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[–]calisthymia 0 ポイント1 ポイント  (0子コメント)

Between ages of about three and fifteen I was experiencing constant abuse from all males around me. My father thought that I'm gay (which, as I learned later in my life, was his personal bugbear and he actually was relieved to hear that I was trans instead) and on the slightest excuse would spank me on bare buttocks with the buckle end of a belt. For some reason, my mind conceptualized this as rape and thanks to that any description of rape still triggers me. Boys in my age range immediately saw that I wasn't behaving like them and reacted predictably. I experienced everything from concerted bullying to being beaten upon getting caught to one unforgettable occasion when I was used as a training target for an angry german shepherd.

I'm still dealing with the PTSD, 40 years later, and I'm quite androphobic (as in, I instinctively fear all men).