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How would you handle lovey dovey expectations (self.askMRP)

milkywayer が 投稿

I'm in a long distance LTR. One kid.

Recently I've been putting some RP habits to use. The wife expects the old "love you " good night sort of lines before we hang up. Lines that the beta me used to say to her all the time . I'm not comfortable saying that now that I'm finally noticing the power tilting towards me and noticing respect from her finally . We used to have arguments and fights in the past all cause I would handle everything like a beta that I am. Do I stop saying I love you etc completely?

One other thing , I've stopped responding to most of the stuff I feel she's saying just to get a reaction . Now she asks why I ignore some of the things she says . How would you handle this?

I used to gift her on Valentine's . Birthdays and anniversaries. Now she asks me what I want for Valentine's but expects I'll ask her in return too . I'm not sure how to handle that as she's always been the one giving gifts first and aksjng me what she wants but then also expects a certain gift in return. Feels weird of I don't ask her what she wants .

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[–]mrpthrowa 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Now she asks me what I want for Valentine's but expects I'll ask her in return too

Don't setup a contract (i'll get you something if you get me something).

Just don't get her anything. Valentine's is crap nonsense anywya. If she asks what you're getting her for Valentine's, just laugh at her and tell her she already has you, then ask her what she's getting you for Valentine's. Then go silent.

Presents do nothing for a woman and dry up their vaginas. They pretend to go "awww" and try to have reward sex afterwards but it's almost always lacklustre, because a woman doesn't respond well to being pursued like that, they like to be dominated.

[–]milkywayer[S] 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Well said bro! Appreciate the response

[–]man_in_the_worldRed beret 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I suspect you're confusing "acting redpill" with never expressing emotion to her or ignoring her emotions. RP men express emotions, but they express emotions like a man, and never to seek comfort, validation, or appeasement. RP men engage their wives' emotions, they just don't accept responsibility for them or feel obligated to fix them.

At various points in this lengthy set of comments by /u/jacktenofhearts are some nice "advanced fogging" insights on how to engage your wife emotionally without being beta about it.

[–]tim_rp 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Do I stop saying I love you etc completely?

Do you love your wife? Do you ever feel like telling her? Do that. Don't do it 'cause you're expected to but in the grand scheme of things, saying "love you" at the end of a phone call ain't that hard.

If you don't want to say it at the end of every phone call pull back slooooooowly. If she picks it up, tease her about it. Make her laugh.

I've stopped responding to most of the stuff I feel she's saying just to get a reaction .

Keep doing this. If she asks just say it didn't seem important or make a joke about how you were thinking about her sucking your dick. Keep it light.

Now she asks me what I want for Valentine's but expects I'll ask her in return too

Cool story. What do you want? Do that.

Where are you up to with the sidebar books? -->

[–]milkywayer[S] 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Appreciate the responses bro. I'll put the suggestions to use.

I picked up NMMNG yesterday and read some of The Rational Man. I'm usually reading through the posts here as it presents scenarios I find myself in and can then put to use the responses from fellow MRPs

I've been lurking around here for the last two weeks though. Lots of useful stuff here. I love the community

[–]Ned_Beaumont 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

One other thing , I've stopped responding to most of the stuff I feel she's saying just to get a reaction . Now she asks why I ignore some of the things she says . How would you handle this?

"Sometimes you say things to me just to get a reaction. I ignore them because I'm not interested in drama."

[–]GargantuaBlarg29Red Beret 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Actions. Not words.

[–]ScurvemuchRed Beret 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

gifts are about the gift giver, not the receiver.

A while ago, I did not think wife was worthy of a gift for a major holiday. She asked why I didnt get her anything. I told her I got her me...

Hamster hamster... more hamster... "you don't appreciate me!!"

"you haven't been acting in a way that makes me appreciate you"

Done.

[–]GargantuaBlarg29Red Beret 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (2子コメント)

sprinkle sprinkle sprinkle