

If you want MRP to solve this problem, better send your wife in since we aren't mind readers.

[–]bogeyd6Mod / Red Pill Militia 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Hahaha this perfectly reminded me of work place interactions. When your supervisor tells you to do something you say "Right on it boss" but when the janitor tells you to do something "Who the fuck is that guy?"

[–]MuhTriggersGuise 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Before TBP jumps all over this

Who gives a shit what they think.

[–]WhiteTrashKillerFilet Mignon of Redpill -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Great job on a shit response!

Why don't you tell him the positives instead. She complied with his leadership, he enjoyed himself, she still came!

Her emotions after the fact are not his to navigate. I would be more worried that he overstepped his frame and spent more SMV than he has if she outright said no! This is all about steps, 6 months from now she should be asking you to turn her over!

Soldier on!

[–]stonepimpletilistsMod / Red Beret 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

lol, you really think he's gonna given an attaboy?

You must be new here.

[–]drty_pr 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

he enjoyed himself, she still came!

Negative. A half harted orgasm right before you finish is most definitely a fake. At least she cared enough to fake it though. Shows she likes him.

[–]ArchwingerRed Beret 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That just means you have more work to do.

You're coming along well. Your wife is fucking you on the regular. She's letting you lead the sexual encounters and complying with your requests. She's even having orgasms.

But after the fact, she still feels dirty and used for fucking you. She remembers who you were, she sees the remaining flaws in who you are currently, and after the heat of the moment dies down and the sex is over, she feels disgusted for letting you, a loser, make her into your little slut.

When you hit the point where random women are finding excuses to touch you, even in front of your wife, and her subconscious realizes that a lot of women wouldn't mind being your little slut, she may come around.

[–]rp_findingmyway 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Interesting. Probably went too hard with the Rambo. Ironically, during sexy times with my wife last night, I also started out missionary and then wanted her to flip over. I didn't tell her to "get on all 4's" but rather just said "turn over and show me your gorgeous ass". She happily complied.

My guess is that your wife wants the assertiveness/dominance from you but without feeling like she's being ordered around by a drill sergeant.

[–]RBuddDwyerRed Beret 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

My guess is that your wife wants the assertiveness/dominance from you but without feeling like she's being ordered around by a drill sergeant.

Your reply makes me think along the lines of the idea of LMR from the PUA set. I've been going over the Book of YaReally recently, and had a few insights from his posts talking about LMR. I have not digested it enough to put it up there, but it's interesting.

[–]innominating 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (2子コメント)

So, I have taken sex with wife from always missionary and always vanilla, to very rough, hair pulling, choking, face fucking, etc. When I started MRP, my wife would literally tell me to say please if I made a request in bed. Talk about killing the mood. I started by teasing her and calling her the "politeness princess" and worked up over time to more dominant sex. There has been plenty of sulking along the way as my wife has dealt wife feeling objectified after she had massive organisms, I assume. Her hind brain loves it, then her forebrain comes back online and she remembers the "you go girl" attitude and is conflicted.

I have a rule that if my wife doesn't make mouth sounds, neither do I. If she is sulking, I assume she is dealing with some shit I have no control over. In this case, your wife was sulking because of some shit you have no control over: how she felt.

Next time show your wife how appreciative you are of her submission. Cuddle her and tell her how much you liked the sex and how much you love that she is yours and whatever else you can think up (make up) at the time.

Also, there is good advice in other comments about how to buffer your commands a little. "Put you sexy ass in the air for me," etc. Reward the submission. Compliment her as you dominate.

[–]mrpthrowa 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

"you go girl"

fucking hell i know what you mean.

[–]Deraileur 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

BDSM people have "aftercare". Very similar to your second last paragraph. Women are emotional tempests, give a little comfort that it's ok to be a slut.

[–]The_Litz 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Afterwards she was sulky so I asked what's up

That there. Discussing feelz. You probably knew why even before you asked.

You cannot go from Woody Allen to Jason Statham overnight. You have to ramp it up over time and actually be aware of how much you can push your previous limits.

Feeling degraded is a common complaint women have concerning doggy style, untill you become worth it and she then seeks it.

[–]SampsonBrass 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Did you specify the breed you wanted? Feelings buddy feelings. You've got to make her feel like she wants to be your bitch. Think about how you're going to do that next time.

[–]nonnimooseWoman, something something dark side 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

She half-heartedly came just before I did.

Translation: she faked that orgasm so that you would finish up.

Is it possible that she was almost there and then the change in positions caused her to "lose" that orgasm. For me, if I'm just about to come, whatever is going on right then needs to keep going on. It's possible that the switch in positions killed the physiological momentum needed to get over the edge and then after the fact she attributed it to your words.

[–]InChargeMan 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

She sounds stressful...

[–]ReddJive 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

THere's more going on that you aren't telling us or admitting to.

its either she isn't all that attracted to you and just wanted dick

or

she's right on that edge. some women get conflicted about being a slut for their man...or even the right man. Which is why the oak and comfort are critical things to pass. They want to know you want more from them then just being a good slut.

Reevaluate the whole day. See if you failed something along the way.

[–]470_2_700_nm -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (0子コメント)

If you think she is conflicted about being your slut you can communicate in no uncertain terms, that you need her to be both your wife and your slut / whore. And follow it up with how you won't tell anyone.

[–]RBuddDwyerRed Beret 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

There is more to it than just "flip your ass over". If you are getting pussy on the regular, start looking into Sex God Method, and take it slow from there.

[–]midlifedick 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This stuff has to be timed right, too. Do you know where she is in her cycle?

Timing and congruence. Was this out of the blue? Are you handling all your stuff outside the bedroom?

Early on I thought I would try spanking the wife's ass. It was a clumsy move, she was on top, I was not in control of the situation in or out of the bedroom. She said" don't do that". I took it as just another shit test and did it again. She got up and got in the shower. Oh well.

I'm in a different spot now, got most things on point including the muscles and attitude. Now she likes to wrestle. Literally wrestle. I guess she wants to feel the strength. Also, she moans when I spank her now. I use it sparingly and only when she is receptive of going a little rougher. I guage with how she responds to a firm wrist grab or fistfull of hair at the base of her head.

Work up to it slow, and make sure it's congruent with the whole package.

[–]shinola_ 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'd recommend not referring to doggy style or "get on all fours," especially if you've been a beta bitch for a long time.

Say "I want you from the back." It's less off putting if she's still kind of turned off by you on any level. As you progress and she feels sexy around you, tell her you want to see her ass. Just keep from letting her mind go to being fucked like a dog. You're not attractive enough for that yet.

[–]stonepimpletilistsMod / Red Beret 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

The sex happened, she psyched herself out of it.

I notice you fucked up a comfort test after the fact. Chicks love being degrade by high quality men, they don't like having the reputation of a whore though.

Once she feels comfortable, and good about being degraded, she'll be up for it more. Have to lead brother.

Having said that, this is a great place to start. Doggy style is about a 3/10 as far as degrading behaviour goes.

[–]470_2_700_nm -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (1子コメント)

This is my favourite subject line in a while.

Thanks.

[–]stew7000 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Lol - backfiring sounds messy

[–]MuhTriggersGuise -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (0子コメント)

It's either a shit test or a comfort test OP. What's degrading about getting on all fours? Did you say "get on all fours bitch", or say "I'm going to fuck you like an animal"? No? Then where's the degradation? It's a different sexual position. Whoopity doo. You need to be more sharp and able to understand shit tests and comfort tests when they come, instead of acting like it's some fucking mystery and come running here for an explanation.

Your response should've been "What exactly is degrading about a different sexual position" and her response would've clued you in more if it was a shit test or a comfort test. You did the wrong thing by reacting to her emotional state (IE entering her frame), and should not start trying to find hoops to jump through for her at the slightest vague hint of her emotional state changing. How is that maintaining frame?