In Iceland, some 67 percent of babies are born to parents who are not married. A combination of generous social programs and a secular society have all but made nuptials obsolete—while giving rise to a unique culture of independent motherhood. Annie Ling spent two months photographing these mothers in the Nordic country, documenting their daily lives and struggles. “A lack of social stigma and a relaxed attitude towards marriage and sexual morality makes raising a family as a single parent in Iceland more feasible,” Ling said. Living in a small community means relatives are often close by and can pitch in on childcare. That doesn’t mean, of course, that independent motherhood is easy. “Despite being recognized as an egalitarian society and the most feminist country in the world, there are still challenges,” Ling said. Iceland has one of the highest gender pay gaps in Europe, which means that female-lead households earn considerably less than those lead by men.
In the Land of Independent Mothers
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Jóna, 50, lives in a small town in northern Iceland with four of her five children. Her eldest daughter lives and works in Reykjavík and they remain very close. “We are best friends and tell each other everything,” Jóna told Ling. #
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Jóna comforts her two-year-old son with a fever. #
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Four of Jóna's five children pose for a portrait in their home in Siglufjörður, a small town in northern Iceland. #
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Jóna cooks supper with her two youngest children who share the same father. #
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Katrín, 36, warms up a plate of food for herself after putting the children to bed. She is a kindergarten teacher and student while she raises two children—seven and four years old. #
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Seven-year-old Erlingur is the older of two children Katrín had with her ex-partner. They were together for seven years but never married. #
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Although Katrín and her ex-partner alternate weeks watching the kids, it's difficult to be a single mother with no free time to study, especially in the evenings after doing housework. #
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Katrín prepares Erlingur, 7, for bed. Katrín, an only child herself, receives a great deal of support from her mother who is a widow. The children often sleep over at their grandmother’s house. #
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Hlif, 27, is the mother of two autistic children and is studying social work. She was engaged but never married to the father of her two children. They separated after seven years and he lives in Reykjavík. The children stay with him every other week. #
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Family welfare provides extra support for children with autism. Daycare is also “good and cheap” according to Hlif, who also finds relief one weekend each month when the city pays for someone (even family members) to watch the children. #
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“It’s harder to raise the kids by yourself, but it’s better not to be in a negative environment,” she told Ling. Hlif said she never saw her parents fight because her parents raised her separately. #
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“Mothers are shunned if they are not present in children’s lives more than if a father raises the children alone,” Hlif said to Ling. “It is also harder for women (especially single moms) to take time off if the kids are sick, when men are paid better.” #
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Hildur, 33, lives and works in Reykjavík as a Spanish teacher, and is a mother of a toddler who is one and a half. #
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Hildur’s parents have a good marriage and have been happily married for more than thirty years. Many of her friends are also single mothers. #
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Currently living in an apartment rented from her parents, Hildur got pregnant one year into her three-year relationship with her son’s father. #
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Hildur walks with her son. #
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A single mother of five children, Jónna, 48, works as an artist and educator. The nature of her artwork is very personal, examining what it means to be a woman, drawing often from her relationships and experience of motherhood. #
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Jónna with her 17-year-old daughter. She became pregnant with her first child when she was 17 and raised her with the help of her parents because her then-boyfriend did not wish to have children. #
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A detail from Jónna’s livingroom. #
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Three of Jónna’s five children live at home with her. Having raised the kids independently while her ex worked at their joint retail business, Jónna said “I love to be alone.” #
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