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[–]TheLaughingRhino 516 ポイント517 ポイント  (101子コメント)

When I was growing up, a friend of the family, he was older than me, was like a big brother to me.

As his "little brother", he genuinely wanted the best for me, tried to guide me, tried to impart the lessons he learned from his mistakes, tried to explain how the world worked to me. As much as anyone in this life, I loved him. To me, he was family.

He met the girl of his dreams at his work. She eventually got a better job but they moved in together. Lived together for four year. I thought they were the "perfect couple" but I was young and naive and just starting college myself.

He got cancer. He spend about three months in the hospital and when he came home, she said she was leaving. Said she found Christianity and couldn't live in sin anymore. He asked, what about the four years we were together, where was this Christianity thing then? Then he said OK, I love you, marry me. No more sin that way. She said No.

He died a year later. He loved her until the end. Not something he said to her, not something he said to anyone else, but to me in private, he said even though she abandoned him when he was at his lowest, that he loved her. To be fair to him, he was sick. Also this was like getting hit with a truck all at once. He was also getting chemo and lots of medication. This is one time where I will say I don't want to hear any "He was blue pill and a loser" fucking horseshit. So he loved her until the end, that's how he felt and he was honest to me about it.

When he died, I did not see him. At the very end, he was in a bad way and told his brother not to let me see him. He didn't want me to remember him "that way" In his eyes, and I understand it, I was still just a kid, I was to be protected, it wasn't something he wanted to inflict onto me in his eyes.

He did see one of his very close adult friends he worked with and he told him "Never trust a woman, never"

That same guy he told, I ran into years later, and told me that he found out that the ex girlfriend had started cheating on my "big brother" about two weeks after he was in the hospital. She had already written him off as dead. My good friend, my "big brother", the guy who tried to school me the right way and guide me, the guy who would have DIED FOR THIS WOMAN, was throwing up and getting irradiated while she had some other dudes fucking dick in her mouth.

What helps me with women, and I learned very young, is imagine you are dying. What would she do. Would she stay? Would she hold on to the bitter end? Would she love you just as much as the first day? To me, this is the litmus test of a woman's character and one of the biggest reasons I will likely never get married.

When he was no longer useful, she left him to fucking die. Most of them will leave you to fucking die as well ( who the fuck are we kidding, AWALT)

This does not just apply to girls, this applies to all people - Invest in those who invest in you. Invest in good character. Be a good character person yourself. Treat others how you want to be treated yourself, just filter out the truly shitty people from your life first. The only people I call "friends" are people who would give me a kidney if I was dying, would go down with me to the last fucking bullet, would ride and die with me if I had to take on the entire fucking world.

Can you find a guy like that? A true brother? Sure, not easy but not impossible.

My "big brother" would have died for me. Not one moment of hesitation. I would have died for him. He was my family.

Can you find a woman like that? Sadly no, but if you do, then maybe you've found a keeper. She will still be AWALT, but maybe there's a chance for you. I don't think such a woman exists, but if others want to hope, I wish them well in their search.

"They will leave me to die alone, no matter what I've done or how much I love them, when I serve no more use to them."

That right there is how I completely disassociate any real investment in any woman out there.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 135 ポイント136 ポイント  (36子コメント)

Awesome comment man, thanks for posting. And at the risk of sounding trite (I'm sure you've heard this before, but I'll say it again anyway): I'm sorry for your loss (re: your "big brother").

I went through something similar about 10 years ago (although my process wasn't quite as long and drawn out, and I didn't die, obviously, though I came very, very close): I was engaged to a woman at the time, a young Russian girl who, I thought, was "The One" (so you already know where this is going)...

Was friends with her for almost a year before we finally started dating (major red flag right there, little did I know at the time), dated for a couple of months and then she hit me with "I'm going back to Russia to visit my family, if I get stuck there, you'll come and get me, right? You'll MARRY me, and bring me back to the States, right??" "Sure!!" I said, thrilled that my one-itis and I would be tying the knot shortly. Of course the girl got stuck in Moscow, couldn't come back to the States (visa problems), I flew over to marry her, and the authorities actually wouldn't let us do it (despite the fact that I had all the paperwork etc), because, get this, they didn't believe we were a real couple!! (There's another red flag for you, when a total stranger doesn't believe that the girl sitting next to you could possibly be your real girlfriend.) The woman who worked at the marriage license office said "Come back in 2 months, if you still want to get married then, we'll let you do it." "No prob!" I said, "See you in two months!!"

So I get back to the States, start having trouble breathing (I'd already had it for a few months but now it was getting REALLY bad, like I could barely walk), saw a bunch of doctors, nobody knew what was wrong with me, and then finally, one day I physically collapsed just getting out of bed. Rushed to the ER. Turns out: I have the most severe case of blood clotting they've ever seen. Docs can't believe I'm still alive. Can't believe I'm even breathing. They want to do open heart surgery ASAP--like, crack my chest open in the next 5 minutes, and start scraping. A friend pulls me aside and says "I overheard the docs talking, they don't think you're gonna make it. Anything you want to do IN THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, do it now. You have 5 minutes." I told my friend where to find the screenplay I'd just finished (and who to get it to), then I texted my fiancee and said "Call me RIGHT NOW, I'm going into surgery, and I may not come back out. They don't think I'm gonna make it." (She knew about my breathing problems and that I'd been seeing doctors all over New York, so she would have known this was no joke.)

Thankfully, a new doc rushed in a minute later, and recommended they put me on blood thinners for a few hours first, to see if that'd help dissolve the clot. Surgery postponed--for now. I'm wheeled to the intensive care unit, where I sit for 10 FUCKING DAYS. Seriously, people who'd had full-on heart transplants came after I did, and then left before I did, it was that bad. The next day my mother arrives: the hospital, AGAINST MY WISHES, had contacted her, telling her flatly "Your son isn't gonna make it, come get the body as soon as you can." I joked "Yep, still here, I guess they miscalled that one..."

And of course, all this time: NO WORD FROM MY FIANCEE.

Finally, after almost a week in the ICU, I get a call from her. How am I doing?? she asks--like nothing's wrong at all, not a cloud in the sky. "Still alive" I say, "Though barely..." I ask why she didn't call earlier. There's a LOOOONG pause on the phone, and then (get this) she says "Baby, you know how it is... The phones, here in Russia..." (That's an exact, verbatim quote. I'll never forget it. Never.) I say "So let me get this straight: I tell you I'm dying in the hospital, and you're telling me that you couldn't call me because you couldn't find a working phone. IN MOSCOW." I couldn't. Fucking. Believe it. And then, here's the best part:

"You're still coming to marry me in a few weeks, right? We're still on for that, right?" I tell her Alas, no can do, thanks to my life threatening condition, which I'm still recovering from, I won't be flying anywhere for at least a year. Doctor's orders. "Oh" she says. "All right. Fine. Feel better. Bye." And that was it.

So the girl I thought I was in love with, was gonna spend the rest of my life with, etc etc: as soon as I'd exhausted my usefulness to her, I was forgotten in an instant. The fact that I'd almost died? Didn't matter one bit.

Briffault's Law above all else: the relationship continues so long as the woman continues to derive practical benefits from said relationship. WHEN THE WOMAN CAN NO LONGER DERIVE BENEFITS FROM THE RELATIONSHIP, THE RELATIONSHIP CEASES TO EXIST. If you're in the process of dying, all she's thinking is "Right, this guy's done, gotta find a new provider, let's see here..." And the hunt begins anew. (This assuming she doesn't already have backup guy in place, which she almost certainly does).

I like to think of is this way: a woman finding out her man is dying is like a man finding out his job is going to stop paying him soon. If your boss called you in and said "Hey man, we love the work you're doing here, but just to let you know, WE WON'T BE ABLE TO PAY YOU ANYMORE, STARTING 2 MONTHS FROM NOW", you'd start looking for a new job right away, right?

So it is with women and their men. We're just "jobs" to them, practical providers of products and services. Nothing more.

[–]ScarletNumbers 21 ポイント22 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Feel better

Hey, she told you to feel better. That was nice...

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You know looking back I probably should have just told her "Yep, we're all good, see you in Moscow in a week!!"--and then never shown up.

Ghosted at the altar.

[–]derp_derpington 12 ポイント13 ポイント  (1子コメント)

That job analogy makes too much sense.

[–]Purecorrupt 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Women view relationships the same way men view careers. You can even hear it when people talk about themselves.

Female description:

"I'm a mother, aunt,etc."

I even notice when they talk about their relationships they more commonly referred to their "fiancé, husband, boyfriend" rather than the person's name (John, Brad, and Chad).

Male description:

"I'm an engineer, doctor, lawyer etc." or "I snowboard, play football, video games etc."

[–]theredpill22 46 ポイント47 ポイント  (11子コメント)

Sounds like you met a particularly horrible bitch who manipulated you from the start.

I'm all for AWALT, but there's no way most women are this ruthless.

[–]4Auvergnat 33 ポイント34 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Perhaps, but you're still better off believing that all people act out of sheer personal interest alone, and that they won't be there to get your back if there's no benefit to them.

[–]notParticularlyAnony 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

but you're still better off believing that all people act out of sheer personal interest alone, and that they won't be there to get your back if there's no benefit to them.

Dude were you raised in foster care or something what the fuck.

Peter Griffin listening to Lionel Richie.... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QpnvTjtpyIg

[–]4Auvergnat 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Just being practical. The glass is already broken

[–]paoro2 30 ポイント31 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This.

"Alright, feel better. Bye."

I wouldn't act like that if my friend had a fucking cold.

[–]SmellyMonkeyFace 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I would have to disagree, I have a cousin that spent a few years beating a really difficult cancer only to be cheated on by his wife and left for the other dude. So AWALT.

First thing I thought when I heard was well unfortunately you were weakened by your treatment and were weak overall. She had to take care of you so you became the energy vampire in the relationship. She had all the power in the relationship. So yeah AWALT.

I always figured if I get sick and can't take care of my wife she will cheat on me. I'm much happier not worrying about if it will happen and instead expect it and be prepared for it.

[–]newusernamereddit 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (2子コメント)

She is Russian, it is in their culture.

[–]Thrwoawayaccuont 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Being a heartless gold-digger shouldn't be part of any culture.

[–]full_package 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I disagree about Russia, but there's something about this in some people coming from Moscow. That city breeds ruthless competitiveness bordering with psychopathy.

Anyway it's just one red flag among a whole bunch of others in this guy's case. It's clear that this girl was just a dumb traveling student who wanted to party and continue traveling and a marriage to a foreigner was just easy means of doing that.

[–]10J18R1A 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

They may not be this BLATANTLY ruthless, but they're ruthless nonetheless.

[–]CQC3 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I've always been pretty cynical even in my BP days, but I agree that this is just a particularly extreme example. Shit, it always is when you have a woman who's trying to gain citizenship and using a man for it.

The fact is most people engage in relationships out of convenience and mutual benefit. We live in a stale society, it is relatively safe and most people will never have to be put through a trial of fire with someone else, and so it is nigh impossible to really fully tell how far others are willing to go for you. That's why people grow so much stronger through shared experiences.

And so you have to imagine there's tons of half baked bonds between people that fall apart when it no longer makes sense to hang around one another. We've all had friendships like that, call it a moral grey zone. I think this is why childhood friends tend to be so cherished for many people, you share a unique bond that no one else can have with you. They've seen your infancy, who you were before you learned how to pretend to put on a good show.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I absolutely agree: this was a more extreme case. And it's true that not all women will be this (ahem) "practical" about such matters.

BUT, at the same time, we must remember AWALT: all women HAVE THE POTENTIAL to be like this. Just like all guns have the potential to be loaded.

[–]okiedokie321 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (2子コメント)

To be fair, Russian women (and a lot of foreign women for that matter) are ruthless and devious. They learn from an early age.

[–]Rufferto_n_Groo 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This story sounds like a passport scam...

[–]askmrcia 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (3子コメント)

I like to think of is this way: a woman finding out her man is dying is like a man finding out his job is going to stop paying him soon. If your boss called you in and said "Hey man, we love the work you're doing here, but just to let you know, WE WON'T BE ABLE TO PAY YOU ANYMORE, STARTING 2 MONTHS FROM NOW", you'd start looking for a new job right away, right?

Yea the difference here is now we live in a time where women can provide for themselves. So that analogy of comparing a company letting you go to a woman's boyfriend/husband being useless doesn't make sense.

So no, I'm not letting women off the hook like that. What that girl did is pure evil and selfish. I'm sorry you went through that. Your story pissed me off because I could not imagine for the life of me being that selfish.

Let me say this again, this woman can provide for herself. Women today can get jobs for themselves. So its not like they have to depend on men, The fact that they can just throw men away like this over the first sign of adversity says something about women today.

Thanks for the story. Another reminder of never getting married. I know if I loved someone or a girl and she was in your position, she would be getting phone calls, pictures, texts, video messages and gifts sent to them at the hospital.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

My analogy was meant to reflect the attitude of: you don't go to work because it's fun, or because you love being there etc, you go to work because YOU GET PAID. If your boss told you "Pretty soon we won't be able to pay you anymore, but we'd love it if you kept working here FOR FREE..." you'd start looking for a new job the very same day.

So it is with women and relationships: they are in a relationship with you because they receive a BENEFIT from their association with you (much as your paycheck is a benefit of you going to and doing your job).

Maybe the benefit she receives is that you're ridiculously good looking, and she can show you off to all her girlfriends and make them jealous.

Maybe you're quite wealthy, and you can shower her with gifts (though this, increasingly, is more a path to the friendzone than any kind of sexual relationship, as women these days will peg you as a beta provider. You're correct in asserting that women have their own money now, and thus don't need men to seduce them with dollars... In fact it's often a turn off).

Maybe you're hilariously entertaining and she just loves being around you, because you're so funny.

The benefits come in a wide variety for sure but make no mistake, there IS a benefit there, or the relationship would not be taking place. And as soon as the benefit stops, the relationship stops.

Imagine a girl is dating a guy: they have nothing in common, they don't really like each other, nothing to say, but he's in a semi-famous band. So she brings him around, shows him off to all her friends, repeats over and over "I'm dating a MUSICIAN. He's in a BAND X. Soooooo hot..." etc. Then one day the guy is like "Yeah, I left the band. Well I got fired, actually. They found a new bass player. But whatever, it's cool. I'm over music anyway. I need to get a real job. I'm gonna go to school and learn to be an accountant."

And that's it, no more music, the guy's done.

Now tell me: how much longer do you think that relationship will last?

Answer: it's already over. She's not gonna stick with the guy while he starts his new life as an accountant. The girl's already looking for a replacement musician.

Once you really grasp and internalize this concept, "Us men, we're just 'JOBS' to women", you'll see the sexual marketplace in a whole new light.

[–]askmrcia 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Makes sense when you put it that way lol. Yea messed up world we living. Again, I hope people read what you wrote and understand that this is why you should never trust them

[–]BENDERisGRREAT 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Relationships can make a great "team" out of two people as long as the girl is the one that the team will benefit. If not you get hit with the "I dont think a relationship should make me feel this way." Or "Waking up nest to you literally disgusts me." And the bitches can say it like theyre telling you it might rain tomorrow...

Fuck my feelings when I was there for 2 years of you having breast cancer and were ashamed to take off your bra, fuck me in general I guess

[–]thechugganautbitch 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I had a girlfriend once who went through some really bad depression for a few months while we were dating and I thought I loved her so I stuck through it.

She ended up getting put on medication and everything was good for awhile. But then I lost my job (that wasn't a factor in her leaving, I never bought her shit) and other things happened and I became quite depressed. Anyway she ended up saying something like "You are depressing me and I want to have fun. I deserve to live my life".

You can be there for a woman in her hardest times, but she wont be there for you in yours. Or at least that's what I've experienced.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Indeed. A man's love is sacrificial, a woman's love is not.

I can't tell you how many couples I've met / interacted with where the woman's like "Yeah, we make a great team!", and then about a minute later you realize what this actually translates to: "He does stuff for me, that's his part, and I let him do stuff for me, that's my part. Thus EVERYBODY wins!!"

And the funny thing is, it actually makes sense, this is how mother nature wants things to be: the man provides, and the woman receives. The masculine puts out, the feminine takes in. Even sex itself is, physically, set up this way. Perhaps then, we just need a word other than "team" to describe the process. If relationships were labeled more in terms of a hierarchy, or a chain of command, far fewer men would be left confused and floundering.

That's not to say that there aren't some couples out there where the woman is pulling her weight, for from it (certainly I know a few). But I have to say, it's becoming an ever rarer thing these days, as modern women become ever more entitled with each passing day ("I want the freedom to fuck whoever I want whenever I want to, as if you and I were exact equals, AND I want you to pay for everything and take care of me, as if I was your submissive dependent, ALL AT THE SAME TIME"...).

[–]BENDERisGRREAT 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Yeah Ill pay for the first date, she pays for the second. No the second date is never nearly as expensive as the first.

Tell some people that and it blows their mind

[–]chadeusmaximus 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Hey thanks for that story. And the point about briffault's law at he end really cast some light on what happened with my college girlfriend.

You guys are all awesome.

[–]porkmaster 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Can't leave us hanging on the screenplay.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Never got produced, alas. Thought we had some money coming in for it (we were looking at $5M), was gonna be my directorial debut, but then the financial crash happened and my rich friends weren't so rich anymore.

I may still do it at some point (these days I'd do it for under a mill), but it really would be a vanity project. Low budget indie drama, character ensemble piece (a la Bergman etc), not exactly Hollywood's cup of tea at the moment.

It's definitely very revealing though, isn't it, when your friend tells you "You have 5 minutes to live." Man, you really get to know what your priorities are, in a situation like that. Looking back, I guess it's pretty funny (and very telling) that my only response was "MAKE SURE YOU HAVE MY SCRIPT AND GET IT TO THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE!!", and that was pretty much it (aside from calling my non-responsive fiancee of course). Might be an interesting experiment, to hit more people with this kind of situation (hypothetically of course) and see how they respond. What happens to all the art you made? The things you wrote? The photos you took? Who gets the phone calls? With only 5 minutes total, how long do you talk to each person?

Something to think about. We all imagine we're gonna live forever. Nobody ever really thinks: "What's gonna happen to that finished-but-never-published novel sitting on my hard drive, if I'm hit by a car tomorrow?"

[–]frenchpuppy2 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Sounds like you're getting emotional from "see the way reality truly is." Your turning red pill philosophy into women-shaming and it's not really gonna help your situation. Also she was Russian and was attempting to extract a very obvious benefit from you. Are you really that surprised? You can try and apply your negative judgment to all women but it won't put you any closer to truth. Thinking all women are like that is your attempt to simplify the world around you but its simply not true. People come in a billion different colors, with varying shades of love, commitment, and worthiness.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You know, I used to think like you did. Almost my entire life, in fact. Such a hopeless romantic. ("When she's down, I'll support her! And when I'm down, she'll support me!! Because we're in love, and that's how love works!! A truly equal partnership!!") And you know what it got me? The woman in the story above. Not just once. But EVERY. SINGLE TIME.

Then I swallowed The Red Pill. I opened my eyes and saw intergender dynamics for what they ARE. And you know what? Strangely, that terrible woman in my story? The one I kept getting into relationships with over and over again? (Not the SAME girl, mind you, but the same TYPE of girl? And the same type of relationship?) Yeah, that's not in my life anymore. And never will be again.

Funny. How 'bout that. It's almost like ALL WOMEN ARE EXACTLY THE SAME... (If only we had a word, or some kind of shorthand, to use around here to describe exactly this phenomenon. Hmm...)

(Also: you must be new here. Welcome. The sidebar is over to your right. Please read before commenting.)

[–]thechugganautbitch 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I agree with you for the most part that the woman was obviously trying to use him (except for the "women-shaming part. lol. i don't imagine you are a TRP regular using sjw language like that), but I think your opinion is simplistic as well. Your last sentence is nice and idealistic, but not completely true.

Men and women are different and often times view relationships differently. I'm not saying that is a bad thing, it just is. Men and women have many inherent biological differences and imperatives. That is bound to affect how they approach relationships and life in general.

If the egalitarian dream is true, and we are all just individual human beings who are all the same except for things like skin color and genitals, I would think the divorce rates would be equal among men and women. But they aren't. Women initiate far more divorces than men do. If we are all just individuals with varying shades of love and commitment, then why is that? It should be 50/50, or very close.

[–]TheDialecticParadox 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

You were pretty BP by the sounds of it. It doesn't surprise me she didn't give a shit about you dying. BP men are expendable assets to women. As soon as you've lost your purpose/use to her, you are gone.

RP men tend to get better treatment from their plates/LTR's.

[–]IGoYouStayTwoAutumns 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Oh I was the king of BP, no doubt about it. I was the guy who, when I found out my best friend was fucking my girlfriend, I'd be like "Hah hah, gosh, you two! Wow! You really got me! Hah hah hah..." Seriously, I couldn't have been more of a doormat.

You know how they have the Darwin awards? I've often thought they should have the BP awards as well, just so we can all (once a year) take a step back, laugh at ourselves, and, at the same time, see how far we've come.

But yeah, the funny thing is: you know, I don't blame her at all for the way she acted. I really don't. At the time I was devastated, sure, and even now, I do still feel some emotion come up when I review my memories of what happened, but looking back at it all now through an RP lens, it's like, Well OF COURSE she didn't care... I was just an expendable asset to her. I was her ticket to a green card. There was no emotional investment there. I was the solution to her problem, and as soon as I was taken "off the table" she was like, OK, we gotta find a new solution here. That's it. I totally get it.

To be honest I actually included her as part of my 12 step amends process about 2 years back. Bumped into her totally randomly out here in LA (talk about a crazy coincidence, all these years later), and then I reached out and said "Look, I get it now, I TOTALLY get it, and I want you to know I'm sorry that I wasn't stronger for you, back then, that I wasn't more of a man for you", etc etc. I basically apologized (as best I could) for being a BP pushover, not knowing what was up, the whole deal. Of course she just kind of shrugged it off and didn't really care (the amends was more for me, to clean up the narrative on my end), but yeah, damn, remembering all that, it's like Wow, I CANNOT BELIEVE that I used to be so ignorant, so blind...

So yeah, thank God for TRP. This place really is one of the best things that's ever happened to me.

[–]rp_southsider 43 ポイント44 ポイント  (3子コメント)

They will leave me to die alone, no matter what I've done or how much I love them, when I serve no more use to them

This is one of the deepest, darkest truths about human relationships I've ever read.

[–]frenchpuppy2 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Broad-sweeping generalizations are never truthful.

[–]BENDERisGRREAT 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

except for the 99% of the time that they are

[–]Platos_slow_brother 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Broad-sweeping generalizations are never truthful.

I guess we have to chuck out as untruthful philosophy and large chunks of history's better lessons for us.

[–]Rommel0502 64 ポイント65 ポイント  (1子コメント)

FWIW, this is one of the most well written posts Ive ever seen here.

[–]trpintrper 25 ポイント26 ポイント  (0子コメント)

It really is. I mean I read it all without realizing how long it was.

[–]phoenix_reborn84 20 ポイント21 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is one of the most beautiful posts I have read on Reddit. Thanks for sharing.

[–]Schhwing 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Awesome comment man. I have to add, that men's relationships between each other are based on very different things than men's and women's sexual relationships. Things like honour, respect, "till the end" attitude tend to be present in male relationships but absent in male and female relationships. So, of course, your relationship with your brother was very different than his with his girlfriend.

I think this is down to genetic survival. Basically, a young woman needs to be with someone that can reproduce, for the good of the species. As a young man needs to be with a young woman. It works both ways. I have heard stories of a similar situation as yours but reversed genders. The young man left the young woman.

It's important to always remember the cold hard truths underlying the emotions. Relationships are based on utility - for each other firstly, and for the species secondly - and feelings are just genetic adaptions to make sexual relationships work. I think women just get turned off towards men who will die if they are in their prime. It's not personal, it's necessary.

[–]APSTNDPhy 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (5子コメント)

Ok but on the other foot my mum sat at my dads bed side for months and months while he was dying of cancer. So there's that too.

[–]BENDERisGRREAT 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Thats a generational difference, when women were expected to not be sluts.

[–]APSTNDPhy 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (2子コメント)

I do think what that chick did is a low even by AWALT standards.

[–]BENDERisGRREAT 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

My point is your parents probably went through that in a time where a woman getting a divorce was social humiliation, whereas now #YouGoGirl

[–]VoyPerdiendo1 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's a difference in character, stop trying to fit the world to your model.

[–]CrashXXL 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That was depressing as shit.

[–]notParticularlyAnony 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (1子コメント)

That sucks. For every guy like that there's a poor woman like him with cancer getting screwed over by an asshole dude who's cheating. Assholes aren't gendered. Remember John Kerry's running mate John Edwards, he got a woman pregnant while his wife had cancer. People can be pricks. It's about luck, vetting, and then you have to sometimes trust. There's no way around it.

[–]Platos_slow_brother 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Remember John Kerry's running mate John Edwards, he got a woman pregnant while his wife had cancer.

Yeah, and I am betting John Edwards' wife had not had sex with her husband with a smile on her RBF for 10 years prior to Edwards knocking that other woman up.

When I see some middle-age battle-ax woman hollering about her cheating husband, the first thing I tend to think is, "When is the last time you fucked him with a sincere, warm interest in sex with him?"

Because the answer is almost always, "a long, long time ago." Then the woman have the audacity to be upset when the man gets sex elsewhere.

[–]1takethedive 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I'm sorry for your loss. I appreciate that you chose to share this story with others.

I will build on this with a quote from a very controversial writing that may help pass on this perspective to those reading along:

"Reject the parable of 'Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.'

Do only unto others AS THEY WOULD DO unto you, and no more." - Anton LaVey

This is a reminder to keep the warmth and love alive in our hearts, but to award it only to those who have proven that they deserve it.

"Magnanimity, not carte blanche kindness." (sic) - IllimitableMan

I am certain that many men will benefit from the lessons your big brother passed on.

Edited for clarity.

[–]ConfusedPsychiatrist 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Thanks for being bold and sharing what many might feel is taboo. It's validating to me, because I often have felt this deep down. Why give people the very best of how I wish to be treated and have them mistreat me still? Don't treat people superbly because you wish to receive the same from them. Treat them how they deserve to be treated and with what you are currently willing to give without any strings attached. If you want to love 100%, only do it because you at that moment want to be that--not because you are supposed to or are hoping the person will give the same back.

tl;dr: Yeah. Treat others how they deserve to be treated, and only give as much as you're comfortable giving.

[–]TomFoo 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This comment is better than 95% of the sub posts.

[–]Pitchfork51 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (1子コメント)

But if you don't marry you will die alone.

Lol what a crock. Assuming you are one of the 20 percent (whatever it will be in 50 years) that doesn't divorce your woman will be stuck in an alzheimers home while you slowly die at home or vice versa.

[–]Endorsed ContributorSirGaetanDugas 27 ポイント28 ポイント  (0子コメント)

We all die alone.

Your 5 kids, beautiful wife, and 12 grandkids and dog may be by a your side with candles and prayer but make no mistake:

You go out alone so have no regrets lingering

[–]Gross_Guy 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Holy shit. Well worth the read. If I may, allow me to do a short Tl;Dr. Not out of spite or sarcasm just to spur interest in this solid post, seriously.

Tl;Dr: Op had a friend like a brother who was dying of cancer and learned the true nature of women through this when she cheated on OP'S friend 2 weeks into him going to the hospital for treatment... what a sad and provoking story.

[–]watcher45 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (22子コメント)

That bitch was not a real Christian.

[–]towelwork 14 ポイント15 ポイント  (20子コメント)

[–]bishopindict -2 ポイント-1 ポイント  (19子コメント)

This is not an instance of the Scotsman fallacy.

[–]towelwork 12 ポイント13 ポイント  (18子コメント)

Why do you think so?

watcher45 implies Christians wouldn't act as deplorable as TheLaughingRhino's "big brother" friend's girlfriend did. She did and considers herself a Christian; watcher45 therefore considers her to not be a "real" Christian.

In my opinion, this matches the criteria for NTS just fine.

[–]bishopindict 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (17子コメント)

The entire point of theism in general is to provide an objective moral framework for the peasants, and claiming to belong to any such religion without even trying to act in accordance with its moral standards is laughable.

E.g. If you have decided to act in accordance with christianity OR just having accepted god you do not under any circumstance commit adultery. Another severe inconsistency is how she refused the have pre-marital sex with her boyfriend while she was out getting fucked. No version of christianity condones this.

You can't change your identity by merely claiming to be something you're not. Actions > Words.

[–]4Auvergnat 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (15子コメント)

that's a great comment.. but that doesn't negate the fact that this is a great illustration of the scotsman fallacy. try again.

[–]Horus_Krishna_5 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (14子コメント)

there are real Christians. just not that particular woman

[–]MisterDorimant 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (13子コメント)

In order for any given christian to be real, they simply have to exist in reality. Therefore all christians are real.

Same could be said (and is often said) for girls and Men. The same logic applies.

I don't know of any imaginary christians, do You? Even though he is imaginary, jesus christ himself isn't a christian unless he worships himself. I don't think he does, so it could be said that he is an unreal non-christian. Beyond that, anyone with a pulse is real.

[–]Horus_Krishna_5 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (12子コメント)

don't matter what they believe but does matter what they do

[–]blackchadthundercock 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

None of them are. It's not in their nature.

[–]theredpill22 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

That's real man. Your brother sounded like a good dude, may he rest in peace.

Can't emphasise the importance of finding the good people among the hordes of shitty ones. There's a lot of shitty people out there, particularly at college age. From then on, people either mature and turn into good people or else they learn how to hide it better. The cynic in me tells me it's the latter.

Insecurity, jealousy and nastiness are rampant in your late teens, particularly in girls. That's just been my experience.

[–]logician9000 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is worthy of a main post.

[–]Bodybuilder1453 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

I truly hope that bitch will get the worst karma out there. I would fucking laugh if she would get anal raped and tortured to death. Fuck her, WHORES like that make my blood boil. I feel sorry for your friend, may he rest in peace. Poor guy.

[–]verify_account 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Why are you angry and the nature of women? You have much to learn. You wont' ever be able to deal with them if you don't understand them. Stop respecting women like you respect men; that's your first and biggest mistake.

If you drop a piece of steak on the floor, do you get upset when the dog eats it?

[–]penumbrae 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This is a good story. Of course I won't judge a sick dying man, ever. But this comment got me so blue pilled up, I might menstruate, binge eat chocolate and cry for a day because of it. Better hit the gym & lift, don't you think?

[–]Deformat 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Wow man. Huge stuff there, sorry to hear about your "big brother". I had my own situation of one-itis with this woman I wasted my time with her for about a year, then I started getting attached...

Someone in her family had an accident, and she expected them to die. She broke up with her ex, I was interested, so she called me for a glass of whisky. It was 27 December, thus it was cold, and a bit of snow. We got out of the bar, and she saw a guy on the ground. I ignored him out of reflex ("Jesus, not another beggar...").

She pulled him. His face was full of blood.

She says, "come and take him". I ask her whether she knows what she's doing (me - 20, she - 25). "Take him." I ask her again the same thing. "Will come and take him?".

So I take him. He was half-conscious, and we moved him to the boulevard, where we expected an ambulance to come. We call his sister, she arrives with his mom in about 15 minutes. They tell me that her wife left him for another dude, took his money and his girl. They were living in Italy, and he came back to Romania (my home country) to celebrate Christmas with what was left of his family. Apparently he tried to drink to forget his sadness. 30 mins later, the ambulance came. The paramedics told us diplomatically that we "should had let him there".

Only later I found out that if he had fallen on the big concrete block next to him, he could've died in my arms. Well, he could've died in my hands anyway, all we had to do was leave him there.

What had did my woman after that? She told me that I was cynical and insane. And that she did nothing wrong. And continued to manipulate me. She wanted to get laid that night and nearly got to hit on a dude in a club afterwards. Couple days later, we argued on something else and broke. A few days afterwards, we get back, and head to this ex' club (he owned the place) where he was waiting. I thought "I don't have a chance", but "hey, maybe at least I get free alcohol". I didn't. They argued like idiots. Afterwards, she wanted to meet with a different dude (???) who worked in a different club. I said to myself the same thing. This time, she and this dude come together.

However, the ex comes. With a band of motorcyclists. And they argue for money. I leave, drunk, and thankfully avoiding the whole fight violent fight afterwards. A few good months later, I decide she's trouble and break it up indefinitely.

Two years later, I found out why they had that fight: apparently she wanted a child from that ex of her she fucked. The dude didn't care, so she took care of her the violent way.

[–]TheReformist94 -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm glad you put in the "I don't want to hear he is blue pill loser". Absolutely.people on this sub are busy being beta jumping through hoops to act all alpha to retain their girls attentions.its pathetic as fuck. Women give fuck all in return for all our love and investment

[–]Class_Punk 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Completely fucked up, but unfortunately when I read this it meshes with other stories I've read.

[–]tolerantman 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

If this happened to me I would find the bitch myself and give her some justice treatment that would inspire poetry.

[–]juliusstreicher 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Yeah, I'd heard somewhere that when Humphrey Bogart was dying, his wife, Lauren Bacall, was out fucking Frank Sinatra.

[–]ImSecretlyATurtle 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I really enjoyed reading this story. Very deep and impactful on your life I'm sure. Allow me to impart some wisdom that I learned from a mentor of mine.

Her behavior is not unique. Her behavior is not surprising. If you get really sick with cancer or other severe illnesses, your girl will leave you. Why? Simple. She is with you because you have value to her. Social, financial, physical, emotional, whatever it is. That's why she is with you. She is benefiting from being with you. Once you're in the hospital with cancer, the tables turn. Now she is the 1 with value and you need her help and at the very least, emotional support. She has now not only lost her source of value (you), but also is being forced to become a source of value. Of course she is going to leave you!

It's nothing personal. It's just nature. Be aware of this. But don't let it dissuade you from pursuing women. Just understand what will happen if you lose your job or become severely ill.

[–]Spongbeb 74 ポイント75 ポイント  (22子コメント)

it's quite true.. you'd all be very surprised at how much and how easy it is for a girl to get a dicking.

[–]3rdParty2012 46 ポイント47 ポイント  (12子コメント)

Just the other day I watched my friend who is a guy, and my friend who is a very average looking girl sit on plenty of fish for about two hours. We were joking around writing opening messages to girls on my guy friends phone, and reading openers guys send the girl. She, a very run of the mill, slightly overweight girl, got 79 messages in less than two hours.

[–]askmrcia 28 ポイント29 ポイント  (10子コメント)

Yup a girl I know who was a single mom (baby in her tinder pics) showed me while she swiped on tinder on day.

She swiped right on every guy and she easily had over 50+ matches or something insane. It was before they had that swipe limit added to it. She was a 6 at best and somewhat overweight. She was fuckable, but damn nearly every guy she swiped right on she matched with.

And she got messages instantly. Her phone died like 10mins because she kept getting notifications from Tinder.

[–]sigma272 18 ポイント19 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Chubby single moms tend to be the pickiest women for some reason. The sad part is that white knights get pulled into their frame every time.

[–]antariusz 18 ポイント19 ポイント  (2子コメント)

That's because women have been cuckolding men for hundreds of thousands of years at this point. It is bred into some of us at this point. Raising another man's child "did" help pass along human genetics to the next generation. So if there was a group of men willing to help raise another man's baby. Well, the entire group benefitted. Let's say it's a recessive genetic trait. 25% of men exhibit the behavior. That's more then enough to keep showing up in the population.

[–]my_sfw_alias 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (1子コメント)

24.99.. I will never, ever date another woman with a kid.

[–]4Auvergnat 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (3子コメント)

That's the very reason why you should only do tinder if you have looks/photos that stand out to catch her attention. Because unless you do, your profile and first message will be drowned in dozens of other average profiles and first messages.

[–]a_can_of_tea 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Which is statistically amazing you get laid at all.

My friend from HS (probably a 5, nothing special but she was cute and not overweight) would swipe and get hundreds of matches.

She's 18. She was getting 26 year old dudes with ripped abs messaging her asking her out.

She's pregnant now at 20.

[–]1awalt_cupcake 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

goddamn to get that much sex. must be the life.

[–]1sailorJery 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

not really, it's like being born on third and thinking you've hit a triple. You have no idea how to capitalize on that type of success because you didn't do anything to get it in the first place. So, women with no direction are inevitably, naturally, parted from their source of success. Their looks. And then you're left with the entitled attitude of the post wall woman.

[–]harkrank 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Most guys sweep right on all girls without even looking at the photo. If you match with an ugly girl you just unmatch. Of course she will match with all men. Even without a profile picture she will.

[–]askmrcia 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Swiping right is one thing. Getting messages from all these guys are another. That was my point unless you miss read what I said. These guys were thirsty enough to message her and she was low quality.

So it wasn't like her and girls like her are getting unmatched.

[–]moontripper1246 61 ポイント62 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Dude.....girls literally don't understand why guys learn game because its just that easy for them to get laid. They can't conceive that its actually kind of hard to get chicks to fuck you (if your a scrub).

[–]Ou-tis 23 ポイント24 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Women solipsism.They don't get that they have to do nothing to be approached and they don't understand what have to do a man because they just don't have to do it. And they don't know (and even if,they don't care) what kind of loneliness and feelings of rejection a man face. And if you try to explain it to them,they don't get it because I think they don't have the ability to do it.

[–]dissentforall 8 ポイント9 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This goes the same for violence and deescalting potential fights. I've had many discussions with exs about the different social responsibilities. According to them, drunk guys getting threatening rarely happens and I was over exaggerating, especially about fighting over women.

They never had to deal with it so it doesn't exist.

[–]ArcanineNo059 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Psh surprised? All a girl has to dob is log onto any social media and BOOM 300 random (not necessarily in her state) dudes are desperately trying for nudes let alone to actually fuck... Very few females cab be trusted... My boy taught me some wise words... "Every woman but my mother is potentially just a whore... And for some even their mother is a whore"

[–]kasper138 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (3子コメント)

I doubt most people would be surprised.

[–]slay_it_forward 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Yeah, how could anyone be surprised at this point that pretty much any woman get can a dude to enthusiastically fuck at the snap of her fingers. Women hold all the sexual power.

Must be nice to be someone like Bieber, who can take some of that power away. A man has to be at Bieber level to have the same sexual power as a 22 year old hb7.

[–]verify_account 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Must be nice to be someone like Bieber, who can take some of that power away. A man has to be at Bieber level to have the same sexual power as a 22 year old hb7.

Pretty humbling to think about this. A good reality check. I think I'm pretty great, but I'll never hold the same sexual power as a 22 year old hb7 and I think it's good to never forget that.

[–]Spongbeb 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

even veterans get surprised... its nuts man.

[–]1sailorJery 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

no one who's swallowed trp would be surprised at all. That's the entire nature of the sexual marketplace. Women are the gatekeepers of sexual contact.

[–]2ex_addict_bro 84 ポイント85 ポイント  (7子コメント)

This is a good idea, I disagree with the implementation. Why would I think about a girl getting fucked? I'd rather think about who do I want to plow myself today instead.

Few weeks ago I was running into an oneitis. I started every single day thinking what would I do if the girl calls me and lets me know we're done (shit, we know girls don't work like that, but that was just my fantasy). After a few days I realised she's nothing special and I don't really need her any more. After a few days more I started banging another woman. And another. And another.

They aren't special at all.

And if they don't call you back, that's because they're probably getting fucked. But that should be none of my concerns.

[–]GizmodeGarage[S] 38 ポイント39 ポイント  (2子コメント)

But you not wanting to think about it is exactly why it works. Depending on how bluepilled you are it will send shivers down your spine and you'll immediately stop wondering about all the stupid relationship shit and going over the things you said to her in your head.

Of course this wont work if the reason you are ruminating over her is directly because she is fucking other guys.

The setting is you're with your bro, and you're annoying him by fawning over some girl so he says "yeah . . . she's probably out getting fucked" and you're like "holy shit fuck yeah" then you snap out of it and focus on your video games or whatever the fuck you were doing haha.

[–]TripleRedWhey 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Your idea of saying "they're probably getting fucked" is similar to the idea of negative visualization. Expect and visualize the worst, so that if it happens, its power to affect you is weakened.

[–]GizmodeGarage[S] 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Oh thats exactly what it is for, thank you

[–]GizmodeGarage[S] 17 ポイント18 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Like seriously this saved us SO many nights of lonely blue balls

[–]Sandman616 -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Good comment. Assuming she's probably out getting fucked still keeps her as your oneitis to some degree, because your focus is on her, and not yourself.

[–]GizmodeGarage[S] 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Are you the same sandman that does the MGTOW videos haha

[–]tuckermalc 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (0子コメント)

shorty wanna kiss me, but i know she suckin dick

[–]Harry_Fraud 41 ポイント42 ポイント  (15子コメント)

I'll settle down when I find myself a girl who loves me as much as I love myself.

My love for myself is irrational. It's like dividing by zero. I'll always love me enough for the both of us. She'll never be mine, it'll just be her turn.

I've vowed to myself to never stop growing, to never stagnate again. And honestly, every single day, to maintain my momentum and keep heading towards my goals I have to take immediate, massive action. So I do.

Girls look for stability, and on paper, I'm not what they're looking for. But fuck me if I haven't already Alpha Widowed several hotties in my area.

I'm not sure if my thirst for power and domination comes from mating instinct/sexual strategy or if it results from compensating for the powerlessness I felt in the abusive relationship with my narcissistic father, but I am who I am, and I'm fucking proud to be me.

My therapist has told me many of my insights will only be understandable by me-- that I will not always be able to articulate my thoughts exactly to convey or share them with others. But that's okay.

They always said, "The Bullies are always the most insecure" but the older I get, the less true that seems. My lust for power and showing it absolutely has pushed people out of my life, but the five dudes I keep around as good friends all call me out on my bullshit. And honestly, I think that's what I'm looking for, and what I value them for. My mother and older sister shit test me harder than any girls my age or under ever have.

If you, as a Red Pill male, still do not view yourself as the prize, and are falling victim to Oneitis, become more Machiavellian in your actions, and more narcissistic in your thoughts. Cultivate passions and thrive, don't live. One of my favorite adages is, "Build it, and they will come." Until you live in the flow, learn to recognize and pass shit tests, and graduate to turning down sure sex because a chick fails a shit test of your own creation, you are still a boy, not yet a man.

I know I am not yet a man, but I also know that I will I never stop growing. Such is my choice. The greatest blessing I ever was given in life was the luxury to choose.

[–]sergeantbbbbs 33 ポイント34 ポイント  (7子コメント)

"She's not mine, it's just her turn"

Absolute GOLD mate

[–]shlobbybox 24 ポイント25 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Or just don't settle down. Women are disqualifying machines. The one who you think "loves you as much as you love yourself" is just putting on a show until you fail at the slightest thing and she gets the opportunity to disqualify you.

"I love you" is code word for "I want you to love me, so I can feel 'naughty' when I go fuck someone else" and nothing more.

[–]SeemedGood 27 ポイント28 ポイント  (0子コメント)

The one who you think "loves you as much as you love yourself" is just putting on a show until you fail at the slightest thing and she gets the opportunity to disqualify you.

I just explained to my 15 year old son that women "love" men like men "love" the latest iPhone, Retina MacBook Pro, Callaway Hot-2 3-wood, or Porsche 911 Turbo. We don't really love those things in and of themselves as much as we enjoy what those things can do for us - and as soon as the next better one comes out, your "love" turns to mild like and eventually indifference.

[–]Wordlessjaguar03 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Do you know what a shit test is? Why women created them? Why would a man need a shit test to test the genes of a women when he does it with his eyes?

[–]Wollingwight 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

They are useful to figure out what kind of person someone is. If you will take anything I guess it does not matter that much

[–]Wordlessjaguar03 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Men don't shit test women. We just use our eyes to see if we want to have sex or not. A shit test doesn't fit in with male biology.

[–]JorixKienu 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'll settle down when I find myself a girl who loves me as much as I love myself.

Gold.

And NEVER forget : the first disqualify : she nexted.

Abundance mentality. She is either a resource or a burden. Next her if not willing to be a resource to you.

[–]Returnofthemack3 15 ポイント16 ポイント  (10子コメント)

yeah, it also helps to really visulalize what she's likely doing for other guys lol. Like when you get oneitis, imagine her getting jizzed on, her licking his asshole, all sorts of shit. While some of it might not be happening (personal preferences vary), a good deal of it most definitely is. Seriously, visualize it as graphically as possible, it'll help you de pedestalize her a bit

Hard to pretend a girl is some unicorn when you are visualizing her going ass to mouth lol

[–]Sandman616 12 ポイント13 ポイント  (6子コメント)

Meh, I tend to go the other way with it. Imagining a girl slutting it up just makes me wish she was slutting it up with me. I prefer imagining her doing what she's more likely to be doing, seeking validation through the social medium of her choice while basking in the glow of her Netflix subscription. Then I proceed to think she ain't shit while I continue working on myself.

[–]Returnofthemack3 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (4子コメント)

I just meant for the guys out there that over glorify/pedestalize girls into these unicorns. Obviously the idea is to become the guy doing that to the chicks, but it's not gonna happen if you're treating them like some kind of special creature. I think the point went over your head a bit

[–]Sandman616 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (3子コメント)

I get what you're saying, for the type of guys pedestalizing girls, pedestalizing them in the other direction is a logical next step. But objectifying them like that still puts them on a pedestal and, like someone else said, it's a little cucky. Acknowledging how boring she most likely is while staying true to your own personal development seems the more productive choice, to me.

[–]SeemedGood 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

it's a little cucky

Not if it's deconstructing the pedestal via your sheer disgust with the repeated low-level admission of what's likely actually happening.

It works. I've used the technique before and it has really helped me to maintain the right perspective and extract myself from becoming enthralled (literally) by the beauty of a woman's soul while fully ignoring the fact that her physical vessel is not at all aligned with that soul. Ultimately it also helps me to recognize that women who are that misaligned with their spiritual selves are damaging and disrespecting their own souls and that's both just unattractive and to be avoided.

[–]GizmodeGarage[S] 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Well being a "little cucky" is better than having total oneitis. Acknowledging how boring a girl is, is pretty impossible when you have strong oneitis. Imagining her fucked some hot guy whos not you however, and being forced to, off guard, by your friend, does give that shock needed to knock out the beta hamstering.

Your friend has to do it to you or vice versa, and you have to have fun afterwards. I'm not advocating sitting around thinking about the love of your life boning random guys Hahhaahaha

It goes like this: "Oh Annie is so beautiful and kind I really want to be with her."

"Yeah. . . she's probably out getting fucked."

"OH GOD! What the fuck."

"Wanna play basketball?"

"Fuck yes."

[–]Sandman616 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I'm not advocating sitting around thinking about the love of your life boning random guys Hahhaahaha

Ahhh, that's the disparity. Still in the process of building my social circle so any time that I'm not spending at work, at the gym, or with my son is time spent alone.

[–]Chlorinated_Spheroid 9 ポイント10 ポイント  (1子コメント)

The weird thing is whenever I do this it makes me hate them more than anything else. like they're not even worth my time, but idk. Maybe it's something along the lines of "we hate things we can't have"

[–]Sandman616 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Good point. Seems like a toxic thought process for guys in the anger phase.

[–]Ivabighairy1 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

TRP in a nutshell: Be the guy she's fucking, NOT the guy that's thinking about her.

[–]boogalooshrimp1103 7 ポイント8 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Using this combined with Patrice O'neal's two girls one cup mantra would do wonders for a blue pill mans mindset

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QPcVFZmg7uI

skip to 14:06

[–]mushroommountains 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Damn there should be a whole post just for this

[–]Rommel0502 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (0子コメント)

This struck me as particularly funny. In my younger years (early 20s), whenever me or my best friend were "dating" someone and it was inquired where they were, we would universally respond with - "I don't know. Probably out getting fucked."

[–]cloudmax40 36 ポイント37 ポイント  (9子コメント)

It may not be true

It's always true. If you're on the one fucking her, or she isn't directing her attention towards you so that you do fuck her, someone else is.

It's actually really disgusting when you think about it. She's permanently assimilating someone else's DNA (it's called micro-chimerism, yes it's documented), she is permanently lowering her value, and permanently lowering her ability to pair-bond.

All Onitus is based on delusion, and a lack of information you have about her.

[–]Fedor_Gavnyukov 27 ポイント28 ポイント  (0子コメント)

lack of information you have about her.

that right there is the most important part. the less info you have on her, the more you yourself hamster in your head "what could be" or "what is". you are creating a false reality for yourself about this person and thus propelling yourself further into the rabbit hole of this false identity you had just assigned her. then, when you find out that she's the complete opposite of what you had made up in your head, you feel "betrayed" and think "how could she do this to me". kek. don't be a hamster.

[–]anylegtypes 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (1子コメント)

micro-chimerism

This is not at all documented to occur through human sexual contact.

[–]notParticularlyAnony 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

It happens when they are pregnant. So basically your cells are part of your mother. People do not integrate the DNA of people they have sex with. lol

[–]Willkuer_ 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (2子コメント)

It's actually really disgusting when you think about it. She's permanently assimilating someone else's DNA (it's called micro-chimerism, yes it's documented), she is permanently lowering her value, and permanently lowering her ability to pair-bond.

It's disgusting yes. But only because of your (and my) social conditioning. Maybe it even increases her physical value by increasing the strength of her immune system. Or it decreases her physical value because of the higher likelihood of autoimmune diseases.

However, a high n-count is obviously lowering her ability to pair-bond (according to some studies) and thus decreases her non-physical value. I wouldn't mix these two.

IMO this is childish MGTOW behavior to connect the dots like that. Let's just accept male/female nature and biology as it is and not demonize it.

[–]cloudmax40 -1 ポイント0 ポイント  (1子コメント)

Maybe it even increases her physical value by increasing the strength of her immune system.

Doesn't.

But only because of your (and my) social conditioning.

Someone else's DNA permanently in her brain is disgusting.

non-physical value

Value as a future wife / mother / person over all.

IMO this is childish MGTOW behavior to connect the dots like that.

The dots are there. Pretending they aren't there doesn't make them not there.

Let's just accept male/female nature and biology as it is and not demonize it.

Micro-chimerism is real, accept it.

[–]Willkuer_ 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Doesn't.

You don't know.

Someone else's DNA permanently in her brain is disgusting.

You probably have your mother's DNA in your brain. 'Disgusting' is a matter of definition.

Micro-chimerism is real, accept it.

I never claimed something else. The implications you draw are just not necessarily true. We just don't know.

[–]Readypill 11 ポイント12 ポイント  (3子コメント)

This hits home quite a bit. I've been single for a while, seeing random chicks and not committing to any of them, recently I met a chick that stood out, hot, intelligent, etc. I brought her on a trip where some friends and I rented a place, and we went out that night, I was busy gambling and she left with some of my friends to go to a club. After a while of gambling I head to the club and the chick I brought with us is all over some random dude and my other friends are no where to be seen. I ask her "what the fuck?", and she plays it off and goes outside for a bit with the guy. My friends show up, and my man card is gone. "Sorry bro, that's fucked, as soon as we got here she stopped hanging out with us and has been with this random guy from her past." We were leaving and the chick followed us out, "I'm so sorry.. I don't know what I was thinking.. blah blah blah". I fucked her a couple more times that weekend, but it made me put her back in her box. AWALT!

[–]red-adherent 10 ポイント11 ポイント  (2子コメント)

Can I ask how you managed to fuck her after that? I just can't,it's like if a chick does something disrespectful I almost feel like I instantly lose attraction. How do you guys get it up for these disrespectful hoes?

[–]Readypill 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

You know, I ignored her for a while after that shit, that shit fucking hurt. But she was persistent with trying to make up with me the rest of the time we were there even though I told her to fuck off. I guess when I comes down to it, pussy is pussy, and having fallen off the faux pedestal I had put her on, I didn't care about going as deep as possible and slapping that ass until it was red, felt good man.

[–]epixs 6 ポイント7 ポイント  (0子コメント)

any self respecting man wouldn't, fuck that. Aint no fuck/girl worth losing my dignity.

[–]hugaddiction 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

A wise freind recently told me, as to my oneitis;

"assume she already fucked some of your friends"...different saying, but the same idea. If you cant cope with the idea that she fucks other guys, your way too far in for safety. Pull back a little, and reevaluate.

[–]Dah_Brazilian 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I thought I'd share something that happened to me recently that will hopefully stay in some of your guys head. So an ex of mine from years ago broke up with her boyfriend then a week later she got in contact with me cause she remembered how I used to fuck the shit out of her when we were younger. Well after 8 years of no contact she messaged me and 2 days later I was fucking the shit out of her again and her ex kept calling and messaging her and even sent flowers to her work to win her back even though she made it clear she wants nothing to do with him. My friends don't be this guy! If you have an ex and she doesn't wanna talk to you she is most definently getting fucked or making plans to get fucked. Girls are so savage sometimes. I felt bad for the guy but thats what happens to guys who make girls think they are in control. I bet she is even going to go back to him lol and he wont even care when she tells him about me like a fucking doofus

[–]Unabummer80 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

On The Black Philip Show Patrice said that to get over that feeling he would imagine his wife getting railed hard by someone with a bigger dick. Sounds cucky, but he said it was one way to get past that paranoia.

[–]ecosci 5 ポイント6 ポイント  (4子コメント)

Dont be so hard on yourself just learn female nature and have options dont sweat the small stuff all women will be getting fucked when the right alpha crosses her path it just boils down to if he wants her not this is nothing new.

[–]notParticularlyAnony 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (3子コメント)

Did your mom do this? I'm not being a dick I'm serious. I say this to point out I think this is total bullshit. Not all women are like this. My mom was loyal. Once my dad died she doesn't go out with other men, still, and it has been many years. Some women are good and loyal, some aren't. The trick is vetting them and not going out and finding damaged goods with daddy issues who work at strip clubs.

[–]BENDERisGRREAT 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (2子コメント)

not to be a dick but how do you know she didnt?

And thats not even bringing up the point that your mom probably didnt grow up in feminism where its socially acceptable to not be married till 30 and get a divorce.

[–]SpinachPrince4 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Well lies are not the way to mitigate opposite lies. Just understand that she's as special as millions of other girls, and has her pros and cons.

[–]freebase1ca 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

I always found this phrase useful:

"It doesn't matter how gorgeous she is, someone somewhere is tired of her shit."

Helped remind my friends and me that everyone is just human - get over them. You never have a shot if you put someone on a pedestal anyway.

[–]DntPnicIGotThis 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (4子コメント)

The Red Pill is probably the realist sub on reddit. Solid advice.

[–][削除されました]  (3子コメント)

[removed]

    [–]DntPnicIGotThis 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Wow. You actually took time out of your life to write all that out. Classic 1upmanship. I feel sad for you. TRP is the realist sub on Reddit but remember this is still Reddit. Take it all in stride. Think before you post. Keep lifting.

    [–]notParticularlyAnony 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    If that is the amount of thought you put into things, I'm not surprised that you think this thread contains the pearls of wisdom you need to navigate life. Keep picking winners bruh.

    [–]Flawless44 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    As I gain more experience, I find this more and more to be true. People's personalities are all different, but there are still a lot of AWALT traits. It really shouldn't come as a surprise that high value people, like other high value people. Guys want pretty, sexually adventurous, sociable women, and girls want handsome, fit guys who are socially capable and dominant when necessary. Everybody likes these people. They are desirable and get what they want, and can do what they want. That's where their shitty or awesome personality makes a difference. If you are not one of those people, and you are up against one of them, you will usually lose. Combine that with those people doing whatever they want, and you get the reasons for most people's crappy experiences with the gender of their choice. Having said that, biological differences do have an influence, after all, the hormones mostly run your brain, and men and women are different in that regard.

    [–]2JamesSkepp 3 ポイント4 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Love the idea. Simple and applicable immediately.

     

    I vaguely remember a thread from a year ago or something like that.

    A high SMV (has game too) dude meets HB10. She's not like other girls, RIGHT?

    They fuck (hard and multiple times) on (eg.) Monday night, she wants (very) to meet on Tuesday, he can't make it. They meet on Wednesday morning, they fuck. She trickles truth that she fucked some other dude on Tuesday.

    In a span of something like 12h she managed to squeeze another dude in, despite meeting the best man she ever met so far (I'm pretty sure she said it too).

    Probably out getting fucked.

    [–]yummyluckycharms 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    People might laugh, but 9/10, its probably true. If you've been on other side of the fence - the guy doing the fucking - I've lost track of the number of times the girl's bf/husband/bff/parents call when you've got her bent over backwards or just getting fucked silly.

    You can make it a game and see how long after fucking you will she check the message or return the call. How long before you're asked to leave or she has to head out.

    [–]victor_knight 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    As often as she wants to, yes. It really is that simple for most women.

    [–]wanderer779 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I think that when the chips are down you'd be surprised how many turn out to be of this type. This goes for male friends too. As you get older you start to be able to smell it on people. The trouble with women isn't that they'll fuck you over. You are going to get fucked over at some point, that is almost a certainty, but you can recover. It's that we get tangled up with them and can't get out of it, and then they end up fucking us over and over again.

    Everyone does little things that reveal their character. The biggest clue that someone is to be avoided, in my opinion, is a lack of accountability or humility. Here I'm talking about adults - a lot of younger people are like this, but some people don't grow out of it. As you get older you will meet a few people who are good as gold, which makes it easier to see the snakes. This is a super important life skill.

    [–]stranger17 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I've always had this kind of self-talk -- 20 years settled down with the same girl, kids etc but nonetheless always remember we are human. We aren't monogamous by nature

    [–]Insydeinformation 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Hahaha, like a cold shower.

    [–]oshouseofreps 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Its like my brother wrote this post. Thanks to him I've internalized the shit out of this phrase

    [–]FaceItPoker 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    I think i got the solution to that

    [–]Jedy_hacker 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    In Romania we have a little Saying that goes like this:

    "Fuck your woman in the morning or someone else will fuck her for you, by the the time you come back from work."

    [–]Jax77789 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Saying she is getting railed by someone else blocks the pedestalization process but will not tackle thirst-induced reactions. To me the only sure way to get to true IDGAF attitude is to know that you 1) can get girls easily enough 2 ) have passions and stuff you place above everything else, things you do because YOU love doing them and not for others. If you are not sure about 1), believe you can. Matters not it is not true. The antidote to oneitis is abundance mentality.

    [–]SomeoneSeeksPurpose 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Fuck man, this hits home so hard. This has always been the way I think about the girls I like. Even right now, the girls I have a good eye for are, lets see, one on an exchange, another on a trip across the world for half a year with her friend and the third has a boyfriend. Of course the latter one is getting fucked, and that doesn't bother me in a committed relationship, but the two others... Man, I can just imagine them banging some random chad because noone will know about it back home. Then they will play the innocent girl act when they are back. This really is my biggest problem. I am still low smv, so to think my favourite, seemingly high quality girls are out there travelling, probably getting dicked on a very regular basis, by multiple dudes, really fucking hurts.

    Does it ever get better? :(

    [–]sepelion 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    All beautiful women have been used like a cumdumpster for the amusement of some guy who is way out of their league; that's a reality of the modern Western hypergamous world. Even as good-looking women get older, they never truly want to "settle down" or fuck some beta bux, they still want to be the cumdumpster for a guy way out of their league, but they realize they can't get that guy anymore. Anyone who's read Sexual Utopia or browsed here long enough knows this.

    Let's make this more powerful: "she's probably getting fucked in the ass behind a dumpster at a bar by some guy she met less than an hour ago, who's looking at his watch with an hour countdown being sure to go from first impressing to cum in her ass in under one hour."

    "She's probably on a Tinder date after the initial convo was "I'm going take you out to McDonalds and fuck you in the toilet", and his abs made her reply to his audacity rather than block him, and he's sticking the burger in her mouth to stifle the moaning from his dick in her ass while calling her a "noisy bitch."

    "She's probably at Home Depot sampling some hot sales associate's wood before he brings her the fertilizer."

    "She's probably at her dentist appointment mumbling out with the spit-sucker in her mouth "aftr you whten my teef wanna whten my fce?""

    [–]1Woujo 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (2子コメント)

    It's pretty reasonable to think that if a girl ditches you, she's out hanging out with another guy. Women need sex too.

    [–]notParticularlyAnony 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Depends on the girl. They often have a whole flock of chick friends and they typically aren't as sexual as guys so don't care as much about getting it.

    [–]Dah_Brazilian 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Girls are very sexual and might be even more than guys. The difference is they know they can always find a guy to have sex with so they aren't as hungry to go out and find guys where for guys its a little harder because guys need to work harder to get laid and have a higher chance of rejection. I've met some girls who fuck guy after guy cause they like it and I've met guys who don't feel comfortable with one night stands so you cant really say guys are more sexual. Its just different for each individual.

    [–]ResentfulDead -4 ポイント-3 ポイント  (3子コメント)

    My SO has never cheated. Stop fucking generalizing and grow the fuck up!

    [–]myfingersarecold 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (2子コメント)

    Perhaps not, and good on her for being a decent person.

    That being said, I can prettying universally generalize for most men with a small anecdote:

    I'm about a 9 on a 1-10 scale. High income earner. Responsible. In shape. All those things. I've always had options.

    My now ex-wife was about as much as you could hope for, I thought. She went off the deep end. We divorced.

    Later found out she fucked 3 guys in the time after our son was born, we separated some time shortly thereafter and she's currently fucking at least two other guys.

    Just don't be delusional is my greater point. Most men are cheated on at some point, regardless of their value.

    Western society places women in a position to explore and exploit the most base and uncontrollable of their natural instincts. There are no unicorns.

    [–]notParticularlyAnony 4 ポイント5 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Some guys tend to serially pick women that cheat, I've noticed. What is it about those guys, I wonder. :) Of all my gals, I think one might have, and she had crazy-ass baggage that I could have spotted if I had vetted her properly and not gone just on her looks.

    My mom hasn't been on a date since my dad died. Granted she's old. But my point is not all women are whores guys.

    [–]ZeCoolerKing 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Yeah listen to this guy. He's a 9, big earner blah blah. I wonder if he picked his wife for her commitment to virtue.

    [–]Arie_R -2 ポイント-1 ポイント  (7子コメント)

    Why? To make sure you don't start to care about someone/like someone?

    [–]GizmodeGarage[S] 20 ポイント21 ポイント  (4子コメント)

    To make sure that you don't pedestalise a woman or have unrealistic expectations.

    [–]notParticularlyAnony 1 ポイント2 ポイント  (3子コメント)

    People need to vet women better and stop picking skanks who cheat. It's really not that hard. Resorting to lies to insulate oneself from getting hurt is sort of...beta. (Just kidding I hate that alpha/beta chimpanzee social structure bullshit, but you get what I'm saying)

    [–]BENDERisGRREAT 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (2子コメント)

    While I agree with you, the difference is just one leaves you for the next guy, and one doesnt leave you but still fucks the next guy. Sorry to burst youre bubble but theyll never be honest with you

    [–]notParticularlyAnony 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Sorry to burst youre bubble but theyll never be honest with you

    You really need to vet your women better.

    [–]BENDERisGRREAT 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    Out of all the women ive ever been with one made it through vetting and that took 2 years... You cant vet for a unicorn

    [–]iLLprincipLeS[🍰] 13 ポイント14 ポイント  (1子コメント)

    Why?

    Because she's probably out getting fucked.

    [–]Horus_Krishna_5 2 ポイント3 ポイント  (0子コメント)

    but but but . . . out getting fucked.