Every time I try to “breakup” with this girl… I block her number. Then I get lonely. Then I unblock her number and start talking to her. Then we’re “back together.” Repeat ad infinitum. At least 3 or 4 times so far. She’s 34 and I’m 31. Here is what divorceprobability.com tells me:

Your score is 129 which puts you in the Very Strong Probability category. Very Strong Probability The news is not good. You're amongst a demographic of people that have the lowest long term marriage success rate. What that means is that based on the factors that you indicated, there are many things in your life that significantly contribute to divorce and very few, if any, factors that contribute to a long term successful marriage. Does that mean you should never get married because you're almost guaranteed to get divorced? Certainly not! Everyone is different and your circumstances may be completely different than someone else who scored much better than you. You may up happily married forever after, but statistically, the odds are against you. However, now you know that based on the 20 factors we know have a significant impact on the outcome of marriage, you scored among the lowest level. That means that you likely have significant obstacles to overcome to ensure that your marriage stays healthy and strong. It will take a lot of effort on your part, but knowing in advance always helps. In your case, we very STRONGLY recommend that you adjust your budget to ensure that you can cover yourself against the unexpected. In any event, we wish you the best of luck!”

The truth is… I don’t want marriage. I’ve already failed at it with previous relationship, she turned out to be a cheater AWALT. The current girl that I can’t have a stable relationship with wants to marry me one day, but she would just make my life more miserable with having to be a parent and supporting her as well (she doesn’t work, is in therapy for bipolar but not medicated, I have therapy and medication for bipolar), my standard of living would decrease and so would my possibility of retiring at 60, which is a strong possibility for me being single.

MGTOW, how do I break the cycle? What do you do when you get lonely?

See my other post for more details: https://www.reddit.com/r/Marriage/comments/5qi0ul/xpost_should_i_get_married_again/

Thanks for any advice.